A choice made
by Kryalla Orchid
Summary: is a heart broken.
1. Teaser

**_Disclaimer_**_: I don't own the Titans. They belong to DC and Warner Bros. _

_**Broken record moment:**__ I'm Australian, spelling, slang, word usage is all different. I've done my best to limit the amount of Australianisms in speech (practice makes perfect).  
_

**_Author's Note:_**

_If you watch my tumblr, and I know a lot of you don't, you would have seen the prompt __**i-could-be-your-superhero**__ threw into my asks the second I reopened them. Which I absolutely fell in love with, knocked something together, sat back, looked at what I'd done, and thought "You know what? I could do so much more with this."_

_So, here's the so much more, starting with the original prompt._

**_Big fat warning:_**_ Angst. Actually… I recommend a lot of you don't read this (KATER, AIRDRIE, THIS MEANS YOU) until it's done in a week or two, if you know what I mean. As always, I write for me, I share with you. Sometimes what I write for me doesn't match what you might like._

_Kater, close this right now. I mean it! I WILL EMAIL YOU ALL YOU NEED, TRUST ME. _

_You have been warned._

* * *

**Teaser**

An impossible choice. And only one choice could be made. No second chances, no revision. No possibility of cheating. This trap had been well crafted and Nightwing would lose.

Two keys. Two locks. Two lives. Only one key could be used at one time. The cage belonging to the other lock would be destroyed once a key was used.

One would live. The other would die.

A figure prowled behind him, the click of a cane, the soft shuffle of an uneven gait. "Choices, choices."

Nightwing swallowed heavily as he stared at the contents of the cages. His eyes trailed upward as he examined his surroundings. Surely there was a way to save both. Surely if he was quick enough. Smart enough. Worth enough. He'd paid his dues. He'd saved so many lives, given so much of himself to others, surely the universe couldn't be this hard on him. Wouldn't ask for this much.

Can't breach the glass, that would set off the gas in both cages. He didn't think he could get above the cages fast enough to dismantle the delivery mechanism without it being manually set off. Couldn't count on the occupants being able to help themselves. No hope.

"I love this. What to do, what to do? Oh, the agony you go through, which shall it be?"

Not like the movies. Not like the books. There's no right answer, no way out. A choice had to be made. He had to make it and live with the choice.

He grit his teeth, clenched his fists. "I'll kill you for this."

A metallic sound filled the air, followed by a slap of a hand. "Oooh, my luck is with me today. I'll give you one free shot, but that's all you'll get."

Nightwing rolled his shoulders and grimaced at the flash of pain along his spine. It had cost him dearly to get this far. Batman was out, still battling and trying to make his way in. Nightwing couldn't count on his father making it here in time, especially since neither of them had known about this. It was supposed to be a routine capture. Not… this…

He wished he'd had a chance to alert the Titans, he could have used their help. There'd just been no time. He couldn't call now, any move he made without selecting a key would force the gas release. He was being watched so closely.

"Tick, tock. Make your choice or they both go."

His hands shook and he forced them steady. He had to do this. He had to. There was no one else who could. It was his responsibility to differentiate between the two cages.

In one… Starfire, his beloved, his breath and heart, lay battered, bleeding, dying. The pool of blood at the bottom of her transparent cage was indicative of the short lifespan she had left if she didn't get help. She worked for every breath, her eyes glassy and barely seeing. The chances of her full recovery, well, with one look at her leg and Nightwing knew even Raven couldn't save it.

The other… his six-week-old daughter. Unharmed, thankfully. She gurgled and waved her arms in the air in the general direction of the baby mobile clipped above her head.

A leer from the shadows. "Do you want to try the coin toss? Heads, I win. Tails, you lose."

The keys gave an unforgiving clang as they bounced off each other and dangled before him.

Starfire's gaze drifted from Mar'i to his. Despite the agony, despite the choice he knew she knew he was forced to make, she smiled.

Nightwing steeled his heart and reached.


	2. The first choice

**_Author's Note:_**_ One of the wonderful things about fanfiction is I don't need to give you every intricate detail of character background. You should all know enough to fill in the gaps. I mean, I could give you background, but it'd be a lot of clutter and I think you all want to get to the guts of the story._

_As it is, there's a lot of time jumps. I'm only showing you the important parts. 'Cause again, clutter and time and gut wanting._

_Also, if you're reviewing anon and wondering why your review's not appearing, it's because I'm moderating them more closely now. I've had some less than polite one's lately, so your reviews might take twenty four hours to appear._

* * *

**The first choice.**

It was the simple things which kept them together. Holding hands. The promise of a kiss in a quiet moment. A smile. An invitation to dinner. Knees pressed together as they sat side by side and watched a movie.

A hand grab during battle which lingered a little too long.

The abstract terror one of them felt if the other was injured.

They were happy, their relationship plodding along, mixed in with the duty of being a Titan.

TTTTT

"Soooo… Nightwing huh?" Robin asked one Sunday. He leant his elbows against the kitchen bench and watched her closely. He'd been loath to interrupt her jovial singing and swishing her hips as she worked, but it'd been on his mind and he needed to voice it.

Starfire froze, lowering her hands back into the dirty dishwater. "Yes?"

"I don't suppose I mentioned when I decided to make the switch?"

"He…" She paused and corrected herself. "You did not divulge that information to me, no."

"Pity."

Turning so she could face him, she wiped her hands on the cute, frilly apron she wore and rested her back against the bench to give him her complete attention. "Why?"

He watched her carefully to judge her reaction since she wasn't giving him much to go on. "I'm going to be eighteen in a month."

She tilted her head at him. "I know."

"Batman wants me to go home for it. Or part of it at least. I thought… while I was there, I could work on the suit."

A stricken look crossed over her face before she could hide it.

He went on to explain. "He's upgraded his suit hundreds of times. He knows what to look for, he's got access to the latest technology. It'd all be a great help."

"But…"

"It's time, don't you think?"

Starfire stared at him.

His lips crinkled up in a lopsided smile. "I thought you could come with me. Help me get the style right."

One arm lifted up to curl her hand against her chest. "To Gotham?"

"Yes."

"Oh." Her hand lifted from her chest to tuck her hair around her ear as her expression uplifted and she became hopeful. "Really?"

He straightened and walked around the bench until he was in front of her. Lifting his hand, he cupped her neck. "It's time for that too, don't you think?"

Starfire beamed.

TTTTT

"Are you sure?"

"I have never been more sure."

"But… is it not too soon? Is this not a pivotal moment in an Earthen relationship? I do not wish to sully it by rushing."

"You're babbling. It's cute."

"Dick—"

"Star, let me love you."

TTTTT

"Starfire's floating more than usual," Cyborg noted.

Nightwing concentrated on the screen, his thumbs madly working the controller. "Mmm-hmm."

"She must be pretty happy," Beast Boy added, his grin as wide as his face.

"I guess so."

"Caught her doing the walk of shame," Cyborg said.

"In your shirt," Beast Boy included.

"And not much else," Cyborg finished.

"And?" Nightwing asked. Gone were the days he was embarrassed by his relationship with her.

"Nothin'," Cyborg and Beast Boy chorused, sharing a grinning glance.

"Just congrats."

TTTTT

"Gotham?"

"Yeah."

She looked bewildered. "But… I am scheduled to start at Jump in two weeks."

He swallowed. He'd dreaded this conversation all week, but it had to be done. "I know."

"But— if you are in Gotham, how are we to— I thought we were going together! You were excited and—" Her voice rose in tempo and pitch with every word.

He stalled her before she could get hysterical. "The Bachelor degree in Gotham has a more advanced curriculum than Jump's does. Plus, the professor is really brilliant—"

"What about us?"

Nightwing rubbed the back of his neck nervously. "You could come to Gotham."

"You could stay in Jump," she countered.

He sighed. "I can't."

"You cannot or you will not?" she asked. "Is it not enough I had to enrol under an Earthen persona because you insisted I would not be allowed to study under my own name? We had decided to do this together. We had plans and now I must do this alone? A new school? A new name and you shall not be by my side?"

"I know. I'm sorry."

Her jaw snapped shut at his interruption. "Are you leaving the Titans as well? Or just me?"

"I'll still be the leader," he said. "But I'm handing over day-to-day operations to Cyborg. We've already discussed it. And I'm not leaving you, I'm just going to a different school."

Hurt splashed across her face. "You discussed it with Cyborg before asking me?"

"Umm…"

"You have already made the choice."

"Yes. It's a chance for me to be normal for a while." He shook his head and corrected, "For _us_ to be normal. Try things out. Live in a dorm. Do stupid things. Make new friends outside the circle of the Titans. College is a chance to make friends with people who are following the same career path as us, lifelong friends. I feel as though if we attend school together we'll use each other as a crutch. We won't integrate. We need to do things like an ordinary person."

"I am not normal, Dick. I can never _be_ normal. Even pretending with a hologram ring, this—" she gestured herself, "—is who I am beneath. That will never change."

"I didn't mean it like that."

She studied him further. "You want to do this."

"Yes. I think I need to."

"Relationships are about compromise. About choice. And you made a choice which affected both of us without even consulting me?"

He swallowed. "Yeah."

Her shoulders slumped and she thumped down on the bed. "What about us?"

He knelt before her, placing his hand on her knee. "I love you," he murmured. "This doesn't have to change anything between us."

"But it will. I am told long distance relationships do not work."

"Star, you can fly at supersonic speeds. I have the N-Wing. It's not like we'll never see each other."

"You truly expect to confine our relationship to weekend visits?"

"And emails and phone calls. Summer holiday." He lifted his hand from her knee to touch her neck. "I'd like to try."

She struggled not to cry. He could see it all over her face and his stomach balled up in a knot from the pain he caused her.

"Star—"

"Go away."

"What?"

She flopped backward onto the bed and away from him. "I wish to be alone now please."

It was two days before she spoke to him again. Two days of soul searching and attempted apologies. Two days of alerts without Starfire in attendance. Two days of cautious glances and gentle words from Cyborg and Beast Boy. Two days of glares and snide remarks from Raven.

When Starfire did finally speak to him, she ripped out his heart with three simple words. "We should separate."

Flabbergasted, all he could do was stare at her.

Head held high, drawing upon her regal heritage, she stood out of reach. "I cannot deny you the 'right of passage' which comes from going to College. You should experience all it entails; it is the point of us attending."

"All it entails?" he asked, sceptical.

She looked uncomfortable. "Making new friends, studying…" she swallowed. "Parties… girls…"

"_What_?"

"That is what the first year of College is all about, yes?"

"No!"

She continued undaunted, "Experimentation, finding yourself, determining the direction your life will take. Being _normal_."

"I'm not going to Gotham so I can have sex with _other_ girls!" he snapped, outraged at her suggestion.

"I am not saying you have to," she replied. "I am saying... if the opportunity arose…"

"It wouldn't—"

She sighed.

"I really don't like what you're suggesting," he told her. "I'm not going to cheat on you, if that's what you're worried about."

She stood so still, so stiff as she spoke. "I would rather not have our relationship wither and die under the weight of distance."

"No, you'd rather just slice it up right now than give it a chance," he ranted. "Or perhaps it's you who wants to try something new. Or _someone_ new."

He'd meant the words to hurt and he could see it on her face they did, but she did not allow herself to be swayed. "Since we cannot attend together, then I will not deny you all the possibilities you could experience."

"Star—"

"I will not hold you back. You _cannot_ have a normal life with me. I will not allow this to become a regret for you!"

"Starfire, it's not—"

"Do not make this harder."

Realisation settled in. She wasn't going to change her mind about this anymore than he was going to change his mind about attending Gotham State University. He resorted to pleading. "Let's talk about this. We can try—"

"No."

"It doesn't have to be this way."

The mask she wore cracked when a tear trickled down her cheek.

"Star, no, please." Never in his wildest dreams did he think this would happen. He took the necessary two steps toward her, arms outstretched. His hands grasping her cheeks and he pressed their faces together. "We can work through this."

"Dick, no—"

"Would you do this if I went to Jump?" he argued. "No, you wouldn't, why do it now?"

"Because—"

"Please don't," he murmured and planted a kiss on her trembling lips. "Please."

Her hand wrapped around his wrists and gently tugged his hands away from her face. "I need to go."

He kissed her, arms around her, hand splayed on her back to hold her to him and she responded the same way she always did. The way he hoped she would. She loved him, she did. This broke her as much as it broke him, if he could convince her via his kiss to take her words back…

She pulled away, refused to succumb. His heart splintered with each step she took away from him.

"This isn't what I wanted," he told her as she reached the door.

She hesitated for only a moment. "No one may know the repercussions of a choice. Yours was to go to Gotham… this is mine."


	3. The second choice

_**Author's Note:** It's helpful if you know your Batman lore, but not essential as certain events which occur will only be mentioned in passing._

* * *

**The second choice.**

In the days (weeks, months) following the split, Dick struggled to find his footing. First love was always the hardest, the old saying ringing true in this case. Starfire would be a hard act to follow, if anyone could in fact follow her.

He endured the two weeks prior to him leaving for Gotham with as much grace and dignity as he could muster. The split was (somewhat) of a mutual thing. Amiable almost. Neither of them blamed the other. They were all still teammates and acted as such.

Starfire avoided him, as she should, but she didn't go out of her way to do so. They could awkwardly share the common room together, or fight side by side in battle, but social interaction remained limited. He watched her out of the corner of his eye, convinced if he gave her a bit of space, she'd come to realise it was the wrong decision.

When the day came for him to leave, the Titans gathering on the roof to see him off, Starfire was there too. Even as he hugged his friends goodbye, he kept his eye on her. She waited a small distance away, trying to remain intrusive. Finally, when the goodbyes were complete, he walked over to her.

"Hi."

Her smile was shy. "Greetings."

Aware they were watched, he kept his voice low. "Star, I—"

She threw her arms around his neck and hugged him close in the bone-crushing hug he'd grown so fond of. Shocked, for a long moment he could do nothing but stand there stiffly before the dam broke and he buried his face in her shoulder and held on tight.

"There is a saying among my people," she murmured. "'X'hal finds a way.'" She paused and drew back so she could see his face although she did not release him. "If it was meant to be, it will be."

"But—"

She kissed his cheek, her lips lingering against his ear so she could whisper, "Open heart, open mind. If we are drawn back together, so be it, but do not allow thoughts of me to hold you back."

His heart soared. "You mean there's a chance—"

She smiled and released him. "Enjoy College, Dick."

Settling in his dorm, Dick Grayson returned to the name he was born with. Nightwing would soar the Gotham skies at Batman's side, but Dick Grayson would be the diligent student.

Of course, the name Dick Grayson held some weight in itself, but unless he actually mentioned his last name, people had a good chuckle over his first name and moved on.

His roommate, Alvin, could identify with bad first names after all. Add to that, the poor guy had the last name of Colon. Dick and Alvin were pretty much set for life in social standing. "Did you invite Dick and Colon? Where's Dick and Colon at? Have Dick and Colon arrived? What do you think Dick and Colon do together in their room? Do you think Alvin squeaks when Dick—"

He called Starfire within a week. Just to say hi.

She seemed surprised he would, but he could hear her happiness too as they exchanged information about their first weeks and shared their bewilderment everything was so different. College took a bit of getting used to. His heart still ached they were no longer together, but it was placated a little by the knowledge he could still call her friend.

He tried, he did. He dated, although the girls never made it past the first date. Not that he ever said anything to Starfire; it was her choice to break up and so he assumed she was doing the same sort of thing. The girls he dated just didn't feel right, didn't contain that spark he found so attractive. Kissed some random girls. Had a one night stand or two. Got drunk at illegal parties. Was offered drugs and decided he wasn't that much of an idiot. Pranked his dorm mates. Went to exams hung over. Tried to balance Titan duties with life. Normal, college first year stuff.

The rush and bustle of College life didn't allow much room for reflection, but in his quiet moments he would think of her. Send a short email. Inquire after her course. Talk about general things. They didn't speak much as their schedules didn't match, but they emailed as much as they were able. Starfire's emails were always wonderfully long letters about what she was doing and what was happening to her and their friends. He would see her via the video screen during their monthly Network meetings but there was never a chance to talk about anything other than business. Their relationship was never mentioned, but he could feel their friendship remaining strong.

He settled down again in the second year. He'd let himself go, let himself be normal and admitted Starfire was right about the experience. She was right about a lot of things. Second year was time to knuckle down and become an adult. He decreased the amount of parties he attended, increased his study group time and focused on his future.

Bruce was glad to have him in Gotham, both as Nightwing and as Dick. Their relationship was better in small doses, limited interaction on a patrol, backup capacity used at maximum. Just the wind and the night and the battle. That part of them had always been strong.

As Dick, though, there were certain events he was required to attend and play the dutiful son. He'd been able to avoid that while he lived in Jump and Dick had been nothing but a memory, but once the media had wind of his return to Gotham, the only way he was left alone in his day-to-day life was if he allowed them access to him at Bruce's social media events.

It was at one of those bow tie stranglehold events toward the end of his second year at GSU which changed things.

Dick, and his tendency to wallflower as much as possible when it came to these events, loitered over near the windows in the ballroom at Wayne Manor. The sign draped along the far wall listed whatever charity event Bruce decided to hold, but Dick hadn't been interested enough to read it. The buffet was nice, the hired-for-the-night waiters patrolled the room offering glasses of champagne and various finger foods. Dick recognised several fellow students in the classical orchestra Bruce'd hired to provide music.

Alvin stood next to Dick, dressed to the nines in his borrowed suit, his eyes full of stars as he surveyed the glamorous scene. Dick liked to bring Alvin along for these things, since not only was Alvin a good friend, he was also rather handsome and pleasing to the ladies with his blonde hair, baby blues and limber physique and could deflect some of the interest in Dick. Dibs was a common call, not that Alvin needed it since Dick wasn't interested in dating.

"That one," Alvin said, nodding into the crowd.

Dick raised his eyebrows and looked in the direction Alvin indicated. "Getting in early, are we? We only just got here."

"When you see her, you'll know why."

"Which one?"

"Blue dress, red hair. So, how to play this," Alvin said, rubbing his hands together. "I'm thinking—"

"Dude, that's Babs," Dick said, laughing. "You have no hope."

Alvin scowled. "Bro, I know who Babs is, c'mon. The hottie beside her."

Dick flicked his eyes to the girl beside Babs, watching for a moment as the two girls chatted away. He shrugged. Nice curves, he noticed absently. Great ass. "Ahh. Well, good lu—" Great ass indeed. He knew that ass. Frowning, he stared, hoping for a moment for her to turn around.

"No way." Passing his champagne glass off to the nearest waiter, he pushed through the throng of people toward the two redheads. "_Kory_?"

She turned at the sound of her name, her expression shifting from confusion to astonishment. "Dick?"

Babs looked like a cat with a bowl of cream. A bowl? How about a vat full, her smile was so wide and smug.

"What are you doing here?" Dick asked at the same time Kory said, "I did not expect to see you."

"Bruce made me come," Dick answered at the same time Kory said, "Babs invited me."

He laughed, Kory giggled with him.

"You look great," Dick said, then grinned as Kory pulled a face at him. Hologram ring, a compliment like that was void. "I mean… it's great to see you."

She reached out and their hands found each other's as naturally as breathing. "It is _glorious_ to see you."

He shifted, his hand clammy as his heart doubled tempo but he didn't let hers go. "How long are you in town for?" he asked.

She cast a glance at the madly grinning Cheshire Babs. "Until tomorrow lunchtime. I was going to call you and see if we could have breakfast together to catch up."

"She literally just got here," Babs said and linked elbows with Kory. "Last minute request since my date cancelled. I gave her an offer she couldn't refuse."

He grinned and squeezed Kory's hand. For a moment he thought she would've slipped into town without telling him, but he should have known she'd never do that. "Oh?" he asked, looking at Babs. "What offer?"

"The chance to spend the night with Gotham's most eligible bachelors, of course," Babs said and winked at him.

He laughed and looked at Kory. "And you _didn't_ think I'd be here."

She returned the laugh. "Parties are not your thing, Mr I-don't-dance."

He blinked. "Woah, was that a contraction? What have I missed?"

She giggled and gave him a flirty look. "A lot of things."

"Do you want to dance?" he asked, nodding his head in the direction of the dance floor.

"Hey," Babs complained, tugging on Kory's arm. "She's my date."

"Gonna introduce me?" Alvin asked as he finally joined them. He gave Dick a raised eyebrow as he silently communicated for an explanation as to why Dick was reneging on the dibs protocol.

Dick ducked his head. "Right, Kory, this is Alvin, my roommate. Alvin, this is Kory, she's my… um…" Ex didn't give Kory enough credit.

Kory unwound her arm from Babs' so she could shake Alvin's hand. It was the wrong one to offer, but her right hand was still occupied by Dick's and neither of them were in any hurry to release. "I am the one who got away. It is nice to meet you."

Alvin took her hand. "And you. Dick's told me… absolutely nothing about you."

She smiled and extracted her hand. "That is not surprising."

"Do you go GSU?" Alvin asked, curious.

"No," Kory replied with a light laugh. "I hail from Jump City."

Alvin frowned. "Ahh—"

"West Coast," Dick supplied, knowing geography wasn't Alvin's strong suit.

"That's a long way to travel for a party," Alvin noted.

Kory shrugged. "Wayne parties are legendary. And I have been wishing to come back and visit. Babs' invitation was most fortuitous."

"Yeah, letters and phone calls weren't enough," Babs included. "Sometimes a girl just has to have face time with one of her best friends."

Kory gave Babs a tender look and placed her hand on Babs' shoulder. "Oh, I have missed you also, my friend."

Babs grinned.

"What's your major?" Alvin asked.

"Bachelor of Arts, Languages and Linguistics," Kory replied, glancing at Dick and gifting him a smile. "And you?" she asked, politely.

"Commerce, focus on Economics. So, how many languages do you know?"

"Oh, here we go," Dick mumbled and tugged on Kory. "Dance with me."

Babs tried a half-hearted grab at Kory and missed on purpose. "Hey, my date!" she called after them.

"One dance," Dick returned.

"Just one?" Kory murmured.

"One dance," Dick said, pulling her to the dance floor and into his arms. "I said nothing about how many songs that would be."

She smiled and draped her arms around his neck.

Hand splayed on the small of her back. "It's great to see you."

"You have mentioned that," Kory replied, swaying from side to side.

"It's still true. I missed you."

Her smile went melancholy but she didn't reply.

"How's College?" he asked, returning to neutral ground.

"Most enjoyable," she replied. "I never had a chance to learn like this, I find the lifestyle most agreeable."

"Oh?" he asked.

"Normal friends, Dick," she said and his name sounded like a caress. "Normal life. I never dreamt I could have one. Not here. To be looked upon without scorn, without inquiry, it is a grand thing. I understand why you wished for it."

He smiled.

Her smile was wry. "Although my other duties sometimes interfere with that. It is a hard thing to find time for both."

"Hmm… You should talk to your boss about lightening your load," Dick said.

"I believe my boss experiences the same fatigue I do."

"Yeah."

"I do not mind it. I enjoy both lives. Although I miss the orange."

"I do too."

"And having to pretend I cannot reach a book upon the top shelf, that is most cumbersome."

He laughed.

"And you? How is life for you?"

"Same old, same old. Top of the class kind of thing, what with all my experience. It's pretty interesting, looking at crime from a legal standpoint—"

One hand slid from around his neck to rest against his chest.

Dick tried to ignore the hammering in his chest and remember what he was talking about. "— ah… instead of being able to circumvent most of that."

"I imagine it would be very different."

"It is. There's a lot more safeguards in place to protect police than there is otherwise."

"But a less leeway?"

"Yes and more restrictions on possible courses of actions."

They lapsed into silence, their bodies swaying together. He found it pleasing to be with her like this again after so long, the feeling of butterflies skittering in his stomach. It was like it used to be when they first started, every movement could be translated as flirtatious, every action concentrated on her.

He sighed. "I missed this."

Kory dropped her eyes and toyed with the lapel of his tuxedo. "Dick—"

A voice cut over the top of the music, someone Dick'd never seen before talked on a microphone, thanking everyone for attending and began to speak about why they were all here.

"Must be time for the announcements," he said, releasing her so they could stand side by side and give the appearance of being polite and listening. He left one of his hands on the small of her back and she didn't seem to object.

"This is not one of those cliché bachelor auction nights, is it?" Kory whispered.

"If it was, would you buy me?"

She smiled. "I might be tempted but I do not believe I could afford you."

"That's a shame."

"What is this fundraiser for?" she asked.

Dick shrugged. "I didn't pay attention. Something of Bruce's, I guess, since it's here."

Her laugh was soft so not to alert others. "I did determine that."

"Do you want a drink?"

"Are we going to ignore that poor man?"

"Yes. Drink?"

She smiled. "I would love one."

They talked. They laughed. She told him Silkie tales. They discussed their friends, both new and old, Kory regaling him of many of the Victor/Gar pranks he had missed in his absence. They both ignored the grinning Babs and the confused Alvin, occasionally including them in conversation but mostly they only saw each other. He told her Babs and Jason stories. They took a stroll along the balcony, hand in hand.

It was almost like they'd never been apart.

He watched her laugh at an anecdote he'd just told her. They sat on a couch on the balcony outside the ballroom so close their knees brushed together as they spoke. And when she laughed… beautiful, breathless, carefree, he remembered everything about her and he longed. Acting upon the urge which had been chasing him all night, he leant forward and kissed her.

Kory's laughter died, swallowed up by him.

He might have been a little anxious for physical contact but he managed to keep the kiss tender. Demanding no more from her than she was willing to offer. Showing her want and yet keeping himself restrained. He gave it a long moment, revelling in how well he remembered her lips, how well they responded to him. He reacted to a whole lot of other things about her too.

Encouraged, he leant further toward her, pushed her so her back was against the chair.

Her palm against his chest exerted pressure, a clear signal, and he pulled back just enough to allow her to breathe.

She panted, light gasps as she stared at him.

"Star—"

She shook her head. "Dick, I would advise caution, I do not believe either of us are ready to—"

"Is there someone else?" he asked, relieved when his voice didn't crack.

Her expression softened. "No. There is not."

"But you don't want to restart something." This time his voice did break.

She toyed with his lapel again but didn't push him away. "One successful encounter does not mean we should reignite—"

"What about a one night?" he blurted out without really meaning to. Libido induced, he was sure.

Her eyebrows shot up and her mouth dropped open.

"Sorry, sorry," he cringed, inwardly cursing. "I didn't mean that—"

"You did. Truly, I cannot believe you of all people would say that."

Embarrassed, he pulled back. "Star, I—"

"Are you proposing the liaison of the 'booty call'? Or the 'friends with benefits'?" Her finger stroked beneath the lapel and her thumb across the top.

Now it was his turn to be overcome with surprise. "Um… yes."

He watched her consider that, amazed she would and hadn't starbolted his face right there.

She brought her face closer to his, her eyes glazing with desire. "Because I do believe I would be amenable." She gripped his lapel, yanked him forward and crashed their lips together.

* * *

**_Author's Note:_**_ Because that arrangement always end out sunshine and roses._

_FYI, Comic!Nightwing and Starfire did have a friends with benefits relationship in the Outsider comics. _

_Also, most of you are assuming a certain aspect in the teaser was mutual. I'd just like to point that out._


	4. The third choice

**_Author's Note:_**

_**Hanna**: Thank you for the wonderfully long note. I agree with you in a lot of points. For the comics, after Wolfman and Perez stopped writing the Nightwing/Starfire relationship, Starfire did become the transitional girlfriend. They out grew each other. I wish more people would recognise that. To address the Dick characterisation point you mentioned, yes I do often paint Dick as kind of jerk, that has more to do with how he's represented in the cartoon and the Teen Titan Go comic where's he's very socially awkward towards Starfire and misses a lot of social clues from her. There's even one comic where he takes her on a 'date', knowing full well she thinks it's a date, and bombs out completely. If I was writing comic!Dick, he'd be a lot more confident and sensitive. Likewise, cartoon!Starfire is a lot more naive and prone to allowing it to happen because she's not as clued in to Earthen customs as comic!Starfire is. It's pretty hard to reconcile the cutesy cartoon with a more adultish relationship and include comic aspects and still have them feel like the characters from the cartoon. Anything more I have to say would be spoilers. I do believe Babs and Starfire would be friendly, especially the cartoon versions, if they'd been given a chance. As for fault… well… I'll just leave a spoilers sign there. _

_Regarding Red Hood and the Outlaws, it's not that I don't like it, I just feel it was written very poorly to begin with. Starfire's character was presented in the first issue completely in contrast with what appeared in later issues. I was soured almost immediately regarding both Jason and Roy's treatment of her, and her complete lack of any sort of empathy for anyone and her attitude toward sex. I've seen reader written dialogue to match the exact pictures used which reflect a much healthier attitude and allowing Starfire to shine without degrading her character. When added with the complete about face of her character issue 2 and the fact it took us fifteen issues and a new writer to touch on the questions we'd all been asking since issue 1 about her memories, I just couldn't stomach it. I feel it could have been done very, very differently, or used different characters rather than the ones it did. But a lot of people like that kind of Starfire and that's fine. _

* * *

**The third choice.**

Somehow, inexplicably, they continued to be drawn together. He would fly to Jump for Network meetings rather than conducting them via video phone and they would linger afterward. Babs would have a party and invite her. Karen would have a party and invite him. Victor and Gar held many joint parties over the College years, and Dick attended every single one. And when Rachel decided to have a get-together (no one would mistake that for a party)… bad things would happen if one didn't attend.

Their eyes would meet. Her face would brighten. His heart would thump in his chest. They would sneak at times. Excuse themselves and then find a free room. Or an alleyway. Or a broom closet. Sometimes he'd cart her away to a hotel for the night so they could wake up together. Sometimes, though, he was completely and utterly human about the arrangement.

Sometimes they would hold off the liaison, flirtatious eyes across the room, teasing each other all night before one of them would break.

Sometimes when thing were bad he didn't need an excuse like a party or a get-together to see her. Like when Jason died, "I need you" was enough. She spent the entire week with him then, both as his lover and as his friend. If he wasn't so torn up with grief, he would have seen the difference between the two.

Being with her, it was like he was addicted to those first few feelings of new love. The rush of the kiss. Worry if she would accept his advances. Pride when he made her flush. The tangle of romance with no strings attached. Their liaisons could be months apart or single days, depending on what occurred, Dick supposed that was what kept things fresh.

It was fun for a while.

The middle of his final year at College it began to crumble. Dick knew the friends-with-benefits agreement was unhealthy. He continued to want strings attached and Starfire seemed happy with the status quo.

She seemed different in the bed. More flirtatious, less eager to speak of what was going on in their lives. If they met in a setting which was not conducive to sex, she was more like her old self, chatting and laughing and being friendly.

Dick didn't understand why she was so different. He began to dread the moments after. The knowledge they would go back to being distant. That for her, it was just sex.

He wanted romance. He wanted love. He wanted to appreciate her. Respect. Commitment. He wanted the in-between moments. What they had, it wasn't any of those. There were still emails and phone calls and laughter but often Dick felt like she was simply writing in a diary, her words were so clinical. They never talked about what was happening between them, not in the emails, not in the bed.

Once he'd begun to dread, he began to avoid. If, perhaps, she did want more, he was hopeful she would pursue him. Maybe question.

She didn't.

Oh, there were questioning looks whenever they saw each other, from Network meetings or in the social setting, but when he stopped responding to her flirtatious eyes, she stopped giving them. Her descriptive emails about her life and her course continued as though nothing was occurring. She still acted the same when they met or spoke in a friendship setting.

In his pain and her complete lack of remorse, he grew bitter. The sarcastic and deliberately hurtful comments started.

Starfire, being who she was, called him out on it via a starbolt to the face in the middle of the monthly Network meeting. Then grabbed him by the scruff of his neck and carted him out of Ops and into one of the adjoining rooms, leaving the rest of the Titans to gape.

"What is with you?" she snarled, glowing in her fury. "I have never heard such words from you!"

Fuming, his hair smoking from her blast, he clenched his hands into fists. "As if you didn't know."

"I do not have any idea!" she told him, throwing up her hands. "What have I done which deserves such cruel words?!"

"I never knew you were such a bitch, how dare you disrespect me. I am the leader of —"

She levelled a starbolt at him. "Names have no place," she snarled. "We are not children. Civil words for civil people. What is wrong?"

He scowled at her.

Her eyes narrowed. "My patience is wearing thin."

Nightwing paced up and down the small room, too angry to be civil.

Starfire lowered her starbolt. "My work within the Titans is, as always, exemplary. I do not understand the sudden animosity. What am I doing which is not satisfactory?"

"It has nothing to do with the Titans," he spat.

"Then what?" she asked, her voice rising and her eyes wet. "I do not understand. You have always been able to tell me anything, why are you holding back now?"

"You don't have a heart."

She jerked as though he'd struck her. "What?"

He scowled some more and headed for the door. "I don't want to do this."

"Dick, I truly do not understand—"

He spun. "It's all just sex for you, isn't it?"

"The friends with benefits?" she asked, finally breaching the topic. "That is what this is about?"

"What the hell did you think it was about?"

Her face twisted in pain. "You were the one who suggested it! I did not expect anything to continue after that! I thought you would— Do you truly think I wanted this?"

"I don't know what you wanted."

"I respected your decision to withdraw from me," she snapped. "You indicated it was over, I stepped back! I have been following the Earthen rules as much as I can. What more could I do?"

"A lot more than what you've been doing!"

"I do not understand!" she wailed.

"You didn't stop me! You _wanted_ this to end!"

"Of course I did!" she yelled. "It hurt too much! I wanted—"

He laughed. "Yeah, right." He gestured between them. "This, whatever the fuck it is, is over. I don't want you in my life anymore."

Starfire closed her eyes. All the fight drained out of her. "Acknowledged," she murmured.

Nightwing turned and stalked from the room. He ignored the looks from everyone, ignored how Raven jumped up and dashed into the room he'd just vacated. He stalked to the N-Wing and took his anger out in the sky.

It didn't occur to him until much later to ask Starfire about these so-called rules she mentioned, and by the time he remembered that little nuance, she was nowhere to be found.

She stopped attending Titan meetings, submitting her reports via Raven. He supposed he couldn't blame her for that. She stopped attending parties, or at least attending them in her Kory persona. At times he saw a strange woman chatting with Rachel like they were old friends. If she had to hide from him, he'd respect that. Appreciate it even.

The emails stopped. Everything stopped. No more contact at all. He hadn't realised how much he'd looked forward to her words. How much he relied on her to keep up to date about what was occurring within the Titans socially. To be cut from her life so completely…

It hurt but he'd asked for it. She gave it. Really, what had he expected?

Dick graduated with honours and went straight to the police academy in Gotham. He rented an apartment not too far away from the Manor so he'd still have access to the Batcave. He even had a girlfriend.

Life was good. He was… he wouldn't call himself happy. Content at least. Enjoying life.

Then Starfire exploded into the modelling world. She was everywhere, everywhere Dick looked and everywhere he turned there'd be a billboard with her on it or a magazine she was in. Lingerie was her photography forte (how could it not be?), but she really excelled at the catwalk. She did. Designers _loved_ her.

Seeing her made his heart ache. He'd thought he was over her.

While Starfire seemed to have everything going for her, Kory Anders, when Dick cared to look, had vanished. She'd completed her course with honours and then nothing. Not a pip of an appearance. No job. No bank account used. Nothing. She'd paid off her student loans in one fell swoop and disappeared.

He asked Raven one day and she gave him her patented 'you're a complete idiot' look. "Really, Dick?"

He shrugged and acted blasé, slowly stirring his coffee. "I'm curious."

She sighed and placed her tea cup back on the table in front of her. "Don't you think you should ask her?"

"We… don't talk."

"And whose fault is that?"

He chose not to answer. No one else knew the exact details of the friction between Dick and Starfire. He suspected Raven would have more information than others, but even then he doubted she knew what had occurred.

She stared at him for a long moment, then rose to her feet to leave. "Did you even consider who she created Kory Anders for?"

Raven's words troubled him for weeks.

It wasn't until his (available-to-non-superhero-friends) laptop got a virus (well, gee, what did Alvin use it for?) which forced him to go through his contacts to check no spam mail had been sent that he noticed.

Starfire had two email addresses and only one entry in his contact list. One email was registered to Kory, the other was Starfire.

It was the Starfire email address who sent the messages about her life. What was happening, how she was doing. The Kory email only ever sent details on the next party she was attending, whether or not she'd be in Gotham, or inquire as to whether or not he was attending the next Titan meeting. But because he'd listed both emails under the name of 'Star', his provider never separated the emails.

Looking over her emails as Starfire, he saw the heart and passion he always identified with her were still there in her words. The letters where much like they were when she'd visited Tamaran back before they were dating, just the right tone of friendship with a hint of more. It was only because they were mixed in with the Kory emails he never noticed how she'd separated herself. Lover and friend.

She'd split herself. He hadn't.

He'd been blind to a lot of things. He'd burnt the bridge between them. No going back.

His relationship with his girlfriend deteriorated, so he ended it. He hadn't really put his heart into it; he supposed that was one of the many reasons why it failed.

Instead, he concentrated on his police training, being Nightwing and fighting crime, and helping Bruce and Babs train up the new Robin, Tim.

Dick and Babs found good company in each other, sharing a meal at least once a week, more if they could. Babs was another reason his relationship failed, his ex didn't like the amount of time they spent together. She'd been convinced a lot of the 'sudden emergencies' where Dick ran off were because of Babs. Cheating claims had become the norm and Dick didn't have the investment in the relationship to try.

In a sense, the sudden emergencies involved Babs, but not because there was anything other than friendship between them.

Babs bustled into the café they were supposed to be having coffee at, late as usual.

"Busy day?" Dick asked, looking up from the newspaper.

"You'd think libraries would be a quiet place to work," she replied. "But nooooo, not in Gotham."

"Sudden rush on Twilight?" he teased.

She pulled a face at him. "Don't you have all four?"

"For winter," he replied, folding up the newspaper and placing it on the table. "Good starter fuel."

She laughed. Unhooking her bag, she threw the strap over the back of her seat, then draped her jacket over it. "How've you been?"

"Pretty good."

"How's…" Babs frowned and clicked her fingers. "Um…"

Dick rolled his eyes. "We broke up."

Babs looked surprised. "Really? I liked her."

"As evident by the lack of remembrance of her name."

"Oh, give me a break," she complained. "Did you order?"

"For me."

"Thanks so much," she said, tart as she lifted her finger to signal a waitress.

"I didn't know how much longer you'd be."

Babs rattled off her standing order for this particular café before giving her attention back to Dick. "Why'd you break up?"

He shrugged. "We wanted different things."

"Translation, she couldn't handle your double life."

"I'm beginning to doubt anyone really can."

"Except those who live it," Babs said with a nod.

He shrugged. "Pickings are pretty slim for those who live it too."

She kicked him under the table. "Thanks, _Dick_," she snarked, her tone clearly indicating the other meaning of the word.

"I didn't mean you," he protested, reaching under the table to rub his shin. "I only meant—"

"Like I'd date you anyway. Besides, I'm hanging up the cowl."

"So I heard. Why?"

"I figure between you, Tim and Bruce, you've got it covered."

"I'm not in Gotham much longer."

Babs leant forward and rested her elbows on the table, grabbing an opening Dick sensed she'd been waiting for. "Do you know who _is_ in Gotham?"

Dick raised an eyebrow, since it was a very poorly played grab. "Who?"

"Starfire."

Dick stomach dropped. "Oh?" he asked, managing to keep his tone level.

"We're having dinner on Tuesday. She's here for the Fashion Week."

"That's nice," he said, keeping his tone as even as possible and hoping she'd pick on the message he didn't want to talk about this.

"Do you want to come? I scored two tickets to opening night, you can be my plus one."

"Not my thing," he said and took a mouthful of coffee.

"Don't you want to even see her?"

Dick sighed. "Babs. Leave it."

"You really haven't been reading the social pages, have you?" she asked, nodding at the paper.

He frowned, glancing at it. "It's the _social_ pages."

"Uh-huh."

Curiosity got the better of him. "Why?"

"Apparently the odds are pretty high for Bruce to make a play on her."

"Like he would," Dick scoffed.

She fiddled with her napkin. "You and I both know there's a lot he would do to uphold that playboy image of his."

Dick paled. "He wouldn't."

Babs shrugged. "It wouldn't be the first time."

"You're evil, you know that."

She smiled. "That's been said."

Dick scrubbed a hand through his hair. "We haven't talked. Not since…"

"And whose fault is that? One of you needs to make the first move to fix this. And I don't think it'll be her."

"Why not? She started it."

She scowled at him. "Liar."

Dick had the decency to look ashamed.

"Do you want it fixed?" Babs asked.

Dick sighed. "I miss her friendship," he admitted.

"That's a good place to start then," Babs replied. "It's okay, I'll introduce you."

Dick laughed. "Like that's going to happen."

"All you have to do is show up. Bruce'll get the hint."

Dick puffed out a breath. "I don't even—"

"She asks after you," Babs said bluntly.

Surprise rocked through him. "She does?"

"'Course she does. This is _Starfire_. She's got one of the most forgiving nature's I know. You have to try. You'll never forgive yourself if you don't at least try. All you have to do is say hi and take it from there."

He nodded. "Alright fine. I'll be your plus one."


	5. Fashion Week

**Fashion week.**

Gotham never did anything by halves, not even Fashion week. It was glitzy, glamorous and full of style. Top designers from across America banded together to showcase their outfits and their models in the hopes of generating enough interest to cross the ocean into Paris.

There would be parties, after parties, after-after parties, rising sun breakfasts, bruncheons. Networking, agencies, meetings, photographers, contract signing, models roaming the streets. Everything the fashion elite could want.

The opening night was held in the Gotham City auditorium, which had been steadily transformed over the course of the week. More runways events and photography projects were scattered around the city and scheduled for later on in the week.

The theme for the Fashion week was natural duality. Night and day. Sun and moon. Desert and rainforest. Hot and cold.

Dick studied the program he'd brought with a sense of trepidation. "You'd think people who organise these sorts of events would realise the kind of villains who live in Gotham."

Babs rolled her eyes at him. "Two-Face is safely tucked away in Arkham."

"Yeah but _duality_? That really must have peaked his interest."

"Bruce isn't worried," Babs said, waving to the man as he took his seat by the catwalk edge.

Bruce acknowledged them both with a slight tilt of his head.

Dick knew better and leant closer to Babs so he could whisper in her ear. "'Course he is. He's wearing the automated suit beneath that."

Babs gave him a look then studied Bruce. "How can you tell?"

"Slight pinch at the base of the neck," Dick said.

"Are you suited?" Babs asked.

"Yup."

She huffed. "So much for a romantic, trouble-free night out."

Dick ignored that. "Add to that, I spy Tim over there."

Babs shifted. "Great. Now I feel significantly underdressed."

Dick allowed his eye to roam over her elegant dress. "I think you look beautiful."

Babs beamed.

"Did you hide a weapon in your cleavage?" he asked. "That dips very low."

"Yeah, well, a girl has to compete… hey! Are you checking out my boobs?"

"Maybe."

"Quit it," she said and whacked him with her program.

He snickered.

"What's with Flirty McFlirty tonight?"

He shuffled in his chair and folded his arms. "Nervous, I guess."

She shifted closer in her chair so she could wrap her hands around his upper arm and press their sides together. "Relax. What's the worst that can happen?"

He gave her a down the nose look. "I'm wearing my suit for protection because it's fireproof. Do you really have to ask?"

Babs, curse her, giggled.

The lights over the audience went out, the platform lit up, music echoed, and Fashion Week began.

"Ladies and gentlemen," a voice boomed over the top of the music.

"I've never been to one of these before," Dick said, leaning into Babs. "Is it always this flashy?"

She hugged his arm. "Isn't it brilliant?"

The outfits were incredible and (Dick considered) completely impractical. Bell shaped dresses, gaudy hats, structures and patterns which wouldn't work in any other setting except perhaps futuristic movies. Dresses which covered all and nothing, dresses which Dick wondered how the poor girls could actually move in and not cut themselves.

"It's like a circus performance on crack," Dick told Babs. The music and speaker were so loud he had to put his mouth right up to her ear to speak.

The models walked in pairs, their outfits the complete opposite of each other. One outfit was a metallic fortress of rigidity, the other was flowing silk. One's outfit was made to resemble a lioness, the woman who walked beside her reminded Dick of a rabbit.

Day and Night walked out, signalling one of the pivotal moments in the catwalk since their walk was a lot different and had more focus than most of the other models. The announcer for the evening detailed information regarding each dress, naming the designer and something about the outfit, finishing off by naming the models. Dick could tell immediately what the two women were supposed to be showcasing, even without the announcer. One, her oiled skin darkened to the colour of midnight with a metallic dress made from starlight. The other, bronzed, her dress a silken swathe of all the colours of the rainbow, trained and trailing in the breeze behind her as they walked.

Day and Night took position on separate podiums and remained on stage, changing stance every now and then.

"No Starfire yet," Dick said.

"Just wait," Babs replied.

The next big pair were Ocean and Land, their dresses designed to showcase their respective themes. Ocean's dress was made of something resembling scales, shining and shimmering in its splendour, while Land's outfit was a mixture of all the different biomes Earth contained.

More dresses and Dick became more and more bored with each pair which ended up on stage. He cast his eyes around the area, looking for signs of trouble, but the rapidly changing light and sound made it difficult to spot anyone who might be causing mischief or wasn't supposed to be somewhere because they weren't part of the crew.

The music changed and there was a flare of green.

Dick sat up straight in his seat. Babs clamped her hand down on Dick's wrist, for support or to hold him in his seat, Dick wasn't sure.

The Sun and the Moon. How could he have not known she'd represent the Sun. Her partner for the walk glided along the catwalk, her skin painted silver and a flowing dress to match while Starfire… her dress was barely there because it didn't need to be. It covered her torso, stopping at the top of her thigh and was scattered with yellow fringes which wafted around her like solar flares. She was golden. Fiery. Vine-like, delicate silver chains roped along her arms and legs. Attached to her shoulders were two poles flying long, streaming flags which had been made to look like flames.

He knew they played on her burning nature, she blazed down the catwalk, her feet not touching the ground and her eyes a solid green.

Despite her outfit though, whoever designed the two outfits they'd made it so she didn't over shadow her partner. They complemented each other, Starfire twisted around her Moon counterpart in such a way it made them seem like they revolved around each other, the woman so skilled at walking it was almost as though she floated herself.

"Man, that's one confident woman to be able to walk down there with Starfire," Babs mentioned.

Moon glided on a platform which was hoisted up into the air and Starfire floated up opposite her.

The models struck a pose and ceased moving. Moments later the lights went out.

The only evidence something was amiss was it took a few extra seconds for Starfire's eyes to dim.

Dick frowned. In the moments before the light vanished, Starfire's eyes seemed to be swaying, like the darkness had come too early and she looked around. Sudden darkness such as this was usually a ploy in performances to give the centre immediate attention, but no spotlight turned on there. Robbed of the bright lights, his eyes struggled to adjust and beside him Babs shifted.

The music continued on undaunted. Dick strained his ears as he tried to hear anything else.

There was a shout, a call of a distorted name and Starfire exploded into green.

Although Dick was blinded by the sudden flare, his eyes were quick to adjust. Someone in the audience just as good at readjusting their eyesight screamed.

Moon was being held at gunpoint by a masked man, wearing Two-Face's symbolical two toned hoodie.

Dick gave Babs an 'I-told-you-so' look as he and most of the audience rose to their feet.

Gun fire splattered, people in the crowd screaming and Dick felt himself pushed from behind as the people fled toward the stage. It was too late to act.

Two-Face's goons were scattered around the outside of the auditorium, forcing all the people watching to fall over chairs and squish together at the platform. Other goons were leaping up grabbing models to threaten.

Dick threw an arm around Babs under the visual pretence of protecting her when really he was handing off several birdarangs and a grappling hook. With a significant look to each other, they allowed the pushing and panicking crowd to separate them.

The lights came back on. "Ah my pet, you ruined my entrance."

Dick flicked his glance up to the catwalk to see Two-Face standing there. Half of him was dressed immaculately, as always, well groomed and in a grey suit. The other half, the acid scarred half, seemed to have taken a page out of the theme for this week's fashion. Loud in terms of brightness of colour, neon pink to be exact, pin-striped and utterly befitting of a split personality of Two-Face's nature. He wore a hat, one half grey and classy, the other matched the neon-pink of his suit and was topped off with a long peacock feather.

Starfire circled Two-Face, her eyes glowing. Dick knew from experience that she did this to hide where she was looking. He also noticed, her action of presenting a solid danger to Two-Face allowed him, Tim, Bruce and Babs to slip through the cowering crowd and spread out to cover more angles.

Dick caught Tim's eye across the room and nodded to him. Next, he spotted Babs, crouching behind a pillar, and repositioned himself in relation to her as much as he could since it was difficult to move through the huddled masses. Bruce didn't acknowledge him at all, somehow managing to get right up against the platform to use the side of it as cover. Dead in Starfire's sight.

"Two-Face, was it not?" Starfire asked, overly polite.

"Oh, you've heard of me," Two-Face said, suddenly all charm. The unscarred side turned toward her more to indicate who had greater control.

She inclined her head. "Indeed. What can we do for you?"

"It's my daughter's birthday," Two-Face said. His faced turned and he sneered, "Brat— Darling that she is," his unscarred side corrected, "I offered her a coin toss. Heads for a puppy, tails we crash Fashion Week."

Dick pulled a face and wished he could get free of the crowd so he could make a difference. His suit itched beneath his shirt.

"So, we hope you don't mind if darling Duela makes her debut upon the modelling world," Two-Faced continued, still oozing charm and civility as he turned toward the entrance of the catwalk expectantly.

"I do mind," Starfire snarled. "People have worked very hard on this project and you are ruining it."

Two-Face stopped and turned back to face her slowly. "I beg your pardon?"

She dropped one starbolt and gestured out among the crowd. "You are scaring all these good people. It is not right, regardless of your intentions, to scare others. You must cease this course of action immediately and turn yourself over to the authorities."

Two-Face leered, "You have a mouth on you, deary, voicing your opinion like I care. Refreshing for Gotham. Such a prize."

Her face twisted in anger. "You are hurting my friends," she snarled, lifting her chin to indicate the restrained Moon high on her podium, then looked toward the other models being threatened. "Release them. This is your only warning."

"My darling, I don't think you understand," Two-Face said and fixed the cuffs on his suit. He held up both his arms. "Look around. I have everyone surrounded. Everything is under my control. What can one little spitfire do?"

Dick, having mentally marked off his share of bad guys with guns to disarm with birdarangs when the moment came, turned to see if he could catch Starfire's eye and let her know she had allies in the crowd. More than just Batman.

Starfire landed and placed a hand on her cocked hip. "I have a better idea," she crooned, flirtatious.

Two-Face blinked. Twice. Alternating eyes. "You do?" he asked, his voice both rough and soothing.

Having been on the receiving end of Starfire's flirtation, Dick understood the reaction.

She walked toward him, swishing her hips with every movement. "Would you like to flip for it?"

A metallic flash as the legendary coin made an appearance. "The very height of civility, my dear," he said. "What is the wager?"

Starfire rested her hand against his chest. "Whether or not I catch you." She gripped and tossed him straight up in the air. "Troia!" she bellowed and started casting starbolts at those men detaining the models.

Hidden among the hunkering crowd, Dick launched his arsenal of smoke bombs, exploding discs and roped bolas at the men. By the sounds around him, Tim and Bruce would be doing the same, and Babs would be launching his birdarangs.

If he could panic the crowd, since most of the goons were in various stages of disarray, it would provide more confusion and get a lot of people to safely. He shoved at the two men in front of him to get them moving. "Run!"

The crowd surged toward the exit and Dick had no choice but to follow. It was too thick to get clear.

Someone flew overhead. "This way! Everyone go!"

Dick glanced up, grinning as Donna led the charge to get people to safety. Looking over his shoulder, he saw most of the models were on their way to freedom and Starfire getting into position to catch the freefalling Two-Face. Beyond her, Moon was making her escape back down the runway.

Babs careened into him, driven by the crowd and Dick wrapped his arm around her to keep them together.

Up on the podium, Two-Face screamed.

* * *

**_Author's Note:_**_ Bear in mind, my Two-Face (as in the actor I always identify with the character) is Tommy-Lee Jones from Batman Forever. Just as my Riddler will always be Jim Carey._

_Oh. Duela... she's said to be the daughter of soooo many villains in DC comics, starting with Joker's daughther. She's also Catwoman's daughter, Riddler's daughter, etc. She likes to claim parentage all over the place. Her legitamate father is Two-Face though (Duela Dent is Harvey Dent's daughter). _

_Donna is one of those who, like Starfire, has no secret identity (just an alternative name). Everyone knows Donna is Troia (aka Wonder Woman's 'sister' for those who don't know her). _


	6. Chance

**Author's Note:**_I just realised how sloppy I can be when writing fanfiction. Lack of complete character backgrounds when introducing or going into indepth character thoughts or explanations. I'll tell you why that is. It's not because I don't care about the story. It's because I've done it so many times its tedious and repedative and something I think should be common Titan knowledge. Because its fanfiction, you expect the reader to already know the character and the world and can just get on with the story. So unless I've drastically changed something there's no reason to explain it. _

_Its odd how differently you write between your own work and fanfiction. The mindset I go through. Fanfiction I tend to treat as fun. I let things slide more. Thought it would be interesting to share._

_Also, for those of you who follow both Katergator and myself, her final chapter to One Thing Leads to Another is coming. She's had real life issues to deal with which haven't been condusive to writing. Please be patient and stop hassling her, every time you do that (to most authors) it messes with inspiration. We don't get paid for this. If we did, then you could hassle us._

* * *

**Chance**

Babs tugged Dick's jacket tighter around her as they lingered outside the auditorium. Dick rubbed his hands up and down her arms to keep her warmer. Police were allowing them back in in groups to collect their belongings, but the wait was pretty long. Unless you were Bruce Wayne, but he managed to escape without leaving any belongings behind. Playing the "I'm the commissioner's daughter" hadn't worked for Babs this time, they had a couple of cops who were sticklers for the rules.

So they waited. The line shuffled forward. More people left. More shuffling. Police moving up and down the line took statements from people. Dick and Babs listened to rumours from people around them, made a few of their own claiming they had seen Nightwing and Batman in the gloom.

"We can come back tomorrow," Dick said, watching Babs as she breathed into her hands and rubbed them together to warm them. The temperature had been dropping steadily and while Dick had the luxury of his Nightwing suit beneath his clothes, Babs didn't.

"My coat had my key in it."

"You can stay with me," Dick suggested.

"We waited this long already. I'm fine."

Dick rolled his eyes. "You're not," he said, wrapping his arms around Bab's shoulders and tugging her into his chest so she could use his body warmth.

She sighed, buried her face in his shirt and tucked her arms into her chest. "Hmm."

"Silly girl. I'll take you out for a coffee after."

"Hmm… sounds good."

The press near the police barrier went nuts as Starfire and Donna slipped by it. Babs turned her head, remaining snuggled against his chest, as they watch Starfire answer a few questions. Starfire was out of her sun suit now, dressed normally in jeans and a T-shirt, ignoring the chill of the air, while Donna was wearing clothes more suited, a large red overcoat over her jeans.

"Do you want to make yourself known?" Babs asked.

Dick watched Starfire, amazed at the ease with which she dealt with the press. Nerve took hold and all he wanted to do was avoid. "No… no. I'm good."

Donna, who stood patiently off to the side while Starfire dealt with the press, scanned the crowd of people still waiting. Her face brightened as she saw him. Checking Starfire was still occupied, she took a step toward him then halted, frowning at the bundle of cold woman he held.

Dick, knowing Donna probably thought he was holding his date for the evening, mouthed, '_Babs'_.

Permission to engage, Donna bounded over. "Dick! Hi!"

He grinned. "Hey Donna."

"What are you doing here?" she asked. "What's wrong with Babs?"

"We were in the audience," Dick explained.

Donna pulled a face. "Ooh, tough break."

"Babs left her jacket inside. Her keys are in her jacket."

Donna gauged the line they were in, glanced back at Starfire, then gestured. "Well, c'mon. I've got a pass, we'll go get it."

"What about Star?" Babs asked, peeking out from Dick's chest.

Donna waved her hand dismissively and then tugged them out of the queue. "She'll probably be there for a while."

"Thank you, thank you," Babs gushed, hurrying after Donna.

Dick looked at Donna and Babs and back at Starfire. "Should I—" he began, gesturing the group of press.

"C'mon Dick," Donna called as she waited at the barrier for him.

Knowing Starfire probably wouldn't leave without Donna he followed meekly.

The state of the auditorium showed the haste at which people fled. Chairs were upturned, programs scattered the floor, belongings left behind. Police escorted several groups of people through to get their gear, most of the officers glanced their way as they entered.

Dick thrust his hands into his pockets and watched from the top of the stairs as Babs bustled off to her seat for her coat.

Donna linked her arm through his. "So, how've you been?"

He smiled. "Good."

"Did you know the drama was going to happen tonight?" Donna asked, tilting her head. "Is that why you're here?"

"Had no idea," Dick said with a shrug. "Although—" he chuckled. "'Duality'? Yeeaaah, I can see why Two-Face came."

Donna giggled. "Yeah."

"You part of the photography team?"

"Star's personal."

"She gets her own?"

She hugged his arms. "For this week, yes. I get to photograph her all around town and submit my photos to the board at the end. Something about every day in Gotham life."

Babs bounded back up to them, wearing her jacket. "Ahh, so much better," she said, handing Dick's dress jacket to him. "Thanks, but that's really not very warm."

"It's supposed to be dashing, not warm," Dick laughed.

"You always did dashing very well," Donna said. "We really need to catch up while I'm in town."

"What about now?" Babs said as they headed back outside. "Dick promised me a coffee. There's a late night coffee shop around the corner from my place."

"Oh," Donna said, concerned. "I really shouldn't. Star—"

Dick held the door open for the girls. "She probably doesn't want to see me."

"Oh, Dick, it's not that," Donna said, hasty. "We're very busy in the morning, there's a photo shoot on the bay at dawn followed by lunch with her agent and another walk tomorrow night. Fashion week tends to be a full week of work and—"

"What is _he_ doing here?"

Dick's feet were suddenly leaden.

Starfire's eyes bored into his, keeping him frozen. "Why am I not surprised to see you," she snarled, her body language showing she was primed to defend her actions. "I have permission to be in Gotham, you do not need to grill me on my conduct—"

Babs interrupted, in a loud voice. "Star, I don't believe you've met—"

Starfire's teeth clicked and she looked at Babs, who flashed her eyes to the left quickly. Press. They were listening.

"This is my chaperone for the evening, Dick Grayson. He's an old, if stupid, friend of mine. Dick, this is Starfire."

Caught in a trap, he held out his sweaty hand. "Hi, it's a pleasure."

Starfire looked at his hand, then back up at him and ignored the social protocol.

Babs continued undaunted, "He's here 'cause I invited him. Free tickets, remember?"

Starfire's eyes twitched before she relaxed and released Dick from the accusing gaze to smile at her friend. "Babs, it is glorious to see you."

Babs grinned and hugged Starfire tight. "It's great to see you."

"Oh, I am so glad you did come. I looked for you but it is most hard with those lights."

"It's fine," Babs said.

Starfire's eyes flicked to meet Dick's and away just as fast.

"You were awesome," Babs said and took a step back from Starfire, although she kept her hand on Starfire's arm. "Both in the walk and dealing with Two-Face."

Starfire's laugh was nervous. "Except for the broken leg."

"Hey, the dude was kicking and screaming and being a big baby, you did your best," Donna corrected. "Nobody else was hurt and the day was saved. What more could you ask for?"

"We were talking about going for coffee," Babs said. "But Donna said that wouldn't be a good idea."

"Oh, um…" Another fleeting look at Dick. He could see how uncomfortable she was.

"I'll, um… just go wait by the car," Dick said, taking the hint. "Bye Donna, it's nice seeing you again."

Donna looked stricken, her eyes bouncing between Dick and Starfire. "Oh um—"

Dick held Starfire's gaze, then walked away.

"What was he doing here?" he heard Starfire hiss moments before he left earshot.

Babs soothed, "I'm sorry, I thought—"

Dick sighed and kicked a small stone, before ducking beneath the police tape. He thrust his hands into his pockets and hunched his shoulders as he walked. He wasn't surprised at her reaction, perhaps startled by the vehemence in her voice, but not surprised. He really didn't know why he expected it to be any different. They'd split on less than amicable terms, why would he assume she'd be happy to see him.

Climbing into his car, a gift from Bruce on his twenty-first, he put the heater on so Babs wouldn't be cold when she got here. He then beat his head against the steering wheel a couple of times and called himself an idiot.

"I'm so sorry," Babs said as she slid into her seat ten minutes later. "I thought—"

"It's fine," he lied. "Really."

"Dick—"

"It doesn't matter," he said, checking the mirrors before he reversed. "Let's get you home."

Later that night, after a few sorrow drowning drinks, Dick drafted an email he would never send.

_Star,_

_There are a lot of things I'm sorry for. There are a lot of things I should have said when we were together and I didn't. Things I still can't admit to you now. _

_Like thanks. Thanks for the memories. We had some brilliant ones over the years. Like the time we went to Tamaran and you had to explain the different toilets to Gar and you did it in such a matter-of-fact way Cy and I had a laugh at BB's expense. Or the time the five of us went to Mexico and you didn't have to kiss anyone to learn the language because you'd already gotten it from me. Or when you and I went skiing for the first time, remember that? Lying by the fire and I taught you to make smores and you sang some of your folk lore songs?_

_I should have listened to them better. You were always so willing to share your culture with us, I guess, I forgot that someone needs to share ours with you._

_I won't pretend I didn't hurt you. I did. Sometimes deliberately. I won't pretend you didn't hurt me. You did and I wonder sometimes if that wasn't deliberate too._

_We're older and wiser now. I look back on the time we spent together with fondness, not bitterness. You were a big part of me and I'm thankful you helped shaped the man I became. _

_A man who can admit his mistakes to a machine and not the girl who deserves to know._

_I'm sorry for a lot of things. We should have communicated better over the friends-with-benefits. That's where it all went wrong. We should have made ground rules, we should have made sure we both got out of it what we wanted. But we didn't and I know some of that is my fault. I've often wondered about the 'rules' you mentioned because we never set any. It troubles me where you might have gotten them from, what you may have misunderstood. We should have talked more. About us. I'm sorry I didn't._

_Donna and Babs, they don't know what we did to each other. They don't understand. Can't understand because it didn't happen to them. We were so tangled up, so out of sync with each other and it ended wrong. I'm not surprised by the reaction you had when you saw me today. I was very angry last time we spoke, said some things I shouldn't've. I can't expect you to be okay with that. _

_I understand. I think that's what I want to say. I understand why you'd hate me now. I understand you don't want to see me. I'll respect that and stay away. _

_I'm going to Bludhaven soon. My police training is finalised in a month and I'll be moving to join the force. I'll have a few years on the beat then join homicide. I've already got an apartment in the city which I'll be moving into and I'm making final modifications to the NightWatch alert system I'll be running under. I'm looking forward to moving on._

_If you were ever in Bludhaven I'd like to think you'd look me up but I know you won't. There's too much anger and pain between us now. _

_Things never work out the way we planned. _

_I just wanted you to know I was sorry. _

_Have a good life, Star. You deserve it._

_-Dick_


	7. Wingman

**Wingman **

Dick successfully avoided Fashion Week until Thursday night when Alvin forced his way into Dick's apartment.

"C'mon, we're going out!" Alvin blurted as he breezed through Dick's small living area on the way to the bedroom.

Dick looked up from his slouch on the couch with his computer. "No, we're not."

"Dude," Alvin said, tossing several 'rejected' clothing from Dick's bedroom in a dramatic display. The Nightwing suit was never kept with his normal clothes, nor even any place Alvin would be able to find so it didn't matter when Alvin went through his things like this. "Party downtown. We're going. I need a wingman."

"Busy."

"Like hell you are," Alvin said. "Get back on the horse."

"Dude, I've been—"

"Babs doesn't count."

"I've had two dates—"

Alvin poked his head out of the bedroom. "Names."

"Donna and Rachel." He'd gone out with them both in the past week so it wasn't a total lie. Alvin didn't need to know the 'dates' were friendship based. Since he'd never heard the names before, he wasn't likely to ask questions.

"Get some?"

Dick made a rude gesture.

"Come with me tonight and I'll make sure you will."

"I'm not going out."

"I'll say it."

Dick stared at him. "You wouldn't."

"I would."

"Alvin—"

Alvin leered and held up his hand, one finger raised as he prepared to count off the words. "New…"

"Stop."

"Mexico…"

Dick groaned. "Dude, that's not fair. How long are you going to hold that against me?"

Alvin grinned. "Get in the shower. And shave that mess of a face."

Dick grumbled, but did what he was told.

Alvin forced him into a completely black suit, with the only splash of colour contained within the red tie. Good wingman clothes, Dick supposed, with Alvin dressed in complementing shades of blue, with an open collar and no tie.

"So, where are we going?" Dick asked as he was bundled into Alvin's Mazda.

"Did you know it was Fashion Week?" Alvin said in a rhetorical tone. "Models, dude. There's models everywhere."

"Who are all working too hard to try for a one night stand," Dick reasoned. "Dude, do you know what those girls go through in a week like this? They'd be networking, not looking for a lay."

"Maybe. But I know where one of the parties is at tonight. Even if there's no hook up, there's lots of pretty girls to look at. And wingman, dude. Wingman at a model's party. You're not getting stuck with some—"

"I get the idea." Dick rolled his eyes. He knew there were plenty of parties around Gotham every night. The chance of Starfire being at this one was pretty slim, but he was never one to play the odds. Fate always worked against him.

If she was there… he'd give her space. He would. This was her arena, not his, it wasn't right to take away what she'd worked so hard at. If his presence was detrimental, he'd leave, regardless of wingman status.

As it turned out… as the fates had deemed it, it was _Starfire's_ party. Not hers, specifically, but the agency she worked for.

He realised too late when they arrived at the penthouse apartment atop the Hilton, when Alvin knocked on the door, waved his invitation in a manner that was far too pompous and placed it directly in Starfire's hands. "Greetings, my good lady," Alvin announced. "My name is Alvin Colon, I work for Her Honour Mayor Granger, who is helping to fund Fashion Week, and this is my good friend Dick Grayson."

Starfire raised an elegant eyebrow. "Greetings." She opened the door further. "And welcome."

Alvin tapped Dick on the chest and waltz inside. "See? Told you. C'mon then."

Dick hesitated, taking in everything about Starfire. She looked glamorous in her elegant lavender dress. Her hair was pinned back, gathered against her head, a shame Dick thought privately. The pinned hair did expose her diamond adorned neck and ears which he was sure were real since she was probably modelling them for a client. "If this isn't okay, I can leave."

She looked at him and then beyond. "When did my feelings become your concern?" she asked. "You have an invite."

"Star—"

"Please, I bid you welcome," she said, sounding bored.

"If you're not comfortable…"

Her vague expression vanished and she focused on him. After a brief study she said, "I knew you would be in Gotham. I was prepared to see you."

"That doesn't mean this is easy. I can leave—"

Confusion drifted across her features, then she gave him a tiny smile, a far cry from her usual Starfire smiles, but it was still a smile. "Alvin is waiting for you," she prompted.

"Dick, c'mon," Alvin called and waved his hand at Dick.

He ducked his head and slipped by Starfire. "Sorry."

"That one needs to lay off the fake tan," Alvin said, as he scoped the floor.

Dick snorted.

It was a nice party, for Alvin anyway. Lots of networking and pretty ladies. Dick did his wingman duty as best he could, even though his heart wasn't in it. He talked and chatted and was charming and interesting when Alvin needed although it was just a character, a part he played for the audience.

Dick had always been good at playing for the audience.

He wondered where Donna was, but noticing the absence of any photographers he assumed this wasn't part of her job for the week. She was probably getting some well-earned sleep.

Some of the models were interesting, they all had stories about each other, or stories about the job. Walks gone wrong or funny photo shoots. Some were more interested in talking about diets or exercise routines. Some were interested in giving him their dimensions, thinking he was some sort of agent.

One model, who called herself Kharma, took a particular interest in him. She was nice, Dick supposed. Elegant. But she rubbed him the wrong way. Something about her didn't sit well with him. Some of the things she said were just that little bit off, he couldn't quite put his finger on what it was about her that bugged him.

She insisted on touching him, a hand to his arm as she laughed just that little bit too loud at one of his jokes which were really not that funny. Her fingers gripped his biceps and she cooed about hidden muscles.

By then Alvin had… not exactly hooked up… but had chosen which of the models he would lavish his attention on for the evening so Dick was relieved of his wingman obligations. As soon as Kharma was distracted, he raided the small table of food for a plate and made his escape. The penthouse balcony had a bricked garden in the corner which was easy enough to scramble up for someone like him so he could hide on the relative quiet of the roof.

He wandered over to the far edge, away from the eyes of those who might be on the balcony, and picked out one of the sandwiches he'd stolen. It was halfway to his mouth when he noticed.

Starfire stared at him, seated in the air a short distance away and nursing her own overfilled plate of food. Her lavender dress fluttered in the night time breeze, giving her celestial appeal.

"Ahh…" he lowered the sandwich down to his plate. "Sorry. Didn't know."

Starfire raised an eyebrow at him. Her eyes drifted down to his plate and she laughed.

Relaxing, Dick couldn't help but smile. "We have the same idea it seems."

"Escaping to eat?" She unhooked her legs and floated down to the roof top to stand a small distance away. "_X'hal_, those girls never simply enjoy their food. I am always so hungry around them."

"Probably comes from having nine stomachs," Dick mentioned.

She nodded. "They always make me feel like I have committed such the great crime if I 'indulge'. Some of them do not mind as much, but there is always one who is so vocal about watching the calories and eating the rabbit food."

Dick snorted. "You were never one for rabbit food." He took a bite from his sandwich and chewed thoughtfully. After he swallowed, he said, "There's a good steak restaurant around the corner—"

Instant frown. "No."

He continued undaunted. "It's called Char Restaurant. They have those King Steak deals, you know, where if you eat the whole thing you get your face on the wall. I was just going to suggest you check it out while you're in town."

The frown slipped to apology. "Oh…"

"I think Vic's the last person who beat the deal."

"Oh."

Dick took another bite, watching her as he chewed. "I wasn't asking."

She shifted, uncomfortable. "No, I... hmmm…"

"Awkward, right?"

"A little." She considered him. "Although, truly, I did not expect you to be so…"

"So what?"

"Civil."

He shuffled. "I think I owe you civility at least—"

"You do not owe me anything," she snapped.

Dick dropped his eyes and tried again. "You look great, by the—"

"Do not."

His teeth clicked from the haste he shut his mouth.

Starfire sighed. "I apologise. I just… I cannot…"

"I understand."

"Do you?"

"I know this isn't easy for you," Dick said. "It's not any easier for me. I didn't come here to make things harder for you."

"I know. You are here because Alvin wished for it."

"Yeah. Look… um… you don't have to talk to me. Or acknowledge me. Or anything. I'm not asking you to. I thought you were amazing on Sunday, against Two-Face. I think you're amazing at being a model, it really suits you."

Starfire watched him. "You and every other male of your species. You like the undergarment magazines."

He sensed a hint of a joke in her voice so he smiled. "I… just wanted to say I'm sorry, that's all."

She stiffened. "Okay."

They dropped into another uncomfortable silence and filled it by eating their stolen food.

Starfire chewed on her sandwich thoughtfully. When she finished her plate, she placed it on the awning of the roof and stood there, looking out into the night. "Is Sam bothering you?"

"Sam?" Dick asked.

"Kharma."

"Oh. _Her_."

A flash of a smile. "Yes. Her."

He shrugged. "I can handle it. Had my share of women throwing themselves at me."

"Do you want her?" Starfire asked.

He laughed. "I have standards," he said, trying to alleviate the tension. He was surprised she even noticed what was going on, but then he'd been aware of her actions most of the night too.

She flashed him an unreadable glance. "Do you want any of them? Do you welcome any advance?"

The smile died and he thrust his hands into his pockets. She was being serious. "No."

She sighed and reached up to unpin a small broach on her dress, so small it blended in with the beaded corset. Looking at it for a moment, she held it out. "If you wish the flirting to cease, pin this to your collar."

Crossing the distance between them, he cupped his hand under hers in a way she could drop the pin without touching him. "What is it?"

"It does not _mean_ anything," she snapped and Dick got the sense her anger was from nerves more than anything. "But it will stop them."

"Okay."

She dropped the pin and took a step back. Picking up the plate she said, "It was… nice to see you again."

"Yeah," he said, feeling the weight of the small broach in his hand. "You too."

The pin did the trick. The models in the party stopped flirting with him, their conversations steered toward more professional aspects of their lives. Kharma gave him a very disgruntled look when she next saw him sporting the pin, but the flirting stopped.

The whispering started though. Contemplative looks when they thought he wasn't looking. He overheard a pair of girls mention, "She never marks anyone."

The other one said, "I thought she was married."

"Perhaps she's finally found someone she's willing to cheat with."

"Dude," Alvin said, his hand thumping down on his shoulder. "Isn't this party amazing?"

Dick shrugged. "It's all right."

"Dick! You got pinned. Congrats. Looks like we both scored tonight."

Seeing a similar broach pinned on the collar of Alvin's jacket, Dick nodded. Now he understood why Starfire had given him this pin and why she'd been so firm in saying it didn't mean anything. Still, he was thankful for her generosity and wondered what repercussions might come because of it.

"My lady's leaving soon. You all right to get home by yourself?"

"Sure," Dick said, thankful. Alvin leaving meant he could leave too.

He lingered a little while, trying to make it seem he wasn't running away, before he left the party. As he pushed the button to call the elevator, Starfire said, "To anyone else, it would seem we are following each other."

He turned and offered her a smile. "It does seem that way."

"May I share your elevator?" she asked.

"Should we risk it?" Dick asked, trying to joke. "Knowing our fates, the mechanism would probably break and we'll get stuck there together."

She got the joke. "I would rescue you."

"Then, I'd be honoured," he said.

They occupied opposite corners. Dick didn't think it was possible to get any further away from each other.

"You're not wearing the jewellery," Dick noted.

Starfire touched her neck. "No. I had to return it."

"Modelling it?"

"Yes."

"I never pegged you for a model."

She smiled. "In truth, I wanted to get as far away from what you wished for me as possible. It was either this or the porn star."

He gulped.

"I am joking," she murmured. "Mostly."

He watched the numbers decreasing as they descended. "Can I ask where you're staying?"

"Hotel Pennyworth."

Dick laughed. "Really?"

She beamed, the first true Starfire smile he'd seen. "Yes. He insisted. The moment he found out I would be in Gotham, he called me. He would not take no for an answer. Truly it is lovely seeing him again."

"Good, he'll look after you."

"We have been spending most of my free time perfecting the cake of cheese recipe."

"Oh, yum."

Her smile slowly faded. The elevator dinged the first floor and he waited until she was out before he trailed after her.

As she reached the exit door to the building, he said, "I was a jerk."

She paused. "I fail to recall an instant this evening where your behaviour was reminiscent of being a jerk."

He held the exit door open for her. "I didn't mean tonight. I meant back at the Tower."

Hesitating, she filed outside and murmured, "Not a jerk, you were young. As was I."

"Being young isn't an excuse for my behaviour."

"Nor is being naive."

They stood side by side at the road side, not looking at each other but nor did he try to hail a taxi or Starfire fly away. "I think—"

"You were justified."

"Was I?" he asked, sceptical. "I don't see how I could've been."

She sighed. "This is not the correct place for this conversation."

"No, perhaps not. But I have the feeling if we don't start, we'll never do it."

She considered that, her lips pressed together. "Would it be such a bad thing if we never mentioned it?"

As much as Dick wanted that too, he said, "Hard to move past something if you never talk about it."

"Talking about it would imply the need to continue any sort of relationship," Starfire said.

"And you don't want that," he deadpanned, trying to hide the hurt.

"You were the one who insisted I was not to have any part in your life."

"I was wrong."

She allowed those words to float between them for a moment then shook her head. "Regardless, I do not wish to have this conversation with you at this juncture."

"Starfire—"

"Why?" she asked, looking at him. "Why can you not leave me alone?" She blinked rapidly, like she was blinking back tears, looked beyond him and turned her face away. "I need to go."

"I want to-"

"_Want_?" she asked, her voice trembling upon hysteria.

"Would like," he amended. "Humbly request a chance to talk to you."

She stared at him, then again behind him and he sensed they had an audience. "No," she said. "Sometimes things cannot be fixed. Accept it."

Dick's cell chimed.

"Goodbye, Dick," she said and walked into the night.

He sighed, consoling himself at least he tried and reached into his breast pocket for his phone. He had to respect her decision. "Hello?"

"Dick, it's Tim."

"Hey little bro, what's—"

"Babs has been shot. It's bad."

Dick's world spiralled.

* * *

_**Author's Note:** Let the angst begin._

_The broaches. Hmm... there are some modelling agencies... less... professional perhaps... anyway there are some agencies which double as prostitution houses. It does happen. The broaches are the used to say which model has been paid for for the evening etc so other models don't need to lavish attention on the man/woman. In other places, such as this one, the broaches have been adapted to mean something else (like who is going home with who by choice).  
_


	8. Broken

**Broken**

Dick's tie had been undone hours ago and left to hang. His jacket draped over the chair beside him. The sleeves of his black shirt were rolled up. Nails chewed to calm shattered nerves, the floor already paced incessantly and told to stop and there was still no news.

"She's in surgery." "We'll know more soon." "I'll see what I can find out." Three of the most common things said while he waited.

Commissioner James Gordon sat a few seats down, taking turns with Dick to pace or bother the nurses. He muttered to himself on occasion, frustrated words about the lack of news.

The clock loudly ticked off the seconds until Dick'd next approach the desk and ask for news.

It was just the two of them. No one else was allowed to wait. Dick was one of Babs' oldest friends, Gordon had acknowledged his want to wait in the hospital with a nod to the nurses, but everyone else was turned away.

Which was just as well, it wasn't like Bruce Wayne waiting would be appropriate, he and Babs didn't have anything to do with each other socially, other than Dick being one of her best friends. And Gordon didn't know Babs was Batgirl.

There were moments, like this one, were Dick did wonder if he knew but had been keeping it a secret. If Gordon knew who they all were.

God, he'd almost lost her, still might lose her and what by everything holy was taking them so long? Was that a good sign? A bad sign? It was definitely a bad sign. She could be dying and he didn't know. If she was dying, why weren't they doing anything? What if she _died_? What was he going to do if he lost her? If he lost her and he never had a chance to—

Dick's phone chimed, indicating a text message. Dick stared at it for a long time before the words made any sense to him. _Starfire has contacted Raven. She's returning from Azarath. ETA, one hour. Joker contained. _

When the surgeon finally arrived, his expression was grave.

"I'm sorry," he began.

Dick didn't hear much of what was being said, he was too shocked. The words "permanent spinal damage" and "may never walk again" rang in his ears. Mostly, he just held onto Gordon as the man broke.

TTTTT

Dick and Commissioner Gordon rarely left Babs side as she drifted in and out of consciousness over the next few days. She still didn't comprehend the scope of her injuries, the drugs she was on making it hard for her to understand anything.

People came to visit her. Starfire and Donna brought flowers and some items from her home she might want when she woke properly. Donna hugged him tight, saying if he needed anything, if Babs needed anything, just to call. Starfire, her eyes filled with tears of compassion and veiled by awkwardness, came to visit as often as she was able. Sometimes Dick would leave to give her privacy with a mostly incoherent Babs, others they just existed together and watched her sleep.

Tim visited. Alfred visited. Babs' co-workers from the library visited, offering their condolences. People rallied around her, showing her their love and support.

Raven came in her civilian hologram, quietly holding Babs' hand while Gordon fetched a rare cup of coffee and had something to eat. "I'm sorry," she said after a while. "I can increase the healing speed of tissue to the wound, but regenerating a spinal cord is beyond my capabilities." She stretched across the bed and took Dick's hand. "I'm so sorry."

Dick closed his eyes.

TTTTT

"Never?" Her voice was nothing but a raspy, distended whisper.

Dick pressed his lips to her fingers.

"We don't know, sweetheart," Gordon murmured, cupping Babs' other hand reverently. "The doctors aren't sure."

"But I can _feel_ them."

Dick and Gordon shared a look and Dick decided to answer this one. "The doctors say its phantom pain. Your brain thinks you should feel them, so it's… pretending."

Babs eyes filled with water. "Pretending?"

Dick pressed his lips into a thin line.

"There's nothing we can do?" Babs asked, looking Dick in the eyes and he knew what she was asking.

He shook his head.

The tears spilled over. "No. No. Dick, _no_," she wailed.

"I'm so sorry."

"This isn't fair." She glared at her feet, tucked away beneath the blanket to keep warm. "Move. MOVE DAMN YOU!"

For a moment, Dick thought her toes would wiggle out of sheer endurance and Babs' unending confidence, but her feet remained still.

"Babs, honey," her father murmured, stroking her arm. "You'll hurt yourself."

"There's nothing to _hurt_!" she screamed and her hand clenched around Dick's. "Why aren't they moving?!"

Dick tried to console her as well. "Babs—"

"Dick, make 'em move."

His heart broke and his eyes filled with tears. "I can't."

Her head whipped towards her father. "Daddy, _please_."

Gordon was openly crying. "Sweetheart—"

"I've been good," Babs cried, her upper body now straining with effort. "I've paid my dues. I don't deserve this! _MOVE_!"

"Dick, get the doctor," Gordon said, standing up to hold Babs' shoulders to the bed. "Honey, you're going to do yourself some real damage, you've got to calm down."

"Leave me alone!" she screamed. "Let me go!"

Dick bolted for the door.

TTTTT

They kept Babs sedated after that. Enough to keep her pliable and to allow her stomach to heal. Every day the doctors decreased the dose, giving her snatches of moments to come to terms with what happened to her. Physiatrists and physiotherapists were called to aid in getting Babs moving again. Therapists visited to help her understand what was occurring. To help her deal.

Dick remained at her side as much as possible, often sleeping on the chair in her room. Between the police academy and minimal patrolling he was exhausted, but he wouldn't let Babs deal with this by herself.

She tried to be strong, tried to face everything which came her way with the strength and confidence he'd always admired about her. The doctors thought she was doing well. The therapists complimented her steadfast attitude. Visitors were excited by how well she looked each time they visited.

In the dead of night, he'd hear her tears and feel her pain. He'd climb into the bed beside her and take her in his arms and hold her until she slept. And then hold her some more. Her clinginess in the restful hours were the only weakness she allowed herself to have.

TTTTT

"We're outfitting your apartment," Dick said. "Hand holds and ramps. We had an automated book case installed for all your books. Most of it is already done, just a few finishing touches. It'll all be ready by the time you get out of here. The doctors said later on this week, didn't they?"

Babs nodded. Today had been one of her bad days, Dick could tell the moment he walked into the room. She looked tired, sitting up as she stared incessantly at her feet as though she was willing them to move. "Yeah. Later on this week. And then everything goes back to _normal_."

"Babs—"

"I know, I know, look at the pros instead of the cons. It's tough to be positive all the time."

"You don't have to be positive all the time," he soothed. "You just have to approach every day with the fierce determination I know is in you."

She sighed.

"It won't win," Dick continued. "Things'll be different and hard for a while but it won't win. You'll adapt."

"I know. I _know_."

"You have so many people who care about you, Babs. Like, Bruce. He's footing the bill for a new supercomputer for you as well as specialised gym equipment. He wants to know if you'd like a personalised trainer to help you out."

Babs blinked and raised her head. "Bruce is? What for?"

Dick shrugged. "Whatever you might need. You know Bruce." Bruce's idea of consolement was to try and get her back into the saddle as quickly as possible. Even if she never donned the cape again, Bruce knew she wouldn't be happy from the sidelines. He was trying in his subtle way to give her options. As he told Dick, there was nothing wrong with Babs' mind.

"How you swing that with my dad?" she asked.

Dick chuckled. "Told him funding came from a mysterious donor. He didn't ask too much. He's been busy looking at hands-only cars."

She grumbled. "You're babying me."

That was true, but it was hard not to. "You've got a tough journey ahead of you," Dick said. "We're trying to make the transition easier."

With a heavy sigh, she lamented, "What have I got to offer now? What good is a disabled superhero?"

"Oh, no, sweetheart," Dick said, leaning forward on his chair to cup her cheek. "You have _so_ much to offer. Don't be disheartened."

She placed her hand over the top of his and closed her eyes. "It's just so hard."

"I know."

"I don't know what I'm going to do."

His heart went out to her. "I'll be here with you, every part of this journey. You're not alone."

A sudden heat to her face as she opened her eyes. "You're going to Bludhaven soon."

"Not if you don't want me to." His thumb stroked her cheek.

"What do you mean?" she asked, bewildered.

He leant forward and kissed her. Kissed her in a different way than friendship, his lips lingering on hers. Kissed her in a way he hoped she would recognise as a stirring of changing feelings, a shift in their relationship.

He'd almost lost her. Almost let her slip through his fingers. He wasn't going to let that happen again. Through the panic, the pain and the uncertainty of it all, he'd come to realise what she'd meant to him and was determined to show her.

His other hand came up to cup her other cheek. Her hand felt hot against his chest, before it buried into his hair to hold him closer and encourage.

He _encouraged_.

She hummed, a soft croon, before she tugged his face away from hers. Licking her lips, she laughed and brushed her nose against his. "I've been waiting a long time for you to do that."

He chuckled and went back for more but she turned her face away.

"No."

"No? Did I hurt you?" he asked, concerned and his hand hovered over her stomach.

"No." She licked her lips again. "No, as in I'm going to do something stupid."

Dick sat back down, disappointed. His hands slid from her face and she caught one of them to hold.

"Three things," she said, holding up her other hand. "Three reasons why we shouldn't do this."

"Only three?" he asked. Three reasons, from a girl who could name a hundred, three was important.

"One…" she gestured herself. "The timing is wrong. Completely wrong. I need to concentrate on finding myself, determining who I am, what I can do. Coming to terms with it. It's the wrong time to start a relationship, especially with someone like you."

He conceded that point with a snort.

"Two, you're going to Bludhaven. It's your dream. You've wanted that for years. I'm not going to let you give that up."

"That's my decision, don't you think?"

She ignored that. "Three, you're still in love with Starfire."

Dick's jaw clicked, he closed his mouth so fast.

"Don't try and deny that. I know." She didn't sound accusatory, just resigned.

"It's possible to love more than one person at a time. To be in love with more than one."

"I know that," she said and bopped his nose. "And I know you. It'll tear you up inside."

"She doesn't want me," Dick said.

"Dick…" Babs shook her head. "No, that's between you and Starfire."

He narrowed his eyes at her. "Do you know something?"

"See?" she said, smiling. "You can't help yourself. So I'm going to do the sensible and stupid thing and say no. At least, not right now."

"Not right now?" he asked, hopeful.

"I'm going to be an 8-Ball and say 'Ask again later'. When I'm not feeling so vulnerable and clingy."

He grumbled. "Great, now I feel like a jerk."

"You just have terrible timing, that's all."

"I'm an acrobat. I'm supposed to have awesome timing."

"This _sucks_," she tossed up her free hand. "'Cause that was an _awesome_ kiss."

"Really?"

"Delicious belly tickles and everything," she told him.

He grinned.

She flopped back on her pillows and groan-sighed in pleasure. "Damn, that was good." Dick's grin turned into a self-satisfied one and she belted his arm. "Stop smirking, show off."

"Care to reconsider?" he asked. "I can kiss you again."

She mock-scowled at him. "Don't tempt me. I can reach the water jug from here."

Dick laughed, then sobered, needing clarification. "When's later?"

"I don't know, Dick," she said and squeezed his fingers. "When my life is not so up in the air? When you finally have some closure with Starfire? I don't know. What I do know is I really need you as a friend right now."

* * *

**_Author's Note:_**

_Babs lost the use of her legs during an altercation with the Joker in the graphic novel called "A Killing Joke." (Timeline wise, it happened when Jason was still Robin, not Tim). Joker shot and paralysed her in an attempt to drive her father insane, thereby proving to Batman that anyone can be morally compromised (in some flashbacks I think it shows Babs leaping to cover her father). It doesn't work. But the novel wasn't really about her, nor her emotional state, she was just a plot device. So I don't think we ever saw what she went through (I could be wrong) and I wanted to touch on that a bit. Also, when it occurred, Dick and Starfire were on Tamaran, so he didn't know until several months afterward (when according to Devin Grayson's Nightwing series, he came to Babs in an emotional state, had sex with her, then callously gave her an invite to his and Kory's wedding. Screw that.) _

_Also, Babs and Dick have had an on-again, off-again relationship for years in the comics (depending on which ones you read omg get your stories straight DC). They have been steadily heading toward something like this in A choice made. The only difference between this and the comics, Babs is also friends with Starfire, so is more likely to take Star's feelings into account._

**_Obligatory warning_**_: I am a multi-shipper. Babs is, was and will always be an important person to Dick, (just as Starfire is, was and always will be important to him as well). I have done my very best to show a natural progression in this, but I have already had a couple of comments. So...** Any character bashing will result in the Kry Hammer coming out early. I will not tolerate it.** _

_I kind of think it's sad I still have to put a warning like that in. _


	9. Bludhaven

_**Author's note:**_

_Hmm._

* * *

**Bludhaven**

"What you got for me this evening?"

"Hmm," Oracle said, her fingers clacking away at the keyboard. "Not much. Routine stuff really."

"Routine stuff is boring," Nightwing lamented. He sat on the upper awnings of one of the tallest buildings in Bludhaven, looking out over the city and talking to her over the comm. It'd been his home for four weeks now. Some nights he worked himself into the ground chasing bad guys, others, like tonight, were bone dry in terms of action.

He was still learning the feel of the city, both as Dick Grayson, supercop, and Nightwing. Learning its moods. Its waxing and waning. As Dick, he had the benefit of turning to his co-workers and learning from their experiences and knowledge. As Nightwing, he had the newly appointed Oracle.

Babs was doing much better now. Her upper body slowly gained strength. Her confidence and assurance in herself returning slowly and she'd found herself a calling in gathering information and running the Birds of Prey. There were still hard days, days where she curled up into a ball and couldn't function, but they were becoming few and far between.

"So make it fun," she suggested.

"Or, I could come to Gotham and we could go out to dinner."

"Raincheck," Oracle said absently and Nightwing got the feeling she was multitasking on several fronts. "Bird of Prey responsibilities."

Nightwing huffed. "Babs, I'm bored."

"Gah. Fine. Hang on." A short static burst. "Tim. Dick's bored. Entertain him."

Nightwing snorted.

"Why me?" Robin complained.

"I'm busy being awesome," Oracle said.

"I have my hands full," Robin replied. "There's a vigilante on the loose, I'm tracking her down."

"Spoiler?" Oracle said and more keyboard noises sounded.

"Haven't you nabbed her yet?" Nightwing asked, tapping his heels against the brickwork as he swung his feet.

"Oh, great. Am I on speaker?"

"Yes," Nightwing and Oracle said.

"Great. Dick, go jump off a building."

"What a fantastic idea," Nightwing said. "Except I've already done that tonight. Which is why I was bothering Babs."

"And I'm busy," Oracle said.

"Do it blindfolded," Robin suggested. "Or backward. Or one arm tied behind your back."

"Do we have a problem?" Batman asked in his ever suffering 'do I need to intervene, children?' voice.

"No," the three of them chorused, scolded.

"Less chatter on this line."

"See what you did?" Robin said after a suitable time where they hoped Batman had signed off. Which they were never truly sure of; Batman had ears in all sorts of places.

"Not my fault," Oracle said.

"And I'm still bored."

Robin scoffed. "Jesus Dick—"

"Wait, wait," Nightwing brightened. "I see flashing lights. Bye!"

"You are such a child," Oracle said.

Nightwing laughed and jumped from the building.

Freefall, such freedom and speed, he loved the feel of it, the power he could feel in the pull of the Earth as it drew him downward. With a loud 'whoop', he pulled out a grappling hook and shot it toward an adjacent building, using his downward speed to swing.

It was wonderful to work solo. Sure, villains had come to test him, test his abilities as a crime fighter and as a solo vigilante, but he thwarted them at every turn. Because, while he was solo, he still had the capacity to be backed up at a moment's notice. With the Titan Network, Oracle, Robin and Batman on his speed dial, there was no trouble he could not handle, and no fear of asking for help. Not that he'd needed it as yet. But knowing, one day if he asked, they'd be there was liberating.

Free running across the top of Bludhaven was relatively easy, if dangerous. There were some old, worn down buildings, but most had awnings, railings or shared walls which made bridging the distances between buildings easier. It was also exhilarating, Bludhaven was a playground for an acrobat.

Sometimes you win, sometimes you lose. Nightwing stared dejectedly at the car bomb which had caused the flashing lights he'd chased through Bludhaven.

"Babs, I 'r' disappoint," he said, woeful.

"Argh, what now?" she complained, sounding exasperated.

"It was a car fire. Nothing exciting. Are you sure you have nothing for me?"

"Call it a night. Have an early one. Come here and give me a back rub. I don't know, Dick. I have nothing."

"Back rub, huh?" Nightwing asked, grinning.

"This chair isn't exactly broken in yet," she said and Nightwing could hear the wince in her tone.

"Get some cushions."

"Or a sexy masseuse."

"Or that."

"Up for it, or should I call a service?"

"I dunno. Is that something friends do for each other?" he asked, teasing her.

She mock growled at him. "A friend would bring a pizza too."

Nightwing laughed. "Pizza and a back rub. Some friend I am."

"What can I say? I'm needy."

"All right. Let me do one last patrol and change. I'll get your damn pizza."

"Thank you!" she chimed.

"Meat lovers?"

"Yes, please."

Nightwing liked the easy, flirty relationship they were developing. More than friends, but not yet girlfriend and boyfriend. There was no rush, they were free to take their time toward a goal they both felt was coming. He doubted he'd actually give her a backrub tonight, Babs tended to skirt around increasing the physical contact between them. He wouldn't kiss her until she indicated she was ready for that, but perhaps tonight was the night.

Of course, he hadn't counted on the Puppet King trying to liberate all the toys in the local Toys R Us store by bringing them all to life and send on a rampage through the store.

"Seriously?" he asked, hesitating in the doorway as he watched the Woody dolls run around looking for anything vaguely porcelain shaped, and the Buzz and Jesse dolls pairing off. The stuff elephants ate green Lego, the toy soldiers created mock wars so they could play. "I get all the lame villains too?"

The Puppet King cackled. "Ahh, Nightwing, so pleased you could join me—"

Nightwing tossed a capsule of sticky goo at the Puppet King. "Yeah, not interested," he said as the capsule burst open and coated the Puppet King's mouth. "Can't give orders if you can't talk. Now where's your—"

As one, the toys stopped their happy frolicking and turned to face him, their blank little eyes seemed to focus. "Woah. Creepy."

In union, they all took a step toward him.

Nightwing took a step back. "Super creepy."

With a gleam in his eye which could be mistaken for wood shine, the Puppet King thrust forward his wooden hand. The toys charged.

Nightwing bounced up onto the paying counter, under the belief the toys couldn't reach him here. They piled against it, climbing on top of each other. Toy planes zipped down from the roof, their propellers working madly to keep their feeble bodies in flight. Pulling out his sticks, he battered the planes away, kicking his foot at the ever-growing toy pile.

His exploding discs came out, since toys could burn, as much as he didn't think the owners would want him destroying merchandise, he also didn't think they'd want to see alive, moving and eerily staring toys to children.

Plastic hands grabbed at his foot and he shook it to try and dislodge them. Little bodies went flying all directions.

There were just too many. Body parts blown up by his discs did not stop moving. Toys cast away came straight back again. Noise and bips filled the air, toys playing their automated sounds. Plastic mallets from drums beat at him. Barbie dolls brushed his hair with their little combs and he battered at them with his hand. Ponies fluttered around him and a unicorn stuck him in the ass with its horn.

"Oh no," he said, bringing out his ice pellets. "I'm not going down to a bunch of dolls."

It was like trying to remove a swarm of ants from his body after falling into one of their nests. He'd done that as a child. Hundreds of bites all over his body, swatting at them made no difference, they just replaced the number lost with more. It didn't help that there were hundreds of tiny calls all over the place. "Yeeha!" "Ride 'em cowboy." "To infinity and beyond!" "I'm Princess Celestria." "I'm gonna Wreak it!"

He clambered around, firing his disc, exploding toys and other gizmos which occupied toy stores. Kicking stuff bears. Throwing flowers away. Unclipping annoying princess earrings from his ears. Fleeing from the fairy wings.

The Puppet King laughed, his minions having freed him from his gag. "Get him, my minions."

Covered in toys and stuffing, Nightwing made his way over to the Puppet King. If he could just get that controller and destroy it, all this mayhem would be over.

Even if he would have nightmares for weeks about the tiny Handy Manny doll humping his leg, proudly declaring, "YES WE CAN!"

A well-placed birdarang sliced the Puppet King's controller in half.

The Puppet King looked mournfully at it as the toys keeled over all around him. Nightwing picked a piece of fluff out of his hair and gave the Puppet King a disdainful look. "You'd better run."

It was insanely easy to follow the hurried clacking of wooden legs through the darkened streets of Bludhaven and herd the Puppet King toward some willing police officers on duty.

Nightwing decided it would be better to return home and shower to be rid of all the fairy sparkles and toy make up which had decided to make themselves at home all over his face and in his hair. Babs would have a field day with teasing him otherwise.

He had a modest apartment on the east side, near the river and within walking distance of the main hub of the city. He didn't really need a massive hideout like Batman used, especially since he still had access to the Batcave if needed. But he did have a secure vault to store his uniforms in and a highly protected computer in his study to use for cases. A master bedroom, the second bedroom used as a gym, a small study, a kitchen separate from the living room, fire escape access and a car space. Simple, but that was all he needed. His N-Cycle hid in the alleyway between his building and his neighbour, protected by a hologram. A crude set-up, but Dick liked it. His N-Cycle doubled as his normal vehicle, the hologram being able disguise it as an ordinary road bike.

It was a decent neighbourhood. Most people kept to themselves and the alleyway (and fire escape) didn't have many windows facing it, nor a lot of light at night. It was easy enough to slip out of if there was an emergency.

Stripping off his uniform, he made sure it was stowed away correctly and hit the shower. He scrubbed every inch of himself to get rid of those damn sparkles, which only seemed to glue to his skin harder once they'd come in contact with water. The tiles of his shower winked at him before the sprinkles slid down the drain.

He dressed, jeans and a T, grabbed his riding jacket and headed out to his bike. He called Babs local pizza delivery, ordered a pizza to be delivered to her place in about thirty five minutes, which would give him time to arrive just as the pizza did.

Wincing and cursing the damn plastic unicorn horn as he sat down on his bike, he headed out.

He'd made it as far as the outskirts of Gotham when a raven shrieked ahead of him. Right in the middle of the freeway, the black power arched toward the sky, crying out. He hit the breaks, turned the bike to skid so he wouldn't slam into Raven as she stepped from the bird.

Thankful he was alone on the freeway, he lifted his face mask on his helmet. "Raven?"

She seemed distracted, dishevelled and glad to see him. "You need to come," she blurted.

"What's wrong?" he asked.

"It's Starfire."

Dick's heart tripled its speed. "Star? What's happened?"

Raven placed her hands on the handlebars of Dick's bike. "She's drunk."

He frowned. "I don't see what—"

"Dick. She's _drunk_."

"She _can't_ get drunk," Dick replied, staring at Raven.

"Exactly," Raven said and wrapped them both up in her powers.


	10. What do yo do with a drunken Tamaranian?

**_Author's Note: _**_I had a couple of reviews from people with private messages disabled, which means I can't review reply. If you want a reply from me after you review, please make sure they're turned on, thanks._

_And for some reason, it won't let me change the chapter name, sorry. Deal with the spelling error until this is fixed. _

* * *

**What do you do with a drunken Tamaranian?**

Dick didn't know what he expected as Raven released them from her portal. Thoughts of a merrily-belting-out-Tamaranian-folk-lore-songs and happy Starfire crossed his mind, but that didn't account for Raven's worry. Maybe she was getting frisky at a local bar and her strength wouldn't allow Raven to coax her away. After all, it was Starfire, the kindest, gentlest soul he had ever known. How bad could it be?

Raven released them into a world of fire and destruction.

Dick sat back on the bike, staring in dismay. He recognised the area, at least, he thought he did. The old, abandoned warehouse district on the south side of Jump, slated for demolishment early next year.

Starfire stood in the middle of the burning wreckage of what was once a warehouse, beating the rubble with a large, stone column. Her hair burned, her eyes blazed and she yelled each time she brought the column crashing down.

Fire engines rimmed the road up one end of the district, ready to act and aid. A police barrier across the end kept the crowd of onlookers and photographers at a distance. A safety precaution, since the area was also littered with Titans.

Aqualad waited in the river which ran beside the warehouses, Dick could see his head poking out, beside him a green dolphin watched. No doubt they were for fire control, but with Starfire flaming so brightly, he didn't think they could help without her permission. Bumblebee and her team watched from the sidelines, probably came with Aqualad when he was called.

Cyborg turned at the sound of Raven's screech, his face a picture of relief. "Thank god."

"What…?" Dick was dismayed.

"It started this morning, I think," Cyborg said, one hand on his hip, the other rubbed his bald head.

Dick glanced at the night sky, she'd been going for some time then. Why were they only just calling him now?

"We don't know why," Cyborg continued. "We didn't know until she… until when all the alcohol in the Tower was gone and I found her in a liquor store, she'd gone through— she came here and started destroying things. I tried to contain her for a while… but…" he shrugged. "She's not acting like she's drunk, at least by human terms, but… whatever this is, it's not normal."

Dick looked at Raven. "Why was she drinking?" Starfire drinking to excess was disturbing enough, but seeing her demolish made him worried.

"I don't know. I was in Azarath," Raven explained. "Gar called me. I'm…" She pressed a palm to her chest. "It hurts."

"What hurts?" Dick asked.

"Everything. Everything hurts," she said, studying Starfire. "Something bad happened."

"She won't listen to us, man," Cyborg said. "We've tried. You're last resort. She's gotta stop soon or she'll hurt herself."

"What makes you think she'll listen to me?" Dick asked, ducking from the loud crack the column made as it broke. That didn't stop Starfire; she picked up another wooden piece and reduced that to splinters. "We're not exactly on the best terms."

"You have a better chance than any of us," Raven said. "You have more influence over her than you know."

"You just need to get her to talk," Cyborg said. "We need to know why. She can destroy all she likes, but we're all worried."

Dick got off his bike and put the stand down. "Just a sec," he murmured. Pulling out his phone, he called Babs.

"Hey, Dick," she sang happily through the phone. "Are you on your way?"

"Raincheck," he said.

"Aww, what?" she asked, disappointed.

"Check the satellites over Jump," he said. "Don't know how long I'll be. Sorry."

There was a clicking sound, then, "Oh shit… what's going… oh… is that… is that Starfire?"

"Yes. Gotta go. Your pizza's on the way, I prepaid. Enjoy."

"Thanks."

Hanging up, Dick put the cell away.

"Sorry, man," Cyborg said, watching Starfire. "Didn't realise we were interrupting a date."

"You weren't," Dick said and squared his shoulders. "All right, let's see what I can do."

Picking his way carefully through the debris and the fires, he made sure he kept himself within Starfire's range of sight so he wouldn't be sneaking up on her. He could feel the heat of her flames surrounding him. She didn't acknowledge him and he wondered if, in whatever haze she was in, she saw what was occurring around her. He stopped within reaction distance, or the distance from her if she turned on him, he'd be able to avoid what was coming. "Starfire?"

She snarled and did not stop obliterating stonework into tiny pebbles with her foot.

He took a step to the side so he was opposite her. "Starfire, it's Dick."

"Do you think me unaware?" she snarled.

"I don't know what I think," he said, keeping his voice as soothing as he could. "This isn't like you at all. What's wrong?"

"Nothing is wrong," she snapped. "Everything is perfect."

"You're scaring people."

She tossed her head as if it didn't matter. "Are you afraid of me, Dick?" she asked, and slammed her foot down on a chunk of concrete.

"No. Never. I know you."

She scoffed.

"I know you wouldn't be doing this unless something was really wrong. What's happened?"

She pressed her lips into a thin line and swayed. Her arms were scattered up and down with little scratches and he wondered how long she'd been doing this before they'd come and gotten him.

"Please," he said, taking a step toward her. "Talk. If not to me, then Raven."

Starfire's body jerked. "No. She _cannot_ know."

"What can't she know?"

Starfire knelt down and dug her fingers into a beam of wood. "I try and I try and I try and it is never good enough." She began digging into the wood as though it were sand, tossing the shreds behind her. "Not human enough. Not Tamaranian enough. Two worlds and I do not fit into either. I will _never_ fit in, no matter how hard I try. The colour of my skin is wrong, orange freak, lay off the tan. My temperament is wrong. _Rutha_, _skorn nu k'urr._ I am too much of a warrior and not enough of one. What am I to do? And now they are coming and they will _know_. They will know that which I hidden for years and it will destroy everything and I shall be forced to do something I do not want to do."

"What will you be forced to do?"

She hesitated, her fingers buried deep within the wood. He watched her flex her hands and draw them away to study her fingers. "Give her up."

"Give who up?"

Starfire shook her head. "Silly little alien, bonded and bound. Caught in a trap she made herself and now cannot escape. Cannot ever escape because she wanted the trap. Wanted it so much and then gave it up because she could not carry the consequences. " She sang her words, a poem which he did not understand.

"Starfire, you're not making sense."

"I cannot," she cried. "I cannot give her up, she is all I have left!" She hugged herself. "She is mine and I am hers and you _cannot_ know! Not you, not you." She clawed at her face. "_X'hal_, they will kill me."

"_Who_?"

She shook her head again with more ferocity, the movement making her sway dangerously.

Taking another step forward, he crouched down so he could see her face. "I'll protect you."

The anger in her broke and the flames of her eyes and hair died. Whether that was from his words or she was exhausted, Dick didn't know. Tears fled down her cheeks. "You do not know what you are saying."

"I do. They won't hurt you. I promise. I'll protect you."

She shivered and curled in on herself. "Do not say that."

"You're my friend," he said, stressing each word. "I'll. Protect. You."

"They are binding words. You _must_ not say them."

"Then tell me what's wrong," he prompted. "Tell me how I— how we— can help."

She released herself and reached out to dig her hands into the wood again. "No."

He reached out and placed his hand on hers, if only to stop her from returning to her frenzy. "Starfire."

Eyes riveted on his hand, her entire body went stiff, her face going paler than he'd ever seen her. "Please, do not touch me. I cannot fight it when you touch me."

He didn't let her go. It was the first contact they'd shared in years; he could feel her skin warming beneath his hand. It had been so cold, _so_ cold. Icy, an oddity since she was always so fiery. Tamaranians, so sensitive to touch and he used that sensitivity now to calm her. "Tell me what's wrong."

She met his gaze and then crumpled. "Galfore has perished."

Dick's heart fell into his stomach. "Oh, no. God no. I'm so sorry."

She wept. "My _k'norfka_ is gone and now they come for me."

"Who's coming?" he asked.

"The Royal Guard," she whispered, tears streaking her face. "They wish for me to return home. I cannot go, Dick, I _cannot_. They will take her from me."

"Take who?"

"I kept her quiet, kept her safe, all these years. She is mine and I am hers." Starfire's eyes unfocussed and she swayed and Dick knew she was heartbeats from fainting. "She is mine and I am hers and she is yours and you are hers but you are not mine and it will never be and I cannot bear it alone."

"Starfire, I don't understand."

Starfire's eyes rolled back and she collapsed, Dick snatching her before she hit the ground. Cradling her in his arms, he called, "Raven!"

TTTTT

Raven closed the door behind her. "She's sleeping," she murmured. "It's a light one, most of the alcohol is draining quite rapidly."

"Lucky," Beast Boy mentioned, then shrivelled under Raven's disapproving eye. "I just meant— I mean— she, I, er, Cy?"

"On your own on that one, B."

Dick stared at Starfire's door, confused. "What are we going to do when she wakes?"

"The best we can," Raven said. "I tried to take some of the emotional pain, but she wouldn't let me."

"She's unconscious, how can she not let you?" Beast Boy asked.

"Unconscious doesn't mean consenting," Raven said. "She has to want me to take away the pain before I can and she's holding onto it tightly. But I feel it's more than Galfore. Galfore's death set this off, but it's been building for a while."

Dick wondered if it could be jealousy. If Starfire saw how close he and Babs were getting, how would she feel about that? He wasn't about to voice that theory though. "You're closest to her," Dick said. "Has she said anything to you?"

Raven shook her head.

_Raven cannot know. _

"It's something she's been hiding for a while," Dick murmured.

"Did she say something?" Raven asked.

"Bits and pieces which don't make sense at all." He glanced at Cyborg. "She said the Royal Guards were coming for her."

Cyborg frowned and headed for Ops. "I'll check the communications from Tamaran. See if I can confirm the death too."

"Tell the Watch Tower to deny access for diplomatic reasons for the time being," Dick called after him. "Put them and the Network on alert. We're going to assume she doesn't want to go with them, so until she gives the word, any attempt to take her from Earth will be considered hostile."

"We'd risk starting a war with Tamaran," Beast Boy said.

"No, we're stalling," Dick corrected. "Until Starfire's coherent enough to explain."

"I'll sit with her," Raven said.

Dick nodded. "I want to know when she wakes up."

"Of course," Raven said and phased through the door.

"Can I make a suggestion which may help the solemn mood?" Beast Boy asked.

Dick gave him a tight smile. "Yes, pizza would be a good idea right now."

"Good."

Dick watched Beast Boy bound down the hallway and marvel that age never replaced boyish enthusiasm. He rolled his shoulder, his eyes lingering on Starfire's door again. "I need to find a uniform."

TTTTT

"I respectfully decline to allow you access to the Princess," Nightwing said. "She is currently indisposed. As your arrival was not planned nor agreed to in advance, I suggest you wait until she becomes available."

The haughty Tamaranian man scowled at him over the video. "This is an act of war—"

"With all due respect," Nightwing said. "I think our Green Lantern would object to that. Tamaran has no authority outside the Vegan system, for you to declare war on Earth simply because the Princess, your monarch, is currently unavailable to answer a summons which you have the audacity to give without prior warning, is far outside your jurisdiction and we would have the capacity to ask for the Lantern Corps' aid."

"Absolutely," Green Lantern said, crossing his arms and glaring at the Tamaranian entourage which had entered Earth's space to collect Starfire.

The Tamaranians muttered between themselves, several of their eyes flashing green in anger.

"We will notify you when the Princess becomes available," Nightwing suggested. "Until then, sit tight. Enjoy the comforts of the Watch Tower."

One of the females asked, "You are Nightwing, are you not?"

Nightwing hesitated for a heartbeat. "Yes."

"She is under your protection?"

"Yes."

As one the Tamaranians relaxed. "Then we shall take your offer to enjoy the comforts of the Watch Tower."

Nightwing was taken aback by the sudden shift. "Um… okay. Good. Hal?"

"I'll keep an eye on them," Green Lantern said, giving him a wink as they signed off.

"Was that weird or what?" Cyborg said.

"They just… I thought we'd be in for a bigger fight," Beast Boy said. "But they… Dick, what's going on?"

Nightwing frowned. "I wish I knew."


	11. Reasons

**Reasons**

"She's awake," Raven said from the common room door. The sun was just creeping up over the horizon, Starfire had been out for most of the night.

Cyborg, Beast Boy and Nightwing all got to their feet from where they'd been lounging half-asleep on the couch. They'd been up worrying and talking, and playing some console games to pass the time.

Raven held up a stalling hand. "Just Nightwing."

Cyborg opened his mouth. "But—"

"I'm sorry," Raven said. "She wants to speak to him. Alone."

Nightwing hesitated.

Cyborg huffed as he sat back down. "Good luck."

Nightwing thought he'd probably need it.

Raven walked him to Starfire's door. "Be gentle," she advised. "She's very fragile."

He nodded. "Thanks."

Starfire sat curled up on the window seat in her room, staring out her window at the early morning sky, looking like she might break with one wrong word. She was wrapped up in her thick blanket, with only her face showing. She turned her head as he entered and curled up tighter when she saw who it was.

"Hi," he said and removed his mask as a courtesy.

A tear slid down her cheek as she watched him.

He crossed her bedroom and sat opposite her, as close as he dared. He tried not to be upset when she shifted her feet away from him. "I'm sorry about Galfore."

Starfire choked on a sob, the despair on her face evident.

"He was a good man."

She nodded.

"He loved you so much."

She crumpled, buried her face in her knees and he reached out to place his hand on the back of her head. After a moment, she folded toward him, her head landing on his chest and he took that for an invitation to gather her up. She mumbled in Tamaranian, Dick caught snatches of words and even less of their meanings but he heard Galfore's name a lot. He stroked her back through the thick blanket, rocked her and murmured soothing words.

The sobs quietened for the moment but Dick knew she had a lot more tears to shed. Grief tended to wane and return with a vengeance. He hoped she would be coherent enough to give him some answers now.

She sighed, lifting away from him and scooted back to the corner to huddle.

Not sure what else he should do, he asked, "How are you?"

She wiped the tear away from her face with the blanket. Letting out a shuttering sigh which rocked through her body, she rasped, "Dick."

"Yes?"

"I require your help."

He tried to smile for her but it came out feeling tight and wrong. "I kind of figured that."

"You are not going to like what I have to say."

"I figured that too," he said. "Does it have something to do with why you snapped like you did?"

"It has… a lot to do with a lot of things," she murmured and wiped away another tear. She couldn't seem to stop them falling but it didn't stop her from talking.

"And the Royal Guard?"

She trembled. "They are here?"

He nodded. "Guests at the Watch Tower until your say so."

She looked out the window. "_X'hal_."

"We aren't going to let them take you back to Tamaran without your consent."

"I may not have a choice," she whispered.

"There's _always_ a choice."

More tears and silence from Starfire. Dick wished he could hug her again, hugs always made her feel better, but he also knew he couldn't until she asked. Not with the state she was in.

"Do you remember much about last night?" he asked, trying to understand.

She sniffled. "We… do not have memory lapses like your species seems to."

"You weren't making much sense."

"I…" she swallowed. "I… know."

"Do you want to talk about it?"

She nodded.

"Okay," he said and waited.

She chewed on her lip.

"Start at the beginning," Dick suggested. "Whatever it is, it can't be that bad."

"It is."

"Star…"

She took a deep, shuddering breath and let it out slowly. "I know you are developing the feelings toward Babs and that it is mutual, I do not wish to come between that."

He sat back and stared at her in disbelief. "So… this is about Babs and me?" He struggled not to get angry, he'd thought her above petty jealousy.

"Babs… will become part of this, I am certain." She swallowed again and tilted her head until it rested on the window pane. "Did I ever tell you of Madison?"

"Your…" He struggled to remember, the name was familiar. "Roommate?" he guessed. "From college?"

"Yes."

"Not so much."

"She is the one who told me of the friends-with-benefits."

Dick frowned, wondering why she was bringing this up now and what it had to do with what happened last night.

"She said there was a list of rules to follow and, if followed correctly… there is no better word for this other than 'trap' a man into a permanent relationship."

Dick stiffened. "Trap," he said in a dead voice.

"Not that I discovered how until discussing it with Donna," Starfire explained, still looking out into the new morning. "But naiveté is not an excuse. I should have been more careful. Researched."

"I always wondered where you got the idea of rules from," Dick said. "Because we didn't make any. And we should've, right from the beginning. It wouldn't have ended so badly if we had."

She raised her head from the window to stare at him. "Do you believe that?"

Dick nodded. He leant forward and rested his elbows on his knees. "I got angry because I wanted to return to what we had and it seemed you preferred it the friends-with-benefits way."

Starfire dropped her eyes. "The way she explained it, it was the perfect arrangement for someone who you wanted to be with but for reasons unforseen could not be with them yet. Not in a relationship capacity. I thought… I tried to keep it separate. I truly did."

"Sex and friendship. Yeah. I kind of figured that out after it was too late to take back what I said."

She sighed. "Well, it matters not."

"You wanted to be with me, too, didn't you," he stated.

She didn't answer. The blankets around her moved like she was curling up more.

"But you couldn't?" he asked. "Why not?"

"There are still many things about my people you do not know," Starfire said. "Or if you know, you do not understand."

Dick frowned. "What does that mean?"

"In essence… there is still a trap."

Dick narrowed his eyes.

She couldn't look at him. "One I have avoided mentioning. One… which I have denied myself for so long but the time approaches where I can no longer. I think… I think I allowed this to happen rather than face it."

He watched her. "Allowed this?"

"You will not like this."

"Star—"

"There are… few animals on Earth which have this, but it still exists. Tamaranians call it the _teslait'n_. The human word for it is 'diapause'."

"Okay."

She judged him and his lack of reaction. "Do you know what it is?"

He frowned. "No… I can't say that I do."

She buried her face in her blanket-covered knees for a brief moment, trying to hide. "Diapause is the ability to put an embryo's development on hold."

"…Okay…"

Starfire sighed and raised her head so she could look at him. "I am pregnant."

There was a flash of emotion which coursed through him. He thought it might be envy. "Oh."

"It is yours."

He stared at her in disbelief, his heart pounding. "That's… that's not possible."

Starfire didn't answer.

"_How_? We've always—we never— we were careful!" Wait, she said _trap_. "Did you get pregnant on purpose?" he snapped, scowling.

"Of course not," she said, appalled he would think so. "The condom broke, do you recall?"

He stared at her, unable to believe. "But that was _years_ ago."

Starfire nodded. "Just before you said you wanted to go to Gotham for college."

He rose to his feet, taking a few steps away from her. He needed to _move_, needed to pace. "I worried about that for weeks and you never said anything!" he ranted. "Why didn't you tell me!? I wouldn't have gone!"

She watched him walk with veiled eyes. "Which is why I did not."

"Star… I... you've been pregnant this _whole_ time?" he frowned, pausing in his pacing as he realised something. "This is the reason, isn't it?"

She remained silent.

He started moving again. "The reason you broke up with me. The whole thing about regrets and being normal. This is why you didn't fight when I stepped back from the friends-with-benefits."

Her lips pressed together, tears still streaking from her eyes but she said nothing.

"Starfire, do you really think that little of me? I would've stood by you. I wouldn't have—"

"I am not unfamiliar with the Earthen story of women falling pregnant to ensure their man stays with them."

"But—"

"I would not have done that to you. You had plans. You had hopes and dreams and I would not dash them."

"That's noble of you, but you didn't have to face this alone. We were partners—"

"We are not anymore," she said. "And the first thing you said to me just then was 'did I do this on purpose'."

"You didn't tell me on purpose," he responded.

She shrunk back. "You wanted normal," she whispered. "A baby would not have been normal, especially not one of dual bloodlines. I thought if I gave you a chance to experience the normal…"

He stopped pacing and ran a hand through his hair. "You should've told me."

Her nod was meek and small. "I did wrong."

"You did." He turned, pacing in tight circles. "Okay. Right. So, you're pregnant. Well, not pregnant exactly, pregnancy on hold?"

"Yes."

"Right. Well then, first thing is—"

"There is more."

He stopped moving. "Of course there is." Scrubbing both hands through his hair, he scratched his skull hard. Maybe if he scratched hard enough, he could pry his brain out and figure out what he thought about this situation. "Right." Rubbed his face and started the tight circles again. "Okay. Fine. Hit me."

"Will you sit?" she asked.

"Do you mind if I don't?"

"Please. I hate it when you pace," she murmured. "It always makes me feel as though you will lash out."

"What the f—" he paused and thought about that. "Right. Okay." Crossing over to her, he slumped down on the seat and put his back to the window.

"Thank you."

He nodded.

"Galfore," she choked the name out. She struggled and for a moment he thought she might burst into tears again, but she managed to continue. "He died during an overthrow. One of the other houses now holds the title of Grand Ruler. They have recalled me. I am… to wed. The politics of Tamaran are most complex, suffice it to say my heritage will ensure they hold the throne."

"Ahh. The old story, huh? Once a princess, always a princess."

"Indeed."

"Can you fight the wedding?"

"I could, but not in my current condition. The Royal Guard will know within moments of seeing me I am in _teslait'n. _They will not want an heir of dual bloodlines and I am physically incapable of having any sort of intercourse with anyone else while I carry her, let alone produce an heir. They will force me to terminate. If I refuse, they will kill me."

He jerked, opening his eyes to stare at her. "Physically… you've never slept with anyone else?"

"No."

His mouth dropped open. "I thought—"

Starfire turned bashful for a moment. "It has only ever been you."

He was surprised at how relieved that knowledge made him. He blinked, his mind going a different direction. "They'll kill you if you refuse? You?"

"I have no one sworn to protect me. They would wait until..." she frowned. "No, you will not understand… um… If I allow this pregnancy to commence… um…" She grimaced. "I am sorry, it is difficult to explain."

"Take your time."

She nodded. "Our young are fed by our green energy. Once the baby begins to grow, I will lose the ability to use it for anything else, such as flight or strength. That is why we can choose when to commence incubation when an egg is fertilised. Our partner must protect us during the course of the pregnancy and for several months after. We become very dependent, in most ways, including…" She shook her head and moved on. "Our males become fiercely territorial when we breed, most breeding pairs separate themselves from society until after birth. Some couples only choose to have one child, others leave their offspring to be raised by a _k'norfka_. As I have no protector… they would wait until I choose to bear her, then they will attempt to force me to abort while I was weak. I would… allow them to kill me."

"_Allow_?" His heart leapt up to his throat. She'd let them kill her rather than live without their child? "Why?"

"She is mine and I am hers," she said, more calm and sure of herself than she had been the whole time they'd been talking.

Remembering how she spoke last night he said, "And she is mine and I am—"

Starfire lunged for him, clapping her hands over his mouth. "NO! Those words, they are binding! You must not, not until you are certain."

She balanced before him, a wild look in her eyes. Her cold hands grew warm against his mouth and cheeks and he could feel his skin tingling. There was intimacy in her careless actions, an intimacy they hadn't shared in a long time. He gently tugged her hands from his mouth, keeping them to hold. "Explain."

"It is ritual. If you say them… it means you choose her. You choose—" She shook her head. "I cannot ask you to do that."

"She's mine too." He hesitated. "A girl?"

She burst into a smile. "Yes," she breathed, her whole mood uplifting.

Dick grinned in return, thinking she never looked more beautiful.

Her smile vanished just as fast and she extracted her hands, tucking them back under the blanket. "I am sorry."

He looked away from her, mourning the moment lost. "Hmm."

"You are taking this most calmly."

"I don't know what to think. I can't…"

"I am sorry."

"It's a lot to take in… I mean… seriously…" He laughed, the sound a little hysterical. "It's a little overwhelming to know not only is my ex _pregnant_, but that it was maintained through a biological process I was completely unaware of."

"Oh."

"How did you _think_ I was going to feel?" he asked. "I'm angry you never told me. I'm upset you felt you couldn't trust me. I'm absolutely shit scared because I'm going to be a father and that definitely wasn't on the to-do list this year. I'm also…" he scratched his head. "I think it's excitement… I can't really tell, there's so much more going on. Did I miss anything out?"

"I…"

"Come to think of it, how have you been able to survive all these years? Dealing with it, by yourself."

"I… could not tell you."

"I think this is the most we've talked in… years. Proper, serious conversation."

She hid in her blanket. "I was afraid to tell you."

"You should _never_ be afraid of me."

"We did not part in the best of terms," she explained. "Until two months ago, I had thought there would be no hope of ever…" She shook her head. "You are with Babs, I cannot—"

"Babs… she's not going to like this."

"You should speak to her before you decide."

He frowned. "What's there to decide?" he asked, anger suddenly the most prominent emotion. "There seems to be very little choice here. Either you have _our_ baby and I protect you, or you go back to Tamaran and they kill you. I'm _not_ going to let you die."

"Dick—"

"The Royal Guard's here already. You said they'd know—"

"We lie."

"What?"

"They will know I am in _teslait'n_, yes. But you are human, you will not have the same territorial instinct. We tell them you are my protector. They will leave."

"What about this wedding treaty?"

_"Teslait'n _supersedes that."

He gave her a narrowed eyed look. "Does it really?"

She flinched. "It will… until she is born at least. After that, I cannot say."

"So you might still have to leave."

"But it will give you time."

"Time for what, exactly?

She dropped her eyes. "To think. To discuss it with Babs. It is… a big change."

"I already told your guard you were under my protection."

She jerked. "You did?"

He nodded. "I mean, I didn't know what it could mean. But I'd do it again."

"You should not have done that."

"Why?" She didn't answer. Still so many unanswered questions, but one burning one. "You do want this baby, don't you?" he asked, seeking confirmation.

"I would not have kept her safe for so long if I did not," she whispered. She raised her head. "All I would need would be your assistance to begin the process. I would not ask anything else from you. I will raise her on Tamaran, you would not even have to acknowledge her if you did not—"

"Like _hell_," he snapped. "You will _not_ cut me out. I _will_ be a part of this, whether you like it or not."

She curled up again.

He lifted his legs so he could rest his feet flat on the seat and draped his hands over his knees. "Can you start without me?"

"It is possible," she murmured. "But unwise."

"Right… and how much longer can you put her on pause?"

"Once Tamaran knows… a few more months, perhaps."

He stared at the roof. Starfire wiped her face on the blanket and stared out the window. Silence ballooned in the space between them. Dick's mind was in turmoil, his whole world had been changed in a moment. Priorities were already rearranging themselves in his mind.

The fact she hadn't started the process spoke volumes to him. She must have always hoped they'd get back together in some form. Or perhaps it had been too hard to let it go, to carry someone for so long, he wasn't sure he even knew how she felt.

"I gotta ask…" he trailed off, unsure how to phrase it.

"Yes?" she prompted.

"How do you feel about me?"

She let a breath out slowly.

"'Cause if we're going to do this, I need to know we can at least be friends."

"Talk to Babs," she evaded.

"Starfire, she's my daughter too. I want to be a part of her life. But if her mother can't stand to be around me, that's going to make things hard."

"Please. I cannot answer that at the moment."

"Do you hate me?"

"Do you hate me?" she returned.

"No."

The tears, once quelled, started again. "You do not?"

He shook his head. "I don't. Never did."

"Oh… I thought…"

"I was very angry for a long time," he admitted. "But I never hated you. Not once."

She sobbed. "Oh. Dick."

With a small smile, he dropped his legs from the seat to make room and beckoned. "C'mere."

She came, blanket and all, creeping to him as though she expected him to turn on her any moment. As if she didn't believe she didn't deserve to be hated. He snuggled her against his chest, his back to the window and hugged her.

"What are we going to do?" she whispered.

He kissed her hair. "You said a few months, we can use that time to get to know each other again so we can be parents to this little one. I'll talk to Babs. We'll figure something out together."

* * *

_**Author's Note:** Some of you got close in your reviews (some of you were right on and one person picked up a different plotline without even getting all the clues damnit) and I know I trolled you and made you question when I asked 'how'. I wanted to see if anyone knew this was a bone fide process or not =D_


	12. Confusion

**_Confusion_**

"She's _what_?"

"Pregnant," Dick said, running his hands through his hair. It was sticking up everywhere, the nervous habit being forefront in his actions today. He'd come straight to Babs' place. After handing Starfire over to Raven, he'd borrowed the T-Ship and hightailed it to Gotham with the promise he'd be back soon and they can talk to the Royal Guards.

Starfire was right, he needed to talk this out with Babs. He'd probably go to Bruce next. "With my child. I only just found out."

"And _when_ did this happen?" Babs asked, her voice rising. "If you just found out— did you fuck her while I was in hospital?"

His head whipped around to see her. "What? No!"

"Oh, it was _after_ you kissed me then?"

"I _didn't_—"

Babs scowled. "I knew she was a conniving bitch, but this really takes the cake. She gave you up, she's got no right to trap you now—"

"Stop it. Where's this coming from?" he asked, bewildered by her vehemence.

"How could you do this to me?" she blurted. "You couldn't even wait—"

"Babs, that's not—"

She thumped both hands down on the armrests of her wheelchair. "Why the hell did you kiss me if you're just going to go back to her now?"

"Hey, you were the one who said I needed closure."

Babs thrust her hand toward the door. "Get out!"

"She got pregnant at eighteen!"

Babs paused, her pointed finger trembling. "What?"

"It's called diapause, the ability to put a pregnancy on hold. I haven't been with Starfire in years and I can't _believe_ you would just jump to that conclusion without hearing me out."

Her hand dropped until it rested on the wheel of her chair. "I don't believe you."

"This is _Starfire_," Dick reminded her. "She's alien, remember? All sorts of different biological processes going on."

"And you really expect me to believe she's hid a pregnancy from you for _seven_ years."

"Yes! She was more concerned with your feelings than her own. She said she didn't want to come between us."

Babs snorted.

Dick scowled, Babs' anger leaking over to him. "Stop it."

"It _will_ come between us," Babs said. "A baby? Dick, you're having a baby with another woman and you expect me to be _okay_ with that?"

"It's not like we're dating."

"Oh, smart move there," she spat.

"What do you expect me to do?" Dick ground out. "You haven't even had all the facts yet."

She folded her arms on her chest. "Fine. Give me these facts. What lies did she tell you? You realise she's doing all this just to get you back?"

"She's not," Dick insisted.

"Did she give you the line about Tamaranian love being eternal?"

Dick frowned, filing that piece of information away for later. "No."

She scoffed.

"Babs, they will _kill_ her if she goes back to Tamaran pregnant."

Babs' brow furrowed in confusion.

"More to the point, she'll _let_ them kill her. Tamaranians lose all their powers when they breed. She's carried this baby for so long, it's part of her now. She won't give that up. If she doesn't go forward with the pregnancy now, if I don't _protect_ her while she's pregnant, they'll cart her back to Tamaran and she'll die. I won't let that happen."

"I don't understand."

"Galfore _died_, that's why she was blowing things up. They were coming to retrieve her, force her back to Tamaran. She's so scared, Babs, but she _wants_ this baby, she's always wanted it and I have to help her."

"She gave you up!"

"Pregnant at eighteen! What would you have done?"

"I certainly wouldn't have put it on _hold_!"

"Why are you getting so angry?" Dick asked.

"Because you're running back to her," Babs snapped.

"I'm not running anywhere!"

"She calls, you run. Nothing is ever going to change that."

"I'm trying my best here! Do you think I planned this?"

"No, I think _she_ did. Look at how easily you believed her!"

"You're her friend, why are you acting like this?"

"Why are you even here?" she snapped. "Do you need my _permission_?"

"What is going on?"

"What's going on is I'm never going to be able to compete with her, am I? You're going to choose her over me—"

"I'm not choosing anyone!" he growled. "I came here for advice, to talk to you, not to be grilled and yelled at for something I haven't done." He ran a hand through his hair. "Look. She got pregnant when we were dating. If she'd told me back then, I would've done the right thing and helped her. I'm still going to do the right thing now and help her. But I wasn't planning on getting back together with her."

"You're still in love with her," Babs reminded him.

"Starfire and I are two different people now," he said. "Regardless of past feelings, I'm not about to fall back into a relationship with her. Babs, I want to be with _you_."

She scrunched up her face as though she'd tasted something sour. "You say that _now_," she said. "Will you feel the same way when you start seeing her all the time because she's pregnant? After she has your child? You said she loses her powers, right?"

"Yeah."

"And that the people from her planet are going to try and kill her?"

"Yeah."

"Then, I know _exactly_ what's going to happen. You're going to ship her to Bludhaven so you can watch over her. You and her, in that small apartment, even an idiot can see where that'll end up."

"You think I'll cheat on you," Dick said flatly.

"Since we're not in a relationship, it's a bit hard to cheat on me, isn't it?" she told him scornfully.

"Babs—"

She wheeled herself backward. "You need to go," she said. "Before I say something I regret."

"Why are you pushing me away all of a sudden?" Dick asked, walking after her. He could have grabbed her chair to keep her there, but he knew that would be the wrong thing to do.

"I'm not."

"You are," he insisted. "We don't even know what we're going to do just yet. That's why I'm here, talking to you. Starfire wants you involved in the decision making process."

"I don't want to be involved—"

"You're pushing me away. Do you want me to go back to Starfire, is that it? Are you so scared of your own feelings you'd rather that than face them?"

"What I _want_?" she spat. "This has never been about what I want. I've _always_ been a backup for Starfire."

"That's not true!"

"You saw her at the Fashion Week, realised you hadn't got a chance in hell in getting back with her and rebounded to me. I'm not going to be that girl, Dick. I'm not going to pine around and wait for you to fall in love with her again. Yes, I like what we have. We have a good solid friendship, and we'll probably keep that. Now, you got her. Go keep her."

"I don't want—"

"You don't owe me anything. We're not invested in a relationship and you're having a baby with another woman. You need to focus on that, not me."

"What do you expect me to do?! Do you want me to let her raise my child by herself?"

"No!"

"Do you want me to let her go back to Tamaran and die?"

"Of course not!"

"Then what? What do you want me to do?"

"It's far too convenient, if you ask me."

"Don't you think I know that? I'm trying my best here!"

"Really? It doesn't seem like it—"

"You're just trying to project your own insecurities—"

"I'm trying to protect myself," Babs said, her voice cracking. "At least give me dignity in that respect." She shook her head, and rolled away into her bedroom and Dick heard the lock snap.

Not wanting to end this conversation so soon, he went and rested his forehead against the door. "Babs—"

"Go away, Dick."

"Just give me a sec, would you? Starfire having my child doesn't have to change anything between us. You don't have to break us up before we've even had a chance to be together. I know you're scared and I am too, but this is a really unique situation and we can make this work. Just think about this, please?"

There was silence on the other side of the door.

Dick sighed. "Okay, I'm going. Call me when you want to talk."

Babs didn't reply and with a heavy heart, Dick let himself out.

Bruce didn't have much to say when Dick spoke to him, doing a better job of explaining the situation than he had with Babs. Bruce sat silently, taking everything in Dick said with nods and questions in the right places.

"Well?" Dick asked. "What do you think?"

Bruce rubbed his chin. "Starfire made a wise decision, holding off her pregnancy."

Dick frowned. "What do you mean?"

"What are you going to do?"

"Help Starfire and raise a child," he said immediately.

Bruce raised an eyebrow. "Can you say for sure you would've had the same reaction when you were eighteen?"

Dick considered. "I'd like to think so," he said. "I would've stood by her." He ran a hand through his hair. "But I certainly wouldn't have had all the opportunity I've had."

"No."

"I probably would've resented those missed opportunities."

"Probably."

"I'm better equipped to provide for a child now."

"Indeed."

He shuddered out a sigh. "Babs is angry at me."

"Are you surprised?"

"No. Not really. I mean, it's understandable, but it's not my fault. She doesn't seem to get that."

"Give her time," Bruce suggested. "We'll stand with you, no matter what you decide, but ultimately, whatever you do next is up to you and Starfire. "

Dick narrowed his eyes. "Honestly, I thought you'd try and talk me out of it? You know, 'it's a big change, a lot of responsibility'. Lecture stuff. "

"Do you want me to?" Bruce asked, reaching for his coffee mug.

"No."

"Then why waste my breath?" Bruce replied with a small smile. "You've already made up your mind."

Dick nodded.

"There's really only one thing to consider," Bruce said.

"What's that?" Dick asked.

"Which egos are having a child?"

Dick made a round trip, heading down to Bludhaven to shower, pick up a suit and grab some food, before flying back to Jump with overnight clothes. He called in sick for the shift he was supposed to start the next morning, just to give him a little more time discussing the situation with Starfire.

Bruce's words troubled him. Who was going to have the baby? Dick or Nightwing? And with Kory or Starfire? It wasn't like they could hide Starfire away, but Kory had vanished, for her to come back pregnant now… and what kind of pressure would that put on the child? If they were anything like Starfire and _floating_ within a few hours of birth, how would they explain that? Add to that Starfire and Nightwing were well known _not_ to be an item anymore and had nothing to do with each other for years.

Which left Dick and Starfire…

Which… was plausible. They had a few months. They could build up something, couldn't they? And they'd already met in an informal setting, the pin Starfire gave him at the party a few weeks ago would be the perfect cover. And when Raven teleported him to Jump, it'd been as Dick. Not that he expected any of the press to have had long lensed cameras, if they did, they could use that…

He wanted to be in her life. He wanted her daughter to be _his_ daughter.

And he wanted to be with Babs. Could Babs learn to accept a half human-half Tamaranian baby which was his and not hers? Did he have the right to ask her to?

What would happen if, as Dick and Starfire, their daughter wanted to be a superhero too? Nightwing would be needed to protect her… Uncle Nightwing perhaps?

It was all so confusing. So many questions.

Beast Boy and Raven were snuggled up on the couch together in the common room watching a movie when Dick got back to the Tower and Cyborg sat beside them, giving them a little space. Cyborg glanced over his shoulder and waved at Dick, pointed down beside him, then held his finger to his lips.

Dick nodded. Starfire must be snuggled up next to Cyborg, probably asleep. Putting his bag down by the door, Dick joined his friends on the couch.

The movie was interesting, but Dick didn't really watch it, his mind caught up in turmoil. Raven kept casting him glances and Dick realised she must be sensing him.

Starfire remained asleep and snuggled up by Cyborg. Dick used some of the time to study her. It felt like he hadn't just looked at her in years. Her face had become more angular, her hair was like a waterfall of red, cascading down her body. The curves she'd always had were more pronounced. And rings under her eyes. A sadness to her face, even in sleeping.

The movie finished and the five of them remained sitting as they were.

"Hey, B," Dick said after a while.

Beast Boy tilted his head from Raven's lap so he can see him better. "Yeah?"

"Do you know what diapause is?"

"Sure," Beast Boy replied. "It's something animals do. Delay development of their babies until the environment is favourable for growth. Like through winter, or maybe if they get pregnant when already having a litter. Pretty common in insects. Rats, some deer, some types of bear… um kangaroos too. It's a pretty broad meaning though."

"Right," Dick nodded. "Thanks."

"Interesting," Raven said.

"I'm a wealth of knowledge," Beast Boy grinned.

"Must be that degree in biology," Cyborg teased.

"Must be," Beast Boy agreed, rolling his eyes. "Can't be because I've been those animals at all."

"You've been male animals," Raven pointed out.

"Some things are instinctive," Beast Boy replied. "Like some animals can see the females of their species, or smell them, and know whether or not they're fertile or if they've been fertilised, diapause or no."

"Hmm," Dick said. That was probably why Starfire suggested that the other Tamaranians would know.

"Why the question?" Cyborg asked. "Seems like a strange one to just come up with out of the blue."

Dick's eyes flashed to Starfire for a moment. "No reason. Just heard the word, that's all. Have you guys noticed how cold Starfire is? Or is it just me?"

They all exchanged glances. "Cold?" Cyborg asked. He peered down at Starfire and picked up one of her hands, pressing it to his face. "Oh… wow… she's freezing."

"Maybe it's just a side effect from the alcohol," Beast Boy suggested.

"Except she'd be over that by now," Raven mentioned. She nudged Beast Boy's head as she silently asked him to lift up, before going down on her knees in front of Starfire and taking her hand from Cyborg. "Odd."

"I'm metal, I can't feel skin temperature," Cyborg said. "She's been just as snuggly as ever. I didn't notice anything."

"Starfire doesn't touch me," Raven replied and her eyes filled with power. "I'm not sensing any trouble with her circulation or anything else out of the ordinary."

"Only time she touches me is when I'm in animal form," Beast Boy added. "Fur and stuff."

Dick frowned, Raven's words troubling him. Reaching over, he placed his hand on Starfire's shoulder, intending to wake her up. "Star—"

"Woah," Raven said. "Her hand just got hot."

Concerned, Dick lifted his hand away from Starfire and asked, "When was the last time she had a physical?"

Cyborg and Raven looked at each other. "Umm…"

"Do one," Dick ordered. "Right now."

"That is not necessary," Starfire mumbled.

Cyborg ignored her and activated his arm console, while Raven's eyes flooded again.

"I beg to differ," Dick said.

Starfire blinked open her eyes, still hazy with sleep. "You are back?" she asked, looking confused.

"I'm back."

Raven's eyes returned to normal. "I'm not detecting anything out of the ordinary."

Starfire woke up properly. "Please, do not concern yourself," she said, shying away from everyone. "I am fine."

"Not according to my scans," Cyborg said and frowned at his arm.

"Cyborg, stop," Starfire said, alarmed.

"When were you going to tell us?" he asked.

She skittered away from him and crashed into Dick. Startled, Dick wrapped his arms around her, holding her back to his chest. His attention focused on Cyborg, not Starfire, wondering what had Cyborg so concerned.

"What are you detecting?" Raven asked.

"Blastocyst. Early stage."

Raven powered up once more, her attention on Starfire. "I'm not sensing—"

"There's no sign that it's alive, there's no division of cells. But her body's not rejecting it, it seems to be holding it."

Well, that confirmed the truth about the pregnancy, but Dick still didn't know how he felt.

Beast Boy twisted around to stare. "Star's diapaused?"

Dick remained silent, his arms tightening around Starfire. Was it just his imagination or did Starfire completely relax against him?

"With who?" Beast Boy asked. "Who's the…" His eyes widened. "_Oh_."

Dick took a breath and let it out slowly, looking away from all of them. It was admission enough.

"You didn't know," Raven murmured, studying him. Her eyes flicked to Starfire. "How _could_ you?"

Cyborg shared a wary look with Beast Boy.

"Dick," Starfire whimpered. "Please release me."

He jerked at the tone in her voice, she sounded so pained. The moment he released her, Starfire bolted to the door and fled the room.

"What was that?" Raven asked.

"I don't know," Dick said, standing. "But I'll find out."

"Dick, what's going on?" Raven called after him.

"It's… complicated." He ran a hand through his hair. "I'll explain when I can wrap my head around things, okay?" Hesitating at the door, he called over his shoulder. "See if you can get hold of Donna, ask her if she's noticed anything odd about Starfire lately."

"Like being cold?" Cyborg asked.

"Yeah. Like that. Or anything else she can think of." The door swished shut behind Dick as he went to hunt down Starfire.

When he got to her room, the window was wide open, the curtains fluttering in the breeze and Starfire was gone.

* * *

_**Author's Note:**__ I forgot to mention that diapause is a bone fide process mammals and insects go through on Earth. The longest known case is nineteen years, I believe. Certain conditions have to met before diapause ends. There are a few types, diapause being the overarching name of the process._ _Everything Beast Boy mentions is true (I figured he would know), but it's not all species of those animals, just particular ones. Bears are in there because they often hold off a pregnancy until they hibernate. Roe deer do it too. Lots and lots of insects (butterflies and silk worms for example diapause in the cocoon until particular conditions are met for metamorphsis). It's a very complex process. Some diapauses will only last a few weeks, others can be years. _


	13. Flee

**_Author's note: _**_I said it once, I'll say it again. DO NOT BASH CHARACTERS. Several anons were deleted, so if yours isn't there, you know why. A few people who PMed/Reviewed were snapped at. _

_Babs' reaction last chapter was completely human. Dick and Babs have been slowly building something. Dick seems to be getting over Starfire. Then Starfire comes back with this cock-and-bull story about being pregnant and maintaining it through a process Babs has never heard of. What is Babs to think? All of a sudden all her insecurities about Dick and her relationship (or potential relationship) are thrust in her face. She might have wanted Dick and Starfire to sort things out, yes, but have a baby together? No woman in their right mind would be happy about that when first hearing the news, no matter what. She reacted out of anger. She called Starfire names. She might feel guilty and regret it later, but at this point in time she's angry and she's entitled to that anger and Dick knows that._

_C'mon. Most of you have been following me long enough to know I treat characters as fair as I can and I expect the rest of you to do the same. No one is ever completely to blame. They all have regretful moments or moments where they are jerks to others._

_I do not care if your Babs/Dick or Kory/Dick or even Babs/Kory/Dick. Do not lash out at a character just because they don't fit your OTP'ness. And don't, for the love of X'hal, read me without an open mind and open heart. _

_(Oh, RedCapesAreCool, yours isn't there because SPOILERS Dude =D I actually meant to do a lovely reply but really it all ends up as SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS and don't ruin it for others.)_

* * *

**Flee**

Starfire wasn't hard to locate. She had an apartment in Jump, a small modest place of her own so she didn't have to live at the Tower all the time. She still kept her room at the Tower— they all had one so if there was an emergency and they needed to catch a few hours sleep or a shower and a change of clothes, it could be done.

Nightwing would be noticed in Jump, he always was when he came back here, so Dick thought it would be a good idea to go as himself.

He could hear noises beyond the blue door of Starfire's apartment, but he couldn't make out what was going on. When he knocked on the door, the noises ceased. Placing his hands on either side of the frame he leant close to the door so the sound would carry through the wood better. "Star, it's me."

A soft footfall from inside, close to the door.

"I know you're in there."

It was incredibly awkward standing outside her door, waiting for her to decide if she was going to answer.

"I'll pick the lock," he warned.

The door to Starfire's left clicked, an eye peering through the crack. Great, nosy neighbours, maybe coming in civvies wasn't such a good thing. Dick nodded to the older woman hiding behind the chain on her door. "Afternoon, ma'am."

He turned back to Starfire's door. "Please let me in."

"She ain't home. She's in Paris."

Dick sighed, resting his forehead on the door. "She's home."

"If you break in, I'll call the cops."

Dick reached into his back pocket, pulling out his wallet and police badge, which he flashed at the woman, not caring he was outside his jurisdiction. "I _am_ the cops. I'm very worried about her and—" he raised his voice "—I'll break the goddamn door down if I have to."

The chain beyond the door rattled and Dick heard it unlock. Twisting the handle, he was into the apartment before Starfire's neighbour could comment.

She stood in the hallway entrance of her home, standing in the frame of the room directly off to the right.

Dick, having locked the door behind him, looked beyond her into her bedroom and saw the suitcase full of clothes on the bed. "Going somewhere?"

"Yes," she said, spinning on her heel and back into her bedroom.

Ignoring all manners and protocol, he followed her. "Where?"

"Away. Someplace where there are no accusing eyes and people to yell at me."

"Of course they're accusing, Star. What did you think would happen when people found out? What you've done is something _very_ wrong by human standards."

She spun. "But not by mine!"

"I know! Which is why I'm not roaring at you right now!" he yelled. Taking a step back, he clenched his hands into fists and then relaxed as he tried to calm down. "Look, you kept this from everybody. They're going to be hurt. _I'm_ hurt. But you have to face this and move on."

"I do not _want_ to."

"Well, tough."

She shook her head and stalked to her closet, grabbing another handful of clothes, including their hangers, and dumped them in the suitcase. "Not tough," she replied. "I do not have to endure the accusations."

He picked up the clothes she'd just dumped by the hangers, dragging them back to the closet. "You can't run from this."

She took the clothes out again, scowling at him. "Watch me."

"You are not taking my daughter away from me!" He grabbed the hangers and yanked them away from her.

"Yesterday you did not even know she existed!" Starfire yelled back, making a grab for the clothes but he threw them behind him where they clattered into a mess on the floor.

"That's not _my_ fault."

She tried to get around him without touching him but he constantly got in her way. "I cannot stay here. I will not."

"You must have known this would be hard," he snapped.

"It does not have to be," she replied. "I can leave."

"Wouldn't that just make it harder? No friends, no one who understands you. You'll be completely alone—"

"No one on this planet understands me," she declared.

"Because you won't _let_ me."

She turned back to her suitcase, shoving what clothes were already packed tighter in before she closed the lid.

"Starfire, stop—"

"No—"

"I'm trying to make this work—"

"Do you not see? It will never work—"

"We need to try—"

She rounded on him. "I will _not_ trap you into a family you do not want."

"Too late for that, don't you think?"

"Not if I leave."

"And I'll hunt you down and bring you back."

"The universe is very big."

"I'm _very_ good. Friends in high places."

Someone knocked on the door, Dick guessed it was the nosy neighbour. "Is everything alright in there?" the woman called a moment later.

Starfire huffed in anger, shifting her weight from foot to foot. "Yes," she called. "Fine."

"I hear yelling. Do I need to call the cops?"

"It is fine," Starfire called.

"You can't run away from this," Dick said, trying hard to calm down. He knew she was hurting, both from having to reveal her secrets and Galfore's death. All the same, it was hard to keep from being angry.

"Why can you not just leave me alone?" Starfire replied, turning back to her suitcase.

He grabbed her wrist, yanking it away from the zipper. Starfire gasped at the contact and he felt her skin warm beneath his hand. She tried to pull her arm from his grip, backing away from him but he followed her, keeping his hand holding onto her wrist.

"Dick—"

"What is this?" he asked, bewildered.

Her back hit the wall. "Please, let me go."

"What is it? This never happened before." He could almost see the heat flowing up her arm. Her skin glowed. He hadn't realised how pale she had been until he saw the golden sheen returning to it. Her eyes closed and she relaxed. It didn't look like it was hurting her, her expression peaceful and in complete contrast to the anger they shared a few seconds ago.

"Please," she whispered. "It is a warning."

"What kind of warning?"

Her back slid down the wall as she melted and he followed her down. "I have gone too long."

"Too long?" he asked and crossed his legs so he sat on the ground.

"She wants to grow. She calls to you. It gets stronger each time you touch me, soon I will not be able to resist."

He let her wrist go.

Starfire snapped back to herself, scowling at him. "Do not—"

"How long is too long?" he asked.

She dropped her eyes.

"Star, you gotta stop lying to me."

Her eyes flashed to his and she raised her chin indignantly. "I have not lied."

"But you're not telling me the whole truth. I'm trying very, very hard to be understanding but you're pushing me to my limits right now. You're not running away."

"Do you not see?" She tossed her hands up. "It would solve everything."

"Running from your problems doesn't solve _anything_. That's how you got into this mess in the first place."

She huffed.

He tried a different route. "Don't run. Please."

She narrowed her eyes at him.

"Don't take her away," he implored. "I only just found out about her. You took all those years we could have had because you were scared. Don't take her away from me too."

She turned ashamed. "Dick…"

"I want her," he said. "I want her so much it hurts to think you'll take her."

She shook her head. "I will not."

"Promise me you won't."

She reached for him, her fingers hesitating above his hand. "I promise."

He nodded. "Good." Placing his hand on the ground behind him, he hoisted himself up. "I'll give you a minute, I need a drink of water and I don't think this is the sort of conversation which should be conducted in your bedroom."

"Oh," she pulled her hand back. "No. You are correct."

"Kitchen?" he asked from her bedroom doorway.

"End of the hallway."

He nodded and followed it, leaving her in the bedroom. It was a risk, but he didn't think she'll run now.

The apartment was just so Starfire, he had to smile. The living room was painted a deep purple, the kitchen cupboards marbled white. She had several sunflowers in a vase on a table in the middle of the feature wall. She had a wooden table suitable for four people by the large window, in the middle of it sat an eyestalk in a pot with fruits of golden berries. It blinked at him as he walked past. One sofa facing the TV, and a framed doily on the wall. She had a fish bowl of… it looked to be worms in water swimming on the kitchen counter. A diary filled with lots of post it notes and tags, probably her modelling program and a pile of unopened letters sat beside the fish bowl.

Silkie's basket was empty and he wondered where the little guy was.

"I like what you've done to the place," he called as he opened her cupboards in search of glass. He had to open a couple before he found the glasses, extracting two. "Where's Silkie?"

"Gar has him," Starfire said, lingering in the hallway. "I have been away."

"I told Bruce," he said, as he filled up the cups with water from the tap. "I hope that's okay, I needed his advice."

"Oh."

"He said what you did was pretty smart."

"He did?"

Dick carted the glasses to the table. He sat down, placing Starfire's glass in front of the seat opposite. He gestured for her to take a seat. "Yeah. Seems to think that I would've regretted losing all the opportunities I had if you'd gone through with the pregnancy when we were eighteen."

"That was my thought." She crossed over to sit opposite him.

"He posed an interesting question though."

"Oh?"

"Who will the public see having a child. Nightwing and Starfire, Kory and Dick—"

"Kory is gone."

"And Nightwing and Starfire don't have anything to do with each other."

Starfire frowned. "Where does—"

"Well, Dick and Starfire met at Fashion Week. She gave him her pin."

Starfire gasped. "You think I gave you that to—"

"No," he interrupted. "I don't. But it _is_ convenient now. Plus, I think your neighbour heard us. Do you really think she'll keep quiet?"

"But you are with Babs, the press will—"

"The press can think whatever it damn well wants to," Dick said. "We can't control that. I just think we should roll with it."

Starfire considered that, lifting the glass up to take a drink.

"I'd also like you to come to Bludhaven for the pregnancy."

"I do not think that would be—"

"I can't come back to Jump. I'm committed at my job for the next year."

She frowned. "Do you not think I am committed too?"

"I do. I just… I want to be a part of this. I'll help you in whatever way you need, even if it means commuting to Jump every night and sleeping on the couch. I was only asking because your job is more versatile than mine."

"Hmm."

"You don't have to live with me, there's a free apartment in my building. Or we can get you a place somewhere else in the city. You said you needed protecting, that you'd become dependent. Knowing what I know about your people and how you reacted before, I'm guessing touch will be very important."

Starfire flushed.

Dick nodded. "It's one of the things we need to think about."

"I shall… think about it," Starfire said.

"Can you afford to move?" Dick asked, suddenly realising he might be asking too much. "I can—"

"I have been saving for quite some time," Starfire said. "I can afford it. If that is what we decide to do."

"Okay."

Starfire toyed with her glass, watching the water swirl.

"It'll be okay, you know."

She acknowledged that with a nod.

"Just how dependant on touch will you become?"

"Um…"

"Okay, Star?"

She met his eyes. "Yes?"

"We need to make a promise to each other right now."

She went wary. "What sort of promise?"

"We _have_ to be honest with each other. No matter what. Not even if we think we'll hurt each other, we have to say what we're thinking and feeling. We got into this mess because we weren't honest. I don't care if we lie to everyone else through our teeth, we _have_ to be honest with each other."

She considered. "That would be prudent."

"Good, deal then?"

"Deal."

He smiled. "So, touch?"

She gave him a half-smile and shook her head. "You always knew how to manipulate me."

He snorted. "Yeah, I'm good at that."

"In truth, I do not know how dependant I will be. My need might be great or small, I have no idea until we start."

"Will it be sexual?" he asked.

She closed her eyes briefly. "I will not force you to do anything you don't want to do."

"Good, because I'm with Babs," he said. A white lie, the guilt tugged at him especially with the promise he just made but it was necessary. He _would_ fix this with Babs, show her he could keep Starfire purely as a friend. Getting back together with Starfire right now would be for all the wrong reasons.

"I know. I am not looking to rekindle a relationship with you," Starfire said.

"Okay. Good."

"I am glad we understand each other."

"Do you want to know what Babs thought?" he asked, surprised she hadn't asked about what had happened when he'd met with Babs.

Starfire shook her head. "I know her feelings regarding this situation."

Dick narrowed his eyes. "She called you."

Starfire didn't answer that and scratched the table with her nail.

"I'm sorry." That explained Starfire's sudden want to run and babble about accusations, it must have been building for a while.

"She is angry and hurt and has every right to be. I am very sorry to put you both in this situation."

"She said something I wanted to ask you about."

Starfire gave him an expectant look.

"She said Tamaranian love is eternal."

Starfire suddenly found her plant very interesting. "Oh."

"Is it?"

She evaded. "Do you truly want to know?"

And there was the truth of the matter. "Star, I'm sorry, I can't—"

"I know." She smiled, a small, sad, lonely smile. "I do not expect anything more from you than you are willing to give."

"Okay." He hesitated. "We don't have to have sex or something like that to start the process, do we?"

She got the giggles.

"What?"

She buried her face in her arms on the table, her shoulders shuddering as she laughed.

"What'd I say?"

"Oh, Dick, your face." She had tears in her eyes when she looked up. "And you claimed Tamaranians had sex on the brain."

He grinned, then laughed himself. "I was just checking," he complained once she'd caught her breath.

She sat upright and reached back to the kitchen bench for a tissue. "Sure you were." Wiping her eyes, she continued, "No. No sex is required to begin. It will be awkward, there are words we must say and we are required to lie together for a while and the touch will… be intimate on me. But no sex."

"Oh. How intimate?"

"You must rest your hand on my belly while I initiate the process."

"Ahh."

"I am told it is best after… um… after I… um… that is not necessary."

Dick decided not to think about that too much. "Right."

"I shall possibly request to be snuggled on occasion," she continued, not meeting his eyes. "Perhaps at night toward the end, but if you are uncomfortable, please say no."

"Alright."

"I can request Babs' permission first if you would prefer."

"I… let's just see how we go, okay?"

She inclined her head in agreement. "Indeed, I feel we should inform her of any physical interaction which occurs."

"I'm sure…" he frowned as he tried to figure out how to phrase it. "I'm sure she would appreciate your honesty and being kept in the loop like that but I also… I think telling her might be rubbing her face in it a bit."

"Oh."

"We need to… give her time to come to terms with this. Then talk as a group."

Starfire nodded. "Yes. Of course."

"It's going to take everyone a while to understand this."

She tapped her fingers together. "Raven was most angry."

"Just surprised, I think. She's was very keyed into emotions, it was probably just a reaction to that. I'll help you explain things to the others," he said.

"Thank you."

He smiled. "So, what are we going to do about the Royal Guard?"

Starfire grimaced and thumped her head down in her arms on the table. "Ugg."

Dick chuckled. Pointing to the golden berries of the eyestalk plant sitting in the middle of the table he asked, "Are these edible?"

She raised her head. "For me, yes. I do not think your stomach could handle the acidic texture."

He retracted his hand. "Ahh. I see."

"Feel free to try."

"Do you have any human food?"

"Do you wish to try a mouth worm?" she asked with a wicked smile, gesturing the worms in the glass bowl behind her.

"The name implies something not very nice," he replied.

"They shriek." She giggled. "It is amusing to watch people attempt to claim they are open minded enough to try them. They do not realise it is simply food for my gyldaberries."

"You've developed a nasty streak," he said, smiling in approval.

"Models can be most cut-throat. I had to adapt."

"I've heard." He frowned. "What will you do about your career?"

"I have a contract for the next two months," she said. "After that, I shall take the year off and return when I feel it is suitable. I do not foresee difficulties in finding temporary translating work."

"That'd be a good deadline for us then," Dick said. "Assuming your neighbour doesn't spill the beans. Two months would give us lots of time to sort things out."

Starfire nodded. "I agree." She glanced at the clock hanging in the kitchen. "Pizza?"

"Pizza would be awesome."

* * *

**_Author's note 2:_**_ Some certain things are from Teen Titans Go! _

_Also, I had a romance hit this afternoon, there's a whole lot of kiss drabbles on Tumblr. Link to tumblr is in my profile, look under drabbles and kiss meme._


	14. Truth

_**Author's Note:**__ We're going to jump around a bit now, because I didn't feel like writing a lot of filler to get to the bits which needed doing. Sorry, lazy writer =D. We won't jump too fast, don't worry._

* * *

**Truths**.

Cyborg, Raven and Beast Boy sat quietly as Starfire spoke. Demure as she spoke, her hands on her lap, her ankles crossed and not meeting anyone's gaze. Nightwing sat beside her since they'd be heading straight up to the Watch Tower after this to speak with the Royal Guard. Plus, gloves meant he could touch Starfire and not have her react to his presence as strongly. She said it was only skin-on-skin contact that prompted the _teslait'n _to react.

Their friends alternated between staring at the two of them, Nightwing glad he could hide his eyes behind the mask.

"Wow," Beast Boy said, reaching across to take Raven's hand to clutch. "Wow."

"That's…" Cyborg rubbed his head and cleared his throat. "Yeah."

"Why didn't you ever tell us?" Raven asked, straight to the point.

Starfire flicked her eyes to Raven, then back to her feet. "It is…"

"Cultural," Nightwing rescued, slipping his hand between Starfire's to hold and offer comfort. "We forget sometimes Starfire's customs clash with ours. She wanted to give me enough time to experience Earth culture before she shared hers."

She gave him a smile.

"Of course, neither of us knew we'd break up permanently," Nightwing continued.

"So, are you back together now?" Beast Boy asked, eyeing them both and their hands.

"No," Nightwing said.

"A relationship which begins under such circumstances would not be very strong," Starfire murmured. "Considering our past."

"We're trying to remember what we were like as friends," Nightwing continued. "For the baby."

"We still have much to discuss," Starfire said. "And there is Babs to consider—"

Nightwing squeezed her hand. "And various other decisions to make, yeah. But we wanted to let you guys know what was happening, because there needs to be quite a few changes."

Cyborg nodded. "Like Starfire's off the roster as of now."

She jerked. "I do not—"

"No, I agree," Nightwing said.

She bounced on her seat as she swung to face Nightwing. "But I am still capable—"

"It's not about capability—"

"That losing your powers thing has got me worried," Cyborg said. "So, it's about none of us wanting to be responsible if you get hurt and lose that baby." Cyborg grinned, "I wanna be an uncle."

"Me too," Beast Boy said, bouncing excitedly. "It's gonna be so cool, we'll get to teach him so many cool things—"

"Her," Nightwing said, grinning broadly.

"You can tell already?" Beast Boy blurted.

Starfire nodded.

"I hate to be a downer," Raven murmured. "But hybrids, Starfire, you have to know some of them just aren't viable."

Nightwing stiffened. He hadn't thought of that, there was a flare of pain and it was suddenly harder to breathe.

Starfire clasped his hand in both of hers, offering reassurance. "The _teslait'n _does not work if the child is not viable. I would have lost it."

"You're sure?" Raven asked.

"Yes, Galfore and I made certain—" she choked on the name, her eyes flooding with unexpected tears.

Nightwing knew what that was like, being okay one moment, then _remembering_ and the tears would come. He shifted closer, removed his hand from hers so he could hug her. "It's okay."

She turned toward him, both hands covered her face. "_Oh_."

"Hey, fly girl," Cyborg said, reaching across to put his hand on her back. "I'm so sorry."

Beast Boy added himself to the comfort group in the form of a purring kitten on Starfire's lap. And while Raven didn't join in, Nightwing felt her small hand on his shoulder and her presence beside his.

**Royal Guard.**

Nightwing was very glad this encounter would be brief, assuming everything went well. Cyborg and Beast Boy flanked him, while Raven offered herself as a shield for Starfire, standing ahead of her and offset by a step. The five of them had always been formidable when they were together, a familiar feeling of power Nightwing had missed while working alone.

Starfire twitched and wrung her hands as they waited in one of the receiving rooms at the Watch Tower for the Tamaranian Royal Guard to arrive.

"Calm down," Nightwing suggested in a whisper.

"I am trying," she murmured.

"It'll be over soon."

"No. It has just begun."

Raven, fed up with Starfire's wayward emotions, reached back a hand and took Starfire's. A trickle of black energy fled down Raven's arm and up Starfire's, Starfire straightening in response.

"Thank you."

"Don't mention it," Raven said. "We're having girl time tonight. I'll call Donna."

"Aww, what?" Beast Boy asked. "But you just got back from Azarath and I thought—"

She turned her head and raised an eyebrow.

Beast Boy shrunk back and his ears wilted.

"There are things, as her friend and healer, I need to know," Raven said and faced the door again. "I'll rub your belly later."

Beast Boy perked up a little.

"Are you sure you want to do this today?" Nightwing asked. "We can delay."

"I want it over with," Starfire replied.

"I can understand that, but—"

"I am emotionally stable enough for this," she replied. "I can crumple afterward."

Conversation died as the door opened.

The first Tamaranian into the room was a male, whose eyes widened and nostrils flared as he saw Starfire. He had to be nudged into the room by those following him, each of them having a similar nostril flaring reaction to her presence. The last into the room was a male, a head taller than all the rest and his armour adorned with gold instead of silver.

Starfire brightened in reaction. "General V'aan," she said, warmly. "What a surprise."

Nightwing saw Green Lantern slip into the room, standing off to the side. He nodded, Green Lantern's ring would ensure any conversation was clear and prevented the Tamaranians from slipping into their language and leaving the humans out.

The man bowed with his fist to his heart. "Princess Koriand'r. As lovely as ever." He straightened and studied her. "I admit I did not expect to find you in _teslait'n. _This does pose a problem for potential offspring. Still, it is something which can quickly be resolved._"_

Nightwing stiffened at the suggestion.

Starfire narrowed her eyes. "You are the new Grand Ruler?"

"I am."

She bared her teeth. "You murdered my _k'norfka_."

"You bastard," Cyborg snarled.

V'aan eyed the man, then dismissed him just as fast.

Nightwing shifted closer to Starfire, his distaste for V'aan increasing.

"With regret," V'aan said, his eyes back on Starfire. "It was not my intention to take his life. Galfore was an honourable warrior, he wished a warrior death."

"He was a good leader," Starfire snarled. "Why did you defy him?"

"You have been away for a long time, Princess. You have lost sight of what is important."

Starfire curled her hands around her starbolts. "How _dare_ you claim—"

"You have not landed on Tamaranian soil in seven years," V'aan noted. "I claim a great deal."

Starfire smirked. "And yet you seem to think I would be a good match for you."

V'aan looked pointedly at her starbolts.

Starfire laughed, dark and terrible. "No. Go get yourself taken by the Psions if you want them."

"You are obligated—"

Nightwing decided it was time to intervene. "She's not _obligated_ to do anything," he snapped and rested his hand on Starfire's back. She'd told him, if a moment presented itself, it was okay to give the appearance of being a possessive, overbearing father worried for his offspring.

V'aan looked down his nose and Nightwing felt short. "You? She would sully herself with a mere human? Surely you jest."

"A gift, not a shame," Starfire snapped. "I will bear his child."

General V'aan stared are her in horror. "You dilute the house of Tykayl with a firstborn who is less than whole?"

"She will be unique," Starfire said, proud. "Special and loved."

V'aan's eyes flashed green. "I will not allow—"

Starfire went to instant blaze, green energy coating her entire body, including casting her sheen over Nightwing. "_She is mine and you will not take her from me_."

"The Tykayl family line _must_ be pure."

"Then Tykayl _ends_."

"I do not accept—"

"You don't have a choice," Nightwing snapped. "Koriand'r is _protected_."

"By you?" V'aan snapped, sizing him up again. "Who are you to protect?"

Starfire lifted her chin. "This is Nightwing."

"Nightwing is a great warrior," one of the Tamaranians in V'aan's entourage mumbled and Nightwing recognised her as the one asked if Starfire was protected when the group first arrived on Earth.

"Many have spoken his name on Tamaran," another agreed. "As a mere child he defeated many of the palace guards on his journey to prove Komand'r's claim was false and protect Tamaran."

"Koriand'r has always consorted with greatness."

Beast Boy shifted and Nightwing heard him growl. Raven seemed annoyed with the meeting as well, dark shapes moved in the shadows below her feet. Cyborg's arm had dropped to his side, his cybernetics shifting as he itched to create his sonic cannon. Nightwing didn't think it would take much more for all three of them to react.

"She is under my protection," Nightwing continued and then spoke the words Starfire asked him to say. "_X'hal_ as my witness, I will protect her so no one may harm our light."

V'aan looked concerned for the first time since he'd walked into the room.

Starfire's smile was grim. "You may have taken my _k'norfka_ from me. You may rule the planet of my birth, but Earth is my home and _this_ is my family and you are not welcome here."

"Your diplomatic immunity is revoked," Nightwing stated.

Green Lantern stepped forward at that. "Any action you take against Earth and its people—and that includes Starfire— will be an act of war. Please leave our space immediately. I shall escort you out."

Starfire waited until V'aan was at the door. "V'aan?"

He turned, scowling.

Starfire flared again. "Return to Earth and I shall kill you and feed your entrails to my gyldaberries bush which I will then plant on Tamaranian soil soaked in your blood."

"Well, that went better than expected," Beast Boy said as the Tamaranians filed out, V'aan frothing at the mouth in fear.

Starfire took a deep breath and let it out slowly.

"That was a very… specific sort of threat," Raven noted.

Starfire nodded, then smiled sheepishly. "Gyldaberries are a carnivorous plant, they grow to extraordinary size once they have a taste for sentient blood and will consume the unwary. It is… a common threat toward enemies."

"Will there be repercussions?" Nightwing asked, his hand dropping from her back.

"Perhaps," Starfire said. "It depends on how tight V'aan's grip on Tamaran is."

"We'll be ready for them," Cyborg said. "No one's gonna get to you."

"Did you know him?" Nightwing asked.

Starfire inclined her head. "He was one of my father's prodigies."

"That doesn't sound good," Nightwing noted. He didn't need to ask if she'd follow through with her threat, he knew better than that. It was a Tamaranian matter.

Raven ghosted closer to Starfire. "Are you okay?"

"No," she replied. "But I will be." She sighed. "I am most exhausted. Please, I think I would like to return to my home and sleep."

Nightwing pressed his lips together. He didn't want to leave her alone right now. If she decided she still wanted to run, there would be no one to stop her. Plus, he'd just pledged to defend her and he didn't trust V'aan in the slightest.

"I'll stay with you," Raven suggested.

"I am fine."

"You're not," Nightwing said, studying her.

"Raven, you should spend time with Beast Boy and Cyborg, you have the date with Bumblebee."

"If you think we're going to leave you alone—" Cyborg began.

"I'll stay with her," Nightwing said. "She won't be alone."

Starfire shot him a wary look. "You do not—"

"Your couch looked comfortable," he said, shrugging. "I won't be in the way."

"I will stay with her," Raven said, matter-of-fact. "End of discussion. We'll talk and do girly things and cry and Beast Boy can go on runs for late night ice-cream."

Starfire was slow to smile, realising she wasn't going to get time alone no matter how much she might want it. "Okay."

As they walked to the T-Ship so they could head to the Tower, Raven pulled Nightwing aside. "I'll make sure she doesn't run. I know you're worried about that."

Nightwing nodded. "Thanks."

"You need to find someone to talk to," Raven suggested. "Or someone to get drunk with. Something."

"I'm fine."

"Uh-huh. Empath. Do it."

"I'll take him out," Cyborg said, overhearing. "Bee'll understand." He thumped his hand down on Nightwing's shoulder. "Guys night."

"Take Gar too," Raven suggested. "He'll complain if he misses out." She gave Nightwing a stern look. "Even if you don't talk about what's happening, you need to do this."

Nightwing knew when to admit defeat. "Yes, Mom."

Raven narrowed her eyes. "I'll leave the window unlocked," she said with a sigh. "Don't crowd her right now."

Raven knew him far too well. "Thanks."

Shaking her head at him, Raven headed off to join Starfire.

"When did she get so bossy?" Nightwing asked Cyborg.

"She's trying on her Aunty Rae hat," Cyborg said, grinning and squeezed Nightwing's shoulder. "Let's go get changed and see what liquor Star left us with."

Nightwing nodded. "I'll call Wal."

"Guess we'll be hitting the snacks shop and the liquor store then," Cyborg laughed.

**Boy's Night.**

"That's what she said," Wal laughed and whacked the table to emphasise the punch line of his joke.

Dick groaned and covered half his face with his hand. "That was terrible."

Cyborg thumped his hand down on Dick's shoulder. "Nah, man, yer jest not drunk 'nuff." He staggered around the table, returning to his seat with a new bottle of scotch.

Dick rolled his eyes. He'd managed to palm off at least half of the drinks Wal and Cyborg had tried to give him, without either of them noticing their drinks were suddenly full again, but there was still enough alcohol in his system to dull the senses.

Which was stupid off him, really, and he knew it, which was why he was trying to keep from getting any more into his system.

Beast Boy, perhaps holding onto the hope of some special time with his lady, had also been declining to drink much for the evening. He winked at Dick as he swapped his full glass with Cyborg's mostly empty one. "How much longer do you reckon they'll last?" he whispered.

"Not long," Dick returned. "Fifteen minutes, tops."

"Do you feel better?" Beast Boy asked.

"No, not really."

Beast Boy smiled. "I didn't think you would. Rae gets ideas in her head sometimes about how a guy should process emotions. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't."

"Hmm."

"We'll do this again once you and Star sort things and you're not worried about V'aan dropping down on our heads."

Dick nodded. "Yeah, that would've been better."

"Really, all this is just a distraction so we're not underfoot." He glanced over at the merrily singing Cyborg and Wal as they belted out 'Daisy, daisy' as loud as they could. "Do you want to talk about it?"

"No."

"Batman strikes again," Beast Boy said, grinning.

Dick gave him a strained smile. "No, it's just… I don't know how I feel and I don't think it'll help to talk about it yet."

"I figured. I'm just covering my bases for when Raven grills me about what you said later."

Dick snorted.

"Do you want to get back with Star?" Beast Boy asked, grabbing a handful of crisps.

"If you'd asked me that a few months ago, I would've said yes. Now, I'm not so sure. Babs and me aside, I don't think we know each other anymore."

"You've got time to figure things out, right? I mean, she's diapaused, right?"

"Her neighbour might have overheard us yelling," Dick said then shrugged. "We're gonna play it by ear."

"Good plan."

"I've asked her to move to Bludhaven."

Beast Boy raised an eyebrow.

"Just for the pregnancy," Dick explained. "Or, I suppose I could get a transfer back to Jump. I don't know."

"Lots of things to think about," Beast Boy said. "We can help you protect her too, you know."

"I know."

"But, hey, you're gonna be a dad."

Dick grinned, his mood uplifting. "I am."

There was a crash as Cyborg fell off his chair and ended up a snoring mess on the floor. Beast Boy and Dick shared a grin as they looked at Wal who was crooning softly to an empty bottle. "One down, one to go."

**Morning.**

Dick threw an arm over his eyes, trying to hide from the light streaming through the curtains. It was too early to wake up. And his bed was lumpy. He shifted his hips, trying to dislodge something soft beneath him, a blanket which had tangled.

"Dick."

Hmm… he could smell freshly brewed coffee. And warm bread. And honey.

Pressure on his chest, shaking him. "Dick, wake up."

He jolted at the contact, his body reacting before his brain was completely awake. His hand shot out, gripping the thing on his chest.

A gasp, then a flowing warm sensation.

Dick's eyes flashed open.

Starfire bent over him, her hair hanging over one mostly bare shoulder. She wore a blue tank top and a small pair of denim daisy dukes. Holding a cup of coffee in one hand, the fingers of her other were gripped by his. She stared at her hand as the golden glow cascaded up her arm.

It took him a moment to figure out what was wrong, why she was staring and immobile. "Oh. Sorry."

She slowly extracted her hand from his chest, blinking a few times, dazzled.

"Star?"

She focussed on him. "Oh. Good morning."

"Morning. Are you okay? You spaced out for a second there."

"Um. Yes." Changing her grip on the cup, she offered him the handle. "Coffee."

"Oh." Swinging his feet over the edge of the couch, he sat up. "Thank you." He took it from her and she backed away. "You didn't have to," he murmured, touched that she would. Little courtesies, he'd forgotten how much they counted.

"And you did not have to sleep on my couch," she said, retreating to the kitchen. "I went to the bakery and brought some bread if you are hungry."

"Ahh, I thought I smelt bread." He scratched his head, yawned and then took a mouthful of coffee. "I don't remember you drinking this."

"Many things about me have changed," she said.

"Yeah, I can see that."

"It is the same for you."

He nodded. "So, what's the glow?"

"It… the _teslait'n? _Did I not explain this?_"_

"I got that part. And that it's caused by skin on skin. But what _is_ it, beyond a warning?"

She sighed. "Most only _teslait'n _for a short period of time. If you go too long… the harder it is to maintain, especially when the father is around. The glow is the… process to begin the pregnancy. My body response to your… ahh… contribution. Elongated touch and it would start without ritual."

"Ahh." He stuffed his hand into his pocket. "No touching. Not until we are ready."

"I would appreciate that." Glancing at the clock, she continued, "I have the go-see in an hour, I need to prepare."

"Oh. Right. Um. Should you be working when…"

She looked at him, her eyes tear bright for a moment. "I need to."

He nodded, knowing he really didn't have a say in the matter. "Just as long as you're going to be okay."

"I will be.""

"We need to—"

"Talk. I know."

Dick stood, stretching and scratching his head again, before he wandered over to the kitchen. Leaning against the table, he took another mouthful of coffee. "When would you—"

"Perhaps… I could come to Bludhaven on Saturday," she suggested. "That would give us ample time to think."

"And see if your neighbour is going to tell."

"Yes."

"Okay, dinner, Saturday. I'll cook."

She threw him a startled look. "Oh, no, I did not mean the date."

Dick's laugh sounded awkward to his ears. "Neither did I."

"Oh." She ran her hand up and down the kitchen bench idly. "Perhaps… if Babs is ready… she should come."

"Yeah," he said, nodding. "I'll ask."

"Okay."

"Okay."

"I must prepare," she murmured.

"I'll… see myself out. Call me if you need anything, okay?"

"Thank you. I will." She hurried for the hallway and then hesitated. "Do you think this… awkwardness will fade?"

"I hope so."

She looked over her shoulder and gave him a brief smile. "I do the hoping too."

**Messages, an extract.**

_"Babs, it's Dick, can you call me please? Star and I really want to talk to you."_

_"Babs, it's been a couple of days. I know you need some time to process but it really would go a lot easier on all of us if you'd just talk to me."_

_"Babs, c'mon. Pick up."_

_"Star's coming on Saturday to discuss… everything, I guess. We both want you there. She can explain things better than I can. Please, call me."_

_"I know you're there. I know you've been getting my messages. I also know you delete them. Talk to me."_

_"Alright, I delayed Saturday to give you more time. Call me."_

_"You can't run from this. It's happening, whether you like it or not. Ignoring it will just make it harder. Please."_

_"Babs. Babs. Babs. Babs. Babs. Babs. Babs. Babs. Babs. Babs. Babs. Babs. Babs."_

_"This is getting ridiculous. Call me."_

_"I haven't done anything wrong, you know. Stop punishing me. Star's asking why we haven't cleared things with you yet and I'm running out of excuses. We need to talk."_

_"This has got to stop. We're adults. Relaying messages through Tim is just juvenile. It's been two weeks already. I tried to give you some space, but enough is enough. If you don't call me tonight, I'm coming over."_


	15. Decisions

**Decisions**

Dick brought Babs flowers, roses were her favourite. White or red, she didn't care, but Dick knew she was particularly fond of yellow. So, yellow it was, the bunch tied up in a ribbon and clutched in sweaty hands.

He spent the whole trip alternating between anger and understanding. He was angry she'd ignored every single time he'd tried to get hold of her over the past two weeks. But he also knew she had a reason behind wanting space.

Enough was enough, however. Starfire and Dick needed to make some decisions and they couldn't while everything was on hold waiting for Babs' thoughts.

Nervous and not sure why he would be, he knocked on the door and waited.

And waited.

Then knocked again.

"Dick, I don't—"

"I'm just here to talk," he said.

"We already said everything we needed to say."

"No, we haven't—"

She unlocked the door and he heard her rolling away from it. Slipping inside, he said, "I brought these for you."

She glanced over her shoulder at him as she headed back to her computer. "Leave them on the bench."

Feeling dismissed, he gently placed the flowers on the bench beside the door and stepped further into the room. "Babs—"

"I'm in the middle of an operation, Dick," she said, hitting a couple of keys on her keyboard. The screens flickered and he saw a camera angle change, Black Canary moving into frame and back out.

He suspected she'd arranged one so she had an excuse. "Why the cold shoulder?"

"I've already said everything I needed to say."

"I haven't, but you won't—"

"Is she having your baby?" Babs asked, her earphones halfway to her head.

"It's not as simple as that—"

She rested them back on her the computer table and twisted the chair so she could see him without turning her head. "Yes or no, Dick. That part is pretty simple."

"I didn't do anything to warrant this—"

She sighed. "I looked up diapause. I talked to Starfire. I believe you both. You're trying to do the right thing, I know. I understand."

Then why did he feel like this was going to end horribly? "Yes, we are, but we really—"

"But we're done."

His stomach dropped so fast he felt sick. "No—"

"I'm serious. A child is _important_. You need to focus on the baby. Not me."

"This isn't fair," he snapped.

She raised her eyebrow. "You really want to speak to me about fair?" she asked pointedly.

He cringed. "I didn't mean—"

"Dick, I get it. I do. You want the best of all worlds. To have everything. I'm sorry, I can't be a part of this. I need to think about myself. It's selfish, I know. And I feel really bad. But I doubt I'll be ready for a relationship for a while and you have a baby to think about."

He was beginning to feel like he was never going to get a word in edgeways with her. "That doesn't mean—"

"I'm not holding you to _anything_," she said. "If something happens between you and Starfire, then it happens. If it doesn't, then it doesn't. Maybe you can have a child together and keep it strictly platonic, I don't know. Good luck to you if you can. But I'm not a 'what if' or a 'we'll see'. I'm not going to hang around and wait."

Dick frowned. "You just said you weren't ready for a relationship and now you don't want to hang around and wait? Which is it?"

Babs waved her hand. "Semantics."

He stared at her in dismay. "You're not even willing to try? To sit down with us and figure things out?"

She shook her head regretfully. "No. I'm not."

"You're making a rash decision based on—"

"You really think two weeks is rash?" she asked. "I've thought about this long and hard. I've shed tears over it. I wanted to be with you, Dick, I did. But I can't come between you and a child."

Past tense, not a good sign. "You won't."

She smiled tightly. "Well, we won't find out will we?"

"Babs—"

"Maybe it would have been different if we'd started something. Maybe a lot of things. But right now, I can bow out without having my heart broken."

"But—"

"This is _my_ choice."

His hand dropped to his side, his heart heavy with regret. "So… that's it?"

"That's it."

"I'll prove to you that Starfire and I will remain friends."

"Do what you gotta do," she said.

"Babs, this doesn't have to end—" He took a step toward her.

Babs rolled backward. "I will throw you out of here if you try anything," she warned. "I can kick your ass with sticks."

He paused.

"You raise that baby," she said, her eyes tear bright. "You raise it well—"

"Her."

"You raise _her_ well," Babs corrected, then smiled. "A girl?"

"Yes, Star said it was."

"You must be so excited."

"I… I think I am." She looked so wistful, he thought maybe for a moment he could get through to her. "You could be—"

"You'll be a _great_ father, you will." One tear spilled over. "But I'm sorry, I can't be part of that journey."

His throat clogged. "Don't do this."

She turned away, her hands deftly repositioning her chair until she faced her computer again and reached for the headphones.

"Babs, _please_."

She hesitated then put the headphones on. "Bye Dick," she said. "See yourself out please." She pressed up button on the keyboard. "How we doing, Dinah?"

With a heavy heart, Dick did the only thing he could and walked away.

Nightwing hit the rooftops and took his emotions out on the crooks who dared to venture out. He understood why Babs felt she had to, he really did, it just was so unfair that she wasn't even willing to _try_. They hadn't even started.

He felt detached. Was that why Babs' words hadn't hurt like he felt they should have? Like they deserved to? He was angry and sad, but it was nothing like the pain he'd felt when he and Starfire ended. Was it because they hadn't started? He hadn't tasted, so he didn't know what he lost?

Maybe it was just denial. If he could show Babs he planned to keep Starfire as a friend, she'd reconsider.

Dick called Starfire the next morning, inviting her over for dinner. He was lucky, she was scheduled to leave on a photo-shoot the following morning and he privately wondered what she had to rearrange to free herself up to come see him.

Looking around his apartment, he spent a little time with basic housework. Alfred made sure all the boys knew how to look after themselves, and while Dick tended to be naturally cleaner than Jason had been, sometimes with the hustle of daily living, the housework was the first to go.

That, and food shopping. His cupboards had various brands of cereal, his daily staple, but not much else. Scratching his head, he wondered what he'd cook for dinner, then decided to just hit the shops and see what was on special at his local butcher.

Chicken, he decided when he saw the specials. Chicken in mushroom sauce with rice. Pie for dessert, Starfire always loved pie. Chardonnay to drink, could Starfire drink wine? Technically, the baby wasn't developing and therefore not pulling nutrients from Starfire and he recalled many occasions where they'd shared drinks during their friend-with-benefits days.

He prepared everything necessary, the food all ready to start cooking as needed, set the table in preparation, showered and changed and settled down to watch some TV before she arrived.

It didn't occur to him until Starfire looked at the set table in surprise that he'd gone to a lot of effort for something which was supposed to be just a discussion.

"Ummm… it's not what it looks like."

She dragged her eyes from the table to him. "Is Babs coming?"

He wondered how she could miss the fact there were only two place settings on the table. "Um. No."

"Then, this is Alfred's influence."

He laughed, sheepish. "I guess so."

She removed the small backpack she carried. "I may have startled some of your neighbours when I landed."

"They'll get used to it," he said with a shrug.

"I brought zorkaberry pie," she said, pulling out a small box. "I know you have not had it in a while."

Dick grinned and took the box from her to leave on the bench. The box was warm, the pie was probably just fresh out of the oven. "Oh! Great! I haven't had one of these in years."

"I had to bake two," she said, smiling. "Silkie stole the first one."

He laughed. "Trust Silkie. He knows a good thing when he sees one."

She left her bag hanging on the coat rack by the door and placed her hands in the back pockets of her jeans. "May I ask why Babs is not coming?"

Dick busied himself by taking the food he'd prepared out of the fridge so he could start cooking. "Babs has decided she doesn't want to be a part of this."

"But," Starfire sounded bewildered. "I do not understand—"

"She says I need to focus on the baby."

"Dick—"

"Just leave it," he said, wanting to avoid the surge of disappointment the whole ordeal flooded him with. "We have other things to worry about."

"Did you break up?" she asked.

"We… put things on hold," he said. "Just for the interim."

"I am sorry."

Grabbing the frying pan, he did his best to be nonchalant. "Yeah, well… thanks."

"May I help?" she asked.

He glanced over his shoulder at her and smiled. "Nah, I got this."

She wandered around his apartment with her hands behind her back. "Are all the apartments in this building the same?" she asked.

"Yeah," he said as he worked. It wasn't hard to see what Starfire was doing. "I think the ones on the top have three bedrooms plus study instead of two. Feel free to look around."

She poked her head into the main bedroom. "Balcony?" she asked.

"No. Sorry. Not mine at least. The ones on the other side have a small one."

"Rooftop access?"

Leaving the chicken to cook, he joined her by leaning on the wall beside the door of his bedroom. "Yup. There's not much up there." He glanced inside his room, glad he'd cleaned up. "It's not fancy, but I like it."

She nodded. "It is lovely." She rested her fingers on the framed picture of the five of them he'd hung between the doors to his bedroom and the second bedroom/gym. "It is what I always envisaged you having."

"Yeah, it suits me."

"What is the bathroom like?" she asked.

"Generic," he replied. "Bath's a plus though."

Starfire laughed.

"So, what are you thinking?" he asked as she looked into his study.

"I have been looking at opportunities in Gotham and Bludhaven," she replied.

"Really?"

She nodded. "Do not be too eager, I am simply valuing my options. You were right; it would be easier for me to move."

Dick nodded and headed back to the kitchen to check the food. "The neighbours are quiet and no one really cares what happens in the alleyway beside us. The street's full of vacant apartments, if you don't want to live here."

"One step at a time," she said, smiling.

"Sorry." He put the rice in the cooker and set about making the sauce. "So, tell me what a Tamaranian pregnancy is like."

Starfire sat down on his couch. "Well, according to my research, it is very similar to a human pregnancy in relation to time. We need less time, thirty-five weeks to incubate, but that does not seem to be much of a difference. "

"Good to know. Do you lose your powers straight away?"

"No, it is gradual draining over the course of about two weeks," she said. "And my powers may fluctuate while pregnant but it is safer to presume I will not have access to them at all."

"And it's everything? No strength or flight or eyebeams?"

"There are some cases of flight being maintained," she said, thoughtful. "As that uses the least energy. I may be different since I hold more energy than the average Tamaranain."

"So we just won't know until we start?"

She nodded.

Dick sighed. "Here, come stir the sauce."

She bounded to her feet and headed over to help. He showed her how he wanted the sauce stirred, then checked on the chicken and rice.

"Would you like a drink?" he asked. "I brought some Chardonnay."

"Sounds glorious."

He fetched the two wine glasses on the table and, after pouring a little of the wine into the sauce while Starfire stirred, he poured them both drinks.

"About this dependency thing…" he said as he offered her a glass.

"Oh, yes," Starfire said, taking the glass from him and being very careful not to touch. "As you are aware, I am most dependent on my powers for flying, lifting things."

"To the point you don't know your own strength."

"Indeed. When a Tamaranian loses her powers, we are essentially human. I am told it will be most disorienting. I will… most likely require assistance acclimatising. While on Tamaran, I would need my partner to hunt as well as carry me and protect me. On Earth," she smiled, "You have this wonderful invention called 'stairs' and the mall of shopping so I can provide for myself."

Dick laughed. "So, you'll need help opening nasty jam jars and carrying shopping."

She giggled at the joke.

"I assume there's more than that," he said and took a sip of his wine. "Or you wouldn't have mentioned me specifically. You could've done that with the other Titans."

She nodded. "My feeling of safety will be tied directly into your presence. I may become skittish or overly aggressive toward others. I will be calmer around you."

"How's that work?" Dick asked, curious.

Starfire reached for him, her fingers hovering over his collar before she brought her hand back to touch her own collar. "Scent. I associate yours with the baby's."

"Interesting. Is that related to being feline descendant?"

She nodded.

"Hmmm… would it be easier for you if, when I'm not around, you had something that smelt like me?"

She hesitated. "Like what?"

Dick shrugged. "A shirt or something?"

She looked startled and stopped stirring the sauce to stare at him. "You… you would not mind?"

"No."

"But… that is… Earthen culture dictates that kind of clothes sharing is reserved for—"

"You're not human," Dick said and took the wooden spoon from her so the sauce wouldn't burn. "And neither will our daughter be completely human. We have to make allowances for both cultures. If it would make things easier on you, then I don't mind."

She gaped at him, speechless. It took her a few moments to recover. "Thank you. I would appreciate it."

"Not a problem." He thought silently for a moment, then checked on the chicken. Judging it nearly done, he poured the sauce over the top and left it to simmer. "We need to decide who is having a baby."

"As in egos?" Starfire asked.

"Yes."

She turned and rested the small of her back against the edge of his kitchen bench. "What do you suggest?"

He spread the fingers of one hand and shrugged. "I'm at a loss for that one. Pros and cons?"

"If you were listed as father, people could come at me through you," Starfire said.

"They wouldn't get very far."

"I know," she acknowledged. "However, it is a concern."

"My concern would be my Nightwing enemies coming at you when you were pregnant."

She considered that. "Hmm. They would be stupid to."

"I agree, but villains aren't always smart."

"I should hope my reputation would help. As long as we did not make my lack of powers common knowledge, I do not foresee a problem."

"True. Here's a pro, if she were listed as my daughter, she could attend public school when she was older."

Starfire tilted her head. "She could not as Nightwing's daughter?"

"She could, but I think it might make things a little more difficult. There would be pressure to disclose who Nightwing was."

"Does the Superhero Protection Act not protect that?"

"Yeah. But I don't fancy going to school concerts or recitals in uniform. I kind of feel it'd be better as ourselves, you know? That way I don't have to be in uniform all the time around her, and you don't have to have a ring."

Starfire smiled as she thought about that. "But as ourselves, we would need to establish a relationship, yes? Unless you intend her to be the result of a one night stand?"

He lifted his glass to her. "Welcome to the first 'date'."

She clinked her glass with his. "Very sly, Mr Grayson."

He smiled. "Everyone who mattered would know the truth, of course. Or as close as possible. I think we can leave some details out. But the media would just see a whirlwind romance which ended in pregnancy."

"And… then?" she asked.

"Two people trying to make the best of a situation, I guess."

"To make that work, would we need to appear as a couple?" she asked, her eyes on the floor now.

"You mean, fake some dates for the press?"

"Yes."

"No. I don't think so." Leaving his glass on the bench, he checked the chicken. "How much in the public's eye are you normally?"

"My personal life has very little scrutiny… outside Jump anyway."

"Same with mine." He picked up his wine glass again and took a sip. "I think we'll be big news for a while, then it'll die down."

She nodded. "I think I could cope with that."

"What's going to happen after?" he asked, staring at the contents of his glass.

"After?"

"After she's born."

Her brow furrowed. "I do not understand."

"Do I get to help you raise her? Do I get to be a proper dad to her? Or will it just be visits?"

Starfire pushed away from the bench. She pinched the fabric of his sleeve and tugged to get him to look at her. "I promised I would not take her from you."

"I know. But, if you're only around for the pregnancy... I don't know I could go back to never speaking or seeing… her. Fathers don't have a lot of rights on Earth, what if we can't get along? I can't force you to let me see her. I want to know that I'll be allowed to be a part of her life—"

"Dick, I can fly. Chances are, so will she. No matter where I was, where she was, all you would have to do would be to ask to see her." Her smile was sad. "Parenthood is revered upon Tamaran… but unfortunately, most of our offspring are raised by _k'norfkas_. Our children share a closer bond with them than we do with our parents. I look forward to being a parent most of all. To hug and cuddle her. To read her stories and play the peek-of-boo." She tugged his shirt again. "I expect her to be mothered by Alfred. I expect her to be the spoiled rotten by Bruce. I expect her to have so many honourary aunts and uncles she will never be without love." She smiled. "I expect our daughter will be taught to fly regardless of whether she can or not."

He smiled, touched. "Thank you."

"Besides," she continued. "We seem to be acting most civil toward one another at present."

"Yeah, we do."

She placed her hand on his chest, over his heart. "No matter the relationship we have, Dick, _you_ are her father. I will not come between that."


	16. New Beginnings

**_Author's Note:_**

_I've decided to call this story "The one where Dick has to choose between two pies."_

_In honour of all my other pie themed stories, The one with all the pie, the one where we touched the pie, the one where Silkie eats the pie, the one without the pie, the one where Robin analysed the pie, the one where the pie was an object, the one where Starfire used the pie to get into Robin's pants, the one we waited for the pie… you get the idea._

_The next few chapters are going to jump a lot. Mini-chapters, if you will. Think of it like a movie montage, music's playing, there's no dialogue and people are shown to be doing stuff. Yeah. Like that._

_Only better. _

* * *

**New beginnings**

Within two weeks, Starfire called Dick to tell him she'd decided to rent an apartment a few buildings over from him. She'd thought about doing the same building as his, but ultimately decided she wanted a balcony for her plants and then confessed she worried that they might crowd each other if they lived in the same building. Her place was within walking distance, it would take him no less than a few minutes from his to hers (he timed it).

She was still with the same modelling agency as before, busily lining up go-sees in Gotham and Bludhaven and she was confident she'd find work.

They still hadn't decided exactly when they would start the pregnancy, but they both felt the day was looming closer.

A week after that, he helped her move.

Silkie had been let loose on Dick's apartment while Starfire's place was packed. Dick didn't think the little guy would do much damage, but knowing how prone Silkie was to mischief, Dick hid most of his electrics.

Herald's presence had been requested later on in the day to open a portal between Starfire's old place and her new one and make things a little easier on everyone, but all Starfire's items still needed to be packed into boxes to make them easier to move in bulk.

She'd been packing things up since she'd decided to move, all her clothes in boxes and suitcases in the corner and half her kitchen in boxes. When Dick and Tim arrived via Raven, Cyborg and Beast Boy were busy shifting furniture into a neat pile in the corner and Starfire was in the bathroom packing.

"Hello the house!" Tim called in greeting.

Starfire popped out of the bathroom, grinning broadly. "Tim!" she exclaimed, darting through the air to gather him up and spin him in a circle. "Greetings!"

Tim laughed. "Hi Star!"

"Oh, you did not have to come," she said, planting him back on his feet. "My home is in shambles! What must you think?"

"He's here to help," Dick explained.

"Someone promised me pizza at the end," Tim said with a jerk of his head toward Dick.

"There better be pizza all around," Beast Boy said as he carted two chairs to the corner.

"Hmm," Cyborg hummed, pulling a painting off the wall so he could wrap it. "Pizza."

"There's a pretty nice shop around the corner from us in Blud," Dick said. "Once everything is moved, I'll go grab us a couple." He clapped his hands and rubbed them together. "So, where can I start?"

Starfire twisted in the air as she surveyed her house. "Oh. Um… "

"I'll do your books," Tim suggested, pointing to her small book case in the corner.

"Thank you. That would be most helpful. "

"Kitchen?" Dick asked, noting the still open boxes on the floor.

"Yes, please," Starfire said. "I was about to start that next. I have been sorting through what I wanted and what could go to the goodwill but it is an arduous task."

"I remember what it was like moving from Gotham to Bludhaven," he said as he headed into the kitchen. "I was amazed at the amount of stuff I'd managed to collect. Still, moving is a great time to clean out that old junk which just collects dust."

Starfire nodded and opened a few cupboards. "I have sorted through these top ones and removed things I do not want. Anything that is left needs to be packed."

"Leave it to me," Dick said.

"Hey, Star," Cyborg called. "Where do you want done with this?"

Starfire smiled and flittered away.

Between the six of them and their assortment of powers, work went quickly. Dick knew the unpacking would take longer as Starfire would do that mostly on her own, setting her new home up the way she wanted it. He'd stick around and help her out with that, if she wanted.

The cleaning after wasn't as big of a problem either, Starfire was intrinsically neat. He didn't find any dirt rings or dust bunnies hidden away in the corners of her cupboards.

He did, however, find a small box hidden in the back of a cupboard with an odd assortment of knickknacks and items in it. A bottle cap. A twisted paperclip. A chocolate wrapper. A dried rose. Tickets to a movie. A carrousel stamp. A shot glass. A beaded necklace won at a carnival. The Starfire puppet from such a long time ago. A rock. The small stuffed Silkie he'd brought for her as a joke.

One of his Robin masks.

Post-it notes he'd written on, looking worn.

A tattered edged letter, folded and unfolded so many times the paper was flimsy.

A picture of the two of them from Tokyo.

Whimsical items.

Keepsakes of a relationship.

A glass shattered, shards raining down and a feminine gasp.

Dick jerked his head up. "Star?"

She gave him a wild look, her eyes whirling between his and the box. Ignoring the glass on the ground, she held out her hands.

He closed the lid of the box and handed it to her. "I'm sorry, I…"

She cradled the box against her chest.

"You kept all that?"

She didn't meet his eyes.

"I didn't mean to pry."

Letting out a shuddering breath, she spoke, "It is not your fault. I had forgotten it was out here." She looked at the box and placed a hand on the lid. "They are… reminders of lost days."

Dick rose to his feet. "Star—"

"Did I miss the packing?" Donna called from the window as she clambered through. "Darn it. Sorry, I couldn't get away any sooner."

"Better late than never," Raven called. "We still have most of the lifting left."

"Good timing then," Donna said.

Starfire swung her head toward Donna, then back at Dick.

"I'll clean the glass," he offered and went to the box he'd packed the dustpan in. When he turned around, Starfire and her box of keepsakes was across the other side of the room and Dick saw her pack her box carefully inside another one. She looked over, met his eyes and turned away.

Donna pounced on him as he stood up with the dustpan full of shattered glass. "Hi Dick!"

He gave her an awkward, one armed hug, tilting the dustpan away from her so it didn't spill. "Hey Donna, let me get rid of this glass."

"So, _daddy_, are you excited?"

Dick snorted as he tipped the glass shards in the trash. "Terrified, more like."

"You'll be fine," she said. "The kid will have so many aunts breathing down your neck, you won't screw up."

Dick laughed. "Thanks for the vote of confidence."

"How's Babs taking the news?" Donna asked, concerned.

Dick sighed and stowed away the dustpan. "As well as to be expected, I guess," he said. "She doesn't want any part of it."

Donna cringed. "Oooh, sorry."

He pressed his lips together and then made a popping sound with them. "Not much I can do."

"It's such a unique situation."

"It is. Now, make yourself useful. We need to finish packing before Herald gets here."

"Nah, I just came to watch," Donna said and sat on the bench. "All these manly men carrying stuff."

Beast Boy, having come into the kitchen to tape the top of one of Dick's boxes, laughed. "We all knew that was your plan."

"Make sure you do a wiggle as you pick the box up," Donna said, twirling her finger at him.

Raven popped up from the other side of the bench. "I'd like to see that."

Beast Boy, never one to be shy, blew her a kiss and complied.

"Oh gross," Dick complained.

"I'm done, Star," Tim announced. "Anything else?"

"I think we are mostly ready for Herald," Starfire said.

Raven nodded. "I'll summon him," she said and floated a short distance away so she could meditate.

"Break time while we wait?" Cyborg suggested. "I got a bunch of soda's on ice."

"Where?" Beast Boy asked. "I'm so thirsty."

Within the next hour, all of Starfire belongings were carefully transferred through Herald's portal and through to her new apartment in Bludhaven and stowed in her spare room so she could unpack and set up at her leisure. Tim and Dick, leaving the heavy lifting to those who had superpowers, headed off to the local pizza joint and ordered half a dozen pizzas.

By the time they got back, pizza in tow, the gang were sitting on the floor in Starfire's new living room and going over paint swatches with Starfire.

"You painting?" Dick asked, dumping the pizzas in the middle of the group.

There was a general scramble for the food from the hungry boys. Beast Boy and Cyborg swapped pizza without a word and Raven floated her piece to her. Donna busily opened all the remaining boxes so she could see what types had been brought.

Starfire nodded. "I have to repaint my old one white before I am officially moved out, so I thought I would brighten this one up at the same time."

"I liked the purple of your old one," Dick said. "It was very you."

Starfire reached for one of the piles and flicked through, finding the same deep purple she had on the wall in her old place and showed Dick with a smile. "It is already shortlisted." She studied it. "I do not know, perhaps a change is in order."

He grinned, sitting down on the floor opposite Starfire and beside Donna.

"We thought," Donna reached over and selected another colour, a paler purple this time. "Baby's room."

Dick's eyebrows shot up. "You're planning already?"

"Just planning," Starfire said. "There are still many months to accomplish it."

"Plus, we have to do your place," Donna said. "That'll—"

"Donna!" Starfire scolded.

"What?" Donna asked, innocent.

"My place?" Dick blurted, surprised.

Beast Boy, Cyborg and Tim paused their ravenous chewing of pizza to look between them.

"Baby will need some continuity and—" Donna paused and looked at Starfire. "You haven't asked him."

Starfire gave Donna a comically annoyed look. "Thank you and no, I had not."

"Sorry."

"You want to paint _my_ place?" Dick repeated.

Starfire flushed. "It was Donna's idea."

"She'll need a place to stay when she is with you," Donna said. "Her own room."

"Yeah, but— I didn't…" He couldn't think where they were planning on painting. "I don't have room."

"You have that gym," Cyborg said. "Do you really use it?"

"Of course I do—"

"Sacrifices," Raven pointed out.

He felt railroaded. "I… I… think about it."

"I am sorry," Starfire said, reaching for a slice of pizza. "I did not mean to put you on the spot."

"It's fine," Dick said, biting into his own. "I probably should have thought about that myself."

Beast Boy cleared his throat, calling for attention. "So. Um. Rae and me have—"

"Rae and I," Raven corrected, demurely eating her pizza slice.

"Rae and I," Beast Boy repeated, "have an announcement. We weren't gonna do it yet, but we kind of figured, since we're all here, that it might be really nice to tell you all as a group—"

"We're getting married," Raven said, interrupting Beast Boy.

"Babe!" Beast Boy blurted, outraged. "I was getting there!"

"You were taking too long,"

"But—"

Starfire squealed and launched herself across at Raven, who'd obviously expected the reaction by the way she braced. Still, the pair crashed to the ground in a tangle of limbs. Donna's grin took up her entire face as she waited for her turn to congratulate Raven.

"Dude, congrats," Tim said.

"That's amazing news," Dick added, grinning. Excitement filled him, with a healthy dollop of happiness and just a dash of envy.

"B," Cyborg said with a stern expression.

Beast Boy sobered. "Cy."

"You treat her right."

"Always."

Cyborg burst into a grin. "Congrats little man!" he said and grabbed Beast Boy to hoist him up in a hug.

The tackle between Starfire and Raven lasted a long time, longer than the hug Cyborg and Beast Boy shared. Dick could see them whispering to each other. When Starfire finally extracted herself from Raven, they both had tears in their eyes. Donna gave her a moment before she hugged Raven.

"What about me?" Beast Boy asked, his ears drooping woefully. "Where's my Starfire hug?"

"Oh, Gar," Starfire cried and launched herself at him too, floating in the air above his lap as she curled around him.

Dick crawled across the floor to give Raven a hug. "Congrats," he murmured. "You picked a good man."

He could practically feel her smile against his shoulder. "One of the best."

Dick stole Starfire's seat beside Raven since Starfire seemed quite content to snuggle in between Cyborg and Beast Boy.

"So, when's the wedding?" Tim asked.

"In six months," Raven replied.

"We thought we'd get married on our anniversary so I don't have to remember another date," Beast Boy said.

Dick snorted with muted laughter, Cyborg didn't bother to hide his.

"It won't be big," Raven said. "Just family."

"I didn't really care as long as I walk away a husband," Beast Boy said. "It's enough time to round up the Doom Patrol and Arella to come from Azarath."

"It's very exciting," Dick said.

"Can I do photos?" Donna asked and grabbed Raven's hand. "Please?"

"We'd love you to," Raven said. "I was going to hire you anyway."

"No charge!" Donna responded.

"Best man?" Cyborg asked Beast Boy. "C'mon, man. Hook me up."

"'Course it'd be you, dude," Beast Boy said, grinning and the two of them high-fived.

Raven placed her hand on Dick's wrist. "I was hoping you'd give me away."

Dick grinned, his heart lifting. "I'd be honoured."

Raven smiled. "And Starfire's bridesmaid, of course. If you're up for it."

She nodded, gleeful. "I would not miss it."

"Are you sure?" Raven asked. "I mean, you are starting the process soon, aren't you? I don't want to impose."

"I will stand beside you, no matter what," Starfire insisted, then flicked her eyes to Dick. "We may have to locate a dress with an expandable waist."

He grinned back at her.

"Wedding and a baby," Cyborg said, proud. "No more Teens, just Titans. Did you guys ever think we'd be this grown up?"

Dick laughed. "I knew I would be," he said with a teasing grin. "Not sure about you."

Cyborg waggled a stern finger at him. "I can still kick your ass."

"You can try."

Cyborg laughed.

The small party broke up soon after all the pizza disappeared. Tim had to go back to Gotham to start the nightly patrol. Cyborg, Raven, Beast Boy and Donna were wrapped up in Raven's powers and taken back to Jump.

Starfire stretched as the raven dissipated. "Oh, I could just go to bed and sleep."

"Is your bed even set up?"

"That would not take long," she mentioned.

"First night in Bludhaven," he said.

"It feels strange," Starfire noted.

"You'll get used to it. Can I help you with anything?"

"No," she replied, considering the mostly empty space around them. "No, I think… oh, Silkie! I should fetch him."

"He can stay with me tonight if you like."

"You would not mind?"

"Nope. Missed the little guy, we'll have a guy's night."

"He snores," she warned.

"I can deal with that." He bent down to gather up all the empty pizza boxes. "I'll put these in the chute on the way down."

"Thank you."

"Well, if you're sure I can't help you, I'll leave you to it then. I need to run a patrol."

She blinked rapidly and turned toward him. "Oh, do you wish me to aid you while—"

"No. Better not."

"Oh."

"Nothing to do with your capabilities," he said. "Just, if you're shown to be acting in Blud and then you stop, people will question."

"Yes. You are correct."

He gathered up his coat and gear and, holding the boxes in one hand, headed to the door. "Night, Star."

"Dick?"

"Yeah?"

"Would you like to start the process?" she asked.

He nearly dropped the boxes. "What? _Now_?"

She blinked and then waved both hands at him. "Oh, no. Not now. I need to assemble this place first. I should have asked when, my apologies."

He tried to quieten the pounding of his heart. "Right. Of course. Um… well. I suppose. Soon?"

"Soon."

"After you're settled here. I don't know… couple of weeks, maybe? It's really… odd being able to choose, you know?"

Starfire shook her head. "No. I do not."

"Oh. Right." He laughed. "Sorry." He studied her. "You're eager to start."

"I… yes. I am." She placed her hand on her stomach. "I have carried her safe for so long. I want to know her." She watched him. "If you are not ready, we may wait."

He shifted his weight from foot to foot. "Two weeks," he said finally. "That'll give you time to get this place to the way you want it."

She smiled and gave him a nod. "Thank you."

He lingered awkwardly, then turned. "Well then."

"Good night, Dick."

**Messages, an extract.**

_"Hey, just me. Checking in. Have you blacklisted my number or something because I can't seem to get a hold of you lately, just your machine. Anyway… Star's in Bludhaven now, she's living half a block down from me. We're… gonna start soon, so if you want to reconsider, now would be the time. Oh, hey! Good news. Beast Boy and Raven are getting married! Raven even asked me to walk her down the aisle. I thought maybe you'd like to come—" beep. _

"_To tell you the truth, I'm scared shitless. This is a really unique situation. Knowing… I mean, she's pregnant, but it's not started and we get to __**choose**__ when to start… I don't think any humans ever experienced this sort of choice before. I feel like… I dunno… but I really wish you'd talk to me."_

_"You know what I think is really frustrating. Most guys get to have sex before the girl gets pregnant. The last time I had sex with Starfire was years ago, do you think if I asked her she'd give me sympathy—"_

Fumbling, then an angry voice, "Really, Dick?"

"You _are_ there. Hi."

"That wasn't nice."

"Well, you weren't answering the phone. Desperate measures."

"There's a reason for that. Now, why are you using my machine like a diary service?"

"Because I want to talk to you and it seemed like it was the only way."

Babs sighed. "Dick… I really don't want to be that girl."

"What girl?"

"The one who makes you choose between Starfire and me and your baby. It's bitchy and callous and none of us deserve it. So I made the choice myself. I can't do this, it's hard enough. Just leave me alone."

_-click-_


	17. Market

**_Author's Note: _**_The first of several mini-chapters. I'm conden__sing to keep filler at a minimum._

* * *

**Market Day**

The first Sunday after Starfire moved into her apartment, Dick decided he should show her around their neighbourhood. There were local fresh food markets nearby he knew she'd love, as well as a variety of other things to see.

It wasn't a date. It wasn't. Just two friends out on the town, touring the sights. That's it.

Prep talk done, he knocked on her door.

"It is open!" Starfire called. "I am nearly ready!"

He opened the door, catching the leaping worm, and walked into her transformed home. Painted walls, things had found their places. Her balcony had been converted into a miniature greenhouse for her alien plants. Pictures on the wall, square white carpets on the floor, sofas facing the television. It had gone from a bare wooden floor to an intricately decorated home she was comfortable with. Her eyestalk plant sat on the kitchen bench, watching him as he walked in.

Scratching Silkie's back, Dick looked around. "Wow. This looks great. I love what you've done."

"I am pleased with it," she said from her bedroom. She appeared in her doorway, floating as she slipped her shoes on her feet. "So, where are we going? You were most enigmatic in your phone call."

"Farmers markets," Dick said. "I always go on a Sunday, the fresh fruit and veg is just great."

"I had thought you lived on cereal."

"Chopped strawberries and bananas on cereal is the _best_."

Starfire giggled.

"I thought we'd walk around the local area, so you could see where everything was."

"Oh, yes that would be helpful. I have been for the walk and discovered the grocery store and the pizza place and the local Starbucks, but there are still many places I have not yet seen." Picking up her bag, she grabbed her keys. "I am ready." She frowned at him. "Is it cold outside?"

He chuckled, knowing she was curious why he wore gloves. "No. I'm just covering my bases in case of accidental contact."

She frowned. "You never accidently touch."

"It's just a precaution," Dick said. "The markets get pretty busy and… well…" he shrugged. "I think I'd rather you didn't start glowing in public 'cause I handed you an apple or something like that."

Starfire hesitated. "Do you have the ulterior motive for today? This is not a press date, is it?"

"No. I promise. I was trying to be careful."

She narrowed her eyes at him, then decided he was telling the truth. "Okay."

"You'll need a basket or carry bag or something."

Starfire turned her head. "Okay," she said, heading for her pantry. She pulled a carry basket from the bottom.

Silkie wiggled and warbled happily, thinking they were going for a walk

"No, beloved," Starfire murmured, taking the worm from Dick and carted him to his basket. "Stay."

If Silkie had ears, they would have drooped, the poor worm looked so forlorn about missing out.

"We'll bring you back something tasty," Dick said. "Shall we?"

They talked while they walked side by side. About Dick's job, his workmates and friends he'd made in Bludhaven. About Starfire's and whether or not she was finding work here. About Bludhaven and the many sights in the region. She mentioned she'd probably need to purchase a car to use while pregnant, since her job would require travel all over Bludhaven and Gotham and Dick suggested she just borrow his. His car was currently gathering dust at the Manor, but it wouldn't be very hard just to go up and grab it.

He pointed out a lot of the little nooks and crannies of their neighbourhood. A good coffee shop. The local bakery. Hairdressers, not that Starfire used them. Places he thought she might be interested in. He was sure she would discover them on her own, but it was nice to take her.

The farmers market was three blocks away from their street, situated on the open warehouse at the bottom of a set of apartments. Tables filled to the brim with produce, people hustle and bustling between the stalls. Fruits and fish, vegies and bags of spices, dried food, cold food, various yoghurts and butters and other milk products, flours and flowers, this place had everything.

Starfire twirled at the entrance, with a happy exclamation of 'glorious' she was off.

There was some staring, of course, but both Dick and Starfire were used to that. The newspapers had already reported Starfire had come to Bludhaven and had been filled with speculation that she was joining Nightwing's fight against crime, which had prompted speculation about their relationship, but Starfire had issued a statement saying she was in Bludhaven for her career and her presence was only incidental.

Still, Dick had lied, just a little, when he said this wasn't a press date. He knew Starfire was being watched by one paparazzi at least, he'd spotted the man a couple of times on the street. So some photos would be leaked, establishing a relationship between Dick and Starfire beyond what occurred at Fashion week.

If she knew, she wouldn't be acting as carefree and happy as she was, picking through the fruits, talking to the venders and asking questions. She wouldn't be grabbing his arm in excitement and dragging him from stall to stall to share her discovery.

It was just like when they were younger. When they were _happy_.

**Anger.**

He slammed the door open and walked into her home uninvited. "What the hell did you do?"

Starfire, covered in lilac coloured paint droplets and wearing paint covered overalls, poked her head out from her bedroom. "What is wrong?"

"It's all over the precinct!" he spat. Anger was like a haze around him, spinning through the air. After hearing the news, he'd found a reason to get out of work early and come straight here for an explanation, coming in uniform instead of changing first. The more he heard about it, the angry he'd become. How could she risk herself like this? How _dare_ she risk their child?

Starfire ducked back into her room to put the roller down and then came out. "What is—"

"You got in the middle of a fire fight," he snapped. "_Directly_ in the line of fire. The SWAT team was there! They're saying they couldn't have done it without you. You should not have intervened—"

"And you are angry over that?" she asked, her brow creasing. "There was a child! I could not—"

"You could've been hurt! Everyone is talking about how you single-handedly saved the day!"

"That is always a risk."

"An _unnecessary_ risk."

"I am a Titan!"

"A Titan who has been pulled from active duty!"

She scowled at him. "And you never ignore protocol to protect a life."

"You _are_ protecting a life. You can't just—"

Understanding dawned on her face. "Stop."

He shook his finger at her. "You need to listen to me—"

"Stop, Dick. Now." To illustrate her point, she thrust her hand at his chest and stopped without coming in contact with him.

He snapped his mouth shut and glared angrily.

"I understand," she said, softening her tone. "But I have been doing my job and saving lives _and_ keeping her safe for years. I, at this present time, know my own strength and weakness. If _teslait'n_ had ended, if I were powerless, you would be within your rights to ream me for being reckless, but right now, no."

"You can't do this anymore—"

"I _can_. I have been doing it for years. Besides," she smiled. "You yourself have saved the day by reputation alone."

"I—" Confusion coursed through him. "What?"

"Dick, I was there, yes. But I did not do anything, simply made my presence known by pulling that boy out of the way. I was seen. Those responsible _surrendered_. You cannot tell me that has not happened to you before."

"I… well…" All the angry wind blew from his sails. "Really?"

She nodded. "Really." The hand hovering over his chest retracted. "I appreciate the concern, even if it is unfounded."

"I… ahh… I'll just slink out of here with my tail between my legs, then."

She poked him in the chest with a finger. "Jackass," she said, still smiling.

He snorted. "Did you… you just called me a jackass."

"You always overreact," she said. "It is your failing."

He rubbed the back of his neck. "Sorry. I'm just… I'm so…" he sighed and gave her the truth. "Scared. I heard the news and I was petrified you'd get hurt or the baby… and…"

She turned sympathetic. "I forget that I have had so long to become used to this and it is still so new to you." She inclined her head. "I apologise for worrying you."

"You won't… you won't risk yourself like that when we start, will you?"

Starfire sighed and walked into her living room where she sat on the couch. "I cannot promise you I will not."

He jolted and followed her. "Star—"

"I can promise I will not purposely put myself in harm's way. I would not run into a burning building or throw myself at the mercy of a bullet… but… to save the life of a child? Yes. I would risk. That is who I am. That is who you are."

"You _can't_—"

"Do you think it would be fair for me to ask you not to throw yourself into danger while I was pregnant because I could not bear the risk of our daughter losing her father?"

"I… ah… shit." He flopped down on the couch beside her. "Point taken."

"It is hard," she said. "Because a hero is not all we are anymore. We have commitments." She gestured his police uniform. "Jobs. Responsibilities. Family. There is a lot more to risk and we must weigh the consequences."

"Yeah. Well… you used to like me as a hero."

Starfire pressed her lips together. "Things change."

Not the answer he'd been hoping for. But then, he didn't know the answer he was looking for, only that that one was wrong.

"Speaking of change," she said and picked up the newspaper which had been lying on the coffee table. "You would not believe the photo I saw in the social pages."

Dick cringed.

**Messages, an extract**

_"Okay, so, there's a picture in the Bludhaven Bugle that's got me and Star looking… I dunno. Flirty? Cosy? Anyway, I just wanted to let you know it was staged. There'll probably be a couple coming out like that. It doesn't mean anything, we're just trying to avoid the massive press outrage when the news breaks. I just wanted you to know. Call me, Babs. Even if you just want to yell. I miss talking to you."_

**Teslait'n**

Dick had been both dreading and waiting for this the entire week. He'd barely been able to sleep last night. He'd run a late patrol in the hope the activity would help him sleep, but it hadn't worked.

Sunday morning and he greeted the sunrise by pacing around his living room, waiting for the clock to count down to a time where it would not be too early to rock up at Starfire's.

He made it half an hour past sunrise, which was still too early by anyone's standards.

Starfire, dressed in a tank top, a small pair of shorts and hanging open robe, answered the door. "Dick?" She yawned and covered her mouth and he felt bad.

"Um…"

"Is it time?" she asked, looking sleepy. "Did I sleep in?"

"No. I… um… I'll come back."

She woke up a little more. "Anxious?"

"Yeah. A bit."

She stepped away from the door. "Come in. Have you eaten?"

He followed her in, shutting the door behind him. "Kinda… feeling too sick to."

She studied him for a moment. "Dick, I do hope you have not worked yourself up too much regarding this. You may be disappointed."

"I think— I just want it over, Star. It feels like it's been hanging over my head."

She nodded. "Okay," she said and walked into her bedroom. "Come."

"What? _Now_?"

"I do not see any reason we should wait," she called.

He lingered in her doorway, watching the purple robe fall to the ground. Her bedroom suddenly got very interesting as she crawled back into her bed.

"I like how this turned out," Dick said. "Purple themed. Nice."

"No shoes on the bed please," Starfire sang as she flopped down. Rolling onto her back, she pulled up her shirt and wriggled down the belt of the pants so her belly was exposed more.

Yes. The room was very interesting. Curtains. Those were nice curtains.

Silkie looked up from his tight balled position on Starfire's bed, blinking blearily at him.

He dug his toe into the heel of his shoe to remove it, then the other shoe. As an afterthought, he removed his jacket. Then just stood there awkwardly.

She patted the bed beside her in invitation. "It is relatively simple once we begin. I do not foresee it taking very long, given my reactions to you previously. Then we may enjoy breakfast."

Swallowing, he crawled into bed beside her, lying an acceptable distance away. He clasped his hands together and stared at the roof.

"Are you okay?" she asked. "Do you not wish to do this?"

"This is… this feels so clinical," Dick mumbled.

"May I ask what you expected? Candlelight? Romance?"

"I don't know. But I kind of feel like a donor. It's… impersonal."

She turned her head away. "I am sorry you feel that way."

Realising he probably just insulted her culture, he rolled onto his side and propped his head up on his hand. "Sorry. I didn't mean it like that."

"I imagine this would have a very different feel if we were together," she murmured. "But you wish to be with Babs. I am trying—"

"To make it easier on us both. I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said anything."

She nodded, met his eyes briefly, then watched Silkie as though he was the most interesting thing in the room.

"What do I do?" Dick asked.

She lifted her hands and hovered them over her stomach. "Give me your hand."

Dick moved his hand until it was near hers, then hesitated. "Is it okay to—"

Starfire moved both her hands until they covered his and then placed it against her belly—a little lower than he would have preferred— covering it with her hands. The golden glow of her skin was instantaneous. Flowing warmth, pulsing light, cascading up from his hand and across her skin. "Are you certain?" she asked, meeting his eyes.

He smiled. "I'm certain."

"Repeat after me," she whispered, her eyes glazing with every breath and pulse. "She is mine and I am hers."

"She is mine and I am hers."

"_Du k'ataar nuq my'raat destikatop nor nind ein menasot_."

He blinked, unsure how to pronounce that mouthful.

Starfire smiled. "I promise to always protect her light," she translated.

He breathed a small sigh of relief. "I promise to always protect her light."

Starfire rested one hand to his cheek, her eyes gleaming. She lifted her head, pressed her lips against his, once, twice, then dropped back on the pillow. "_D'omegatro_," she whispered and he wished he spoke more of her language. Her fingers dropped from his cheek, her eyes closing and Dick was left to gape at her.

As a kiss it left a lot to be desired, but it still left the taste of her lips lingering against his mouth.

Unhooking his arm from under his head, he settled down on the pillow to watch her while he waited.

Ripples. That's what Dick likened the glow to. Ripples across the surface of her skin, slow, undulating waves, brightening and fading like the ripples of water on a pond. Starfire remained still, her lashes resting against her cheeks and her expression so peaceful. Her thumb stroked against his hand, he didn't know if that was deliberate or an involuntary movement.

The glow shifted direction, instead of heading outward from his hand, it rippled inward. A heat grew. A slow, gradual burn which seemed to pulse in time with her glow. He knew what it was, how could he not realise, but he was still awestruck.

The glimmering quickened.

The light seemed to warp toward his hand, faster and faster and then…

Nothing. Gone.

Just them, lying together on the bed, with his hand on her stomach.

A rumble and Dick realised Starfire was purring. He'd never heard her purr before. He hadn't known she could.

Her eyes fluttered open and she smiled as she turned her head toward his, gently resting their heads together. "It is done."

He grinned. She looked so content, lying there with his hand on her stomach, all snuggly and wonderful. Almost as though—

She broke the spell by rolling away from him. "Breakfast?" she asked, fetching her robe and continued to speak as she walked out into her living room. "I have various cereals if you would like."

The bed beside him was cold and he mourned the loss. "Um. Yeah. Okay."

**Messages, an extract.**

_"Hey, Al? Um… Could I… I think… I need to… um… no. Ahh, fuck it, never mind I'll— OH! Sorry! Swear jar." –cough– "Um… Tell Bruce I'll come to dinner next month like he asked. What's the fundraiser for anyway?"_

* * *

_**Author's Note:** If you saw, shh, don't spoil it.  
_


	18. First sign

**_Author's Note:_**

_Many of you saw my note on tumblr. For those who didn't, the gist is, A choice made is my last fanfiction. For sure this time. Absolute. Certain events in my life have deemed it necessary to cut something out and fanfiction was it. I will still write. I will still try and get my novels published, I just won't be doing fanfiction. If you're interested in the why, please see tumblr._

* * *

**First sign.**

Nothing changed in the first two weeks. At first, Dick found an excuse to visit Starfire every morning on his way to work, then again on his way home. Just to check if she was showing any symptoms. She always greeted him with a smile and a negative.

Nothing yet. No, she wasn't upset. No, her powers were still intact. No, she didn't need to smell him.

So, he started coming every second day so he didn't crowd her and lived his life between moments. He patrolled, in both jobs. He took down crooks. He followed the law and arrested people for making simple mistakes. He learnt more about the force than he imagined, all those years being Nightwing and he saw the other side of the fence. And how difficult a vigilante could make cop life at times.

Listening around the water cooler, exchanging stories about Nightwing sightings was one of the highlights of every cop's day. He was envied, outside the law yet still acting for the good of it. Dick knew his stuff, he knew exactly how to process evidence as Nightwing so the cops could do their jobs. That was something that Batman had drilled into them. There was no point capturing ordinary criminals if you couldn't keep them behind bars.

Dick went drinking with Wally. He trained with Tim. He met Raven for coffee. He gamed with Cyborg and Beast Boy via the internet. He argued with Bruce. He was chided by Alfred for stalking Babs. Normal things.

He felt somehow it should be different. He should feel different. But he didn't. Everything was perfectly normal, nothing was different. Nothing had changed.

Then he woke up to frantic knocking at three o'clock in the morning. He threw on a shirt as he staggered out of his room to answer the door. Flicking on the hall light, he fell onto the door so he could peer through the peephole.

Starfire stood at the door, her purple robe pulled tightly around her, Silkie practically being strangled, her grip so tight. There was a wild look in her eyes as she looked from left to right rapidly, then raised her hand to knock while looking around. Like she was expecting attack.

In a panic, he fumbled for the chain and opened the door. "Star?"

She bolted by him and into the room. Checking the hallways beyond his front door, he was surprised to find them empty. Closing the door behind him, he asked, "What's wrong?"

She babbled in Tamaranian, talking so fast he couldn't differentiate words. Silkie squeaked and protested at his treatment.

He crossed the room to place his hands on her upper arms. "Star. English."

"It is gone," she gasped and her eyes flooded with tears. She heaved in a ragged breath. "I have lost it. It is gone and what do I do? I cannot feel, so empty, _mynat et mursfrat dok gok g'nedt k'lari_, _g'far nord mudi eskanoat—"_

He directed her backward so she could sit, then squatted down in front of her. "I can't understand you."

She continued to babble in Tamaranian, clutching Silkie harder.

He pried her fingers from the poor squeezed-purple worm, Silkie scurrying away to hid the moment he was free. "Calm down."

Starfire gasped mid-sentence and clutched her chest and doubled over. "I cannot breathe."

Having dealt with hysterical people plenty of times, Dick ordered, "Head between your knees." He placed his hand on the back of her neck and pushed her forward. She went easily, to his surprise, her hands clutching her ankles as she put her head down.

"Is it the baby?" he asked. "Is something wrong with the baby?"

Starfire squeaked.

Bending further over, he scooped her hair away from her face. "Starfire! The baby?"

She shook her head. "My abilities. They are gone."

He puffed out a breath and tried not to laugh inappropriately.

She grabbed him with one hand and hung on. "This is not a laughing matter," she snarled, and he knew by her expression, her eyes should be glowing. The grip on him should have bruised, and it didn't. No wonder she was in a panic.

"I—"

She dissolved into tears, releasing him to hug her legs and bury her face in her knees.

"It's okay," he soothed, his hand on the back of her shoulder. "You're okay. I'm here."

"Dick," she whimpered and rocked back and forth. "I cannot—" Releasing her legs, she curled her arms around her head. "I thought I was prepared. I thought I _knew_ what this would be like. But I cannot quell the panic and I feel so empty, it is like I am being filled with cold where there was once warmth. "

"Shh, shh," he soothed and tugged at her wrists. Dropping his knees to the ground so he knelt rather than squatted, he managed to coax her arms onto his shoulder. "C'mere."

She lifted her head, her hand gathered up the back of his shirt but she stiffened. "Dick, I—"

"It's okay," he repeated. Even now, when she needed him, she was trying to distance herself and he wasn't having any of that. "Let me hold you."

Her knees hit the ground as she folded into him, burying her face in his neck. As his arms closed around her, he felt her breathe in his scent deeply. He tried to ignore the surge of arrogant pride when she relaxed but it was difficult.

She sat on her ankles, her hands gripping the back of his shirt and she rested against him. He could tell how tightly she gripped his shirt –not him– because of how much the fabric pulled tight across his chest. Dick stroked her back, long, soothing motions.

Her familiar honey scent filled his nose. He hadn't held her, just held her with no prelude to anything, in such a long time. He guessed the last time he had would have been back when they were dating.

For someone as touch dependant as Starfire, that was a long time.

Kneeling on the ground holding her became more difficult as time went on. The awkwardness of the angle, her weight against him. He wasn't braced properly for this. It was also three-thirty in the morning, she was in a mood and there was no way he was going to let her be alone right now. "Star?"

"Hmm?"

"You shouldn't be alone right now," he murmured. "But I need to work in a few hours."

"But—"

"Come and lie in my bed."

She released him and shoved him away with none of her usual strength, so he didn't actually move far, to both of their surprise. He'd expected, by the way she put her whole body into the shove, to be thrown across the room and clear across the next apartment too. She stared at him for a moment, then tried to skitter backward, only to be trapped by the couch. "Dick, no—"

"You lie on my bed, I'll stay on the couch. You'll be safe." He thought there was something uncouth about bragging his bed smelt like him.

"Oh."

He stood up and offered her his hand, waiting until she took it to pull her to her feet. "Let's get you tucked in."

She was gone by morning, before he even woke. She left a small note on his counter, thanking him for assisting her and that was it. He felt… well, he didn't know.

**Messages, an extract.**

_"So… Alfred ripped into me. What'd you tell him? I'm not stalking you! You don't see me all panty outside your window, do you? I'm just calling. Maybe you can let this go easily but I can't." An exasperated sigh. " You know what? Fine. Whatever. You've made your point. I won't call you anymore. I still want to talk to you, though. So please, Babs. Call me?"_

**Avoidance**.

Dick didn't see Starfire again for a few days and even when he did, it was for only a few minutes at most. She was always rushing off to some appointment, some meeting, some job, brushing past him without looking at him for more than a second.

It annoyed him to no end. She had no time for him. He was going out of his way to make sure she was okay and she could barely stand to spend a second in the same room as him.

And, knowing it was juvenile, he decided not to chase her. After all, Babs called being concerned _stalking_. So, if Starfire wanted him, she could come to him. After all, he'd done nothing wrong, nothing to initiate her ire.

So he continued to live his life as if everything was normal.

He always looked at her building as he passed it, whether as Nightwing or himself. Sometimes it was nothing more than a glance, sometimes it was a long, calculating look, sometimes he would even get his binoculars out and watch from the rooftops to see how she looked.

Four weeks passed before he noticed.

He only noticed because, as he ran across the rooftops after a late night patrol, he saw her walking along the street toward her building with a man who was obviously hitting on her.

He paused to watch, lingering in the shadows of the rooftop of the building opposite, hidden by the trees which framed the street. The binoculars came out, as did the little bug which allowed him to snoop on conversations.

He was just seeing if she was okay. He was absolutely not jealous. At all.

"_I really think the new lens does amazing things for you_," the man was saying. "_I'd love to shoot you naked—_"

"_This is me_," Starfire interrupted, picking a building completely at random.

The man paused mid conversation. "_Oh, really_?"

"_Yes_." She stuck out her hand. "_Thank you for walking me home, Henry_."

"_It doesn't have to end_," Henry suggested, stepping closer to her. "_We could share a nightcap_._ See where that takes us."_

"Don't do it," Nightwing whispered.

"_That would be inappropriate as we work together."_

"Good girl."

_"I can do great things for your career."_

Starfire frowned and shifted away from him. _"I do not need assistance regarding that aspect."_

"_You're a very beautiful woman_," Henry said, stepping forward. "_I can make it very easy for you in Bludhaven or very hard_." His hand lifted.

Starfire skittered up the stairs. "_This is inappropriate behaviour."_

"Kick his ass," Nightwing mumbled.

_ "Only way to get ahead in this town."_

_"It is not."_

"_Come, now, a beautiful girl like you must be aware this is how things are done—"_

Her hands curled protectively over her stomach. "_I will be reporting you to my agency in the morning, Henry. I can assure you, you will be blacklisted."_

Henry grabbed her arm. "_They won't believe you. I am—"_

Starfire looked up. Directly at Nightwing. "_Do you know who I am?" _she snarled, her eyes locked on Nightwing. "_I can break you with a finger."_

Nightwing leapt over the side of the building. He bounded off the rail of the balcony below, flipped down to grab the next one, kicked off a tree and landed on the ground. "Starfire!" he commanded and ran toward them.

Henry spun, startled by Nightwing's sudden presence. He backed away several steps.

"I need your help," Nightwing said, holding out his hand for her. "Emergency."

She took his hand and he pulled her closer, a hand around her waist to keep them together. A grappling hook launched and he winched them both aloft. It was so quick and smooth; Henry didn't even have time to react before they were gone.

He deposited them on a rooftop, pulling them away from the edge so Henry couldn't see them. "Asshole," he muttered. "Are you okay?"

Starfire hit him in the arm. "You were spying on me!"

"A good thing too, you needed help! And I wasn't spying," he corrected as an afterthought. "I was on my way home after a patrol."

She gave him a bland look. "How dare you?" she snarled and hit him again. "I am not some damsel who needs protecting, you cannot just do the waltzing back into my life and think you are entitled to help me when I do not need it." Her words were forced, like she felt she had to say them, even if she didn't believe them. It was an odd thing to hear.

He went to step away and realised Starfire, even in her anger, gripped him tightly.

He stopped analysing her voice and looked at her body language. Eyes wide, tight grip, her body shifting closer to his. There was a tremble in her words. Her nostrils flared every time she breathed in deeply. She'd been _afraid_.

"_Are_ you okay?" he asked with more tenderness this time, placing his hands over the top of hers.

"I am fine," she snapped.

"Star, look at yourself. Look at what you're doing."

She dropped her eyes to her hands, to the position of their bodies. She was right up against him, her hands fisted around the front of his suit. She looked away, embarrassed. "Oh." Her fingers flexed as though she intended to release him, and couldn't.

"What's wrong?"

"I do not…" She shook her head.

Leaving his hands over hers, he stroked her with his thumbs. "Talk to me."

"I do not like feeling like this."

"Like what?"

"I have not seen you in a month," she said. "I should be angry. I should be furious, you promised to protect me and you were not there. And yet, all I can feel is that I am so _glad_ you are here now. It is most disconcerting."

He was bewildered. "I thought you didn't want me around."

A small flare of anger. "Did I not tell you I would need you around?"

"You kept running away," he said. "Every time I came around, you'd find an excuse to leave."

She ducked her head. "I was embarrassed."

"By what?" He released one hand and used it to lift her face up. "Your reaction to losing your powers? Starfire, c'mon. That was a perfectly reasonable reaction. Your powers are part of you, a huge part and they were suddenly gone. You were right to feel the way you did. I didn't mind then and I don't mind now."

"I _do_," she insisted. "It is weakness. I do not like weakness! _X'hal_, why the females of my species were cursed in this way, I do not know."

"There had to be a price to being able to choose when you had the baby."

She gave him a disgruntled look. "I suppose."

He released her chin and returned his hand to hers. "I guess this would be very different if I was a Tamaranian male and all the instinctual territorial issues that came with it."

"I guess."

"I'm sorry I can't be that man for you."

"I do not want you to be that man, Dick," she replied. "I prefer you as you are." Her head dropped even more and she leant forward until she could rest her forehead on his shoulder.

He rubbed his hands along her wrists; she still gripped the front of his shirt. "Personally, I think it's because your females are all so strong," he said. "When you are pregnant, you want to pass on as much strength to your offspring as possible, so you save nothing for yourselves. Plus, it gives your males something useful to do."

She let out a tiny, half-hearted giggle. "Perhaps."

"Who was that guy?" he asked.

She lifted her head. "Henry Fitzpatrick. He is a photographer. I had a shoot not too far away and he offered to walk me home. I should have known when he did not take no for the answer."

"Do you want to press charges? I'll happily arrest him in the morning."

She smiled. "No. But thank you. I shall deal with it."

"You were shooting this late?"

She nodded. "I have been shooting all day."

"You must be exhausted."

She nodded again.

"Have you eaten?"

"Umm… at lunch."

He frowned. "That's… nearly twelve hours ago." He shook his head. "I'll see you home, then I'm ordering you a pizza."

"Dick—"

He kissed her, a quick peck like she'd given him before. She blinked rapidly at him, confused. "I want your schedule," he said, prying her hands away from his chest and keeping one to hold. "I'll pick you up at the end of the day."

She narrowed her eyes. "Now you are fussing."

He grinned. "Yup. Be prepared, Star, Alfred taught me _all_ about fussing."

Her smile was part exasperation, part humourous. "_X'hal_."

* * *

**_Author's Note:_**

_About modelling and the cliché of the photographer being an ass and hitting on the models. It does happen, quite often, especially for underage models or models who are very new to the industry. Most of those who don't have an agent, for example, may be taken in by that. Often there could be forms of coercion for removing articles of clothing or standing provocatively when the model hasn't been prepped that would happen.  
_

_Likewise, the reverse can be true. Models who hit on the photographer to get ahead._

_There are a lot of help websites which offer tips to people wanting to model/photograph, the dos and don't. Most models/photographers are lovely people who take their work very professionally, but there's always one or two which make people uncomfortable. It's up to you to keep yourself safe._


	19. Dinner

**_Author's Note:_** _We're really not doing angst or hurt right now are we? I shall have to change that._

_Guest: They're roughly 25 here. Friends with benefits occured when they were between 20-22ish.  
_

_Joshua: I'll still review reply (assuming how many there are) as much as I'm able. I just won't be writing stories anymore. _

* * *

**Dinner.**

Starfire smoothed down her skirt, picking at lint.

"You look fine," Dick said, shifting gear and checking his mirrors as they pulled off and into the Manor's long driveway. There were several cars ahead of him, Bruce had arranged a private dinner for the more influential of his clients to discuss his latest charity and had requested their attendance. "It's just dinner." Just dinner, he internally scoffed. A dinner which required Starfire to break out her evening dresses and Dick to strangle himself in a tie.

"It is… the first time I have seen him since…"

"Ahh." They drove toward the manor slowly in line behind the other cars as they waited for the hired valet. "Well—"

"Do you think Alfred will be angry?"

Dick snorted, he'd thought she'd been talking about Bruce. "Alfred? No way. He loves you."

"I never told him."

"You never told me either and I'm not angry."

Starfire gave him a look.

"Well… not anymore. You'll be fine," Dick continued with a smile. "It's just a fundraiser, we've done plenty of those. We just have to play our parts." The media had gotten wind of their 'dating' and he and Starfire had allowed themselves to be photographed going out to dinner or the movies and acting like a couple, minus the kissing.

"For how much longer?" Starfire asked.

"Until you're showing, I guess. Then we can… I don't know. Do a press release if it comes to that."

"Fake break up."

"Remain friends for the baby," he corrected. "We just need one of these at least so Bruce is seen meeting you, that's all."

"Will Babs be here tonight?" Starfire asked.

The smile dropped off Dick's face. "No."

"I am sorry."

"It'd be hard to fake-flirt with you if she was here."

"Still, I am sorry she has ceased contact with you."

His eyes flashed to her. "How'd you know that?" he asked, startled.

"She is my friend," Starfire said simply.

"She's mine too, why is she talking to you and not me?" he complained, his voice rising.

"She is hurt—"

"So am I."

"Dick—" she was interrupted by her door opening, the valet bowing to her as he held the door open.

Dick sighed and got out of his car and headed around to offer Starfire his elbow to escort her. "Sorry, I didn't mean to yell."

"I know," she murmured, both hands on his arm.

"Just remember," he said as he led her up the stairs which went into the Manor. "This is the first time you've officially met them."

"I know," she replied and plastered a bright smile on her face.

Bruce waited in the foyer, greeting his guests. There were a few important people here, mostly brokers and other CEOs, so he played the valiant host. Tim stood offset in the role of the dutiful adopted son in training for taking over the family business, since Dick had no intention.

"Dick," Bruce said and they shook hands.

"Hi, Dad," Dick said, winking at Tim, who had trouble keeping a straight face. Dick tugged Starfire forward and placed his hand on her back. "This is Starfire."

Bruce took her hand and bowed slightly at the waist. "Charmed."

"Likewise, Mr Wayne," Starfire said. "Thank you for inviting me."

"Please, call me Bruce," he said with his usual winning smile and flirt reserved for pretty girls.

Tim coughed to hide his laugh.

Bruce's lips twitched up and he rolled his eyes toward Dick in an 'off with you' gesture.

"And this is my little brother, Tim," Dick said, moving Starfire away from Bruce.

"Hi," Tim said, grinning broadly. "Nice to meet you."

"Greetings," she said and because it was 'expected', she continued, "I did not know you had a brother."

"Long story," Dick said.

"We adopted Dick," Tim teased.

Dick snorted. "I was first, _little_ brother."

"May I show you where to stow your coat, ma'am?" Alfred asked, appearing beside her.

"Please," Starfire responded immediately and followed him like a lost puppy.

"She's not wearing a coat," Tim whispered.

"Shh, let them have this moment," Dick replied and followed at a respectable distance.

It wasn't much of an exchange, they couldn't afford one with all the people who might be watching. Because Dick was watching, he saw the moment Alfred hid him and Starfire by opening a door to stow her imaginary coat. And because of the position he was in, he saw Alfred's brief brush of Starfire's cheek and how much she relaxed because of it.

Dick grinned. Alfred was an old softie.

**Second sign.**

Starfire dazzled. Dick was pretty sure half the guys around the long table were half in love with her, or at least in lust. Possibly even some of the ladies. She smiled and was courteous. She knew enough about Bruce's work to be interesting and engage in conversation. She knew more than enough about Earth now that she didn't fumble over her words or had to be explained what slang words meant.

Dick watched her in awe. It was a side of her he'd not been aware of. He kicked himself for that, she'd been living her life and looking out for herself on her own since she was eighteen now.

She didn't need him.

And if that thought didn't _burn_ him. His sweet, innocent, naïve Star who looked at the world through gilded glasses was gone and in her place was this knowledgeable, confident, still sweet but not so innocent woman.

He'd missed her transformation.

Alfred slipped the Dick's mostly full plate out from in front of him. Dick was all set to protest, since he'd not yet finished when Alfred whispered, "You would do well to contain the puppy eyes, Master Richard."

Dick nearly bit his tongue, he closed his mouth so fast.

Alfred turned to Starfire. "May I take your plate for the new course, ma'am?"

She rested her cutlery on the plate. "I thank you."

Alfred deftly removed her plate and supplied her with a new knife and fork.

"What is the next course?" she asked, curious.

"Lamb," Alfred replied.

Starfire smiled. "Did you make it?"

"In this case, no," Alfred replied, rearranging her napkin and filling up her water glass so he could linger.

"A shame."

His eyes twinkled. "Indeed."

Dick rested his hand on Starfire's wrist, leaning toward her as the various waiters cleared the table ready for the next meal. "You're doing great."

She leant toward him. "I thank you." Her brow furrowed. "Are you okay? You have been most quiet."

"Normally am at these types of things," he replied. "I get to play brooding son."

"Oh," she said. "Should I—"

He stroked her hand with his, tucking his fingers inside hers to hold. "Just keep doing what you're doing," he said and lifted her hand to his lips to kiss the back of it.

Starfire's eyebrows shot up and she took her bottom lip between her teeth.

They were playing a part. Just a part. Characters dancing on Bruce's stage.

Funny how easy it was to forget that.

He tore his gaze away and rested her hand back on the table. As he went to release it, her fingers tightened around his. His eyes found hers again and he smiled.

Starfire jolted as a plate was placed before her and Dick moved back on his chair so the waiter could place his next course in front of him. Starfire's grip tightened, then released to grab her napkin and press it to her lips. "Excuse me," she murmured, standing up from the table so fast she almost knocked her chair over.

Dick wondered why she'd gone a little yellow as she hurried out of the room. He caught Alfred's eye and the butler hastened to follow. Bruce, up the other end of the table, sent him a questioning glance without breaking his conversation with the man sitting beside him.

"Oh, this smells so great," the man opposite Dick said, "I love coming here, Bruce, you always put on the most amazing spreads, even if you do take our money afterward."

Bruce laughed, as did a lot of people around the table.

Dick stiffened. _Smell_. "Excuse me," Dick said, standing. He shot Bruce a wild glance and then strode from the room.

The guest bathroom was down the hallway from the dining room, but Dick knew there was a hidden alcove closer. Bruce often used to disappear and it had access to a toilet and shower. And he knew Starfire knew its location.

She was there, as was Alfred who tenderly held back her hair as she emptied her stomachs of her dinner. Carefully taking Alfred's place in a way which disturbed Starfire the least, Dick squatted on the floor beside her.

"Can I get you anything?" Alfred asked.

"Water," Dick replied. "And tabasco sauce."

Alfred raised an eyebrow.

"It does for her what ginger does for us."

"Of course. I shall be back momentarily."

Starfire glanced at him with an exhausted, nauseated and half irritated look. She dry heaved and spat into the bowl. "You do not have to be here," she murmured, her voice rough. She reached up to flush and then rested her arm along the seat and her head on her arm to stare gloomily into the bowl.

"We're doing this together," Dick said and brushed her hair back over her shoulder.

She groaned. "Then you can evacuate the contents of nine stomachs next time."

He chuckled, moving so he could sit on the ground where she could see him, the bowl of the toilet between them.

"Ugg, this is most unattractive," she murmured.

"It's just one of those things we have to deal with," Dick replied, still brushing his fingers against the exposed skin of her shoulder under the pretence of smoothing down her hair. "And you look beautiful."

Her smile was tiny, but there. Then the yellowness returned to her face and she bent over the bowl again.

"Has this been happening a lot?" he asked when she was finished and the toilet flushed.

She panted lightly. "To a degree. This is what you humans call the morning sickness, yes?"

He toyed with her hair. "Yeah."

"Hmm… why is it called the 'morning sickness' when it has the capability to strike at any time during the day?"

He laughed softly. "I honestly don't know. What do Tamaranians call it?"

"Death," she whimpered.

He rested his hand on the back of her head. "It'll pass."

"That does not make me feel better at this present moment."

"I know."

A soft knock at the door and Dick turned his head. "Yes?"

Alfred came in holding a small tray with a glass of water and a small bottle of tabasco sauce. "Is everything okay?"

Starfire nodded. "I think there is no more." She gathered her skirt and Dick bounded to his feet her help her stagger to hers.

"I should take you home," he said.

"No," she said and washed her mouth at the sink. "It will pass."

"You need to rest," he insisted.

"Dick, I am fine," she said, taking the glass of water and the sauce Alfred offered.

"What if there's another smell you can't handle?" he asked, watching her take a mouthful of both.

"We cannot abandon dinner," she replied. "We were invited."

"But—"

"I am not weak," she snapped.

"I didn't say—"

"With all due respect," Alfred interjected. "I have taken the liberty of opening up Master Richard's old bedroom. I would recommend a short kip."

Starfire gave Alfred a wild look. "But—"

"I have several cheesecakes stored away which will be available for eating after the dinner is complete, but only if you rest."

Dick knew better than to smile.

Alfred turned to Dick. "And what are you still doing here, young sir? You have a dinner to attend, if I'm not mistaken."

"That's my cue," Dick said. He slipped his hand across Starfire's hip as he leant into her and kissed the corner of her lips, then left her to splutter with Alfred.

When he got back to the dining room, he headed up the table to squat down by Bruce, ignoring the knowing smirks he got from a few men at the table.

"Everything okay?" Bruce asked quietly, cutting into his lamb. "Because you realise what that looked like."

"Yeah, I know." Dick rolled his eyes, dirty minds, all of them. "Star's taken ill."

Bruce rested his elbow on the table, his hand and fork curled so it hid his mouth better. "The expected type of ill?"

"Yeah. Alfred's making her lie down. She's not happy."

Bruce smirked.

Dick stood to return to his seat, but couldn't resist a jab, "Apparently he has hidden cheesecakes."

Bruce raised an eyebrow. "Oh? We'll see about that."

**Cheesecake**.

"Another slice?" Alfred offered.

Starfire kicked off her shoes, sitting on the stool in Alfred's private kitchen at the end of the night. All Bruce's guests were gone and they were free to be themselves. She'd recovered from her bout of illness, Alfred feeding her some chicken soup before she was allowed to eat cheesecake. "Oh, please," she said, holding up her plate to Alfred. "It is delicious."

"Keep 'em coming," Bruce said, holding out his own plate.

"Do you not think you have had enough, sir?" Alfred asked. "I believed you mentioned your suit was rather tight around the hips."

Dick almost choked on his hot chocolate and Tim burst out laughing.

"Are you calling me pudgy?" Bruce asked, staring at Alfred.

"I said no such thing," Alfred replied, sliding another slice of cheesecake onto Bruce's place.

"You're just implying it."

"It is not my fault if you jump to that conclusion," Alfred said, filled with the air of dignity. "I am simply repeating what you told me."

Starfire giggled. "_Is_ your suit tight, Bruce?"

Bruce waggled his spoon at her. "Don't you start, young lady, I get enough from the boys, not you too."

She swallowed the giggles, but couldn't hide the mirth on her face.

Tim nudged Dick, waggling his eyebrows up and down.

"God forbid your child ends up like him," Bruce continued and cut into the cheesecake with his spoon. "The world is not prepared."

Starfire smiled and caught Dick's eye. "Oh, I think that would not be a truly bad thing."

Dick grinned at her.

Alfred slid a bigger piece of cheesecake onto Starfire's plate.

"Hey, how come she gets more?" Tim complained.

Alfred fixed a steely stare on the younger man.

Tim wilted, then whined, "It's unfair."

"I do not get to pamper often," Alfred said.

Bruce, Tim and Dick all sat up straighter in their chairs. "You?" Bruce said, his voice rising. "_You_ don't get to pamper."

"He doesn't consider what he does for us pampering," Tim said. "So… what _do_ we get?"

"You, young master," Alfred said, smacking Tim's fingers with a spoon as he tried to reach for another slice. "Are a chore."

Starfire giggled.

**Bump.**

That first showing, the first time Dick could see the definite bump, was an exciting time for him. He was helping Starfire rearrange her potted plants on her balcony, rotating them so they would receive more sun. Lots of lifting and carrying, so he had insisted he help her. He stood on the small a-frame ladder he'd brought to help her since she couldn't fly. As she handed up the chain of one of the pots so he could hang it, her shirt lifted.

And there it was, a gentle rounding. A tiny bulge. That little bump which was his baby.

Dick broke into a broad grin, forgetting everything else.

Starfire lowered the chain until the base of the potted plant rested on her balcony. "What?" she asked, mystified.

"You're showing," he said, that silly grin getting wider.

Starfire frowned. "Showing what?"

His face hurt from the smiling. "Baby."

Starfire blinked. Then blinked again and looked down at her stomach. The chain of the potted plant clattered as she released it to pull up her shirt. "Oh," she said after a moment and spread her fingers across her pelvic region. "_Oh_."

Dick clambered down the ladder, his eyes on her hand. At the bottom, his hand reached out to touch her and, remembering himself at the last moment, stopped. "May I?"

She lifted her hand so he could slip his underneath and he rested his palm against her. It felt different, hard but not muscle hardness. The grin wouldn't stop and Starfire matched him.

"That's amazing."

Starfire beamed, threw her arms around his neck and pulled him in for a hug.

* * *

**_Author's note:_**

_Okay, so, Tim was adopted by Bruce after both his parents died in the comics (long after he became Robin). He, before the new52, was primed to take over Wayne Enterprises, and ran it when Bruce 'died'. Dick became Batman. It's not a tale I'm going to go into for the purposes of this story, so you don't need background beyond Tim is adopted by Bruce. Dick is adopted by Bruce. Ta da. (Although, is this still true in the new52? I'm not keeping up with that)._

_Is it lazy? Yes. But as I said before, this is fanfiction. I will be professional about the grammar and everything like that, but excuse me if I skip over lore that has no basis to be explored in this. It's one of those things I have done so many times before, I don't want to do it again._

**_Pregnancy facts:_**_ Showing starts around… between 12-15 weeks first pregnancy, depending on a lot of factors (ie body type). Sometimes the mums are the last to notice, simply because we look at it every day and don't see the tiny changes which occur. Reminder, Starfire's pregnancy is shorter, she'll show earlier. She's currently 12 weeks. _

_'Morning sickness' is a man named thing. It's more like… general illness. It can strike at anytime, anywhere (although mornings are most common, ie getting out of bed after sleeping often makes you throw up). Some women have all day sickness. Some only get sick once or twice. Everyone is different. I can attest, first pregnancy is often harder, since it's the various hormones which makes you sick, but being pregnant a second time doesn't make you immune. _


	20. Visit

**Visit.**

"All the tests so far indicate everything's going along as expected," Cyborg said, studying the readout. They sat, scattered around Starfire's living room as Cyborg and Raven did their various check-up tests. "There's no precedent for this but Starfire's body is adapting and coping, the baby is growing well for… how far along are you?"

"Sixteen weeks," Starfire said.

"She's… slightly bigger than a human sixteen week old," Cyborg said, studying his scanner. "But your pregnancy doesn't last as long, right?"

"No. It does not."

"Well… I'll keep monitoring every two weeks," Cyborg said. "You let me know if anything feels strange."

"Of course."

"How's the morning sickness?" Raven asked.

Dick chuckled as Starfire pulled a face. "If you have a spell for that, I'm sure Star'd appreciate it."

Raven smiled. "I wish."

"How are all the other symptoms?" Cyborg asked.

"I have lost all use of my powers," Starfire answered. "I am… more skittish when I am not around Dick, but as of yet it is nothing I cannot handle."

"We're… coping as they arise," Dick said, and reached over the back of the sofa to squeeze her shoulder. "It makes life interesting."

"And how are you two coping being around each other all the time?" Raven asked.

Beast Boy looked up from where he wrestled with Silkie. Cyborg busied himself with his arm console. They were both very obvious about listening while trying not to appear too interested.

"It's… had its ups and downs," Dick said, watching Starfire.

"We had misunderstandings," Starfire added. "But we worked through them."

"It's… awkward at times," Dick said.

Starfire nodded. "It is."

Raven narrowed her eyes, reading into what they weren't saying.

"Gah, they're so polite," Beast Boy muttered to Silkie. "Must be hard, bud. All that sexual tension."

"There is no sexual tension," Starfire snapped, rounding on the changeling.

Raven raised an eyebrow at her reaction.

"Dick is doing his best to aid me during this time, there is nothing sexual going on."

Beast Boy raised an eyebrow at Dick. "She's quick to defend."

"Drop it," Dick said, even though Beast Boy was correct. Dick wondered at that.

"Dick is with Babs," Starfire snapped. "They wish to be together. I respect that."

"Does she?" Dick asked, sullen. "Because she hasn't said anything to me. She hasn't spoken to me in months."

"She does," Starfire answered, twisting to see him. "She is… confused. You will see, this will be over soon and you two will be together." She shook her head. "Dick, you and I are friends, nothing more."

Why was he so disappointed with her answer?

"Methinks she does protest— _urk_!" Beast Boy struggled against the black gag across his mouth.

Raven patted Starfire's knee, shooting her fiancé a glare. "Calm down," she said. "Beast Boy's mouth sometimes blurts things out without engaging his brain. Doesn't it, Gar?"

Beast Boy looked mollified and nodded.

"Aha!" Cyborg said, startling them all. He glanced around and looked sheepish. "Sorry."

"Aha, what?" Dick asked, glad for the distraction.

Grinning, Cyborg pressed a few buttons on his arm and a small cone of light was emitted. Within the cone, a spinning picture of a mostly formed baby. "Your daughter."

Dick leapt over the sofa in his haste to take a closer look, Starfire pouncing on Cyborg too. She gripped Cyborg's arm, holding it between her and Dick so they were on opposite sides.

"Oh, wow."

"Look at her fingers!" Starfire exclaimed.

"So tiny," Raven murmured.

"She looks perfect," Dick said.

"She looks like an alien," Beast Boy said.

As one, the four of them looked at him.

"Well, she _does_," Beast Boy complained. "Her head is so big, her eyes are so far apart and she's… she's _HAIRY_.Look at those eyebrows!"

"She's not done cooking, B," Cyborg said. "All the necessary parts are growing though. Nine stomachs, only two kidneys instead of three. She has a liver, she'll be able to get drunk."

"You're not taking my daughter drinking," Dick said, failing at being stern.

Cyborg winked at him before he continued, "She has the Tamaranian _er'kan_ node."

Starfire gasped and her eyes filled with tears. "She will _fly_."

"Oh, great," Dick said, grinning. "That'll be a handful."

"She would've been a handful anyway, she's related to you," Beast Boy said.

"Tamaranian bone density," Cyborg continued, reading his arm. "She'll be tougher than her dad."

"Good," Dick said.

"Lungs are interesting, I can't tell if she'll be able to survive in space, but they're not fully formed yet. I'll run some more tests. All in all, that's her."

"She is beautiful," Starfire said.

"She is," Dick agreed.

"So, do you guys have names yet?" Beast Boy asked.

Both Starfire and Dick looked at the changeling, then at each other. "We… haven't discussed that yet."

"We should," Starfire replied.

Dick nodded and turned his eyes back to the holographic image of his daughter. "Yeah. We should."

**Touch.**

Starfire lay, dressed in one of Dick's pre-worn shirts and a pair of shorts, half-asleep on the couch as the rest of the movie she'd been watching played on the TV. Her knees were bent, her toes tucked under Dick's thigh. Dick sat beside her, working on the laptop balanced on his knees. It was late, Dick's watch read half-past-eleven, a long time beyond what he normally stayed at night, but he was loathe to move at the present time, having caught the tail end of an idea related to the case Nightwing was currently working on.

Dick glanced over at her to check how asleep she was. Starfire would tell him when he'd overstayed his welcome, she was very good at dropping subtle hints that perhaps it was time to go, but tonight it seemed she was comforted by his silent presence.

The computer alerted him it had completed compiling the information he'd asked for and he settled down to read.

His hand curled around her calf, tucked under her knee, his thumb slowly stroking against the skin.

The report was more in-depth than he expected. Drug rings, the cartel had sunk roots deep in Bludhaven. It would take a lot of work to drag this one out. He began to pick out weak points in the ring, members who had more to lose than others, members who could be bribed, or put in jail for other crimes, and thus weaken the overall regime of the cartel.

He lifted his hand from her calf so he could type, jotting down notes. Plans of action, things he needed to look at and accomplish.

This man, this man, this… El Theo, he'd be Dick's first weak point to exploit. Clicking on the link, Dick brought all the personal details he'd been able to gather.

Her toes wriggled under his leg, so he put his hand back where it belonged, his thumb stroking and she ceased moving and sighed contently. He glanced at her, smiling as he saw her eyes were closed so he turned his attention back to the computer.

Dick'd start there. El Theo had snitched before, there was a long list of black marks against his name, character references from police. Just look at what they had to say, there was _years_ of information to go through. It was almost as though El Theo been planted in the cartel… hmm that was an interesting concept, Dick'd need to dig into that deeper. El Theo was neck deep in debt and he had access to several people further up the chain. He was a good marksman but not good enough to be a forerunner of the operation.

Starfire stirred. "Dick?"

"Hmm?" he asked, his head lifting but he didn't look at her.

Stretching out her hand, she touched her fingers to his and tugged. His hand was separated from the warmth which was her leg. Only a small amount of attention diverted from the report to what she was doing.

Dick wasn't sure how he'd get to the man yet, or where El Theo could lead him but –_why was his arm stretched out_– just looking at the man's acquaintances, Dick was sure it could lead –_his hand was warm, soft flesh_— higher up in the cartel.

"Dick?"

"Hmm."

There were three possible heads for the cartel, –_it's her stomach_– El Theo might be the key to getting all three. Mexican names again –_her stomach's nudging_–, lots of El names, they really did like that. Dick wondered if he'd be able to track them all the way back, –_there it is again_– whether or not they had ties. Sometimes it was impossible to tell who ran it on paper. Sometimes there was a public figurehead _–oh, it's the baby–_and someone else ran the operation in the background.

"Dick."

His head lifted again, his eyes glued to the screen. He almost had it. "Hang on."

Sometimes there was more than one head, _–the baby's moving–_ which mean he could play on in fighting within the cartel itself. Once the cartel was out of the way, or severely weakened, he could –_focus on the baby_– focus on the drug lords themselves.

_The baby was moving._

Dick blinked. Turned his head. "Huh?"

Starfire smiled and tapped him with her foot. "Are you here now?" she teased.

Another little bump against the palm of his hand, just a tiny tap.

The laptop clattered off his lap as he twisted to face her. His leg bumped hers, squished her knees higher and she lifted her legs so he could slip between them and get both hands on her belly. "She's moving!"

"She is," Starfire said.

"How long…?"

"I have been feeling her for a few days," Starfire murmured, glancing down at his hands. "But nothing as strong. I was not sure if you could feel it yet."

He spread the fingers of both hands, trying to increase the surface area and waited.

Another little nudge.

Dick's face split into a grin. "Oh, that's awesome."

Starfire beamed.

**Lost.**

Dick walked down the street, pulling his jacket around him tighter to protect himself from the chill of the wind in the night air. He'd just finished his regular patrol, his Nightwing suit hidden beneath his clothes. He'd do another sweep after he'd picked up Starfire from her late night shoot. She had his car, his pick-up wasn't necessary, but he figured she'd feel safe if he saw her home.

Her pregnancy wasn't public, yet. She'd informed her agency of the situation but Dick expected there would be a leak very soon. If nothing had come by the weekend, Starfire and Dick had plans to go for day around the town to be seen, sporting Starfire's belly. They were still giving the outwardly appearance of dating, less kissing, while in public. Media had speculated on their relationship, but since they hadn't commented, played up or played down anything between them, the press had gotten bored. Dick suspected the interest would increase again once the pregnancy was confirmed.

Neither of them had yet breached the topic of public break up. Dick thought that would be hard, seeing the media would still find him going around to Starfire's place with regular frequency. They'd both agreed once Starfire started showing, they'd 'break up', but since Starfire had no real interest in speaking about it, Dick didn't either.

Her agency switched her from the catwalk and full body shoots to glamour shots. With her features and alien eyes, Dick thought she'd be pretty popular. She didn't have too many late nights anymore because of that, but she'd called him at work and said this one would run late. Something about malfunctioning equipment and only having the space for a period of twenty four hours.

It was fine, the studio she was at wasn't far off his normal patrol route. He looked forward to seeing her and she always brightened when she saw him. It was a nice feeling. A naturalness slowly returned to their friendship, something which Dick enjoyed.

A fire truck drove past him, its lights flashing. A few seconds later, a police car zipped by.

Frowning, Dick reached into his pocket and pulled out his earpiece so he could contact Robin. "Tim?"

"_Yeah_?" he replied a few seconds later and by the speed Dick knew there was not much on in Gotham tonight. Robin sounded relieved at the interruption.

"Can you ask Babs to check for 911 alerts around Seventeenth Avenue, please?

Robin, quite used to relaying these sorts of messages by now, did what he was asked. A few moments later he replied with, "_Some sort of explosion on Mitchell's street_," he said.

"Not 201 Mitchell?" Dick asked, his heart suddenly pounding.

"_Ahh_…" Robin hesitated, probably double checking. "_Yeah, why_?"

Dick started sprinting. "Fuck." He fished his pocket for his cell and hit Starfire's speed dial. "C'mon, c'mon, pick up."

"_What's wrong_?" Robin asked.

"_Greetings, you have reached the cell phone of Starfire—"_

"That's where Starfire is."

"_What_?" Oracle shrilled through his earpiece.

He'd always suspected Oracle listened in, now he had proof. And it didn't matter in the slightest. He didn't care about anything else, just Starfire and her safety. "Babs," he said, still running full throttle. "I want all the surveillance around 201 Mitchell's street you can find. Get me eyes."

"_On it."_

"_Try her phone_," Robin suggested.

Another fire truck went by and Dick could now see the blaze brightening the night sky. He pushed himself faster. "Tried. Got message bank."

"_Do you need us_?" Batman murmured.

"Let me scope."

He skidded around the corner and got his first good look at the building. There was a massive hole blasted out of the second floor, flames shooting toward the sky. The ground below was scattered with broken glass and damaged brickwork. Most of the windows in the building were shattered.

People milled out the front. Spectators and police to hold the spectators back as the fire crew worked to quell the fire. Dick scanned the area as quickly as he could.

No Starfire.

But he spotted Emma, one of the assistants Starfire often worked with, standing on the inside of the police barrier, talking to a uniform he didn't recognise. Pushing through the crowd of spectators, Dick called her name.

She turned her head and Dick could see she'd been crying. "Dick?"

Reaching the edge of the barrier, he gripped it with both hands. "Are you okay? What happened? Where's Starfire?"

"Sir," the policeman said. "We can't give out information yet, stay behind the line—"

"He's family," Emma said. "That's Starfire's boyfriend."

Dick saw no reason to correct her.

The policeman turned sympathetic, then gestured for Dick to cross the barrier. "At this point we have little confirmed information—"

"A man came and _stole_ her," Emma blurted, grabbing Dick's arm. "Picked her up, blasted the building with some sort of green energy that came from his eyes and flew out the window. She was screaming, Dick. Her hits did _nothing_ on him."

"Big man?" Dick asked, filling with dread. "Red hair? Same sort of purple uniform Starfire wears?"

Emma nodded.

Dick tried desperately not to panic. "Do you know which direction he headed?"

Emma pointed.

Dick followed her finger then looked back at her. "Are you okay?"

She nodded. "No one was hurt."

He burst with nervous energy, only Emma's hand on his arm kept him anchored to her. "Is someone coming for you?"

"Yes—"

He was off and running before she even finished her sentence. He had to get high, somewhere he could see everything. Ducking into an alleyway and not particularly caring who saw him at the moment, he used the brickwork to scale the building toward the roof. "Babs, I want a global alert. No alien craft of any kind in or out of our space, nor alien themselves. Complete lockdown. Use the Watch Tower to scan for alien life; we're looking for two Tamaranians in close proximity somewhere on Earth."

"_What's going on_?" Robin asked.

On the roof, Dick shed his clothing, making sure he had all personal belongings from the pockets of his clothes, in case he never came back. Eyes sweeping the horizon, looking for any sign. He had to hope they'd remain in Bludhaven, but he knew that chance was bleak. Gloves snapped on, mask slapped on his face.

"_We're on our way_," Batman said, realising what was occurring. "_Tell me you have a tracker on her_."

"I have a tracker in her handbag. She mightn't have it on her." He reached for the control and activated the tracker, waiting for the satellites to configure.

"_Dick_—"

"It's a bit hard when her job makes her take off all her clothes!" Lifting his fist, he hit the remote to summon the N'wing.

"_Dick, what's going on? Why on the whole of Earth_?" Robin asked.

"Because she can't breathe in space right now," Nightwing replied. "V'aan's got her and I don't know where he's taken her. He's going to try and make her abort."

* * *

**_Author's Note:_**

_Pregnancy facts: The quickening (or first baby movements) occurs between 16-20 weeks. Later for some people, earlier if it's not your first pregnancy (because you know what it feels like). Sometimes you have to wait a long time between movements, others there's a series of them all at once, then nothing for ages. At first, it's a fluttery feeling which will get stronger as time goes on. Quickening is best felt when lying down. It'll be longer before the guy gets to feel, often around 18-20 weeks, just because it has to go through the womb and skin too. They normally get to feel the kicks, rather than just the little flutters. (Baby hiccups are the cutest thing the first time you feel them, but toward the end of your pregnancy you'll be saying "Oh god not again")  
_

_Also, I'll put this here. __**Pregnant belly's are not public touch zones**__. Never, ever, __**ever**__ touch a pregnant belly unless you are a) her partner, b) the doctor/midwife, c) invited. It is rude and the mother will probably snap your neck. I lost track of the amount of times my co-workers thought it would be okay to pat my belly, which is okay to a degree, but the amount of strangers who think they can too is __**insane**__. I don't care if you're the baby's brother/sister/aunt/uncle. If you're old enough to read this, you're old enough to ask permission first._


	21. Protector

_**Author's Note: **__Using Blackfire as the villian for everything which goes wrong in Starfire's life is old and cliche (for me). So, no. Blackfire is not involved. As much as she hates Starfire, I doubt she'd want her niece injured._

_How on Earth did I get to 21 chapters. This was supposed to be a quickie!_

* * *

**Protector.**

Nightwing wasn't lucky enough for Starfire to have somehow managed to keep her handbag in all the mayhem which had occurred in the abduction. It showed her still being inside the burning building on Mitchell's street.

However, Nightwing had a direction, so that's the way he went. The N'wing skimmed along the top of the buildings, Bludhaven passing below, the computer working overtime as it ran scans for heat signatures and alien structures.

He had to find her. He had to. Before V'aan took her offworld. Before he tried to coax her to abort. Before he killed her because she wouldn't.

Starfire was his… was the mother of his child. He had promised to protect her. He'd sworn to protect their child. And he was failing in that promise.

Every second he didn't find her was another second V'aan had the advantage. If it was V'aan and not one of his lackeys.

"Babs?" he snapped, his voice sharp.

"_Nothing yet," _she responded.

He growled.

"_Superman on route to Watch Tower_," Oracle continued. "_Titans on alert, Raven is being summoned from Azarath and Herald from the nether. Estimated ETA until complete activation, fifteen minutes via Herald. Cyborg reports Herald will send the T-Ship to any location you request the minute he's through. Raven will take longer. _"

Nightwing nodded, his fingers flicking switches. "Good."

"_We're about seven minutes from your location_," Batman said.

None of the searches he ran reported anything of value. "When I get my hands on this bastard—"

"_Calm down_," Oracle said. "_You won't do anyone any good if you lose your temper_—"

He flicked another switch, grabbing the pair of escrima sticks the N'wing deployed and thrust them into the holders on his back. "Don't you _dare_ tell me to—"

"_We'll find her_," Oracle said.

"We'd better," he snapped.

"_She'll be fine, Dick. She's strong_—"

"She's _not_. No matter what she says, she's not strong right now and I _promised_ I'd protect her. I never should've left her alone."

Silence and then, "_I knew this would happen_."

Nightwing scowled. "You knew _what_ would—"

A green beam lit up the sky to the left of him. Before it could even dim, Nightwing had plotted a point of origin. The N'wing swung in its direction and as it darted closer, Nightwing could see smoke rising from the old junkyard where the beam had come from.

"_Did you see that_?" Robin asked.

"_Plotting intercept_," Batman said. "_Dick, wait for backup."_

"Not on your life," Nightwing returned and hit the deploy button on his plane the moment he was in range. The N'wing shifted to autopilot and opened the hatch.

Not the smartest of ideas, on the whole. He was too high, too fast, too competent in aiming. A fraction of a second after the hatch opened, Nightwing knew he would not be landing softly. V'aan would know he was coming.

And he decided that was perfect.

"_God damn it, Dick!" _Batman chided and Nightwing turned his earpiece to silent.

He hit the top of a car, the metal clattering as it contracted beneath his feet, the car itself -poised upon a pile of broken metal- toppled, clattering down the mountain of junk. A quick somersault to take some of the speed before he bounded off the trunk of another car, which also dislodged. Leaping high, he shot his grapping hook for the large, overhead crane.

He didn't care what kind of environment he entered; he'd deal with it when he got there.

So much adrenaline surged through his system. It gave heightened reaction time, the benefit of clarity.

He saw so many things as he swung.

There was an alien pod, small, cylindrical, with a simple hatched door. The door was open but he couldn't see inside.

A fresh bloody handprint on the door.

A fire burnt, particles of flame drifted down through the air, ashes. Broken and burning wood piles, metal drums filled with flame, the remnants of a homeless camp. The fire sucked the light, the piles of junk trapped shadows beneath its twisted metal arms.

V'aan. He'd known it was V'aan. Nightwing scolded himself, he should have been more watchful. Should've given Starfire something she wore permanently so that he could track her if needed. V'aan looked angry as he tore through a rusted car, tossing the pieces of it away like paper, nursing a slice on his chest.

For a moment, Nightwing pondered if he should switch to nightvision, but decided it he didn't want to go blind. Eyebeams and fire.

Starfire… where was she? _Where was she_? Was she in the pod? Why was V'aan looking through the car?

The sound of the dislodged car as it crashed down the junk pile made V'aan turn. By then it was too late, the swinging projectile Nightwing had turned himself into slammed into V'aan's chest, forcing him into the torn car. Nightwing's knees bent, trying to take some of the jar, and he pushed off to leap away. Landing a small distance away, on the dirt tracks between the mountains of junk, Nightwing's feet skidded on the ground to take the remaining momentum, one arm thrust out, the other on the ground to keep his balance.

"You don't know when to take no for an answer."

V'aan roared as he tore apart the car so he could escape.

Nightwing pulled the escrima sticks from his back. Spinning them, he grinned at V'aan. "C'mon then."

True to any Tamaranian attack, as Nightwing had learnt from Starfire, V'aan went straight for a strength attack and launched himself at Nightwing with double fists clenched and outstretched. For someone who had spent _years_ training with a Tamaranian with more sophisticated fighting attacks, Nightwing found it easy to evade. Like a madatore evading a bull, he side-stepped, slamming one of his sticks down on V'aan's back.

V'aan ate dirt. With another roar, he thumped the ground and pushed off, flying up into the air. His eyes flared, giving Nightwing the precious seconds he needed to cast a smoke pellet at V'aan's face and evade the eyebeam.

While V'aan was distracted, Nightwing ran for the pod. "Star!" he called as he reached it.

It was empty. He cast his frantic gaze around the ground, looking for signs as he extracted several bombs from his gauntlet compartment. Droplets of blood, footprints in the dirt leading toward the car V'aan had been tearing apart. Dropping the bombs into the pod, he darted away from it. "Starfire!"

The smoke cleared from V'aan's face, the man's eyes weeping. Nightwing didn't think he'd be able to eyebeam again. Nightwing readied his sticks again as the interior of the pod exploded.

"Looks like you won't be taking her that way."

V'aan charged him. "Peasant, how dare you—"

"Toro!" Nightwing laughed as he dodged, smashing his sticks into V'aan's side.

The man staggered, clutching at his chest. "A true warrior would not rely on weapons." He clenched his hands into fists.

Nightwing ducked and wove around the punches, using his sticks to whack at pressure points on V'aan's body whenever he could. "A true warrior wouldn't go after pregnant women. I don't think you can quibble about two-" Double hits to a kidney "-little-" Strikes to the weak point on V'aan's neck "-_sticks_." The sticks cracked against V'aan's chin and sent the man crashing to the ground. "Why are you here?" Nightwing snarled.

V'aan held on to his chin as he lay on the ground. "Our bloodline will cement my claim to the throne."

"Is your position really that perilous?" Nightwing questioned, circling V'aan with his sticks pointed directly at the man's head. "A fiercesome warrior like you. You need to force the princess to bear your children?"

"She is mine!" V'aan yelled. "She was promised to me!"

"She was promised to a lot of people," Nightwing snarled. "Blame her father for that."

"I will have her—"

"She _chose_ me. And doesn't that just burn you up inside."

Wrong thing to say. V'aan was quicker on the eyebeam than Nightwing expected. He took it straight in the chest. Heat sizzled, the suit negating some of the burn but not the force of the hit. It was strong enough to knock him off his feet.

He hit the ground on his shoulders and had just enough time to raise his sticks in defence before V'aan was on him.

Pain rippled across Nightwing's face as V'aan struck him. He couldn't do much against this sort of strength, not in close combat. He wriggled and writhed, throwing his body from side to side in an effort to dislodge the man, turning all the hits from V'aan into glancing blows. In his frantic movements, Nightwing managed to get his foot on V'aan's stomach, shoving him hard. At the same time, Nightwing stuck the ends of his sticks onto V'aan's bare chest and hit the electrify button.

V'aan convulsed, froth forming at his mouth. Protected by his suit, Nightwing kicked the man from him, keeping the sticks on his chest until the charge was done.

Nightwing got to his feet, watching V'aan for any sign of movement. Spinning his sticks, he returned them to their holsters. Satisfied V'aan wouldn't be moving any time soon, Nightwing turned his attention to the junk piles around them. "Starfire!"

He scampered to the car V'aan had torn apart, his eyes scanning the wreckage. "Star!"

Nothing. No sign of her. She'd either ran, or found someplace to hide.

Reaching into his gauntlet, he extracted his flare and shot it into the sky so he could see and signal his location. Batman would be close, if he wasn't already in the junkyard. He activated his earpiece again. "V'aan's down. Anyone seen Star?"

"_Dick, if you cut us off like that again—" _Oracle snarled.

"Starfire. Have. You. Seen. Her?"

"_No,"_ Robin said. "_I'm still in the plane, I'll do a pass. She wasn't with him?"_

NIghtwing's head swivelled as he tried to look for signs. _"_Looks like she had a chance to run and took it. I destroyed the pod V'aan wanted to use to take her."

"_Making my way to you,"_ Batman said.

Nightwing clambered up the junk pile for a better view. "V'aan's unbound, I haven't got anything strong enough to detain."

"_Oracle, give Superman the coordinates."_

_"Right."_

Nightwing reached the top, lifting his arm to wave at the Batplane as it zipped overhead. Cupping his hands over his mouth, he bellowed. "_Starfire_!"

_"Ow, Dick!" _Oracle complained.

_"_Sorry."

_"No, you're—"_

_"Dick," _Robin interrupted. "_I'm picking up multiple heat signatures, scattered all over."_

_"Guessing homeless?" _Oracle said.

"Star runs hotter_," _Nightwing supplied.

_"Too many variables… narrowing."_

Nightwing bounded down the junk pile, landing on the next road over. He studied the dirt, looking for tracks, but nothing leapt out at him. He scanned the piles around him. So many places to hide, so many nooks. She wouldn't stay here, would she? She'd… she'd run. As fast as she could, as far as she could.

"Just give me one of the locs," Nightwing snapped, too anxious to stand still. "Let me check it."

_"Fifty feet to your right."_

Nightwing took off running.

"_Batman_," Robin continued. "_There's one ten feet to your_—"

"_Homeless_," Batman responded.

Nightwing peered through the junk, dragging out his small flashlight to search. He spotted the small nest, the man sleeping inside. "Mine too."

"_Nightwing, thirty feet south. Batman, twenty feet east_."

"_You're really going to check each_?" Oracle asked.

"Do you have a better idea?" Nightwing replied, scampering up the next pile of junk.

"_Ahh…_"

"Do you have eyes on the area?" Nightwing asked. "Can you tell where she's gone if she's not here?"

"_No_."

"Then don't _fucking_ tell me—"

"_Nightwing_," Batman chided.

Nightwing swallowed his anger. His flashlight swung, darting from shadow to shadow as he searched the junk.

"_Nothing," _Batman said.

"I'm not seeing—"

"Dick?"

Nightwing swivelled.

Starfire stood, hidden in the shadows between a broken wardrobe and a vertical bed, with a long piece of metal piping held up like a baseball bat. She wore torn jeans and what looked to be a designer jacket, which had been ripped in several places. Her feet were bare and he guessed they'd be cut.

Nightwing rushed to her as the piping slipped from her fingers and she sagged. Catching her by the upper arms, he heaved her into a hug, crushing her to his chest. "I got you," he murmured. He put his palm against the back of her head to support it, his other arm across her back to hold her up. "It's okay. I got you."

"_You got her?" _Oracle asked.

Her legs were as limp as a rag doll but she clutched at him just as much. "I- oh Dick- he tried- and- so fast- I thought—" She babbled, nothing coherent enough for him to make out more than a few words at a time.

_"Heading to secure. Robin, meet me there."_

He brushed her hair away from his face. "Hey, look at me. Star, look at me." He gave her a little shake to prompt her to listen. When she did, he smiled. "It's okay. I'm here. You're okay."

"I would not allow him to take me," Starfire panted hard between words. She gripped his upper arms. "I would not."

"I know," he murmured, resting his forehead on hers. "You did good. Breathe."

Starfire gulped in a massive breath, hiccupped and tried to slow her breathing. "I thought I would never see you again." One of the tears gathered in her eyes spilled down over her cheek. "I could not bear that."

"I promised to protect you," Nightwing murmured, their noses brushing. "I'll always come."

"_Superman's a few minutes away," _Oracle said, her voice strained. _"Green Lantern's coming from the other direction."_

Nightwing lifted his head away from Starfire's, remembering who was listening. "C'mon," he said, bending over to scoop Starfire's legs up. She hugged his neck with both arms, her nose buried so it touched his chin. "Let's get you—"

"_He's not here_," Batman said.

"What?"

"_V'aan's not here_. _You said by the pod_?"

Dread filled Nightwing. "Yes."

"_Then he's_—"

A flash of light to his left was all the warning Nightwing got. He bent his knees, leaping forward moments before an eyebeam crashed into the wooden wardrobe beside them, the closet shattering with a loud crack. Some of the wood hit his ankle, making his landing extra hard and he ended up on one knee.

Nightwing made sure to cushion Starfire as much as he could. He couldn't roll or tumble, not holding her, so there was nothing he could do when the eyebeam slammed into his back.

Among the force of the blow and how he was thrown, Nightwing lost his grip on Starfire. He hit the dirt, skidding until he ended up against the junk pile.

"I knew if I feigned sleep, you would find her for me."

Nightwing groaned in pain and placed his palms against the ground to push up, only to find a boot in the middle of his back, holding him down.

"I am curious. Just how much do humans depend upon their spine?"

Nightwing turned his head, trying to see if he could make a grab at the man, but V'aan hovered above him, two feet against him now. One lower on his back, the other between his shoulder blades. Nightwing grit his teeth in pain as the toe of V'aan boots dug into his back.

"Leave him!" Starfire snarled.

Nightwing twisted to try and see her. "Starfire! Run! _Go_!"

"Just how much do you care for this one?" V'aan said, reaching down to grab Nightwing by the scruff of his neck. Nightwing was hoisted up into the air and turned until he could see Starfire.

Ready in a fighting position, clearly favouring one leg, she had both Nightwing's escrima sticks clenched and held up. She met his eyes briefly and adjusted her grip on the sticks. "You would be surprised at what I would give up for him," she snarled.

Nightwing fought not to smirk, because that would give the game away. V'aan had made a massive mistake, picking up like that. He wasn't an acrobat for nothing.

"Such fight for a breeder," V'aan said. "You are wasted—"

Nightwing bent, lifting both legs straight up, then flung them backward. His boot landed in V'aan's armpit, hitting the sensitive nerves there and forcing V'aan to release him. He threw himself forward both hands planting as his legs continued upward. A flip and he was positioned in front of Starfire, spare staff extended. "Gotta warn you," Nightwing said, twisting his neck from side to side to loosen pinched muscles. "A shitload of trouble is about to descend."

V'aan attacked. Nightwing used his staff to block, striking out with the other end of it when he had a chance. He punished V'aan each time he could, Starfire pressing her own attack when she was in range. Starfire went for the head shots, the escrima's better for whacking at the vital points and Nightwing knew she was more aware of them than he was. Nightwing focused on keeping V'aan angry enough with him.

Nightwing upper-cut with his staff, folding backward to continue the upper-cut blows with both his feet. Starfire moved in, smacking V'aan with both sticks in the back. Crouched on the ground, Nightwing swung his staff, catching V'aan's legs, then punched him in the ribcage, right on the slice.

V'aan yowled. Nightwing kicked him in the chest, forcing him to stumble toward Starfire, who swung her sticks like dual tennis racquets and caught V'aan's face.

Blood on V'aan's lip, burns on his chest from the electrified escrimas, a bloody cut, Nightwing was sure they could wear him down. The danger was in the hits, if V'aan managed to land one, they were in trouble. Fighting V'aan was different than when Nightwing had fought against the royal guard on Tamaran. There, he'd been so focused on getting through the guards as quick as possible. Attack and move on while they were surprised or unfocused. Whereas here, he was required to go one on one with an opponent much stronger than him. While Nightwing had fought Starfire, Cyborg and a collection of other people physically stronger than him, there was a real difference between a mock battle and someone doing his best to kill.

Blackfire's alien wrestling, which had really been a manipulation on Blackfire's part to unsettle Starfire, had taught him jack-all about fighting normal Tamaranians.

They stalled for time. Time for Superman. Time for Batman. If Nightwing had the opportunity, he'd face off against this bastard all day, but Starfire and his child were priority. He would not risk them.

V'aan threw a punch, Nightwing swinging his staff to block. The staff shattered, V'aan must have thrown a lot more strength into the punch than normal and Nightwing took the blow in the chest. He felt several ribs crack in response, the pain shooting through his chest like a dozen knives and his breath was expelled so rapidly it winded him. He was thrown backward and into a junk pile and all the accompanying spikes of pain which came with that.

Starfire screamed.

Nightwing's head rang, his vision swam. He couldn't breathe, couldn't gasp. He hurt.

"This is your protector?" V'aan sneered and Starfire's cry was cut off with a gargle.

A shadow fell over him and Nightwing looked up at V'aan.

"I will rid you of this—"

"_No_!"

Everything went green.


	22. Out of the frying pan and into the fire

**Out of the frying pan and into the fire.**

The world burnt.

Nightwing could feel the heat but V'aan took the brunt of the blast. It hurt Nightwing's eyes, even with his hand shielding them it was difficult to see anything. The ground seemed to rumble, junk crashed away, the flammable items catching fire.

Confused bubbled. Green Lantern's powers didn't burn. Not like this. He made constructs, not energy. Did anyone else on the Justice League create green energy, Nightwing couldn't remember.

He could see… he squinted, forcing himself to concentrate. He could see _Starfire_, in the middle of the origin point, screaming. It didn't look like she had much control over the release… she shouldn't _be_ releasing. She had no powers.

The baby _fed_ on energy.

And Starfire was using _their baby's food_ to blast V'aan.

"Starfire!" Nightwing bellowed.

She didn't hear him.

"Starfire! _Stop it_!"

Starfire shuddered and the beam blasting V'aan ceased. She inhaled the energy, that was the only word Nightwing had which even came close. Her body rigid and risen up her toes, she gathered the power to her and drank it. It whirled around her, a tornado of energy, spiralling inwards. When it was consumed, Starfire staggered, her legs collapsing beneath her.

Neither of them were in any shape to defend themselves.

It didn't matter. V'aan was disabled, Nightwing could see V'aan wasn't getting up from that blast.

"What the _hell_ was that?" Nightwing snarled, pain and worry morphing into anger.

She looked at him in dismay. "What did I do?" Hands fluttered around her face, as horrified as he was about what had occurred. "_How_-?"

Her reaction didn't stop him lashing out. "You endangered our child!"

"I did not mean to!" she protested.

"She feeds off your energy and you just _wasted_—"

"He was going to kill you—"

"And you might have killed her!"

Starfire went pale, her head snapping back like he'd struck her. Her hands covered her head, crook of her elbows to her face and she curled forward into a ball around her belly.

Batman swooped down, his boots thumping against the ground.

With an arm across his chest, Nightwing pried himself from the junk. He made it to his feet, staying doubled over to catch his breath before he straightened. His ribs screamed out in protest at the movement and he hoped Raven would hurry.

By the time he was upright, Batman had knelt down by Starfire, his cape covering her back and his hand between her shoulder blades.

"I see I'm too late," Superman said, floating down from the sky.

Nightwing half turned, grimacing in pain.

"You've got several broken ribs there, Nightwing," Superman said immediately. "Your lungs are fine but you shouldn't be moving."

"I'm fine," Nightwing dismissed. "Check Starfire."

"X-rays on a pregnant lady isn't advisable," Batman said.

"Heartbeat on baby then," Nightwing snapped.

Superman was silent for a moment. "And what's the average heart-beats-per-second for a Tamaranian-slash-human hybrid at however many weeks you are?"

Nightwing considered. "Ahh… I don't…"

"It's beating," Superman said. "I can't tell you anything more."

That knowledge drained some of his anger, but it still buzzed through him along with the pain.

"Superman, deliver General V'aan to Arkham," Batman said, still kneeling. "Stand watch until we're ready to deal with him. Tell Warden Sharp to use inhibitor code one-two-five-A." He turned his head. "Take Green Lantern."

Superman nodded. He picked up V'aan over one shoulder and lifted off, gesturing to Green Lantern who had just arrived for an escort.

Batman continued, "Robin, bring the Batplane, you're taking Starfire. Nightwing, call your plane. I'll ride with you to the Batcave. Oracle, contact the Titans—"

"I'm going with Starfire."

Batman gave him a look. "After that yelling, you're coming with me."

Nightwing shrunk back, chastised.

"Oracle, tell the Titans to stand down, bar the three. Give them emergency access to the Batcave."

TTTTT

The problem with riding shotgun with Batman was the silence; it always gave Nightwing too long to think. Too long to worry about the lecture he was going to get for yelling at Starfire. So he jumped the gun and defended himself.

"I was right to yell at her," he reasoned, his hand pressed to his side as he tried to contain the pain of his ribs. They ached with every breath and it only seemed to fuel the anger he felt.

"Hmm-mmm," Batman said, idly flicking several switches to even out their angle.

Nightwing glanced forward at the Batplane flying point. "She endangered herself, and our child, with that release of energy."

"If you say so."

"She should've run and hid! I told her to go, why didn't she listen?"

"She should've let V'aan kill you," Batman stated.

"Yes! I mean. No. _Well_…" He huffed. "She might have damaged the baby!"

"Because it certainly wasn't any sort of Tamaranian last resort defence mechanism."

Was it? Maybe it was but, "She said she loses all her powers! She _lied_ to me."

"And her wellbeing isn't directly tied to yours. At all."

Nightwing kicked the back of the chair to annoy Batman. "You're on _her_ side."

"I'm not on anyone's side."

"Then why—"

"I'm pointing out things you would remember were you rational."

"I am rational!"

"You're in pain. The woman carrying your child was kidnapped, threatened and injured. You're not rational, Dick."

"I am! She's the one who—"

"Is pregnant. Is vulnerable for the first time in her life. Is hurting and emotionally compromised because her mate yelled at her."

"I'm not her _mate_," Nightwing protested.

Batman snorted.

"I'm not!"

Batman fell silent.

"What's that supposed to mean, anyway?"

"What's what supposed to mean?" Batman questioned as Gotham sped beneath. He flicked a switch and started their descent toward the Batcave.

Nightwing copied Batman's snort.

"It doesn't mean anything."

"_Everything_ you do means something."

Batman sighed. "You have to make up your own mind, Dick. I can't do it for you."

"My own mind about what?"

Batman went silent again.

"Bruce!"

"No."

Nightwing huffed. "Fat lot of good you are then."

Batman sighed. "When you're calm enough, think about this; what are relationships like on Tamaran?"

"Exactly like they are on Earth!" The yell forced him to cough, which had him writhing in pain, the bumps from the landing didn't help.

"Settle down," Batman advised. "We're here."

"Ow," he whimpered.

"Stay away from Starfire until we've looked you over."

"I need to—"

The hatch of the N'wing slid back. "You need to listen to me," Batman told him. "Alfred will take care of Starfire."

Nightwing glanced over to the Batplane, seeing Alfred and Robin helping Starfire from the plane. She looked shaken, her skin almost a pale peach instead of vibrant orange. Nightwing nodded. "Yeah. Okay."

TTTTT

Dick grit his teeth, his uniform gathered around his hips, as Bruce tied ice packs his chest. It was the worst part about having broken rips, the ice packs and the feeling of his ribs moving every time he breathed. Starfire was occupying the medical bay at present and Dick felt a little resentful that both Bruce and Alfred had denied him access.

Beast Boy poked his head around the corner. "All right there?"

Dick just groaned in pain. "Where's Raven?"

"Hello to you too."

He wasn't in the mood. "Gar—"

"She's checking Starfire," Beast Boy said. "She won't be long."

"Can I go see her now?" Dick asked, glowering at Bruce.

Bruce turned away, packing up the first aid kit. "As long as you're civil. I'll contact Bludhaven police, let them know Starfire's been recovered."

Dick slid down from the bench, grimacing with every movement. He put a palm to his chest, but that did little to the pain.

"Need a hand?" Beast Boy asked.

"Please, no," Dick replied, holding up his hand. "Hurts too much."

"How many ribs did you break?"

"Four."

"Ouch."

"Yup. Tamaranian fist to the chest, I'm surprised it didn't kill me."

"Well you always were a bit rubbery," Beast Boy commented.

"Thanks." Dick rested his hand on Beast Boy's shoulder, allowing the smaller man to offer him the semblance of support.

Starfire was… either asleep or spelled unconscious when they arrived in the medical bay. Cyborg was on one side of her, studying his arm console, while Raven held glowing hands over Starfire's leg.

Cyborg glanced up. "Hey."

"Hey. How's she doing?"

Cyborg looked down at his console and pursed his lips.

Dick twitched nervously. "Cy, how are they?"

Cyborg sighed. "They're both distressed. I'm not sure if the baby is picking up Starfire's distress or not."

Dick felt sick.

"Heartbeat is stable, but high. There's lots of activity going on right now, baby is moving a lot, but I can't see a cause."

"Starfire discharged," Dick choked out. "All that energy was supposed to go to the baby and she used it on V'aan."

"Hmm," Cyborg said and began to scan again. "Her energy level is a little low, but nothing alarming. I don't think it harmed the baby, if that's what you're worried about."

Dick felt the panic draining away from him, leaving him weak.

Raven lifted her hand from Starfire's leg and placed it over her belly. Dick saw the long, angry and newly healed scar on her leg and wondered when she'd gotten that during the fight. Turning her eyes to Dick, Raven said, "I'll reduce those breaks in a moment."

"Thanks."

Beast Boy sniffed the air. "Cy… check Starfire's hormones. She smells odd."

Cyborg raised an eyebrow, but nodded. "Nothing out of the ordinary that I could tell. Fear perhaps?"

Beast Boy scratched his head and shrugged. "Maybe."

"Why is she unconscious?" Dick asked.

"She wouldn't let us touch her," Raven said, unapologetic. "I thought this would be easier. The spell will wear off soon. We'll be outside when she wakes; we figure you can calm her better."

Dick nodded. "Okay. Yeah, that's probably a good idea. Thanks."

"So what happened?" Beast Boy asked.

"V'aan happened." Dick winced as he sat down in a chair beside the door.

"Did you kick his ass?"

"Mostly," Dick said.

"Then what's that?" Cyborg asked, nodding to Dick's chest. "Lucky hit?"

"You try taking a full strength Tamaranian punch to the chest."

Raven lifted her hands away from Starfire. "Alright, Dick, hold still."

TTTTT

Sitting in the chair beside the bed, Dick watched Starfire sleep, wondering just how aware she was of her surroundings. Whether or not she feigned to avoid talking to him. Raven said soon, but soon just wasn't coming.

"Dick?"

Dick turned his head at the sound of Babs' voice. "Hi." He smiled. "How are you?"

Babs rolled into the room until her chair was on the opposite side of Starfire. "Same old, same old."

Turning her eyes to Starfire, she asked, "How's she doing?"

"I think she's feigning sleep to avoid talking to me."

"I doubt that," Babs said.

"I yelled at her."

"I heard." Babs shook her head. "We all did. You really live up to your name sometimes."

"Thanks." He hadn't seen her in months and she could still make him feel like a naughty child. "You look really good," he said. She did, she had a wonderful healthy glow to her. The definition in her arms, the muscle mass indicating her strength was greatly improved since the last time he saw her.

She just looked at him. "It happened, didn't it?"

Dick frowned. "What happened?"

"I warned you about it, didn't I?"

"I don't know what you're talking about."

Babs shook her head. "Poor Dick, you're always the last to figure these things out."

"Babs, I really don't—"

She squared her shoulders. "I'm dating someone."

Dick's mouth went dry. "What?"

"His name's Jason Bard. He's really very sweet. He runs his own private investigations. I met him a few years ago when he worked for my dad, but we met again a few weeks ago."

"But—"

"We've only been out a couple of times, but I really like him."

"But—"

"So, stop pining for me and focus on what you have."

"Babs—"

"I'll be outside waiting with the others," Babs continued, backing away from the bed so she could roll to the door. "Let us know when she wakes up, there's a lot of worried people out there who are trying to respect Tamaranian boundaries."

Dick stared at her, his head reeling.

He felt strange at her arrival, like he should feel different, his heart should be beating a million miles a moment because of the thought she was dating someone else. But he didn't and it wasn't.

He didn't know what to make of that. Had his initial reaction toward her being hurt which prompted these feelings for her been false? No, because they had cemented in the months which followed and then she'd not spoken to him in months. Wasn't absence supposed to make the heart fonder?

He loved Babs. He did. Why was she doing this?

He got stiffly to his feet to follow her. "You're really dating?"

She turned at the door. "Yes. I wouldn't lie about something like this."

"You said you weren't ready."

She placed her hands on her lap. "I wasn't ready for someone who is having a baby with the girl he's been in love with forever."

"I'm not in love with her!" Dick said hotly.

Babs sighed. "You can deny—" her eyes widened as they shifted away from him.

Dick froze. His hands clenched into fists, then unclenched slowly. Steeling himself, he turned.

Starfire stared at him wide eyed.

"I'll leave you two alone," Babs murmured.

He didn't even notice Babs leaving.

Starfire continued to stare at him.

He stared back. Maybe the ground would open up and consume him. If he was lucky.

"Dick?"

He swallowed and returned to the chair by her side. Brushing his hand through his hair, he rubbed his neck, not wanting to confront the topic of feelings.

Starfire did. "Why did you—"

"Look, it's not like— I mean, I love you, you know I do, but I'm not _in love_ with you. Not in a way which means forever."

She didn't move, she gave no outward appearance that his words affected her, but the light in her eyes faded until they were empty. "I know."

Dick felt terrible.

Starfire pushed herself upright on the bed. She wiggled until her back rested against the headboard. Clasping her hands in her lap, she asked, "Are you going to yell again?"

Dick cringed and reached for her hand. "Star—"

She moved out of his reach, her eyes resolutely staring at her knees.

His hand dropped back to the bed. "I'm not going to yell. I shouldn't have yelled at you to begin with."

Starfire raised her eyebrows at her knees. "I see."

"I was angry," he explained. "I've got four broken ribs. I lashed out in pain. I'm sorry."

It didn't help her. "You accused me of hurting her."

"I'm sorry," he said again and stretched out his hand to rest it on her knee. "I didn't mean it—"

She moved away, curled her knees up toward her chest, although not as tight as she used to curl when she felt vulnerable since her belly got in the way. "I think we should not be spending so much time together."

Dick blinked. "What? Why?"

"I also think that perhaps we should conduct the 'break up' we spoke of. We have done the putting off for too long."

He stared at her. "Don't be like this, Star."

"Like what?"

"Push me away. I know you had a fright, we both did, but we need each other right now."

"You do not _need_ me," she pointed out. "You are only here because you are an honourable man and—"

He narrowed his eyes at her. "You said you needed the contact, that it would help—"

"I overstated my need."

Dick's stomach hit the ground at his feet.

Starfire continued, "As we have progressed I have realised I do not require you as much as I thought. I feel it would be best if we did not crowd each other so much."

"What's this about?" Dick asked, his hands itching to touch her but he knew she'd move away again. She was acting like he'd just committed a great crime. "It's not like you're in love with me. We're doing all this for the baby and she needs _both_ of us."

She stared at him for a moment too long.

He went wide eyed, his body feeling like it was falling too fast and he couldn't find his grip. "Star, you're not—"

Looking away, she asked, "What did Raven say about the baby?"

"Starfire—"

"Is she okay?" she demanded. "Did I hurt her?"

He swallowed. "How'd you know Raven was here?"

"My leg no longer hurts. I assume you contacted her. Do not avoid the question."

"I contacted her and the entire Titan Network and Justice League. They all responded to help locate you."

Starfire blinked several times in rapid succession. "What? Why?"

"Because I asked."

Starfire's face flushed. "Oh."

"Cyborg and Raven said the baby was distressed. Which, I guess is understandable considering the circumstances. You need to rest."

Starfire nodded. "But she is okay?"

"Elevated heart. Lots of movements. But she seems stable."

She wilted in relief. "Thank _X'hal_."

"Both Raven and Cyborg said rest. Alfred's making up a bedroom for you as we speak. We're staying here a couple of days."

She stared at her toes. "I would rather go home."

"Well, that's not happening."

With a scowl, she raised her head. "I am not—"

"Alfred insisted. Take it up with him."

She pursed her lips.

"How did you use your powers anyway?"

Starfire scratched her knee. "I… he was going to kill you. I could not allow that. It just… happened."

She was lying, she had an idea why it happened, she just wasn't willing to share. He had to ask, had to get a straight answer. "Starfire, are you—"

"May I see Raven, please?" she asked, her voice laced with pain she couldn't hide.

He studied her. "Okay," he murmured, his heart heavy. He got to his feet, his arm across his chest. It would be a while before he could move without pain, even with Raven's reduction.

"Dick?" she called when he was at the door.

"Yes?" he asked, hopeful.

"Thank you for saving me."

He smiled. "Anytime."

As he left the room, he wondered why he felt like he'd just committed the biggest mistake in his life.

* * *

**_Author's Note:_**

_Jason Bard… I've screwed with the timelines here. Jason knew Babs before she was paralysed, they were engaged for a time, but she broke it off after she was paralysed by the Joker. They sort of had an on again, off again thing happen for a while, before Babs decided they were better off as professional partners, not romantic ones. Bard always had a candle burning for her._

_Why I included him here. It could be that Babs is lying to Dick. You'll never know for sure. _

_Also, the 'I love you but I'm not in love with you' is paraphrased from the comic where Starfire officially gave up on Nightwing. Basically they were both overcome with lust from one of Raven's brothers, had a booty call, then Starfire flat out asked him if they could ever be together in a way where they didn't have to make excuses anymore and Dick trotted out that he loved her but said no. Starfire went into therapy shortly after and then left Earth for good (and then reboot happened). _


	23. Knock on

**Knock on.**

The first night at the Manor, Starfire had nightmares.

Dick only found out in the morning when Alfred mentioned he'd found Starfire raiding the laundry for Dick's worn clothes. Starfire begged Alfred not to tell him, a secret Alfred found he could not in good conscience keep. So Dick didn't hear it from him.

He was hurt she hadn't sought him out, but he understood why she hadn't. He'd have to fix this, and soon. He wasn't about to let another four week absence occur.

The morning after the attack, Starfire wanted to confront V'aan, against all advisement from him, Bruce, Alfred _and_ Raven. She overrode them all, saying this was a Tamaranian matter and she _must_.

Needless to say, she was heavily flanked.

In a procession, they walked through the halls of Arkham to V'aan's cell, Cyborg, Beast Boy, Raven, Troia, Robin, Batman, Superman and Green Lantern included, passing many of the current inmates on the way. Joker smiled and waved at Batman as they went by his cell, calling that he'll see his old friend soon. Two-Face glowered as he completed physio to restore the leg Starfire had broken. Ivy was completely indifferent to their arrival, although Beast Boy got in trouble from Raven for having a positive reaction to pheromones.

V'aan stood in his cell, a power inhibitor bolted around his neck and dressed in the orange jumpsuit of the inmates. He fumed, paced up and down his cell, long streams of Tamaranian curse (Cyborg pointed that out) erupting from his mouth. The moment he saw Starfire, he charged the bars, rattling them hard. "You have _no_ right, by Earthen laws, I have diplomatic immunity! I am the Grand Ruler of—"

Starfire lifted her chin. "Not anymore. I strip you of the crown."

V'aan bared his teeth. "You have _no_ authority—"

"I defeated you in combat," Starfire snarled. "Do you think they would be pleased to hear that? You, the great General V'aan, defeated by a pregnant female."

"You committed an act of war against Earth by trying to kidnap one of its citizens," Nightwing added. "You were warned about the consequences."

"The Lanterns will not stop any retaliation Earth wishes to conduct," Green Lantern lied.

V'ann looked at all of them. "You would not dare."

"You have two choices," Starfire stated. "One, you can submit to the laws of this planet and be tried for attempted murder and kidnapping and I must warn you, there is mounting evidence and witnesses against you. You will be forced to wear that inhibitor for many, many years."

"Or?"

Starfire placed her hands on the bars so she could face V'aan front on. "Or, you will remain here until my child is born and I will take you back to Tamaran and kill you myself."

Nightwing shifted, uncomfortable with that prospect. He could almost feel the uneasy glances the others did behind his back.

V'aan narrowed his eyes. "You—"

"The death of a thousand cuts," Starfire crooned. "Reserved for traitors, it is a very old Earthen custom I will be willing to use on you. I have heard it is a most… unpleasant way to die." She stuck her hand through the bars and jabbed him in the side. "You have already felt how well I cut."

V'aan staggered back, gulping in pain. He stared at her as if he couldn't believe she would do this.

"Starfire," Nightwing warned.

Starfire glanced at Nightwing and released the bars dramatically, taking a step back. "What say you?" she asked V'aan.

"I will stand trial."

Starfire nodded. "As you wish." She spun on her heel, striding away from the cell.

"I will kill you!" V'aan called after her. "You _sk'aan da kurm._ You will pay—"

"Keep talking," Nightwing said as he turned away. "We'll just add it to the charges."

"Star," Beast Boy asked, scurrying after her. "You wouldn't really kill—"

"I would," she replied. "Never doubt that."

"I'll sharpen her knives," Troia included.

"And I'd pick the nastiest circle of hell to send him to," Raven included.

"Wow," Beast Boy told Cyborg. "Girls are scary."

Nightwing was inclined to agree, but, "Are you going to inform Tamaran he came here?"

Starfire didn't answer.

They returned to the Manor in silence, where they were waylaid by several media personnel. It wasn't a large group, but enough to be a concern.

Dick knew someone had leaked her pregnancy, most likely one of the people she worked with. It would be big news, especially after the dramatic way she was taken. Raven, quick thinking, shifted Donna, Beast Boy, Cyborg and Tim inside the Manor, leaving Starfire, Dick and Bruce in the car. Dick was thankful the darkened windows prevented them being seen.

"How'd these guys get inside the gate?" Bruce muttered.

"It seems I shall have to dismiss the new delivery man," Alfred said, nodding to the truck in the loading bay by the kitchen.

"Call security," Bruce said, eyeing off Starfire and Dick. "I'll field a couple of questions."

Dick opened his mouth. "Do you want us too—"

"Stay in the car." Bruce opened the passenger door without waiting for Alfred, who'd gotten on the phone. Bruce blocked the car door with his body. "Morning, this is an unauthorised—"

Someone shoved a microphone at Bruce. "Is the news of Starfire's pregnancy true?"

Starfire cringed and Dick placed a hand on her knee. "It'll be okay."

She shifted her knees away.

Dick retracted his hand. "Star—"

"Yes, the news of her pregnancy is true," Bruce said. "Yes, the father is my son Dick. Now, if you don't mind, she was attacked yesterday, we'd like to get her inside."

"What does Nightwing have to say about the pregnancy?"

"How should I know?" Bruce said. "Nightwing and Starfire have a professional relationship, it's not like I have anything to do with the guy."

"They dated—"

"And?" Bruce asked. "By my understanding, that was years ago."

"How do you know the baby is Dick's?"

"Are you calling Starfire promiscuous?" Bruce said, sounding angry. "You do realise who you're talking to, don't you? Just how many dating partners have you reported she's had over the last few years?"

"It's a little early in the relationship to be—"

"I'm going to be a grandfather," Bruce said. "And you're hashing on about—"

"I hate this," Starfire whimpered, hugging herself.

"It'll be okay," Dick soothed. "We knew it was coming."

"Are they getting married?"

"Security is on the way," Alfred assured her.

"It was a whirlwind romance," Bruce said, loudly. "I can assure you, they are very much in love and are—"

"Raven," Starfire whispered and closed her eyes.

A hush fell over the crowd of media. Dick looked out through a gap near Bruce's hip, seeing Raven sweeping out of the front door of the Manor, Cyborg, Donna, Beast Boy and _Nightwing_ in tow. Dick knew immediately it was either Tim, or a hologram projection from Cyborg, but it was still a shock to see.

Dick would've loved to know what emotion Raven was throwing at the press to make them part like they did. Raven swooped in, rescued Starfire and swooped off to the Manor again before anyone could blink.

Leaving Dick and Bruce at the mercy of the press.

He deserved that, he supposed. Raven's 'revenge' was usually subtle. Fielding questions and hiding behind Bruce until security arrived was something he was good at.

By the time Dick and Bruce had gotten into the Manor, Starfire, Donna and Raven had headed for the pool for girl time, while Cyborg, Beast Boy and Tim dragged Dick off to the games room. They all shared pizza as the sun set, with Starfire actively avoiding interacting with him as much as she could, before those who didn't live in the Manor were sent home by a stern faced Alfred.

For all her distance and bravado, Starfire had another night of nightmares.

This time, Dick had insisted he spend the night in her room, even if it was on the mattress on the floor. He told her she could either accept it, or he'd sneak in there when she was asleep anyway. She wasn't the only one who could give ultimatums where neither option were favourable. He wasn't about to let her distance herself from him.

She'd fought against it, rather vehemently, but Dick knew when to ask for help. He timed the 'discussion' for the moment Alfred arrived with a mattress for the floor and Starfire just couldn't say no to Alfred.

When her whimpering woke Dick from sleep, he crawled from the mattress on the floor and into bed with her, making sure to wake her up so she knew he was there.

"Dick, no," she murmured, pressing her hands against his shoulders to hold him away from her. "I cannot—"

"You need a good night's sleep," he whispered, sliding under the blankets. He didn't touch her, didn't approach. He got as comfortable on the bed as he could with broken ribs. "And you're not as good of a liar as you think you are. I said this was okay, if it's what you need to help you through the pregnancy, then it's what you need. Don't fight it."

"I have to," she returned.

"No, you don't."

"I do," she insisted, scooting further away.

"Why?"

She didn't answer.

"Look. I know this is hard for you. It's hard for me too. Feelings get all muddled up because we're forced together so much. It's okay to be confused and think—"

"I am not confused." She sounded so sure of herself.

"Then what?"

Another long silence, stretched even longer by the darkness blanketing them.

He tried again. "I'm trying to make things easier."

"You only make it harder."

He stared into the darkness, his eyes finding little comfort in the shadows as he thought.

She'd evaded the 'Tamaranian love is eternal' question when he'd asked her before the pregnancy started. She constantly reinforced that they were friends, nothing more but only ever when they were in the company of friends. It was like she was trying to convince herself. She'd tried to keep him at arm's length, he could see that.

She'd tried and, as he realised, failed.

For all her protests and affirmations her feelings for him were purely platonic and they were only in each other's lives because of their baby, she had lied. All the pushing, all the talk with Babs and how Babs was confused and Starfire knew he wanted to be with Babs, Starfire was trying to do what she thought he wanted, give _him_ the opportunities he wanted, with no care for herself.

She was in love with him.

She was _still_ in love with him.

And that realisation left him staggered.

Confused.

Unsure.

And wondering about his feelings.

Recalling what Bruce had said, Dick pondered on Tamaranian relationships. Obviously, Tamaranians didn't kiss, that was purely for the transfer of information. But they were _very_ big on touch. In private, Dick had been extremely hands-on these past few weeks, without even being truly aware. Hands to her calves as they sat on the couch, taking her hand as they walked. Platonic kisses in greeting or as he left. When he found her in the junk heap, brushing their faces together…

Touch was easy, most of the time he wasn't even aware he was doing it. Touch was an emotional bond which possibly had a greater significance to her, since Tamaranians didn't kiss. If he were on Tamaran, one could assume they were a couple. Hell, on _Earth_ they could be considered one.

No wonder she was hurt by his proclamation. He'd been leading her on.

How could he be leading her on, she knew he wanted to be with Babs. Even though now it seemed to be rather a fruitless want, she'd known, how could he lead her on? Had she hoped, somehow, that he'd fall for her even if she proclaimed to understand what he wanted?

Had this been her plan, perhaps? Getting him to fall for her while she's pregnant and in a situation where she said they needed to be close. No, he'd seen that need firsthand; he knew how much she needed him and how much she hated that need.

It was just so confusing. He didn't know anything anymore.

And now she was trying to keep her distance because he said he wasn't in love with her.

"You think you're using me."

A muffled choke and she moved. He imagined she'd be curling up.

"You're not," he assured her.

"It still feels like I am."

"Use me, Star. Let's go back to the way things were if that makes you feel better."

"I am _never_ going back to that," she snarled. She sat up and the bedside lamp switched on. "You need to leave."

He raised his hand to shield his eyes from the sudden light. "Star—"

"I am willing to believe what you just suggested is as a result of your hurt over Babs' news she is dating combined with the pain of your ribs," she said not looking at him. "You are forgiven. Leave."

"I suggested you need the contact," Dick snapped. "You're only going to hurt yourself and our baby if you don't—"

"I can control myself."

"I don't doubt you can. But wouldn't it make things easier?"

"No, it would not! I will _not_ use or be used for sex!"

He yelped and eased himself up to spare himself the pain from a jarring movement. "Sex?! I didn't mean sex!"

She frowned. "You proposed the friends-with-benefits again, yes?"

"No! I meant snuggling! God, Star, I don't _ever_ want to go back to friends-with-benefits. That ruined us!"

She blinked several times, then burst into tears and hid her face in her hands to sob.

"Oh, Star," he said, shifting until he was beside her. Their knees together, he placed his hand on her back. "It's okay. I'm sorry. I didn't mean—"

"It is so unfair." Her wail was muffled by her hands.

"I know."

"I _hate_ this."

He rested his nose on her shoulder, cuddling into her as much as he could. "I know you do."

"I tried, Dick, really I did, but I cannot help…"

"You're in love with me."

She dropped her hands away long enough for him to see the evidence written all over her face before she looked away.

He rubbed her back. "I'm so sorry, Star, I never meant—"

"It is not your fault I feel this way," she wept, fumbling for the tissues at the bedside table. "It is part of who I am. I cannot… There is no falling _out_."

Dick swallowed, a lead weight settling in his chest. It was too much pressure.

"And you do not help," she wailed. "You with your honour and your kindness and your inescapable need to aid me because I am with your child and I know the touch remains fictitious but I cannot help but _feel_ and I want…" she shook her head. "You touch me and it feels like what we used to be. But it will never be, I want what I cannot have, because even if we do, even if we share, it is not real because I forced you to this point and it cannot be real because I am not your choice."

He didn't know what to say. He wasn't even sure he understood most of what she said. Whenever she rambled like this it was like she could never follow a single thought in a sentence, it was all said so fast it bled together. "Starfire—"

"And even if it _were_ mutual, how could we tell if it was real or it is not simply a side effect of the closeness we are forced to share?"

She raised an interesting point. How _would_ they know if anything was real or not a by-product of the pregnancy? "I—"

"I cannot reconcile what we had with what we were to what we have and are now!"

And he was back to not understanding what she said. "I don't understand."

She shook her head again with more strength this time. "It does not matter. Do the forgetting."

"It _does_ matter. You're upset—"

"My apologies," she said, hiding her face in her hands again. "I do not know what is wrong with me lately."

He was thankful the tears had stopped at least. "Can I blame hormones without getting my head bitten off?"

She heaved in a shuddering sigh which ended in a slightly hysterical laugh. "That seems likely."

"We've been through a lot," he soothed. "It's hard to find a balance."

"I apologise, I should not have said anything."

"Starfire—"

She raised her head and looked at him. "Can we forget that I just had that outburst?"

He studied her with a frown. "I really think we need to—"

"Please? I cannot endure another denial. You have made your own feelings clear. _Please_."

He took the coward's way out. It was better than confronting feelings. Especially since he didn't have a clue as to what they were anymore. He certainly didn't want to cause her any more pain. "Okay."

"Thank you." She blew her nose and dabbed at her eyes, before leaving the wad of used tissues on the bedside table and getting a fresh one. "_X'hal_."

"Are you okay?"

She sighed. "I will be."

He considered her. "Do you remember when we were fifteen and I inhaled that dust from Slade's mask?"

She sniffled. "Yes."

"Do you remember the nightmares I had afterward?"

She nodded.

"Do you also remember who snuck into my bed at night to help me calm down from those?"

Her smile was full of melancholy. "I did."

"You held me until I fell asleep. We weren't dating then."

"No. We were not."

"You held me because you were my friend and you didn't like to see me hurting."

She nodded.

"So, why can't I do that for you?"

She bit her bottom lip, undecided. "Dick…"

"You're my friend. I don't like to see you hurting."

"I… cannot. It would not be right."

"You warned me snuggling would be involved. I'm fine with it."

"I…"

He extended his arm in invitation. "C'mere."

She still hesitated. "It is not fair. For you or for me."

Dick grinned. "I'll tell you what isn't fair. A fifteen-year-old guy, full of teeming adolescent hormones being pressed against his best friend who just happens to be a really hot girl and not being able to do a thing about it. But I'm older and wiser and I promise not to have an unsavoury reaction in the morning."

She considered him with a small smile. "I thought those were uncontrollable."

"They are. But I'll try."

She closed her eyes.

"You need this." He touched her shoulder. Even if it's..." he couldn't bring himself to call it a lie. "It still works. It still helps."

"Dick… I…"

"I'm offering what I can. I know you're hurting because I don't… because of… but I'm trying to give you… something which will help. You _need_ this. You need to relax and feel safe and I can help you with that. And I really don't mind."

She shook her head. "But it is a lie."

"I'm still your friend. That part isn't a lie."

Opening her eyes, she studied him, and then swallowed. "Lie down." She gestured toward his side of the bed. "And face that way." She flinched. "If your ribs can handle that."

He raised his eyebrows. "They can, but that won't help—"

"If I am to do this, I will do this with the least emotional impact for both of us. Lie down."

Confused, he did was he was told, facing away from her. He propped a pillow against his chest to relieve some of the weight against his ribs.

"Are you comfortable?"

"I still don't see how—"

The light went out. Starfire muttered something in Tamaranian, the bed bouncing as she shifted and Dick felt her knee knock against the back of his as she located him. She eased toward him, belly bump against the small of his back, her arm sliding beneath his so her hand could stretch across his upper torso and her nose against his neck.

"Your nose is cold," he said, trying to relieve some of the tension he could feel in her.

She snorted, puffs of breath down his back.

He placed his hand over hers on his chest. "If you tell anyone I'm the little spoon, I'll deny it."

She pressed her face to his shoulder. "Does it matter?"

"No. I guess not… Star?"

"Yes?"

"I don't want to do the press break up."

A resigned noise. "Dick—"

"Not yet. Not on the back of this. I think it'll be strange. Let's just wait."

"What benefit would there be to delay—"

"We could see how they report the abduction and pregnancy announcement. Wait until after Beast Boy and Raven's wedding. Then we'll tackle it."

She sighed. "Very well."

He twisted his head toward her. "Really? I thought you would take more convincing."

She changed the subject with very little finesse. "What do you think Azarath will be like?"

"Um… what? When are we going to Azarath?"

"For Raven and Beast Boy's wedding."

"It's in Azarath?"

"It was on the invite."

"Oh. Well, you know me, socially awkward that I am I never read the invite. Wait… Am I going to have to wear a robe?"

"I believe so."

"Oh, god."

"I believe the saying is 'you have the legs to pull off a robe', yes?"

Dick laughed. "Thanks."

"Do you think there will be dancing?"

"There's always dancing at a wedding," Dick said. "Dancing and food and alcohol, even Azarathian ones. Cyborg won't be coming if there isn't."

"True," she murmured.

"No drinking for you," he warned, being playful.

"I know," she replied and he could hear the smile in her voice. "But I get to dance, yes?"

"All you like. As long as you put your feet up once in a while."

"Will you dance with me?" she asked, timid.

"If you like."

She snuggled against his back. "I would like."

Dick smiled into the darkness. This was the way he liked things with Starfire, easy, comfortable, friendly. With snuggles. Switching moods rapidly like this was new, but he put it down to anxiety and hormones.

"May I ask how you are feeling regarding Babs?"

He grunted at her.

"My apologies, I did not mean to upset you."

"I'm not upset," he replied. "I just… I don't know how I feel." He sighed. "It's a really odd situation."

"I know."

"It's…"

"Unique."

"Yes. Very. Not to mention… no… I probably shouldn't say that."

"Say what?" Starfire asked.

"Nuh-ah. I have foot-in-mouth disease lately." No, she really didn't need to hear he was lying here, spooning with her and not thinking about Babs at all. Not until she mentioned Babs at least. Now… he didn't feel guilty. What was up with that?

"Oh."

"I suppose I should have expected it," he admitted. "We're all so stubborn."

"I am sorry," she murmured. "I hoped you would sort through things."

He stroked her fingers. "I know. Me too."

Readjusting her face against his back, she wriggled, then breathed in deeply.

He tucked his feet against her shins and grinned as he felt the baby kicking at his back. "Hello, beautiful."

"Hmm?" Starfire asked, sounding sleepy.

"Baby. She's kicking."

She made a small noise of contentment. "Pleasant _snorvlaks_."

"Night, Star." He chuckled. "That's a pretty cool name."

"What?"

"Nightstar. It's a combination of both our names."

"It has a good sound."

"It does."

Starfire pushed her face against his shoulder. "We are not calling her that."

Dick laughed. "Aww."

"It would be a good superhero name. But I was thinking something simpler would suit."

"Like what?"

"Galfora."

Dick choked. "Ummmm," he said, drawing out the 'm' as long as he could. "Can I say no without you biting me?"

Starfire giggled and squeezed him. "Do you not like it? We may call her Gally as the nickname."

"You're teasing me, right?"

"Perhaps."

Releasing her hand, he reached back so he could place it against her stomach. "I don't think she's a Galfora. That name inspires a big, bulky, hairy sort of man with a heart of gold."

"Hmm. Perhaps you are correct."

"What about… um… hmm… this is tougher than I thought."

"We still have plenty of time to contemplate," Starfire replied. "Go to sleep."

"Is this helping? Being close like this?"

"Are you going to talk all night?" she murmured and yawned into his back.

"No. Sorry. Night."

He stayed awake long after Starfire fell asleep, staring into the darkness and feeling their baby move, his mind churning with so many thoughts. How she felt. How he felt. What he was going to do about that.

But he did know one thing. He'd need to pull back his physical contact and let her call the shots in that respect.

If he could.


	24. Til Death

**Til Death**.

"-Do us part, 'til death do us part... You know, that's a pretty ridiculous thing when you consider who I'm marrying. I'm glad she scrapped it."

"What're you saying instead?" Cyborg asked.

"'Til we meet again," Beast Boy said, grinning at his reflection in the mirror.

"Nice," Nightwing said, readjusting his mask.

"I thought it fitted, considering," Beast Boy said. "She always jokes that when we die, she's going to drag my ass down to hell and we can rule together."

"Raven joking? That'd be the day," Cyborg said.

Beast Boy grinned. "I've been practicing my evil laugh just for the occasion."

"Beast Boy, king of hell. Nice ring to that," Nightwing said.

"You know, I never actually expected y'all would make the wedding," Cyborg said.

Beast Boy's ears dropped. "What?"

"Yeah, the bet was you guys would elope well before now," Nightwing included.

"Seriously?" Beast Boy asked, aghast. "So… who won the bet?"

"I did," Nightwing grinned. "I knew you'd make it."

Beast Boy's face was a combination of a grin and a scowl. "Shame on you Cy, for not believing in me."

"Hey, I thought Raven would be the one to break," Cyborg protested.

"She nearly did," Beast Boy said, sheepish. "But I managed to convince her to wait."

"Dang it," Cyborg said, snapping his fingers.

"Arella can't come back to Earth, if Raven eloped her mother would never be able to be there. That was the decider." He stuck his tongue out of the corner of his mouth as he fumbled with his tie. "Bunny ears, bunny ears, playing by a tree. Criss-crossed the tree, trying to catch me—"

"B, that's how you tie your shoes, not a bow tie," Cyborg said.

"Well, how do you do it then?"

Cyborg looked at Nightwing, who raised his eyebrow. "Neither of you know?"

"Not in my program," Cyborg dismissed.

Nightwing snorted, then stood. "Front and centre, both of you."

They both trundled over to him, offering up their necks.

"Why do we have to wear ties anyway?" Cyborg muttered, twitching as Nightwing did his tie. "Aren't we wearing robes?"

"Hold still," Nightwing muttered.

"Dude, it's tight."

"Deal."

"Just for the ceremony," Beast Boy said, answering Cyborg's question. "After party is formal wear, so we get the best of both worlds."

"So, Raven's in a sexy white dress under her clothes?" Cyborg asked, leering at the changeling.

"I wouldn't know." Beast Boy shrugged. "She wouldn't tell me. I'm gonna imagine she's naked under them."

Nightwing and Cyborg looked at each other. "Now, that's an image I didn't want," Nightwing muttered, moving onto Beast Boy's tie.

"Hey, my lady's hot. I'm allowed to think so."

A knock on the door and the three of them turned their heads.

"Hello? Gar?" a feminine voice murmured.

"It's Rita," Beast Boy said, brightening.

Nightwing finished tying Beast Boy's tie as Cyborg opened the door for Elasti-Girl and Mento.

Elasti-Girl rushed in to hug Beast Boy, tearful and proud while Mento lingered by the door. "Oh, Gar, you look incredible, look Steve, our little man is all grown up and getting married."

Beast Boy spluttered, embarrassed at the attention.

"I gotta go do my duty with Raven," Nightwing told Cyborg while Beast Boy was getting manhandled, picking up the box with his robe in it. "See you guys at the altar."

Cyborg grinned and nodded.

Carrying the box under his arm, Nightwing wandered down the hallway of the Azarath Tower to find where the bride would be getting ready. He peeked his head into the temple, nodded to Flash, who was an usher for the day, making sure everyone got to their seats.

The columned temple was sparsely decorated, it didn't need to be since this was an Azarathian wedding and the place already looked temply enough. Incense burned in the corner, a small podium at the front and the priest of Azar waiting in the wings. Nightwing could see many of the Titans in the pews, all wearing the Azarathian robes they'd been provided with, so it was a sea of blue hoods.

"Nearly full," Flash said, zipping up to the door. "Herald's rounding up the stragglers."

Nightwing nodded. "I'm on my way to see Raven and check how she's doing. Beast Boy won't be long. Try not to eat all your snacks before the service, Wal."

"I'm hurt you would think so little of me," he said, grinning.

Nightwing grinned. "See you soon."

"Sure thing, father of the bride."

Nightwing waggled a finger at him. "I can still kick your ass."

"Likewise."

Nightwing saluted him with a grin and headed off again. Knocking on the wooden door where Raven was getting ready, he readjusted his tie.

"Yes?" she called.

"It's me."

The door was covered in black energy and opened, allowing Nightwing inside. He discovered both Starfire and Raven, sitting opposite each other, completely dressed in their robes with their hair and make-up already perfect, sharing a cup of tea.

"Umm…"

Raven raised her eyebrow. "What?"

"You're ready?"

"And?" she asked while Starfire giggled. Lifting a spare cup and saucer she asked, "Cup of herbal tea?"

He shrugged. "Sure," he said and sat down on the couch next to Starfire. "Hi."

"Greetings," she replied with a bright smile. "You look most handsome."

He tugged at his suit. "Still need to put the robe on though."

"You'd better do that while I make the tea," Raven said.

He sighed. "Do I have to?"

Starfire giggled and placed her cup of tea on the small table beside her. "I shall help you."

He groaned, moving his feet out of the way as Starfire headed for the box. "I really look ridiculous in a robe."

"We won't know until you wear it," Raven said.

Starfire lifted the skirt of the robe, holding it open so he could slip his head and arms through. He struggled into it, feeling the weight of the robe settle against his shoulders.

"Yup, you look ridiculous," Raven said.

Nightwing poked his tongue out at her.

"It needs to be unwrinkled," Starfire said, smoothing out the wrinkles with her palms. She brushed her hands over his shoulder and across the front of his chest to help the robe sit better. "All done."

He smiled, resisting the urge to catch her hand to hold. Keeping his distance turned out harder than he expected, as much as she seemed to appreciate it. "Thanks. So, what are you wearing under that?"

She arched an eyebrow, her hands resting on his chest. "Why?"

"Beast Boy's convinced Raven's going to be naked under her robes."

"I am," Raven said.

Nightwing twisted and gaped. "You are?"

"Yes, of course," she said, floating his cup of tea to him. "After the ceremony, we'll preform the ritual of fertility, witnessed and blessed by everyone in the room."

Nightwing choked.

Starfire giggled. "She is joking."

He sagged. "Oh, wow. Thanks Raven, I needed that. Do you have any brain acid?"

With a small smile, Raven sipped her tea.

"Was Beast Boy almost ready?" Starfire asked.

"Rita waylaid him, but yeah."

"Then I shall be right back," she said, releasing Nightwing to head into the small bathroom attached to the room.

"Baby on bladder?" Nightwing asked, sitting opposite Raven.

Raven nodded. "All day, apparently."

"Poor thing. So, how are you? Nervous?"

"Do you really think I'd be sitting here drinking herbal tea if I wasn't?" she replied.

"I have no idea," Nightwing responded and sipped at his tea.

"I don't blame Star for having to dart off to pee," Raven said. "We've drunk four pots this afternoon."

"Wow."

Raven sighed.

"You'll be fine," Nightwing said, stretching across to place his hand on her knee. "You love each other, that's all you need."

Raven raised an eyebrow at that but she didn't say anything.

"There's really no fertility rite, is there?"

Raven laughed, then turned her eyes to the door. "Come in, mother."

Arella glided into the room. "We are ready. Your groom awaits."

Raven nodded and put her cup down and Nightwing placed his cup beside hers. She rose to her feet and brushed off her robe with her hands. "We're waiting on Starfire," Raven said. "Then we'll be ready."

It was a simple ceremony. Nightwing walked Raven down the aisle, a few Azarathian chants, Raven and Beast Boy's hands bound together with a long bit of ribbon, vows which were written by both of them to reflect their heritages (not that Nightwing had ever heard the words 'purr' and 'scratch' in vows before) and topped off by a dipped, long and rather loving kiss which made Nightwing nervous Raven had been lying about lying about fertility rites.

As everyone filed from the temple, one of the monks collected all the ceremonial blue robes and Nightwing was glad to be rid of his. He had the privilege of escorting Arella to the hall for the Earth-style wedding celebration, so he gallantly offered her his arm, following after Mento and Elasti-Girl as they followed the crowd. Raven, Beast Boy, Cyborg and Starfire (and Donna who was busily snapping photos) would join them soon, once the forms had been signed.

He didn't mind about the exclusion for that, he still got to sit at the wedding table with the rest of the people he considered family.

Everyone crowded into the decorated dining hall, lingering around the double doors with their small bags of rice and confetti to throw at the happy couple when they arrived. It was a good group of people, Titans and Doom Patrol. Nightwing could see Flash and the twins already eyeing off the food. Bumblebee look wonderful her yellow evening gown as she waited for her boyfriend, she had a place at the wedding table too, just so she could sit with Cyborg. Argent, Kole and Jinx chatted to each other, as did Speedy and Aqualad. Robotman and Negative man were having discussions about 'Clive's special home brew' he'd brought with him from Earth.

Donna came in, positioning herself at the front of the group so she could get the best shots. "Here they come," she warned with a grin, getting a couple of photos of the assembled group.

The doors swung open, Cyborg and Starfire darting through so they wouldn't get hit by the barrage of things being thrown. They reached Nightwing's side, both of them giggling, and ready to throw their own satchels.

Then it was a general frenzy to bombard the bride and groom with cries of 'Congratulations!', 'Well done,' 'Happy bonding ceremony' and '_Kitizle snoflarg_!'.

Nightwing thought Raven looked gorgeous in her dark blue wedding dress, the hem of the v neck and along to her shoulders was dotted with hundreds of blue gems of various sizes, lined with silver embroidery. It really suited her and reminded him a lot of her uniform in dress form with a bit more bling.

Nightwing turned to Starfire to compliment Raven's dress choice and his mouth dropped as he caught a good look at her. A pale lavender evening dress, it had a beaded belt band beneath her breasts before the flowing skirt elegantly enhanced her baby bump.

"What is wrong?" she asked, noticing.

"You look beautiful."

She flushed, her hand slipping into his. "Thank you."

Large metallic arms enveloped them both from behind, Cyborg holding them both to his chest. "Look at them," he said and the three of them watched as Beast Boy indulged in another kiss with his new wife and the rest of their friends showered them with rice and confetti. Cyborg sniffled. "I'm so proud."

"As am I," Starfire murmured. The group of revellers and rice throwers broke up, people heading to the bar while others went to congratulate the happy couple.

Bumblebee ran her hand along Cyborg's shoulder. "Can anyone get in this hug?"

Cyborg pressed a smacking kiss to her check and squished Starfire against Nightwing so he could get his arm around Bumblebee. "Hey baby, love the dress. Very sexy."

She preened. "Thanks, Sparky."

"Ahh, Cyborg," Starfire murmured. "Ow?"

He released her immediately. "Sorry, fly girl. You okay?"

"Yes," she said, her hands on her belly. "I am fine."

Nightwing rested one hand on her back, the other rubbed her belly. "You should sit down," he said, concerned.

She gave him a sour look. "The night has barely begun and you are already nagging."

Nightwing chuckled and shook his head. "Okay, no nagging," he promised. "Can I get you a drink?"

She smiled. "Perhaps later."

"Too much tea?"

"Yes."

He smiled and patted her belly. "How about something to eat?"

She wagged her finger at him. "Nagging."

Removing both his hands, he lifted them in supplication. "Sorry."

"Add the 'dear' in," Bumblebee said to Cyborg. "And they're an old married couple."

"Shh," Cyborg murmured and pulled Bumblebee away. "We don't talk about Nightwing and Star."

"Is that like fight club?" she asked, smirking, then put on a deep voice. "First rule of the Titans, we don't talk about Nightwing and Star."

Nightwing frowned as they walked away, but his attention was diverted by the kick against his hand. "Wow, that was strong."

"She can feel my excitement," Starfire said.

He rubbed her where the kick had come from. "Does it hurt?"

"No."

"Not even with alien strength?"

Starfire rested her hand over Nightwing's. "No, the energy protects."

"That's handy," he said and smiled at her.

Flash jumped on Nightwing, his hands gripping Nightwing's shoulders as he shook him. "Drrrriiiiinks. C'mon dude."

With an apologetic smile at Starfire, Nightwing let Flash drag him away.

There were toasts, dinner, more toasts, Raven and Beast Boy acting all gooey toward each other and linking arms to share their drinks, or sneak in kisses which Nightwing thought they completely deserved to have. Raven was never normally very affectionate, in public at least, but Nightwing knew if she had to be openly affectionate for one day in her life, her wedding day was a pretty good day to choose. Besides, it wasn't like she was openly grinning and laughing, she just had this air of quiet happiness which seeped through everyone at the wedding party.

Watching them dance their first dance as husband and wife, watching Raven's hands glide on Beast Boy's chest, or seeing Beast Boy whisper in her ear before dropping a kiss against her shoulder while he hugged her and shuffled from side to side, made Nightwing envious.

Starfire, her usual social butterfly self, flitted around the guests and friends, talking and laughing and allowing them to feel her baby move. She was in high spirits today, a change from the more sombre mood she'd had since V'aan attacked.

It was a little hard for him to imagine they only had less than thirteen weeks left before they'd meet their baby. Before he could hold her and know her better than just a moving bump which responded to his voice and touch.

Nightwing blundered his way through the 'father of the bride' speech, Cyborg aced his best man speech. Arella gave a few words in blessing. The Titan girls, sans Raven, sang together and managed not to completely destroy the song in the process. Mentos gave a speech, much to Beast Boy's surprise.

Robotman and Cyborg had a shotting session with Robotman's special home brew, which consisted of something Nightwing was pretty sure was some form of alcoholic motor oil. Potent stuff, if the look on Cyborg's face was anything to go by and the smell had the rest of the menfolk steering clear. Nightwing thought Cyborg's constitution was a lot better than Robotman's, in terms of being able to process the special home brew, because Robotman listed and started to sing and dance on table tops a long time before Cyborg started to.

Negative man enjoyed talking to several monks of Azar in attendance. Jericho played guitar in the corner for anyone who wanted to listen. Flash and Jinx got jiggy on the dance floor, making everyone laugh. Most of the girls danced in groups when they weren't dancing with a partner.

Nightwing was dragged onto the dance floor more than once, once by Raven, once by Starfire, more often by Donna and at least once by every other female Titan in attendance. He was a little sad Starfire hadn't invited him to dance more.

It was Bumblebee who brought the flowers out, insisting on the tradition of the bouquet toss. Raven hadn't had a bouquet, she hadn't needed it and didn't like flowers as it was, so Bumblebee brought her own. "You have to," she proclaimed. "It's tradition."

"It's a pointless one," Raven said. "I don't like the idea a simple bunch of flowers get to decide your fate."

"Just like a prophecy never decided yours," Beast Boy said, his arm around Raven.

"You're next you realise," Cyborg said. "Garter."

"Not wearing one," Raven said.

Cyborg held up a black, frilly one. "Gotcha covered. We figured we'd much rather see Gar put it on with his teeth than take it off. Human teeth," he continued, stopping Beast Boy's grin before it could begin. "Not anything else."

"Oh, man!"

Raven sighed dramatically. "Very well. I just throw this?" She lifted the bouquet in her hand.

"Wait! We gotta assemble the unmarried girls first!" Bumblebee said, looking around as the girls gathered around her. She gestured. "C'mon Star!"

Starfire laughed from her place at the wedding table where she was resting. "Oh, no. I do not feel the up to wrestling over the flowers today."

Nightwing was glad she said that, because he would have stepped in to veto the idea and been accused of nagging.

"Aww," Bumblebee said, pouting.

"You realise, that bouquet is mine," Jinx said, readying herself to jump.

"You wish," Bumblebee said. "You're bad luck, you'll—"

"Exactly," Jinx said, her eyes on the prize.

Beside Nightwing, Flash began to sweat. "Oh, shit."

"I guess you're doomed," Nightwing joked.

"I'm out," Argent said, holding her hands up and backing away slowly. "I don't want to go up against either of them."

"Looks like your safe," Speedy told Hotspot, who gave a relieved sort of grin.

"You're just lucky Pantha's not here," Bumblebee said as she bumped shoulders with Jinx, trying to push her out of the way. "She'd squash us both."

"Pantha's _married_," Jinx reminded her.

"Do you think she cares?"

"Can I go?" Raven asked, waiting on their argument, the bouquet held ready to throw.

"Yes!" both Jinx and Bumblebee chorused.

Raven shrugged and threw the bouquet. A flash of pink, and angry buzzing and Jinx walked away the victor, grinning broadly.

"Cheater!"

Nightwing shook Flash's shoulder. "Poor you."

Flash gulped. "Um…"

Cyborg waved the garter. "Our turn!"

"How are we gonna catch that if Beast Boy has to put it on first?" Speedy asked.

Beast Boy looked at the garter in trepidation. "I really gotta use—"

Raven's eyes lit up, the garter shooting from Cyborg's hand and up her leg to rest on her thigh.

"Aww, what?" Cyborg complained.

"You have _seen_ his teeth, right?" Raven asked, dropping her skirts. "I'm not one for silly traditions."

Beast Boy gave her a woeful look. "But, babe—"

Raven placed her hand on Beast Boy's cheek. "You can remove it later."

"With my teeth?" he asked, hopeful.

She smiled. "If you like."

"Too much info!" Cyborg complained immediately, throwing up his arms. "Now what are we going to do?"

Robotman jumped on a table and waved his arms in excitement. "Who's for Karaoke?!"

The bar was open, so through the night, people gradually became drunker and more rowdy on Azarathian wine. Nightwing made sure not to drink too much, he tended to get mouthy when he was and the last thing he wanted to do was blurt out something he didn't mean again. Plus, it didn't seem fair for Starfire, who wasn't drinking at all because they couldn't tell what alcohol would do to the baby.

Towards the end of the night —when couples were slow dancing and Beast Boy's hands had begun to roam toward more private places on Raven's anatomy to the extent they were going to be leaving soon— Starfire stood in the middle of the dancing floor, her hands on her belly, one on the top, the other curled beneath. Her eyes closed as she swayed to the music, just feeling the rhythm and the music and her child. Nightwing watched her, sitting at the wedding table with his feet up. She looked breathtakingly beautiful right now. Totally at peace and happy.

"Why are you sittin' o'vr here?" Cyborg asked, taking the seat beside him. His words were only slightly slurred now, he must have sobered up a little. Or at least enough so that he hadn't fallen asleep in the corner.

"No reason."

"You could be dancin' over there. With Ssstar."

"I know."

"Instead of being all stalker panty man."

Nightwing turned his head. "Stalker panty man? How much have you had to drink?"

"Bee's words, not mine. But sera-seriousss-ly dude. Get your act t'gether and jus' tell her how you feel."

Nightwing sighed. "It's not that easy."

"It is. I mean, look at BB and Rae, all dancing up ons each other and married. You could be that happy too, if yous just let yourself."

Nightwing turned his gaze to Raven and Beast Boy, who were canooddlin' on the dance floor near Starfire, talking to each other and smiling.

"Dick, lemme be frank."

"Okay, Frank."

Cyborg scoffed then grew serious. "That girl, she's been head o'vr heels for you for years. We all knowed. The Tower was so sad, so so sad, after you left fer Gotham. But she picked herself up, she moved on, she got on with her life so you could get on with yours and not worry 'bout her. She's put everyone else's needs before her own, _your_ needs," Cyborg poked Nightwing in the chest, "time and time again. She held onto that bubsie, she hid from all ov us, until you were in a place where you'd be ready. Galfore's death ssscrewed with that, but she still tried. Doncha think it's time someone else put her needs first? She needs you. Stop makin' her wait."

"Right. Thanks, Cy, that just about cleared up all the problems I had. I'll just go over there and kiss her senseless because of your prep-talk," Nightwing said with a scowl. "Like I said, it's not that easy."

"Make it easy," Cyborg said. "Try going over there and dancin'."

Nightwing sighed. "I already told her I wasn't in love with her."

"Then you're a liar."

Nightwing looked at Cyborg, eyebrows raised at the anger in his voice. "I know."

"And you're a fucktard for tellin' her that. Seriously, Dick, you've done some shitty things, but that… that just… man, I'm so done with you." Cyborg threw up his hands and got up. "You don't deserve her."

"No," Nightwing murmured and drank the rest of his wine. "I know that, too."

Donna thumped down beside him a short time later, camera in hand. "Hey."

Nightwing pulled himself out of his trying-not-to-stare-at-Starfire-and-failing stupor. "Hi."

"Enjoying yourself?"

"Yep. Great night. You?"

"My feet are starting to hurt." She kicked off her shoes and put her feet up on the table beside his.

He laughed. "Then why are you wearing such high shoes?"

"Paying the price for vanity."

"You could just float."

"I'm not Starfire, I don't live and breathe flight. For me, it's a tool which turns me into a weapon."

Nightwing shrugged. "And I suppose big sis would get you in trouble if you just started floating around everywhere."

Donna laughed. "Something like that. Do you wanna dance?" she asked, nodding to the dance floor.

Nightwing watched Cyborg drag Bumblebee out for a dance, being very hands on with her. "I thought you had sore feet."

She wriggled painted toes. "I can dance barefoot."

"I think I'm done for the night. Just waiting on the happy couple to stop groping each other in public and take it to their bedroom."

Donna laughed. "How long do you think that will be?"

"Soon, I hope. Star's looking tired but I know she won't let me take her back to her room for sleep until Raven leaves."

Donna nodded. "Got some choice photos tonight. Wanna see?"

He laughed. "I do know what happened here tonight, I don't need to see them right now, thanks."

"There's one here of you and Star I think you should see. I'm going to send you a print."

Nightwing raised his eyebrows. "Fine."

She clicked open the digital display on her camera, flicking through the photos until she got to the one she wanted. The one of him, with his hands on Starfire's belly, her hand over his and them smiling at each other. Just smiling, as if they were the only two people in the world. The way he looked at her…

He stared at it, then back up at the dancing Starfire. "Excuse me, Donna," he murmured. He walked with purposeful step toward Starfire. He wasn't going to let himself think. Not anymore. He'd done too much of that. It was time for other things.

Reaching her, he paused within her personal space, not touching her. "Hi."

Starfire's eyes fluttered open and she smiled at him. "Greetings."

"Do you want to dance?"

Lifting her hands from her belly, she rested her elbows on his shoulders as an answer. He placed his hands on the back of her hips, pulling her closer until baby brushed against him. They swayed together, their feet barely moving as Nightwing brought their bodies together as close as he dared. Walking cuddles, they were the best sort of dances, especially since he could stare into her eyes.

When she had them open, that is, since she closed them after they began to sway together.

"You are beautiful," he murmured, trying to prompt her to look at him.

"You told me that earlier," she replied.

His hands slipped up from her hips to her shoulders, his thumbs along the side of her ribs. "It's still true." He rested his forehead against hers. "You never stopped being beautiful to me."

Her eyes flashed open. "What?"

He swallowed. "I think I was wrong before."

Her head reared back and she pulled her arms away from his neck. "I am not doing that again with you."

"Just hear me out," he pleaded.

Her hands on his chest pushed. "Do not ruin tonight."

He wouldn't let her push him away, not this time. "There are so many times I didn't fight for you and I should've. I wanted—"

There were tears in her eyes. "Not now—"

"I wanted _you_. Your every day. Your wakeful and your sleeping moments and everything in between. I still—"

"It is not real," she told him and one of the tears spilled over. "It is not. It is alcohol and melancholy talking. Tomorrow you will regret. Do not do this to me. _Please_—"

"And with that!" Beast Boy announced in a loud voice. "I think my wife and I will bid you all adieu!"

Starfire pulled away and began to clap, struggling to maintain a wavering smile. Nightwing turned his head, distracted, as Beast Boy scooped Raven up to carry her.

People catcalled, whistled and cheered as the black portal opened up beside Raven. Beast Boy kissed her and kept on kissing her as he carted her across the threshold and into the darkness beyond.

When Nightwing turned back, Starfire had gone.

* * *

_**Author's Note:**_

_Cyborg is 100% done with Nightwing's shit. _


	25. Follow

**_Author's Note:_**

_It's that time again. If you haven't read A Crime of Passion by Sir Alwick, then you should. He is a master of words, his battles are incredibly detailed and I really wish I had his sense of poetry. His last chapter had me hanging my head in shame for my prissy little V'aan battle earlier. His story is an M for one or two reasons, but it's nothing to detailed and can be skipped. Really, you are missing out if you haven't read it._

_Skylar: Comic canon, the Titans know who Nightwing is. Strictly speaking, Nightwing's identity is like the worst kept secrets out there, most superheros know. They'd also know about the baby. The Doom Patrol could probably figure it out, if they thought about it but I don't see any of them reading gossip magazines (except maybe Rita). The Monks of Azar do not and, since they don't go to Earth, probably don't care, but since Raven talked about her team, Nightwing (Robin) included, she thought it was better Nightwing walked her down the aisle. Since the other Titans were going in their superhero personas (ie Flash, Speedy, Herald all wore masks), Nightwing thought it best to wear his mask too. But he really wasn't that affectionate toward Starfire, beside the belly rub and as I mentioned a lot of people did that over the course of the night, so I don't see a problem with him going as Nightwing.  
_

* * *

**Follow**

Dick rapped on the door. "Starfire?" He waited a full minute before he tried again. "Star, I know you're in there."

"Go away." Her voice sounded muffled and a distance from the door. Dick guessed she was probably face first in her pillow. They all had guest rooms in the Azarathian Tower for the night, Raven preferred people didn't pass out to sleep in the hallways or the banquet room.

He rested his head on the door, looking down at his feet. "I can't. I need to—"

"Please."

"Star, I need to talk to you."

"I do not wish to speak to you." A louder voice now, the muffled sound was gone.

"I look ridiculous standing outside your door."

"Then go back to your room," she told him, her voice moving around inside the room.

"Not until I said what I came to say."

"Then you shall be waiting a long time."

"I'll say it through the door if I have to."

"I am tired. We should do this in the morning when you are not inebriated."

"I'm not drunk. Not even close, I wanted to keep a level head tonight. I know—"

"I do not think it wise to—"

"Fuck being wise," Dick snapped and jiggled the door handle. "Let me in."

"No."

Dick sighed. "Please."

She didn't answer.

Resting his forehead against the door again, he sighed. "I didn't do it in the past and I'm always going to regret that. This time, I'm going to fight for you. For us."

Stony silence.

"I know you think it's a by-product of the baby. That we're being forced together and they aren't real. But I know they _are_ real because I never stopped—"

Something hit the door. Probably Starfire by how close she sounded. "Do not," she snarled through. "Do not _ruin_ tonight any more than you have. Go away _now_."

"Starfire—"

"Do not do this to me!" she cried and the door thumped. "Not now!"

"Then let me in."

A ragged sob. "In the morning."

"Star—"

"In the morning, you may say whatever you wish to say. And I will listen. Not until then."

"I want—"

"Goodnight, Dick," she said and he heard her moving away.

Dick sighed. He thumped his head against the door, then turned around to slide his back all the way to the ground. He rested his head back to stare at the roof and sat there.

He could break in, he supposed. He could pick the lock and enter on his own but it would be a breach of trust. A huge break and he didn't think he could come back from that. He could come back in the morning, but he thought it would give Starfire too much time. And himself too. He wanted to act, wanted to tell her so they could move on, move past, get on with their lives. Whether that was together or not, he just wanted her to hear the words from him.

Five minutes past before he heard any form of noise from Starfire's room. Bathroom door, by the sounds. Then, "You are still out there."

"Yup."

A pause. "Why?"

"I want to talk to you."

Another pause. "Can it not wait?"

"No, I don't think it can."

"I wish to sleep."

"Do you really think you can?" he asked. "Knowing I'm camping outside your door?"

"Dick—"

"Five minutes. Just give me five minutes."

"I do not—"

"I'll sing. Grand old duke of York. I'll stay out here and sing all night until you talk to me."

She fell silent.

"_Grand old Duke of York, he had ten thousand men, he marched them up to the top of the hill and he marched then down again. And when they were up_—"

"Dick? What are you doing?"

Dick looked over to see Speedy coming down the hallway. "Serenading Starfire."

Speedy raised an eyebrow at him, then peeled off his mask as he unlocked the door of the room he was staying in. "With Grand old Duke of York?"

Dick grinned. "Yup."

"Right. Well… keep it down then, would you?"

"Nope. Gotta keep singing until she lets me in."

Roy screwed up his face. "Pick a better song then."

"Any suggestions?" Dick asked.

"Fuck if I know," Roy rolled his eyes. "Try Teenage Dream."

Dick laughed. "Katy Perry fan, are we?" He bashed the back of his head against the door in a knock. "Whaddya reckon, Star. Wanna see me in skin-tight jeans?" He took a deep breath. "_You think I'm pretty without any makeup on—_"

"Jesus, Dick," Roy complained. "Be in tune at least."

"_You think I'm funny when I tell the punch line wrong_—"

The handle of her door rattled as it was unlocked.

"Guess that's a yes," Dick said, triumphant as he bounded to his feet. "Night Roy."

Starfire stood so the bed was between her and the door, effectively preventing him from going straight for her. "You have five minutes," she told him sternly. "Then I expect you to leave."

"If that's what you want," he said, studying her.

She wouldn't look at him, not directly, her gaze fixed on the painting on the wall to his left. Stiff backed, stiff everything, she looked set to bolt at any moment.

He thrust his hands into his pockets and planted his feet. She'd have to get by him to get to the door. The only other way she could go was the bathroom. "I get why you're scared. I am too."

"Why could you not wait until morning?" she scolded.

"Because we've already wasted so much time and I don't want to—"

"I am not a second choice because you cannot have Babs!"

"You're not second anything. I never fell out of love with you either!"

Her hands balled into fists. "You are a liar!"

"Yes, I am," he said. "I lied to Babs when I said I didn't love you, I allowed you to believe a lie all because I didn't want to face the truth."

"You want to be with her, not—"

"I wanted to be with you _first_," he told her. "I tried! At Fashion Week, I asked if we could talk but you said some things couldn't be fixed! I wanted to respect your decision. And then Babs got hurt and… I thought I was going to lose her. Feelings got muddled—"

"Do not deny that you love her," she snarled.

"I _do_ love her," Dick said. "But we never had a real chance to be anything more. She tried to tell me, she _knew_, Star, she told me this would happen, that I'm still in love with—"

"Stop it. Just stop it." She paced in a tight circle. "I cannot let you do this to me again."

"Do what?"

"Hurt me." She shook her head. "I cannot."

"It's never been my intent to hurt you."

She threw him a glare. "And yet you do. Again and again and I will not do this with you again." She shook her finger at him, taking a step forward. "You told me, you said you wanted to be with her. I respected that. What am I supposed to do with this now? Accept with open arms? Rush over and kiss you and gush this is what I always wanted? Jump back into a relationship? Become the happy family?"

He was taken aback. "I…"

Her eyes widened and she took a step back. "You _do_ expect that!"

"I thought that was what you wanted! You love me!"

She flinched, screwed up her face and waved her hands at him. "You _cannot_ use that against me!"

"But you do!"

"And you think that will make all our problems magically disappear?"

"We've been doing alright so far."

"We have been _tolerating_ each other's presence," she spat.

"Isn't it at least a start?" he protested. "A stepping stone? Can't we talk?"

"About what?" she asked. "Dick, I do not trust you anymore."

It was like a slap in the face. It sent him reeling.

Starfire gasped, her face turning that odd yellow-peach colour and she collapsed. Flinging her arms forward, she managed to catch the bed.

He rushed around the bed to her. "Star? Star!"

She twisted and sat, her back propped against the mattress as she panted. "_Oooh_."

He panicked as he knelt beside her. "What? What's wrong?"

Legs spread apart, she rested them flat on the floor and rubbed her belly in circular motions. "She does not like us fighting."

"Contractions?"

She bent her head back so it was supported by the bed and stared at the roof, a tear leaking from the corner of her eye and down to her ear. "I do not know. But it hurt."

"It's too early. I'll get Raven."

"No," she said and grabbed his hand to stop him. "Let them have this night. It might only be one."

"What can I do?"

"I would ask you to leave, but somehow I do not think that is happening tonight."

"Not a chance. What else can I do?"

She sighed. "Just sit."

He did, sitting beside her knees so he could see her. "Do you want me to rub?" he asked, gesturing her hands.

Her hands flopped away from her belly. "Please."

He gently placed his hands against her. "Oh, god, it's hard." Her stomach felt like a solid rock beneath his palm, he'd never felt it so hard before.

She nodded. "It hurt."

He rubbed in little circles. "Braxton Hicks, maybe?"

"What are Braxton Hicks?"

"Practice contractions. You probably call them something else."

"Oh." She closed her eyes. "Possibly."

"I don't want to fight with you, Star."

"I do not wish to fight either."

"I wasn't really thinking," he confessed. "About after. I just wanted to tell you."

She took a deep breath and let it out slowly.

"We'd danced around each other for so long, I thought you deserved… do you really not trust me anymore?"

She turned her face toward the head of the bed, away from him.

"Star?"

"I… trust that you are a good man," she said. "I trust you wish for the best. I trust you will always be there for our daughter. But my heart? I do not think I should. There is so much hurt there."

"Could we work on that?" he asked. "Could we try?"

"Why?" she asked, raising her head. "To what end?"

He continued to rub her stomach, trying to sooth tired muscles. It had softened enough he was fairly sure it didn't hurt anymore but he didn't stop. Large ovals, on either side of her belly, his hands slipping across the fabric of her dress. It pooled around her hips, hiked up her legs by her position and Dick would've spared a thought for her decency if she'd cared about that sort of thing. "I told Raven all that was needed was love, but that's not exactly true. You need respect and trust. Compromise. Honesty."

She watched him.

"We had all that once. We're slowly getting back there, at least we were. I don't 'tolerate' you, Star. I look forward to every moment I spend with you and I hate going home to my empty apartment. I look forward to your smile, the way you light up a room. I want to be around you, all the time."

"It is not real."

"It _is_ real," he said. "Because it feels like it did in the beginning. Back when we started dating. Hell, it even feels a little like the beginning of the friends-with-benefits, I was so happy you were back in my life, I took any form of contact you were willing to have. I'm older now, and not that stupid or thinking with… that part of my anatomy over anything else but it still feels the same. I get the same rush every time I see you."

"That will fade."

"I don't doubt that. It's a proven fact, the tingle of new love does fade. But I think about you all day, wondering what you're doing, how you are, how the baby is. I think in long term goals, far in the future, things we'll do together, things we'll do as a family. That won't fade. We keep coming back to each other, finding each other. I feel more strongly for you than I ever have for anyone else. I want to fight to keep you. I won't let go."

She shook her head, not believing him. "Dick…"

"Love's a good start, isn't it? A good foundation."

"I—"

He picked up her hand and pressed it to his cheek. "You touch me and it feels the same as when we started. You touch me and I'm home."

Starfire burst into giggles which she quickly smothered. "That is Dory's line."

Dick blinked. Then grinned. "Do I get points for being corny then?"

She nodded. Her thumb brushed against his check, then her finger tips lingered before she pulled her hand away. "What about Babs?"

Dick returned to rubbing her belly. "I honestly don't know. Babs saw this coming. She knew, which I think is why she got out early. She's always been your biggest advocate. Dropping hints and dragging me along to Fashion Week so I could talk to you."

"But what about her feelings?" Starfire asked. "She wanted to be— you _both_ wanted—"

Dick shrugged. "She's dating that Jason Bard guy." He was pleased when he didn't sound bitter.

"But—"

"She made her choice, Star."

"And if she had not?" Starfire pressed.

"Then… I would've realised I still love you, told her she was right and I'd still be here rubbing your belly asking you to take me back."

"Is that what you're asking?"

"It is. Maybe if she hadn't pushed me away, it would've been different. I honestly don't know."

She bit her bottom lip. "It also does not change the fact that you are here because of the baby. We would not be here, like this, were it not for her."

"That's true. But we _are_ here, and Gally is the reason, why not take—"

"Gally?" she asked, her eyebrows shooting up.

He chuckled and shrugged. "I dunno. Sounded cute. We need something to call her other than 'the baby'. Maybe that can be her middle name."

"Perhaps." She chewed her lip again. "What if Babs had reciprocated from the start? If she had not asked you to wait."

"We can't live our lives on what ifs. This is what happened. This is where we are." Stretching out his hand, he traced her collarbone with the tips of his fingers. He wondered if she'd let him touch her like this, it was more intimate than normal, especially when he ran his fingers to the hollow of her throat, then up her neck to her jaw.

Her lips parted as she let out a shaky breath.

"I'm not asking us to pick up where we left off." He stroked a finger down her chin. "I don't want to jump back into a relationship. I'm just asking is there enough left to build from."

Feeling daring, he shifted forward, kneeling beside her instead of sitting. His other hand lifted from her belly, taking her hand to direct to his chest. Once her hand rested over his heart, he touched her neck while the hand which traversed her face cupped her cheek. As slowly as he could, he leant in toward her. There would be no mistaking his approach or his intent, but he wanted to give her time to either accept or turn away.

He hoped she didn't turn away.

She swallowed, her eyes locked on his, going cross eyed as he grew closer.

His nose brushed against her and his eyes slid closed. Touching his lips gently to hers, once, then he pulled away a fraction. Enough so their faces still touched, but he could judge whether or not she wanted him to kiss her more. Peeking through his eyelashes, he saw her eyes were closed and felt her face rise up against his.

Another soft press against her lips.

Her hand curled on his chest. Not pushing him away, holding him there.

He brushed his face against hers. If this whole ordeal had taught him something, it was just how responsive she was to touch. Kissing was Earthen, this was for _her_. Soft, gentle brushes of his nose to her cheek, lips on the corner of her eye. The pads of his fingers lightly stroking to tease but strong enough to hold her in place. His cheek skimmed against hers as he made his way down to her lips.

Her breathing increased.

As he placed another tiny kiss against her lips, his hands glided away from her face, down her neck and over her shoulders to tickle her upper arms.

"Dick," she breathed and he felt her hand on his hip.

"We'll take things slow," he promised, his lips brushing the corner of her mouth as he spoke. "Remember how we were. We have all the time in the world. Okay?"

"This is not fair," she whispered.

"Do you want me to stop?"

A soft moan. "No."

"Can we try again?"

"Hmm. You are not settling because—"

"I'm not settling. I choose this, I choose _you_. I want to be with you."

"You are certain?" Glazed eyes stared at him, wanting answers but also seduced by touch.

"Very certain."

She gave a tiny nod and slid her eyes shut.

He grinned, touching their lips again. "One more thing," he murmured.

"Yes?"

"Have I still ruined tonight?"

Starfire's eyes opened and she laughed. Grinning, Dick swallowed her laughter with kisses.

* * *

**_Author's Note 2:_**

_Pregnancy facts: Braxton Hicks is the technical term for practice contractions. Every pregnancy will have it (even if you've been pregnant before), but not every pregnancy will have the strong ones like Starfire just experienced. Sometimes they can be so weak you don't notice, sometimes they will knock you off your feet, it just depends. _

_Ways to tell Braxton Hicks: There is no rhythm. Braxton Hicks are irregular, real contractions are as regular as fuck, steadily getting stronger. Braxton Hicks will change if you change position, including disappearing completely. _

_Depending on who you are, your body type and fluid levels, Braxton Hicks cam turn your stomach hard, sometimes that's the only way you know they're happening (although stomach being hard can be caused by other things). They do and can hurt. They can simulate real contractions, to the extent you can be fooled by them and head to the hospital to check (happened to me)._

_Braxton Hicks are more easily felt at rest, but can be brought on by exhaustion too. If you have any pregnancy question, feel free to ask, I will cover things if I mention them in the story._


	26. Morning After

**_Author's Note:_**

_I have spent my last two writing sessions watching Attack on Titan instead of writing. Whoops. SO WORTH IT. But it does mean I am a little behind on where I wanted to be with this. Playing catch up.  
_

* * *

**Morning after**

Dick dozed. It was hard to wake up completely, especially when there was this wonderful warmth against his chest. The big double bed in Starfire's room in Azarath invited sleep and after last night he was determined to catch up on it as much as he could.

Different than when she snuggled up to him during the previous weeks, now he was allowed to hold her too. To lie on his back and take her in his arms. To hug her and return the affection she'd been trying to keep to a minimum. Already he could tell she was better for it, she was sleeping deeper than she had in a while.

He stroked his fingers down her arm, shifting a little and he felt a kick against his thigh. "Morning, Gally," he whispered, twitching his leg to give Starfire's belly a small rub.

"Do not encourage her," Starfire murmured. She lifted her foot over his shin and tucked it under his calf.

"Well, morning to you then."

"Shh. Sleeping."

"Not to be unromantic, but I need to pee."

Starfire opened her eyes, blinked twice, then rolled over. "I am first," she said as she rolled off the edge of the bed and onto her feet, disappearing into the bathroom.

Dick laughed quietly to himself and he swung his feet over the edge of the bed. Scrubbing his hands through his hair, he stretched and yawned. Looking down at his pants, he scrunched up his nose. "Alfred's going to kill me."

"Oh?" Starfire called. "Why?"

"Wrinkled the suit."

"I did say you should return to your own room."

"Not a chance. Not with that Braxton Hicks last night."

"And the snuggles?" she asked and the toilet flushed. She came out a moment later, standing in the door with her toothbrush in her mouth.

He waited until the toilet had finished its noise before he answered. "We should make this a regular thing, instead of a once in a while."

She raised her eyebrows in question.

"Overnight snuggles," he clarified.

She frowned and removed her toothbrush. "I thought you said we would take things slow—"

"I'm talking snuggles, not sex. Believe it or not, I think I like them more now."

She turned sly. "So, you do not wish to have sex any time soon?"

"When you're ready," he said, grinning. "Overnight snuggles, though… Surely we can skip a _few_ steps, right? Or do I need to woo you to be able to spend the night?"

"Some wooing might be beneficial to your case."

He laughed. "I'll remember that. Can I use the bathroom now?"

"What time is it?" she asked, heading back in the bathroom.

He checked his watch. "Half past ten."

She eeped.

"What?"

"We are supposed to be having the late breakfast at eleven!"

"We are?"

She rushed out of the bathroom, picked up his jacket and threw it at him. "Go and utilise your own bathroom," she instructed. "I need to shower."

"But—"

"I shall see you at breakfast," she said, hurrying back into her bathroom and Dick heard the shower turn on.

"I—"

"Go, Dick!"

Feeling dismissed, he gathered up his shoes. "It's not formal breakfast?"

"No," she called. "Casual."

Jacket over one arm, shoes in his hands; he knew he'd be doing the walk of shame. "Okay. See you soon."

Starfire poked her head out of the bathroom door, her bare shoulder dotted with water. "Dick?"

He turned. "Yeah?"

She beckoned him with her finger and he went to her like a bee to flowers. Grabbing the front of his shirt, she pulled him forward and pressed her lips to his. "I shall see you soon," she said with a smile, and then disappeared into the bathroom again.

Okay, so he'd be doing the walk of shame with shoes in hand, jacket over his arm and a silly grin.

He was back at her door within twenty minutes, showered, teeth done and hair reasonably well tamed, dressed in jeans and a buttoned shirt and his Nightwing mask. "Star?"

She opened the door, hairbrush in hand, wearing a yellow sundress. "That was quick."

He snorted. "You've never complained about that before."

She blinked rapidly before she giggled.

"I thought I'd escort you to breakfast."

"Oh?" she asked, running the brush through her hair.

"It's really just an excuse to hold your hand."

"Should you be as Nightwing?"

"I'll be gallant," he said. "Besides, the mask's for the Monks, no one else."

She tossed her brush back onto the bed and closed the door behind her. "Okay," she said and took his hand.

Walking to breakfast with intertwined fingers was different than he remembered. It was new and exciting and he felt like he would burst with emotion. Starfire seemed nervous and excited too, her face flushed as she giggled.

"You are all of the flirt," she said.

"Is that okay?"

"Yes, I think so. I had forgotten how flirty you could be."

Nightwing laughed. "I finally understand the phrase 'giddy as a school boy'."

She tilted her head at him. "I do not."

"I just…" He leant in so he could whisper. "I just want to pick you up and hold you to the wall and kiss you senseless."

Starfire stopped walking. "_Oh_."

Nightwing walked the extra pace so he could twist to face her. "Like that idea?" he asked with a smirk.

"I… I am too heavy," she said.

"You're not too heavy," he said. "And I wouldn't actually do it, it would be awkward around Gally. But that doesn't mean I don't want to try. Or think about it." He grinned. "Besides, just doing this—" he took the back of her neck and pulled her forward to kiss her "—has merits of its own which require exploring."

Starfire blinked owlishly at him for a moment. "It does?"

"Do you want to run another test?" he asked.

She nodded. "Yes."

He kissed her and she wrapped her arms around his neck, burying her fingers in his hair to return the kiss with gusto. In the middle of the long hallway in a Tower in Azarath. Right in front of the double doors where the other Titans were waiting for them.

"Well, well, well," Cyborg drawled. "Look what we have here."

Nightwing heard the voice, felt the presence of his friends and thought 'screw it'.

"They'll have to come up for air soon," Beast Boy commented.

"Don't count on it," Raven said. "You remember what this was like."

"Ahh, young love," Beast Boy said.

Starfire pulled away, breathless, flustered and sheepish. "Greetings."

"Hi, fly girl," Cyborg drawled in that smug tone. "Anything you'd like to share?"

"Dick finally got over his denial," Raven said. "That part's obvious."

Nightwing chuckled. "We're trying again."

"No, really?" Beast Boy teased. "I would never have guessed."

"Breakfast?" Raven asked, gesturing.

Starfire glanced at Nightwing then bounded after Raven. Nightwing went to follow, only to have his path blocked by Cyborg and Beast Boy, wearing matching frowns and their arms crossed on their chest.

"What?"

"You hurt her again," Cyborg said, glowering.

"We'll hurt you," Beast Boy said and bared his teeth.

"Chew you up and spit you out."

"That's my line," Beast Boy complained.

"No, you had the line about skinning him alive," Cyborg corrected.

Beast Boy scowled. "Dude, like, that came _before_ the chew you up line."

Nightwing held up his hands. "You made your point, guys. No hurting Starfire."

"We'll be watching," Cyborg said.

"We're all over the watching." Beast Boy pointed to his own eyes with two fingers, then at Nightwing.

"I know."

"And what you said last night?" Cyborg scowled.

"What'd he say last night?" Beast Boy asked.

"I told her the truth," Nightwing said.

"Man, you were so close to being punched in the face."

Nightwing nodded. "I know. I appreciate the restraint."

"Not restraint," Cyborg said. "I couldn't figure out which one of you was real."

Nightwing laughed nervously.

"No, seriously, what'd he say?" Beast Boy asked.

"Nothing which merits repeating," Cyborg said and side-stepped out of the way. "Breakfast?"

**Home again**

Dick placed the two suitcases by the wall and waved to Herald. "Thanks man!"

"No problem," Herald called and let the portal from Azarath close. "See you guys 'round."

"Bye Raven!" Starfire called through before it could completely close. "Enjoy yourself!"

Silkie came warbling out of the main bedroom, right by both of them and to his food dish, where he gave them both a pitiful look. "I'll feed him, shall I?" Dick said, laughing at the worm's expression.

"Please," she murmured as she sat on the lounge, twisting so she could put her feet up.

"How're you doing?" Dick asked, watching as she grabbed a couple of cushions for her back.

"Tired," she said. "I do hope Raven and Beast Boy enjoy their moon of honey."

Slipping back into that sort of phrasing showed Dick just how tired she was. He fetched a can of food for Silkie from the cupboard, pulling off the ringed lid. "I'm sure they will, Beast Boy was very excited."

"It was a very nice celebration."

"The best… calm down bud," he told Silkie as he dumped the food into the bowl. "There. Enjoy." He washed his hands then walked over to sit beside Starfire, picking up her legs and putting them on his lap. Pulling off one of her shoes, he said, "I suppose we should hash out some finer details."

"Hmm?"

He rubbed her feet. "Yeah."

"Must we?" she asked, sleepy.

"You just want to play it by ear?" he asked.

She nodded. "Discuss something as it comes up." She wriggled. "Although I think it would be best if you informed Babs."

"Huh?"

"As a courtesy," she murmured.

"Yeah. I suppose."

She arched an eyebrow at him. "If you are reconsidering—"

"No, you're right, I should tell her before anyone else does. I'll call her first thing in the morning."

"When do you return to work?"

"Wednesday. You?"

"I have a hand modelling session on Tuesday." She lifted her hands to look at them. "And a manicure appointment on Monday."

"I'll drive you."

She smiled at him. "Okay."

Dick laughed. "I should've kissed you a lot sooner," he said. "You've become amenable!"

She poked him in the side with her toes. "That was not nice."

"Sorry. Can I ask about sleeping arrangements?"

"What about them?"

"Do I get to stay over more now?"

She closed her eyes. "Is my bed more comfortable than your own?"

"The company is _much_ better," he said. "Plus snuggles. But, I mean…" He slipped off her other shoe so he could rub that foot as well. "I know there were nights you sent me home when you should've asked me to stay. Trying to keep your distance and such. I was just wondering if you were still going to do that."

"Possibly not as often," she mumbled, not completely awake anymore.

He smiled at her. "Afternoon naptime?"

She rested her hand on her belly. "Shh."

**12 weeks**

"Honey, I'm home," Dick sang as he entered Starfire's apartment, using her spare key.

"I shall be out in a moment!" she returned from somewhere in the apartment. "How did it go with Babs?"

"She did the 'told you so' wheelchair rap."

"Oh?"

"And wished us luck. Oh, _and_ she ordered the lobster and made me pay."

Starfire laughed. She poked her head out of the baby's room. "But it went okay?"

"Yeah." He unhooked his laptop strap from around his shoulders and left it on her kitchen bench. "No hard feelings. She was expecting it, you know? She did thank me for letting her know first, then got me in trouble for taking so long. We agreed to let bygones be bygones and go back to being friends. Said she'll call you later tonight."

"Are you okay?"

He paused to consider that. It was a serious question and deserved a proper answer. "You know… I think I am. Yeah." He chuckled. "Seems I was the last to know how I felt. Alfred called me to congratulate us."

Giggling, Starfire brushed her hair out of her eyes and Dick spotted her fingers covered in paint.

He tilted his head. "What are you doing in there?"

"Repainting," she replied, ducking back inside. "The colour was wrong."

"Again?" he asked, taking off his jacket and leaving it on the sofa as he walked to the baby's room. This wasn't the first time she'd changed her mind about the colour over the course of the pregnancy. "Star—"

"It was wrong," she insisted.

He stopped in the doorway. "It's… Star, it's like no different."

"It is seventeen shades lighter," she explained, as she lathered up the roller. "You simply cannot see."

"I'm not colour blind."

"Compared to me, you are."

Dick sighed. "What was wrong with the colour before?"

"It was too dark," she said and began rolling the paint on the wall. "This is much more appropriate."

"Right," he said, distracted.

"Are you going to assist me?" she asked, tilting her head at him.

"Yup, sure."

"What are you looking at?"

"You," he said.

The roller paused. "What?" she asked, getting this tiny, hopeful smile.

Dick grinned, gripped the front of her shirt and pulled her in for a kiss.

The painting was forgotten for a little while.

**10 weeks**

She had a waddle. A pregnancy waddle. And it was the cutest darn walk Dick had ever seen. He'd stand behind her just so he could see her walking.

And get jokingly accused of watching her ass.

Well, he was doing that too.

**9 weeks**

Snuggles on the couch, watching a movie, on a rainy Sunday afternoon. Dick didn't think it could get any better than this. Starfire curled up against him, using his chest as a pillow. Much more natural and intimate than their snuggles had been before they started dating again. Those had been simply sitting side by side, with perhaps his arm around her. Now, she draped herself over him. Arms and hands and legs, it made him realise just how much she had been holding back from him. It was like the floodgates had opened and she was free.

They both were.

Dick ran his fingers against her neck, then down the front of her shirt. Distracted from the movie, Starfire tilted her head back so he could kiss her.

Certainly couldn't do that before.

**8 ½ weeks**

"Are you sure you're ready?"

"My people are most sexual—"

"I know that but… what if it hurts—"

"Girl on top," she crooned. "Are you telling me you do not wish to?"

"Oh. _God_."

A breathless laugh. "Let me love you."

**8 weeks**

The baby's room was finally finished. Or finished until Starfire's next set of nesting instincts kicked in at least but Dick was pretty sure by that stage he'd be doing all the hard work of rearranging or _painting_, and she'd be ordering him about.

He had to admit, the baby's room looked pretty awesome. She'd finally settled on a colour, she called it deep fuchsia, he called it purple. She had a white cradle in the corner, a white set of drawers and a change table beside that, and a rocking chair for those late night feeds. There was a small chest in the corner, covered with various stuffed animals.

He didn't like that gleam in her eye when she looked into his study in his apartment though. Like she was sizing it up to transform it too. He did see the benefit of having a baby's room at his place too, but… well, he hadn't exactly been spending a lot of time at his apartment lately. Spending every night at hers, whether it was sleeping or the other recreational activity which had become part of their relationship again and he didn't expect it to change anytime soon.

Didn't want it to change.

"Do you like it?" Starfire asked.

He lifted his arm so she could tuck herself into his side. "Needs more stuffed animals."

She giggled. "That can be arranged."

He pressed his lips to her temple. "It's perfect."

"I thought of a name," Starfire said, snuggling into him.

"Oh?" he asked.

"Although… I am not clear on the Earthen traditions regarding this, but on Tamaran, it is common to name a child after a loved one."

Dick raised his eyebrow. "I thought that's why we were calling her Gally."

She beamed at him. "Yes, but as you said, that shall be her middle name. I was thinking of the first."

"Okay. I'm curious."

"I was thinking, perhaps, if it was the okay with you—"

"You're rambling," he teased.

She took a deep breath. "Mar'i."

He stilled. "After…" he swallowed the lump in his throat. "After…"

"After your mother."

He stared at her.

She babbled, like she always did when she was nervous or upset. "M.A.R. apostrophe, i. I realise it is not the same, and the ending sounds different, more like Mar-ee, but I wished to keep some semblance of a Tamaranian feel and that was the only one I felt portrayed both our heritages." She tapped her fingers together. "Although… Mar'i Gally sounds a little like the nursery rhyme."

"Mar'i Galfora then," Dick said.

"Then you like it?" Starfire asked, brightening.

"Mar'i Galfora Grayson. That's got a nice ring to it. I love it." Releasing Starfire, he got down on his knees so he could kiss her belly. "I'll call her Mar'i Gal for cutesies."

Starfire giggled. "Mar'i Gal, Cyborg will love that."

**7 weeks**

She purred.

Late at night, while snuggled and sleeping, he'd be woken by a rumble. A shudder running through her body and into his.

He asked her about it in the waking hours and all she said was, "I am happy."

"Weren't you happy before?"

"Not like this," she replied.

"Not even when we were first together?" he asked, feeling sad.

"Oh, then," she murmured and placed her hand on his cheek. "You never stayed the whole night."

**6 ½ weeks**

Late night cravings were the worst. She didn't get many, but when she did, Dick would find himself wandering the streets at three in the morning, looking for some open shop to sell him rose petals, mayonnaise, dragon fruit, mixed nuts and pickles in juice.

It was easier if he looked, since he didn't like the idea of Starfire walking around heavily pregnant in the middle of the night and he'd caught her trying to slip out a couple of times, not wanting to disturb him.

It didn't help when she confessed she'd gone out on her own the entire pregnancy already.

**6 weeks**

"Dick?"

"Hmm?" he asked, looking up from his laptop to smile at her. "What's up?"

She looked at him with uncertain eyes. "I have been thinking."

"I am not repainting Mar'i's room," he said, firm. "I like the colour. It looks great."

She gave a burst of nervous laughter. "No. That is not what I was thinking about." Glancing down at Silkie –who had trouble sitting comfortably on her lap anymore and was in a semi-circle around her belly– she scratched him on the back. "You spend most of your time here now."

"Yeah…"

"And many times overnight."

"Am I overcrowding you?" he asked, a sudden surge of anxiety sweeping over him. Closing the laptop, he shoved it toward the coffee table and prepared to argue his case. "Because—"

"No," she replied.

He pulled up short, his jaw clicking shut. "I'm not?"

"You are not."

"Oh."

She ran her fingers along Silkie's back and the worm wiggled in response. "It simply seems to me… you have a shelf in my bathroom. A space in my closet. Your cereal in my pantry. Your laundry goes with mine."

"Um… so?"

She gave him a small smile. "When was the last time you went to your apartment?"

He scratched his head. "Um… I can't… I went there a couple of days ago to check my mail."

"I do not foresee you wishing to spend much time there when Mar'i is born."

Dick narrowed his eyes and waited. He could read the social cues of where she was headed, at least he hoped he was reading them right. He could be completely wrong, which is why he chose to wait until she voiced her thoughts before he spoke.

"It seems silly to have two apartments, does it not?" she asked, then pressed on without waiting for him. "Especially when one gets so little use. I thought it might be easier if perhaps you were to simply move your belongings over here rather than spending so much money every week maintaining a place you rarely visit. Oh!" she covered her mouth as she realised something. "But your Nightwing equipment, I do not have the alleyway to hide your bike, or any space for your gym equipment, that would not be—"

"Yes."

She looked stricken. "My apologies, I was simply voicing my thoughts, I did not think that through thoroughly, please do not—"

He laughed. "No, Star. I mean: Yes, I'll move in with you."

She brightened. "You will?"

He reached for her hand. "If you're sure you're ready for that."

She nodded. "I am. But what about—"

"Bruce and I have been talking about investing in new Nightwatch posts around Bludhaven for me; we'll just add one more near here. I can get rid of the gym equipment, in truth I've been using the gym near my station for a while now. And everything else… well… I pack light."

She smiled.

"Are you sure though? We haven't been together for very long and—"

"I like having you here," she replied. "I want you here."

Dick grinned. "Great."

**5 weeks**

Starfire would come waddling into the police station every now and then, especially around lunchtime. Dick would be back from police patrol for his break and to file any reports which needed doing before his next patrol and the murmurings would start and he'd know she was coming.

People still couldn't believe someone like him could have someone like her. At times, he didn't believe it himself. Then she'd waddle over to his desk, smiling brightly and so very happy to see him and they'd have lunch together down by the river.

It was all so very domestic of them. And he loved it.

**2 weeks**

The funniest thing Dick ever saw was coming home from work to their apartment and finding his girlfriend stuck on the floor an unable to get up. She'd gotten down there, lying on some cushions on the floor, so she could get her feet higher than her body and hopefully relieve some of the swelling in her feet.

And gotten stuck in the cushions and had to be helped out.

**Hello!**

Mar'i Galfora Grayson entered the world early on a Sunday morning after a sixteen hour labour. A shock of black hair and Starfire's eyes, she was the cutest little thing Dick had ever seen. Labour itself had been a harrowing experience, one which Dick was very happy to put behind him. While Starfire had been magnificent, it was still hard to watch someone he loved in pain.

Now, at dawn, when most of their friends would still be in bed and the announcement not yet made, he sat on the hospital bed beside Starfire while she rested, cradling his little girl in his arms. The lights were dim, it was only them now that the hustle and bustle of hospital staff had died back and they had a chance to get to know their girl.

They counted her fingers, her little toes, watched as she moved, listened to every little noise she made, waiting for her to open her eyes so they could view their green.

Starfire smiled tiredly at him, her fingers trailing Mar'i's forehead. "She is perfect."

Dick pressed his lips to Starfire's cheek. "Just like her mom."

* * *

**_Author's Note:_**

_I totally never got stuck on the floor heavily pregnant. Nuh-ah. Wasn't me._

_Oh, as you can see, this chapter and the next one is mostly filler. Designed to hurry the story along and provide a few moments. _


	27. Countdown

**_Author's Note:_**

_So sorry for the wait, guys. I've been knocked for six by the flu, came down with it last Friday and am really only just back on my feet now. I'm not entirely happy with the quality of this filler chapter, but we need to get moving again, so here you go! (I'll probably revist this chapter later and add more filler).  
_

_Transient: Gah! Sorry, I meant to put this in last chapter and I plum forgot. I'm really glad you like my work. I put a lot of time and effort into it (more than I probably should while doing my own stories at the same time). The Titans universe is just so delightful and expanse to explore and the characters are lovely too, I can't not take the time to see all they have to offer. Unfortunately, all good things must come to an end, but hopefully there'll be other writers who will continue to explore the wondrous world of the Titans._

* * *

**Countdown**

**Meeting**

"Oh, she is adorable," Cyborg crooned, peering over Raven's shoulder. "Can I hold her?"

"Mine," Raven said and made cooing noises as she brushed her fingers over Mar'i's face.

Dick laughed. "Watch out, B, you're next."

Beast Boy cast him a startled look. "Oh, god. Quick, Cy, take the baby."

"Not ready for puppies yet?" Cyborg grinned.

"Oh, shush," Raven replied. "Let me have a moment."

"What did you call her?" Cyborg asked, tearing his eyes away from Mar'i to look at Starfire.

"Mar'i," Starfire murmured, shifting position on the bed to a more comfortable one. She still looked tired, they both were, the high emotions of last night's birth had worn off, leaving them drained but still happy.

"Mar'i Galfora," Dick added.

"Galfora?" Cyborg asked, grinning. "So, I can call her—"

"Mar'i Gal," Dick laughed. "Yeah, we thought you'd like that."

"Oh, man, this is gonna be so much fun. Is it my turn yet?" Cyborg asked.

Raven sighed and reluctantly placed Mar'i in Cyborg's arms. Taking a critical look at Starfire, she asked. "And how are you?"

"Tired," Starfire said. "But happy."

"Oh, who's a cute baby, you're a cute baby."

"Would you like some acceleration?" Raven asked, coming to stand by Starfire's bed.

"She's so tiny," Beast Boy crooned.

Dick blinked. "_Can_ you accelerate this? I thought—"

"B, check out her itsy bitsy fingers."

"It'll make recover a lot easier," Raven said. "I won't mess with hormones. Some things need to heal naturally, but if there was any tearing…"

"Oh, pwitty eyes."

"Thank you," Starfire said. "I would appreciate any assistance you can offer."

"Green, just like your mommy's."

"Button nose. _Boop_."

"Oh, you'll be a heartbreaker."

"And I thought girls were the ones to stoop to cutesy baby names," Raven muttered as she placed her hands on Starfire.

"She can't play yet," Dick told them.

"So what?" Cyborg crooned at Mar'i, her head cradled in the palm of her hand. "Tone of voice, man, she knows her uncles."

"Can I have a hold now?" Beast Boy blurted.

"Sure," Cyborg said, gently transferring the baby into Beast Boy's arms.

"She's so light."

"She's floating, B," Dick said, proud.

"Already?" Beast Boy asked, surprised.

"Hasn't touched down since birth," Dick told them, grinning broadly.

Mar'i let out a thin wail.

"Oops! Did I break her?" Beast Boy blurted, passing her back to Dick as quickly as he could. "Is she okay?"

"Feeding time, I think," Dick said and handed her over to Starfire. "Wanna have another go?"

"I will try," Starfire murmured.

"Oh," Beast Boy pouted. "Okay. But I didn't get a very long—"

"Later," Dick said. "Out. Shoo."

"Girls need their privacy," Cyborg said, thumping his hand down on Beast Boy's shoulder. "We'll come back."

Dick watched them go, then turned to Starfire as she cooed at her baby. "Do you want me to go?"

"It is fine," she said, smiling at Raven as she too left the room, then her smile slipped to a grimace, passing Mar'i back to Dick so she could fumble with her gown. "Feeding attempt number two."

"Just relax," Dick said. "You'll get there. They said this would take time."

"I am thankful she does not feed as much on my energy," Starfire said. "I look forward to its return."

Dick sat in the chair beside her bed. "How long does that take?"

"A month or two. She will still require some for a while, but most of what she requires comes in the milk."

"Like our babies. Minus the energy transfer."

She nodded. "Ah!" she announced, triumphant. "There."

Dick grinned. "See? Told you it would get easier."

"You did."

He put his elbows on the bed and rested his chin in his hands. "I'm so jealous."

Starfire laughed.

**Puppy love**

Silkie stared into the cradle from Starfire's shoulder, his eyes wide. Dick watched the worm carefully, waiting for any sign of aggression. They'd done everything they could to prepare the worm for Mar'i's arrival but it was impossible to predict how he would react. There were no manuals for a worm.

From the moment they'd walked into their apartment, Silkie had been staring at Mar'i, steadily moving closer. He'd sat on Dick's lap, watching as Starfire fed Mar'i. He'd sat on Starfire's shoulder as Dick burped her and cuddled her back to sleep. And now, as they put Mar'i in her cradle for a sleep, Silkie still stared.

Now, when it seemed the baby was finally alone did Silkie approach. He wriggled down Starfire's arm, pausing every step to stare at the tiny baby. He reached Starfire's hands and she gripped him to prevent him from going all the way into the cradle before they knew how he would react.

Sniffing the air, Silkie blinks slowly.

Mar'i gurgled and waved her little hands in the air for a moment before they flopped out of the blankets. Dick reached down to tuck them back under.

Silkie stared at Mar'i, then up at Dick, then began to writhe in Starfire's arms. Concerned, she pulled him away from the cradle and placed him on the floor. Silkie scampered away.

"That did not go so well," Starfire whispered.

"Give him time," Dick whispered, adjusting Mar'i's blanket even though it didn't need it. "She's so new. He'll get used to it."

There was a thump from the living room, followed by something being dragged across the floor.

Dick and Starfire looked at each other, before heading for the door to see what their worm was doing.

"What?"

Silkie looked up at them. His usual warble was a meep around a mouthful of his blanket.

"Do you wish to be wrapped up too?" Starfire asked, reaching down to pick up both worm and blanket.

Silkie wouldn't let himself be wrapped, scurrying back up Starfire's arm to her shoulder before Starfire could wrap him. He looked over at Mar'i again, his hind body wagging furiously.

Dick considered. "I think…"

Starfire stared at Dick. "Does he…?"

"I think he might."

Starfire carried the blanket over to the cradle and placed it at the end, near Mar'i's feet. Silkie scampered down again, took a mouthful of blanket and dragged it upward.

"Guess he does," Dick said, taking the blanket from Silkie. He arranged it so it wasn't covering Mar'i's face.

Silkie gave them a pleased look and returned to Starfire's shoulder.

Dick stretched out his hand and scratched Silkie on the back. "Good boy."

They stood there, the three of them, watching the little baby who joined their family.

The quiet was shattered by the doorbell. Mar'i wailed. Starfire threw Dick a wild glance as she reached down to gather Mar'i and Dick headed to the door to complain to whoever it was that just woke their daughter.

"Dude!" Wally said, grinning at him broadly with Jinx by his side. "Hi daddy!"

"I told him not to ring the doorbell," Jinx murmured, hearing the wails. "Sorry."

Wally cringed. "Oh. Bugger. Did I wake her?"

Dick leant on the door. "Yup. Thanks."

Starfire appeared in the bedroom doorway, gently rocking Mar'i. "Ahh," she said as she saw who it was.

"Typical, huh?" Dick teased.

"I'm really sorry," Wally said.

"We'll come back," Jinx said, scowling at Wally.

"No, come in, welcome," Starfire said. "Give me a moment to get her settled."

Jinx went to Starfire, cooing softly as she looked at Mar'i.

"Drink?" Dick asked Wally.

"Smashing," Wally replied, grinning.

**Sleeping like a baby**

"That phrase is so wrong," Dick grunted.

Starfire groaned into her pillow.

"I got her, love," Dick muttered, heaving himself out of bed.

"I would have thought I would be used to broken sleep."

"Not like this," Dick said. "Yeah, yeah, I'm coming." He padded to the cradle they'd moved into their bedroom for the first couple of weeks, gently lifting the crying baby. "Daddy's got you."

Walking back to the bed, Starfire was ready to feed and he handed the bundle over to her. "Hopefully she'll go straight back to sleep."

"I hope so."

"My turn to walk her if she doesn't," Dick mumbled, sliding back into bed beside her. "Wake me."

"Are you sure?"

"Yup."

"Okay."

It seemed like only minutes later, although as he looked at the clock was actually a good half hour, Starfire prodded him awake. "She is fed and burped, her diaper has been changed but I think she requires the cuddle to sleep."

"On it."

"Do you think we should be following the books instructions to allow her to fall asleep on her own?" Starfire mumbled as she handed him their daughter.

"Probably. When she's older. Right now, I like the cuddles."

Starfire gave him a tired smile. "I do too."

"Probably why we're so tired," he commented and kissed Starfire on the forehead. Holding Mar'i to his shoulder he said, "Get some sleep. I'll see you in a bit."

Starfire flopped back down in the middle of the bed and shut her eyes.

As tired as he was, Dick loved these moments in the middle of the night, dark and comforting, with a little baby against his bare shoulder. He knew the tiredness he felt now was nothing like what he would feel in a few weeks, or months from now. There was a long journey ahead of them and they were still adjusting. Right now, though, Mar'i was still precious and new and wonderful to cuddle. Every day she changed, becoming more alert, having longer waking moments. Gurgles, cuddles, feeds and dirty diapers were her life.

Lounging on the sofa, he placed her chest to his, turning her head slightly so she could breathe and settled down to watch her fall asleep.

**Christmas**

A Wayne Family tradition meant that Christmas was spent together, no matter what. It was a tradition which Dick had honoured every year, even when he and Bruce were estranged. When he was living with the Titans, when only the boys celebrated Christmas, they used to have an early celebration so that Dick could go back to Gotham (and Cyborg to his grandparents) for the holidays. Dick had only spent one Christmas with Starfire before, and that was when she'd joined him in Gotham the year they dated.

So this was a very big Christmas for them. Not only was it the first one back together, but also Mar'i's first Christmas. So Dick and Starfire decided to spend Christmas Eve until Boxing Day at the Manor.

Mar'i was four weeks by then, still brand new but active enough they could see some of her personality shining as it formed. She liked bright lights. She'd wriggle toward Silkie when he lay beside her. She loved snuggles. She made cute noises when she fed. And her burps could rival Cyborg's.

Starfire was a little anxious about being away from home for two nights, concerned about the break in routine, but Dick convinced her that it was a good thing. The more they did with Mar'i the better they would be in the long run. Especially since he'd be returning to work after the new year, they needed this break.

Alfred materialised as they parked in the garage in a manner which did not in any way suggest he'd been waiting anxiously for them. Dick had barely turned off the engine when Mar'i's car door had opened. "Allow me to aid you," Alfred said and swept Mar'i away, with Silkie scurrying after to watch over his girl.

Dick was certain the moment Alfred was out of earshot, the cooing noises to Mar'i would begin.

Starfire giggled. "I do believe great _k'norfka_ is excited we are spending a few days here."

Dick winked at her as he went to fetch their bags. "Just a little."

They wandered into the Manor. "Wow," Dick said, looking at the decorations in the main foyer. "Alfred went all out this year."

"He does not do this every year?" Starfire asked, turning slowly so she could take it all in.

Baubles and decorations, the chandelier in the foyer had been transformed into a gigantic holly covered bauble with flashing Christmas lights. Holly laced the handrails of the stairs. Hundreds of little stars hung from strings. There was even a novelty festive scene in the corner, complete with snow.

"Not like this…" Dick wandered up the stairs. "Bruce? Tim?"

"Library!"

"Dick, you're not going to believe this," Tim called.

Starfire and Dick exchanged curious glances and he reached for her hand to hold as they travelled through the main hallway of the Manor to get to the library. Even the hallways were decorated with holly and in the middle of the T-intersection, Dick and Starfire skirted around the big bunch of mistletoe or they'd never make it to the library.

As they grew closer, so did the smell of pine. It wasn't uncommon for Alfred to get a real tree for the Christmas season, but the smell was so strong Dick suspected there was more to it that he'd originally thought. A pinecone fire perhaps?

A pinecone fire was the smallest of the festivity occurring in the library. The tree –_the tree_– filled the middle of the room and stretched upward to the second floor of the library, the massive sparkling star poised on top almost touched the roof. It was covered in baubles and lights and glass globes and little angels and pictures in macaroni frames Dick had made when he was younger, even ones from Bruce's childhood.

"There is a train!" Starfire gasped, looking at the tree and sure enough, as Dick watched, a little toy train zipped out of the branches, around a curve and back under the canopy of pine needles.

"Isn't it incredible?" Tim exclaimed, perched on the arm of the sofa near the tree. "I've been here for hours and I'm still finding something new hidden in the tree."

"He really went all out," Dick said.

Bruce placed his cup back on the saucer. "I think he's just happy the whole family's here for Christmas."

Dick grinned, knowing the feeling. Just having Starfire around, having their daughter around, it was incredibly uplifting, especially at Christmas.

"Where's Mar'i?" Tim asked. "I want a cuddle."

"You'll have to fight Alfred," Dick said. "She's already been stolen."

Tim pouted. "Ahh, what?"

Dick took Starfire's bag from her and shrugged at Tim. "Take it up with him," he said to Tim then turned to Starfire. "I'll go put these in our room."

"Okay."

"Eggnog?" Bruce offered as Dick walked out of the room. "Non-alcoholic."

Alfred met him in the hallway, carrying Mar'i with Silkie perched on his shoulder.

"I didn't think we'd see you for a while," Dick noted, his eyes automatically drawn to Mar'i to check on her.

"She is fussing," Alfred murmured and right on cue, Mar'i mewed.

"Probably hungry. She didn't feed well before we left."

"Ahh," Alfred said, tenderly rubbing Mar'i's back. "In that case, I shall return her to her mother."

Dick smiled.

**New Year**

They watched fireworks light up the night sky from the comfort of their balcony, their baby girl all tucked up safe and warm in bed.

As the count ticked over, they shared a kiss and declarations of love before heading to bed to welcome the new year in a private celebration.

**Approval**

"I'm going to ask Starfire to marry me."

Batman lowered the binoculars.

Nightwing twitched.

Batman waited.

"It's time, don't you think?" Nightwing asked, his voice cracking.

"It's not about what I think."

Nightwing wrung his hands. "I know it seems quick… but… we've had a baby together. We're living together. It's natural progression? It's what people do."

"Is it?"

Nightwing cast Batman a sideways glance. "_Normal_ people."

Batman raised his binoculars. "I wouldn't know."

"Right." Nightwing huffed, his breath steaming against the cool, night-time air. "Thanks for the heart-to-heart."

Batman pressed a few buttons on the top of the binoculars to change the focus. "Why?"

"Why what?"

"Why do you want to marry her?"

"Umm… well…" So many reasons. So many thoughts and wonderings and arguments he could have used and Nightwing couldn't remember a single one of them.

"There's really only one correct answer, Dick."

Nightwing puffed out a breath. "'Cause I love her."

Silence filled the space between them. Then Batman nodded. "Good answer."

"Batman," Oracle's voice clipped through the air and broke the mood. "Arkham's had a break out."

* * *

**_Author's Note: _**

_Sharing night-time duties is all well and good and great for first baby. Doesn't work so well with more than one, you just end up with two zombie parents instead of one. It is hard. _

_Night-time feeding and put back to sleep allowed me to watch the entire series of Buffy the Vampire Slayer with baby 2 over the course of several weeks (this is because the feeding sessions took about 45 minutes, it's not quick). I did all the night-time stuff on my own, simply because hubby worked, and he got baby 1 ready in the morning so I could sleep in a bit longer. That's something we worked out, how we wanted to do it. Other couples share duties. It's up to you._

_All the books do recommend you get babies into the sleep at night routine as quick as possible by not engaging, putting them straight back down after feeds are done and stuff like that… and I also know, first time parents, new baby? No way in hell are you going to put that baby down for the first few weeks. You get to learn the hard way. She's mewing, is she cold? Was that a sneeze? Omg is she still breathing! Check the baby! She's asleep. We must all be as quiet as possible not to wake the baby!_

_Second time mums = she's fine. Done feeding? Get that sucker into bed again. Sleep. I am so not walking you around the entire night just because you're mewing a tiny amount. Nope that wasn't a real cry, wake me again when you're really hungry. Wanna do something noisy? The baby has to get used to noise._

_**Psst**. Alright. Kater. Airdrie. Even though you're not supposed to be reading, here is the end of the story. Everyone lived happily ever after. No bad stuff. Okay? Okay._


	28. Choices

**_Author's Note:_**

_I've been procrastinating, sorry. It's hard to be motivated when you're coughing every sentence. Hard to follow a single train of thought. So this chapter took longer than I liked. Next one will be faster._

* * *

**Choices**

"_How_ many?"

"Fifteen," the Warden confirmed.

Nightwing scrubbed his hand over his face. "All right."

"We have nine more contained and being transported back and my officers have most of the fifteen located."

"Most?"

The Warden couldn't quite look him in the eyes, instead concentrating on shuffling papers on his desk, a clear evasion tactic. "We… lost track of Dent."

"Two-Face?" Nightwing questioned, exasperated. "Tell me the Joker is still contained."

"He is," Batman murmured.

Nightwing nodded. That would have been the first thing Batman checked on. "Any others? Is V'aan contained?"

"The Tamaranian?" the Warden asked, looking at his papers again. "He is, which we are investigating."

Nightwing frowned. "Why?"

"Because he's the one who started the riot which allowed the others to escape."

Nightwing narrowed his eyes in thought, but looked to Batman. V'aan had become a thorn in everyone's side lately, spewing nonsense and claiming all sorts of diplomatic rights. Being told that Tamaran knew of his location and didn't care enough to ask for his release had done little to cease the antagonisation from V'aan.

Nightwing couldn't wait until Starfire had her abilities back and ripped V'aan a new one.

"Degree of dangerousness first," Batman murmured. "He's contained, we focus on those who aren't."

"Let us know what you find out," Nightwing told the Warden.

Batman placed his finger to his ear as they ran back toward the Batplane. "Robin, help round up those escapees whose locations are known. Start with Gaggy. Let me know if you need help."

"_Oh, Gaggy. Fun_," Robin said, his voice dripping with sarcasm. "_Been a while since we played with him_. _How'd he get out and the Joker didn't?"_

Batman ignored that. "Oracle, start running a trace on Two-Face, see if you can't narrow down his location for us."

"_Right_."

"Also, get the feed from the Warden, watch the moments of the breakout."

"_Already downloading. I'll have an analysis asap_."

Batman looked at Nightwing.

"I'm in," Nightwing responded, clambering up the side of the Batplane and into the seat.

For the first time, Batman looked uneasy. "You sure? Because if you want to—"

Nightwing fired up the engines. "Are we checking local haunts or what? We should start with the club he owns."

Batman gave him a blank faced look.

"She'll only worry," Nightwing reasoned. "Better to ask forgiveness than permission."

Batman leapt. "You get to explain that one to her," he said as the cockpit closed.

"Don't have to," Nightwing replied. "Donna's visiting tonight. I doubt my presence will be even missed."

Batman laughed.

Before his accident, Harvey Dent had a number of properties around Gotham. Most of them had since been surrendered or sold, but Nightwing knew there were still enough around for Two-Face to use as a hide-out if necessary.

The Dented Ostrich hadn't heard from him, nor did they know where he might go. The bouncer had been completely surprised by the Batplane's arrival and while Nightwing was sure there were probably other nefarious activities being conducted within the club, harbouring Two-Face wasn't one of them.

Leaving instructions to call police if Two-Face showed, and bugging the bouncer quietly just in case they decided not to, Batman and Nightwing continued their search.

The Asp Hole, the local haunt for snitches and henchmen, hadn't much information on the breakout itself, let alone Two-Face. Nightwing really hated it in that place, the smokiness, the half-naked women dancing in cages who seemed mostly baked, the women who were more scantily clad dancing in secluded corners of the place. He didn't really want to watch that kind of thing. Nightwing wasn't even sure why a place like this still existed in Gotham, but it certainly had its uses.

Most of the time, today information was as scarce as ladies clothing.

Oracle sounded in their ear as they left the Asp Hole. "_Nothing on Two-Face_," she said. "_Robin's managed to round up three so far, he's moving onto the others._"

Nightwing grumbled.

"Nothing at all?" Batman asked.

"_I have a location on one of his henchmen, that's about all_."

"Give," Batman instructed. "We'll do some interrogation."

"_You could just wait for Two-Face to come to you_," Robin's voice said over the comm. "_He's always a man with the plan_."

"Which I'd rather thwart before he has a chance to do whatever it is," Batman replied.

"The waiting game is boring anyway," Nightwing included.

"Henchman location?" Batman asked, ignoring him.

"_Outside Gotham, halfway to Blud, there's a warehouse district_. _Sending coordinates._"

"It's always a warehouse," Nightwing muttered.

"You're welcome to go home if it's too mundane for you," Batman returned, climbing back into the cockpit of the Batplane.

"I'm good." Nightwing checked on the location Oracle had sent through. "Huh. I didn't know anything was there."

"Neither did I," Batman said. "Do we have any background, Oracle?"

"_Ahh… purchased five months ago. I have a bunch of shipping records but… nothing out of the ordinary. They ship… glass and glass products, make it in-house so be careful of melting vats. So, it's a factory-cum-warehouse. Business name, all the credentials are legit. Pay their taxes on time."_

"So, unremarkable."

"_Yes_."

"So what raised the red flag?" Nightwing asked.

"_The man registered as owning the place has no assets of his own and was previously listed as an associate of Dent. He couldn't have afforded to buy the place and, according to the bill of sale, the price is the exact amount of money which was transferred from Dent's accounts five months ago. There's been a large inflow of cash in the past few days, and not much to show for it."_

"We'll check it out," Batman said, flicking a few switches as the plane took off.

"He's been planning this," Nightwing noted, reading through what Oracle had sent.

"It appears so."

"Care to hazard a guess as to his game?"

"I never guess with Two-Face. The coin makes things too unpredictable."

Nightwing agreed with that. "Yeah."

Batman peered over his shoulder at him. "Do you have—"

"Always. Never leave home without spare coins."

"Good."

Nightwing nodded, then pulled out his cell. Chances were he'd get voicemail. If Starfire was feeding, she'd not get up for anything until Mar'i was done, but that was okay. "Hey," he told voicemail. "Just me. Gonna be a little longer than expected and I didn't want you to worry. I'll see you when I get home. Have fun with Donna and message me if you want me to pick up anything." After he was done, he double checked the phone was on silent mode.

"Any luck with the surveillance footage?" Nightwing asked, putting his phone away.

"_Still processing_," Oracle replied. "_Initial analysis… well… it looked all very staged to me._"

"How so?" Batman asked.

"_V'aan's making a very obvious scene. Two-Face and a few others were being very obvious about who they were watching before he started. Smells of set up_."

"So either they knew he was going to create a distraction," Nightwing said.

"_Or they're all in cahoots_," Robin included.

"Why would V'aan be in cahoots with Two-Face?" Nightwing asked. "Seems to me Two-Face seized an opportunity."

"Perhaps," Batman murmured.

"Have any of the guys you've taken in said anything, Tim?" Nightwing asked.

"_Nah, not really. Just… followed the crowd it seems_. _Gaggy, for example, seemed to know he'd be taken back pretty quick, I found him hitting on a local stripper. Humpty Dumpty was visiting his grandmother's grave. Rhino was at the toy shop, apparently it's his kids b'day soon… so I kinda allowed the toy he'd stolen to be delivered to his son, after it's been checked."_

"So… like I said, opportunistic escapes."

"_Seems that way_._ But you know, for once I'd love it if they all worked together. Can you imagine the shit which could happen if they all teamed up together?"_

"Yes," Batman said. "And it's not something I'd wish on anyone."

Nightwing shuddered. "Ultimate evil," he said. "We had long, late night discussions over that possibility."

"It's one of the reasons why the Justice League was formed."

"_Oh_."

"And why we have varying degrees of detainment," Nightwing added. "S' also why the Titan villains are kept in different places than the Justice League ones. Prevents cross contamination."

"_I guess_."

"We have a lot of fun theorising about a league of super villains."

"_You'll have to share some of your hypothesises_."

"Come for drinks on Friday," Nightwing suggested.

"_Is that an open invitation_?" Oracle asked.

"Includes baby cuddles."

"_I'm there_."

"All right, kids," Batman said. "Enough chatter. Going dark."

The warehouse/factory was a large building surrounded by smaller buildings and demountables. Four trucks stowed inside the yard, behind the high, barbed wire fence. Men scattered the area, patrolling, standing around drum fires, or playing poker by firelight. Nightwing counted a few visible guns, more than was necessary for a normal security squad.

"Hmm."

"Too many," Nightwing muttered.

"Hmm."

"You take the ones on the left, I'll take the ones on the right?"

"No evidence," Batman reminded.

"Let's get eyes on Two-Face then," Nightwing said. "That'll be enough evidence."

"Take the roof entrance on the main warehouse," Batman muttered. "I'll check the other buildings."

"Right."

"Dick, do not engage unless you have to."

"I got this."

Batman regarded him. "Okay."

"Want a boost, old man?" Nightwing said, grinning. He shifted so his back was to the fence, bracing his hands and knees.

"Acrobats," Batman muttered, backing away.

Nightwing smirked, then allowed himself to be the force which propelled Batman over the barbed wire fence. By the time Nightwing had scaled it himself, folding around the barbed wire in a few complex manoeuvres, Batman had vanished into the dark.

The main warehouse was easy to scale. Several long drains tacked against the corrugated wall were strong enough to support his weight without making a lot of noise or breaking part way up. The whole place had that newly fixed up feel to it, rust spots mixed in with new fittings. There was some sort of machinery being operated within the warehouse, Nightwing could hear the purr, the noise would conceal his footsteps on the roof.

He crossed it as quiet as he could, heading for the venting window in the roof. Taking up a position which would make him the least vulnerable visibly, he peered in.

The warehouse was well lit in the centre, the red glow of a vat of melted… something. But the edges were dark as though it were eating the light produced by the vat. A few men patrolled, walking along off-the-ground long wireframe footways, as well as milling on the concrete floor at the bottom. Too many people.

Testing the window, Nightwing was pleased to discover it was unlocked, so he slipped inside, creeping through the rafters as he tried to see what the men below could be guarding.

Lots of machinery covered in grey cloth, there were two unguarded dome looking cloth covers down the opposite end from where Nightwing was, a second floor office and managers overlook which appeared empty as well. The men seemed to be mostly patrolling around the vat in the middle, whether that was what they were guarding or they were attracted to the light and warmth, Nightwing wasn't sure.

The men didn't seem to be of Two-Face's usual calibre of henchmen either. Perhaps it was a breakaway attempt… It happened from time to time, men would think they were better than the men they followed and attempt to overthrow. It worked especially well when the leaders were incarcerated, but for people who followed Two-Face or the Joker, or other well-known villains, it always ended up somewhat of a suicide mission to try and take over their organisations.

Perhaps that was why Two-Face had seized the opportunity to escape. Someone was taking over and he wanted to stop them, in which case, Two-Face was probably lurking around here somewhere as well.

Why was one of the guys carrying a harpoon gun? Nightwing frowned at the oddity. Such a strange thing to be carrying. And he didn't like the way the man stroked the harpoon gun, or pointed it around at the other men… He looked like he was bragging about something.

Nightwing crawled along the beam he was perched on, trying to reposition so he could hear what was being said. They were too far away and the ambient noise was such that a bug would be useless. The guys below were really the only interesting things in the room and the group seemed pretty chatty, so why not eavesdrop.

"I don't like this," one guy was saying as Nightwing grew closer.

"Quit your bitching."

"I'm serious. It's wrong."

"And we were all hired for our sterling good natures."

"You can't tell me you wouldn't be pissed if it were you."

"I wouldn't put myself in that situation."

"Maybe. But did you have to shoot her through the leg with one of those harpoons?"

"Boss flipped a coin, said it was okay."

Nightwing frowned. Confirmation of Two-Face, but who was this girl they shot? With a harpoon, no less. He looked up and down the warehouse, pondering, but nothing stood out.

The man with the harpoon continued, "'Sides, she tried to fly. Had to take her down."

Nightwing gripped the beam he sat on, mentally running through everyone he knew in and around Gotham who could fly and Two-Face would have a grudge against to allow her to be shot with a harpoon. It wasn't a very long list.

The first man shook his head in disgust. "It's sick. Of course she tried to fly. She was trying to save—"

"You're paid to guard, not gossip," a third man said.

The first man turned to him. "Dude, you can't tell me you're okay with this situation."

"Don't get paid to be okay. Now shut your gobs."

Nightwing pulled out his cell, dialling home. He had to check. Just to be sure. The ring tone sounded in his ear, but nothing. No answer. Message bank. Swearing softly to himself, he tried their number again.

And felt a clammy hand encircle his ankle.

Pulled roughly, he went one way, his cell the other.

"Well, well, look at the sneaky little mouse I found."

Flicking his arms, Nightwing gripped his escima sticks and kicked out at the person who held him. His boot connected with something solid and the man 'oofed', but kept a grip on his ankle. Rolling his shoulders, he took the slam to the wire walkway in the middle of his back and scissored his legs in an attempt to rid himself of the hand. The move worked, the hand released him in favour of a boot kicking him in the ribs.

Rolling, Nightwing curled himself protectively around the area which had been kicked, using the man's own force against him to roll back onto his feet. Bracing, he took a look at his attacker.

Big was an understatement. Brute was just as bad. Wannabe Quarterback/Bane sidekick was probably the closest thing which described the man. Nightwing knew he couldn't allow him to land a hit, even with the armour of his suit the blow would hurt. The bigger they are, the harder they fall is not as accurate as Nightwing would have liked, especially since he'd been lax in his training lately. Not a lot, but with new baby he been a touch neglectful.

Spinning his sticks, Nightwing waited for the brute's attack. End this as fast as he could, get Starfire on the phone, find out what the hell was happening.

Over the brute's shoulder, he could see the other guards gathering, including harpoon guy. Nightwing narrowed his eyes.

"You're gonna wanna come all quiet like," the brute said.

Nightwing snorted.

"The pretty songbird will pay if you don't."

"What songbird?"

The brute turned to his comrades. "Go help the others."

"But—"

"Do it. Batman's out there. But this party's for Nightwing."

"You're not making much sense," Nightwing said, trying to ignore the sinking feeling in his belly.

"Ain't my job to," the brute said and gestured. "Come."

"I don't think so."

"I can beat you into submission of you like."

Nightwing hesitated, then shuffled his feet and relaxed from his stance. "Alright fine. I'll follow."

Hindsight is a bitch.

The brute lead him to where the two sheet covered domes were and stood between them. As he waited, Nightwing became aware of another presence.

"Well, well… Dick Grayson."

It was only years of training which stopped him from reacting. "I'm sorry?"

A cane clicked, Two-Face lurked in the gloom somewhere close. "Things you learn in jail. See, I made good friends with a certain Tamaranian fellow while I was there, he had some very interesting things to say."

Defeat rocked through him along with the sharp spike of realisation. "You planned your escape together."

"Among other things," Two-Face said and the brute gripped both the sheets and pulled them down. He stared at Nightwing for a moment, then walked away.

"You have a choice, dear boy. One I don't think you'll like very much," Two-Face said and then explained.

Nightwing's heart grew heavier with every word. His mind refused to understand it. It couldn't be. Not this. Not _this_.

An impossible choice. And only one choice could be made. No second chances, no revision. No possibility of cheating. This trap had been well crafted and Nightwing would lose.

Two keys. Two locks. Two lives. Only one key could be used at one time. The cage belonging to the other lock would be destroyed once a key was used.

One would live. The other would die.

Two-Face prowled behind him, the click of a cane, the soft shuffle of an uneven gait. "Choices, choices."

Nightwing swallowed heavily as he stared at the contents of the cages. His eyes trailed upward as he examined his surroundings. Surely there was a way to save both. Surely if he was quick enough. Smart enough. Worth enough. He'd paid his dues. He'd saved so many lives, given so much of himself to others, surely the universe couldn't be this hard on him. Wouldn't ask for this much.

Can't breach the glass, that would set off the gas in both cages. He didn't think he could get above the cages fast enough to dismantle the delivery mechanism without it being manually set off. Couldn't count on the occupants being able to help themselves. No hope.

"I love this. What to do, what to do? Oh, the agony you go through, which shall it be?"

Not like the movies. Not like the books. There's no right answer, no way out. A choice had to be made. He had to make it and live with the choice.

He grit his teeth, clenched his fists. "I'll kill you for this."

A metallic sound filled the air, followed by a slap of a hand. "Oooh, my luck is with me today. I'll give you one free shot, but that's all you'll get."

Nightwing rolled his shoulders and grimaced at the flash of pain along his spine. Batman was out, still battling and trying to make his way in. Nightwing couldn't count on his father making it here in time, especially since neither of them had known about this. It was supposed to be a routine capture. Not… this…

He wished he'd had a chance to alert the Titans, he could have used their help. There'd just been no time. He couldn't call now, any move he made without selecting a key would force the gas release. He was being watched so closely.

"Tick, tock. Make your choice or they both go."

His hands shook and he forced them steady. He had to do this. He had to. There was no one else who could. It was his responsibility to differentiate between the two cages.

In one… Starfire, his beloved, his breath and heart, lay battered, bleeding, dying. The pool of blood at the bottom of her transparent cage was indicative of the short lifespan she had left if she didn't get help. She worked for every breath, her eyes glassy and barely seeing. The chances of her full recovery, well, with one look at her leg and Nightwing knew even Raven couldn't save it.

The other… his six-week-old daughter. Unharmed, thankfully. She gurgled and waved her arms in the air in the general direction of the baby mobile clipped above her head.

A leer from the shadows. "Do you want to try the coin toss? Heads, I win. Tails, you lose."

The keys gave an unforgiving clang as they bounced off each other and dangled before him.

Starfire's gaze drifted from Mar'i to his. Despite the agony, despite the choice he knew she knew he was forced to make, she smiled.

Nightwing steeled his heart and reached.

* * *

**_Author's Note:_**

_And there it is._

_Side note: Gaggy, Rhino and Humpty Dumpty are all minor Batman villains. _


	29. Wait

**Wait**.

Nightwing paused mid-reach, his fingers almost touching the key. "A child, Harvey?" Nightwing asked, grasping at straws. "A little baby? You'd stoop that low?"

Two-Face's voice changed, becoming contrite as the more charismatic half took over. "Yes, it is terribly uncivilised of me. But then, she's not entirely human is she?"

Nightwing watched Starfire. Could she use her powers? They'd said she tried to fly. Perhaps she was waiting for the right moment to strike. Like when Mar'i was safe. If only she'd give him a sign. "You never struck me as xenophobic."

"The coin, dear boy. The coin decided. Not me."

He argued that point. "You offered it the choice. On some level—"

"It's more fun that way. I can never predict the coin, I must offer it wild choices occasionally or it will never flip true."

His eyes drifted to his daughter. "She's just a baby. You wouldn't harm a baby."

"So you choose your girlfriend over an innocent baby?" Two-Face clicked his tongue. "The media won't like that."

Nightwing barked out a short laugh. "They'll crucify you."

"Didn't you know, dear boy," Two-Face said, laughing. "I'm insane." He twittered. "Certified and bona fide bonkers." A tap of his cane. "I'll give you a hint. Batman failed when confronted with this choice, left me with this glorious face, let _her_ die. You'll choose wrong too."

"I'm not him."

"You're more like him than you will ever recognise."

Nightwing swallowed. "Mercy."

Two-Face took several steps into the light. "What?" he asked with tilted head and disbelieving expression.

"Take me instead," he begged. "Leave them both alone. Have some mercy. Please."

Two-Face scratched his chin and the coin glinted. "How intriguing. I never-"

"Ask the coin," he gambled, his fingers itching to throw his stash. If he could just… "Ask it for mercy."

"You're wasting time," Two-Face dismissed, his voice turning grating. "No trick will stop me, I learnt my lesson. You have thirty seconds to get one of them out of there. Choose."

Thirty seconds. _Thirty seconds_. He could get them both out in that time. He would. They depended on him. He'd save them both or die trying.

Mar'i first. The innocent, the helpless, always first. He grabbed her key, knowing better than to take Starfire's key at the same time less Two-Face take them both from him.

Jamming the key in the lock, he threw a wild, panicked glance at Starfire.

Her eyes glassy as she watched him, that smile still on her face. He got the feeling she knew something he didn't.

"Get out!" he mouthed at her at the same time he twisted the key.

There was a tiny, almost imperceptible shake of her head. "I love you," she mouthed.

His heart pounded in his chest.

The door hissed at it opened and he jammed a birdarang into the hinge to stop it from closing behind him. At the same time he did that, his action hidden by the over-the-top movement he put into jamming the birdarang, he activated his emergency all-call alarm. He had one made after V'aan and given it to every Titan. An emergency activation alarm they could use which would summon every single available hero.

It was a call to war.

A villain going after family was war and would not be stood for.

The mechanism above Starfire's dome whirred and as Nightwing watched, Starfire gulped in a breath and held it. Her eyes held no fear, only resignation. Acceptance.

He didn't want her to accept. He wanted her to fight. He wanted her to win.

Scrambling across the floor, Nightwing scooped up his baby girl.

Navy green gas filtered down from above Starfire, noxious death and there was nothing he could do.

Nightwing scampered back to the door, curling his baby against his chest to protect her, leaving several bombs on the floor behind him.

Starfire's key was gone. So was Two-Face. But he couldn't worry about that right now.

Dual birdarangs flung at the cage around Starfire, they clipped against the glass and clattered to the ground. Nightwing could see the chips they made and knew it would take every bomb and birdarang he had left to breech it and even then it would not be enough.

Not glass then.

"_No_!" Hammering on the dome with one fist, the other hand holding Mar'i, he pleaded and begged to whoever would listen. "Star, you gotta break the dome! Find the strength! Please! Two-Face! You have to let her out. She'll die in there! Her baby needs her mother! You can't do this! _Please! I'll do anything_! _Starfire_!"

Fumbling for a birdarang, he jammed it in the hinge of the door and tried to pry it open. His heart thudded harder with every moment that the dreaded gas was in the dome with his precious girl.

He couldn't get leverage. The birdarang wouldn't slide.

Her eyes were closed. Was her chest moving? Her leg. _Her leg_. What if it wasn't the gas at all? What if she was bleeding out?

Oh, god, what should he do, what should he do? His stomach churned with panic, his heart threatened to burst out of his chest. The foreboding feeling he was running out of time increased exponentially with every second and he still couldn't figure out what to do.

"_Starfire_!" He planted all the explosives he had on the door, around the frame, hoping the blast itself would free her or at least weaken the door so he could break it. Once planted, he bolted away from the door to get Mar'i clear.

The explosion rocked the dome but he didn't hear shattering added into the sound.

Smoke hazed, obscuring his view but he knew it hadn't worked.

He thumped down on his knees, staring. All strength drained from him, replaced with hopelessness.

Mar'i screamed.

The noise must have frightened her. Both arms encircled her, holding her close, the jiggle which had come from late night walks to calm her automatically occurring. But his attention still on the dome. Everything he tried hadn't worked.

It was all his fault. All of this. He should have been home. Should have protected her. Should've been there.

He could have prevented everything if he'd just been there.

He couldn't see anything else, not Mar'i, not the dark figure running toward him. Not the roof which crashed open above him. Not the alarm from the communicator blaring. Nothing but the dome of gas and the still woman inside.

A war cry and the dome shattered.

Nightwing blinked, his eyes refocussing.

Donna flew above where the dome used to be, her expression ferocious. Then she darted down and into the gas and a few moments later, she flew out of it, cradling Starfire in her arms.

"Starfire?"

Landing hard on her knees beside Nightwing, Donna clasped Starfire's chin, then pressed two fingers to Starfire's neck.

Nightwing held his breath. His eyes pricked, his heart wouldn't quieten. Every movement was wound up in Donna.

Her face crumbled, just for a moment, before she lay Starfire flat on the ground. Two fingers under her chin to tilt her head back, then Donna's mouth covered Starfire's.

Nightwing watched Donna perform CPR on Starfire until tears blurred his vision. No amount of blinking could clear them, the fabric of the mask wet so he tore it away to see.

His fingers brushed her forehead. He willed all his strength into her. Begged her to open her eyes.

Batman aided Donna, taking over compressions while Donna acted as Starfire's lungs.

People were appearing. Faceless ghosts to witness.

He couldn't see, couldn't think, couldn't feel.

Mar'i continued to cry, her little fists tugging at his shirt.

Someone offered to take the baby, a soft feminine voice but he ignored them. He wasn't releasing her. Not to anyone. He made soothing noises, jiggled. Tried to comfort but he'd forgotten how.

Red hair pooled on the floor. Blood.

A wordless shriek.

_Raven_.

Raven was here.

Raven would make it better.

She _had to_.

She had to make it better.

He couldn't see for the tears. He breathed through his mouth, heavy pants, working for every breath.

Black energy. A pressing hand.

A sorrowful face. Resignation and tears as she was gathered up in grief.

The world dissolved.


	30. It can't be true

**Author's Note:**

_Because people don't heed the angst warning at the beginning. Or think I was joking._

_WARNING: MAJOR FEELS._

_KATER THIS MEANS YOU (Airdrie you too). BACK BUTTON LOVELY LADIES. SMUT IS INCOMING SOON, PROMISE.  
_

_Read at own risk._

* * *

**It can't be true.**

**Official**

Nightwing stared at the piece of paper and the swimming words printed on it.

"I have a prepared statement," he said, staring at the podium he stood behind. His voice was rough as he spoke. "No questions please."

The media gathered to listen raised their microphones and cameras. Silence filled the room. They'd all heard, all had notifications something had occurred but this would make it official.

His hands trembled. He took a deep breath and let it out slowly. This was his duty. He could do this.

"At eight-thirty last night, fifteen inmates from Arkham Asylum escaped. Among the escapees was Harvey Dent, commonly known as the criminal mastermind Two-Face. Two-Face's henchmen captured and detained Starfire and her infant daughter and…" He swallowed heavily and his head dropped until his chin rested against his head.

Batman moved from the line of Titans and Justice League members flanking Nightwing and placed his hand on Nightwing's shoulder as a show of solidarity.

Nightwing swallowed. "While Starfire's daughter is safe and currently recovering with her father, Starfire…" he choked on the words.

"Let me," Batman murmured. "Please."

Nightwing shook his head. "It's my duty." Swallowing again, he laid the piece of paper flat on the podium and rested both his hands on the edges. Raising his voice as much as he dared, he announced, "Starfire perished in the attack."

Breathlessness and outrage from the press, questions firing about the circumstances.

Nightwing clasped the edge of the podium to stop his hands shaking. "Her family is asking for privacy. We would ask respect during this time of grief. The Justice League and the Titans would like you to know Two-Face will be captured and returned to Arkham, pending a trial for murder."

Clicks from a camera, thrusting microphones and bright, blinding lights, everything to capture this moment of pain. Questions and voices which all seemed to bleed together into one big mess.

"Starfire was… a wonderful woman," he choked out. "A fierce warrior and a true friend—" The sob which had been building escaped and his mask felt wet again. Nightwing took a step away from the podium, his hands still clasping the sides and bent over to hide from prying eyes as he tried to find the strength to face them again.

So raw. The pain scraped at him. Any moment he expected her to float down and say it was all a joke. Take him in her arms and tell him it would be okay.

To see her smile once more. To hear her laugh. To listen to her voice. To snuggle together on the couch, Mar'i between. Rainy days and sunny days and Sundays and sunsets from here until forever.

They wasted _so_ much time.

How was he to go on without her? How was he going to raise their daughter on his own?

Troia wrapped her arms around him, two hands on his upper arms as she lent him strength. "Let's go," she murmured, her voice thick with tears. She pulled him away. "You shouldn't have done this."

She kept her arms around him all the way back into the Justice League Official Headquarters.

**Denial**

"But—"

"I double checked myself," Raven said softly. "She knew."

"_No_."

She pushed on, relentless. "She cauterised the harpoon wound as best she could, I can sense evidence of a fast burn." Raven shuddered. "It must have hurt so much—"

He shook his head sharply, not wanting to hear this. "Raven stop."

"It slowed the bleeding, but the bastard cut the artery. It was inevitable."

"Don't say that!"

"I'm sorry."

He denied it hotly. "It's not true! If I'd gotten there faster, if I'd chosen _her_ key—"

"We would have lost them both." Raven stretched out her hand and placed it on his chest. "I'm sorry. There wasn't anything anyone could do. It was already too late when you got there."

"But— she was _alive_, Raven. She was alive and she smiled and—"

"Starfire always had extraordinary strength of will," Cyborg murmured. He leant against the wall, his head bowed and his arms crossed on his chest. The large dent beside him was indicative of his outlet for the pain. Beside him, a dog curled in on himself, having retreated to animal form because the grief was too hard to bear. "She probably held on as long as she could so that she knew Mar'i was safe."

Nightwing shook his head. "Her powers, she flew, she used her starbolts, why didn't—"

"Dick," her voice cracked and Raven shook her head. "I have no answers. There are no answers for this."

Nightwing bowed his head and closed his eyes.

"It doesn't make sense," Troia murmured.

Cyborg placed his arm around her. "Death never does."

**Anger**

Nightwing grit his teeth. "We're coming."

Batman wouldn't hear of it. "No. You are emotionally compromised." He looked beyond. "All of you. You shouldn't do this."

"So are you," Raven pointed out. "Everyone's compromised, Justice League and Titan alike. We should—"

"I need to see this through!" Nightwing demanded. "I need it to end!"

"The Justice League will recapture Two-Face," Batman said sternly. "We're already closing in on his location."

"We want to help," Beast Boy growled.

"She's a Titan," Cyborg included, outraged.

"All the more reason you should allow us to do this," Superman said.

"We need to show a united front," Troia included. "Titans and League working together, not the League taking Titan duties."

"Which is why the rest of the Titans are coming to witness. And you five will remain here, along with Robin."

"Trust us, bro," Flash murmured. "We'll take care of it."

"As the leader," Nightwing interjected, ignoring his best friend. "And members of the founding five of the Titans, it is our _right_—"

"Nightwing," Batman said, stern. "No."

"I have to come!" Nightwing spat. "I _need_ to finish it."

"You—"

"Two-Face needs to… I chose Mar'i over— I'm _never_ going to— "

"You protected your child," Batman interrupted, resting his hand on Nightwing's shoulder. "Just like I'm protecting mine.

Nightwing stared at his father.

Batman pushed his cowl back so he could view Nightwing, a rare thing for him to do in the presence of so many people, especially at the Justice League Headquarters. "Dick, that little girl needs you. Don't throw yourself into danger, not right now. You have to think about her." Bruce looked beyond Nightwing again. "Go back to the Manor, all of you. Take the time you need to grieve. Let the League and the Titans pay the respect Starfire deserves on your behalf." Bruce squeezed Nightwing's shoulder. "Be with the part of Starfire she gave you. Mar'i needs you and you need her."

**Anger**

In the end, Two-Face turned himself in.

No one said a word about the injuries Two-Face had sustained. Not a single thing as he was frog-marched back to Arkham by Batman, escorted by the full force of the heroes of the Earth.

Watching the procession on the Batcomputer, Dick nodded. The best part, he thought, was when Jinx stepped forward and told him in a low, menacing voice, lady luck had left him, his coin would never fly true again.

**Interlude**

Mar'i wanted her mother. Dick didn't have the right parts. She didn't want the bottle, it didn't taste right.

She wanted her mother.

She wanted the smell. The voice. The taste. The comforting arms. A full belly.

They were both upset. They were both tired. Frustrated. Hurt.

Dick pleaded with her to take the bottle. Offering it to her each time she cried but she refused it.

Now, late at night, he paced around his room in the Manor, his daughter in his arms as she cried hysterically. He had no idea what to do.

It was a daze. A blur. An endless stream of people passing him by while he stood still. The passage of time was meaningless, it didn't take away the pain. It didn't make it bearable. It only festered.

It was so hard. Watching them cry. Watching the tears stream down Raven's face. Watching Troia weep into Cyborg's chest. Watching Alfred stare out the window. Seeing the naked pain on Cyborg's face. Seeing Beast Boy's tears.

All their grief left him hollow. The tears had run dry but the pain still ached.

He just wanted them all to go away.

But when they did, he was alone in his thoughts. Just he and Mar'i.

He was lost.

Bruce, Alfred, Tim, Raven, Donna, Cyborg and Beast Boy. All of them had refused to leave his side.

Bruce had opened his home to the mourners.

Dick wanted to go home, to his home. To _their_ home. He'd taken a step inside and seen the blood on the floor.

Starfire's blood.

_couldn't breathe couldn't feel there's no Starfire why isn't she here where did she go oh god Silkie momma's gone._

He'd never had a panic attack before.

"Please, baby girl," he told her in a voice bordering on hysteria. "Take the food. It's all I can give you. Just try it. A little taste. Then you can sleep."

Her cry rose in pitch.

He slumped on the couch, still offering her the bottle and allowing some of the formula to dribble into her mouth, which she spat up. "I know you want mommy. I want her too. But she can't come. Please. Take the bottle. For daddy."

All sorts of possibilities whirled through his mind. What if she couldn't have human formula? What if that was why she refused it? It could hurt her stomach. It had no energy in it. Perhaps it lacked the essential vitamins and minerals which only Starfire could provide.

Was he going to have to watch his daughter starve to death because he couldn't get her to eat?

Silkie leapt up beside him, warbling and sniffing at Mar'i as if to ask her what was wrong. A soft knock at the door and Alfred entered without being asked.

"Did you draw the short straw?" Dick asked, grief, tiredness and frustration making him angry. He just wanted to be left alone.

"Would you like help?"

"I got it."

"On the contrary, Master Richard," Alfred said. "I do believe Mar'i is sensing your mood. Your frustration is making it difficult for her to relax."

Dick lifted his head and took a look at the man he considered his grandfather. A fluffy, yellow, bathrobe, Dick recognised it from Christmas. Starfire had insisted on purchasing Alfred it, a gift which had been greeted with an indulgent smile and draped over his arm for when he needed it. Dick never expected him to wear it.

Alfred lost her too.

Pain lanced his heart. Made him sick.

Alfred gathered the tails regally and sat beside Dick, holding out his arms. "Please, allow me."

Dick handed her over, then flopped back numbly against the couch. Closing his eyes, he tried to ignore his crying daughter.

**Bargaining**

"You want my help?" She laughed. "That's a first."

Nightwing honestly didn't know what he expected. Not laughter, that was certain.

But then, he wasn't sure if he had expected to find her grieving or not. She lounged, stretched out on the bed of her cell, watching him from beyond the reinforced glass which was her only window to the world.

He was at the end of his rope. Tangled with grief of losing Starfire was the fact his daughter was starving herself. She wouldn't eat, couldn't sleep soundly. She'd cry herself into exhaustion only to snap awake again within an hour because she was so hungry. He needed help, needed _Tamaranian_ help and there was only one he could think of.

Not even Alfred could get her to eat and that was saying something.

"Tamaran has refused to help me. They said…" he closed his eyes. "They're holding me personally responsible for… and they won't help a half-breed."

"And you think I will?"

"You're her aunt."

"Oh, and if that doesn't make me feel all _tingly_ inside." Blackfire smirked and mock shivered. "Bloodlines has such a strong, emotional, hold over me."

Nightwing thrust a hand through his hair. "I don't want my daughter to die. She won't eat, she hasn't eaten since… she needs to eat and whatever we're trying doesn't work. We think she needs Tamaranian energy."

Blackfire shrugged.

"Please."

Blackfire raised an eyebrow. "_Please_?"

There was a mountain clogging his throat. "I can't lose her too."

"The great Nightwing, begging little old me—"

"I won't beg," he said.

"Oh, really." She smirked. "I think I can—"

"I begged him and he still—" His voice broke and took a while to return. "Please. Tell me what I can do for Mar'i."

Blackfire stared at him, her face impassive. "Was it a hard death? Did she suffer?"

Nightwing swallowed heavily, his throat working hard to stop the bile from rising. Appalled, he was all set to reprimand her but when he opened his mouth all he could choke out was, "Yes."

Blackfire blinked once, then rapidly several times in. "_D'kit atrestu, X'hal_," she muttered and reached for a tissue.

He knew better than to mention anything about the sudden display. He'd hoped under that hard shell, there would be some semblance of sisterly compassion.

Blackfire blew her nose, studying the floor. "Does Starfire have a _gyldaberry_ bush?"

Nightwing nodded. Eyestalk plant, with mouth worms for food. "Several. She… went through a craving for them."

"Soak a berry in the milk before you give it to Mar'i. You'll probably get a day's worth of bottles from one berry… it'll help with the taste."

"Not energy?"

"She's six weeks?"

Nightwing nodded.

"Doesn't need it anymore. I mean, it's comforting if she gets some, but she doesn't need it. She's being fussy. I guess." Blackfire shrugged again.

Nightwing felt hope for the first time. "How long do we soak before giving it to her?"

"Overnight for best results." She studied him. "You can probably do five or ten minutes for the first one, since she's not eating. An hour if you can handle listening to her cry."

"Thanks," he said and turned for the door.

"To be honest, I thought you'd come here to ask me to take care of V'aan and Two-Face."

He froze, his back to her. "What do you mean?"

"What do you think I mean?"

He turned slowly, watching her.

"I'm in prison, aren't I?" Blackfire said, smirking. "Forty years for treason. Not a lot to do around here. Could do with a transfer. Reduced restictions. I could… _entertain_ myself in Arkham."

He licked his lips, his mind whirring. "Hypothetically… if I were to get you a transfer, what would you do?"

"I know how Earthlings feel about death, Starfire was very clear on that." She waved her hand around. "You have a wonderful phrase. 'Living hell', I believe it is."

"Why?" he asked. "Why would you offer—"

"They hurt my baby sister," she snarled and her hand clenched into a fist. "Only I get to hurt her."

He studied her. The need for revenge, the want to unleash Blackfire on the two of them, just to make them hurt like he did was so strong… "I'll… see what I can do."

She was up and pressed against the glass before he could take a step back. "And I want to see her."

"Who?"

"Mar'i. I want to see her again."

"No." Wait. "Again?"

"Starfire brought her to see me. Showed her off like a proud mom. She's got your hair."

Nightwing nodded, not having the words to speak.

"Didn't you know?"

He shook his head.

Blackfire said, "She's part Tamaranian. You're going to have needs. Needs which I can supply."

"No."

"So you know all about transformation then? About the changes a Tamaranian woman goes through. Or are you just going to fly blind?"

"I know about transformation."

She pressed her cheek against the glass. "It's just the tip of the developmental iceberg. There's so many changes a girl goes through before that. The _sufic'ktr_, the first energy release. Flight. Strength. The language integration. Things you don't know about."

Nightwing shook his head. Having a Tamaranian who was willing to tell him what would happen in his daughter's life because of her heritage would be beneficial… but Blackfire? "Given the relationship you had with Starfire, I'm not sending my daughter into that sort of pain."

"I won't hurt her. My grievance was with Starfire. Mar'i's going to need that Tamaranian connection." She grinned. "You wouldn't want to deny her that part of her heritage."

"And you're doing this out of the goodness of your heart."

The smile disappeared into melancholy. "She's all the family I have left. Galfore's gone. Starfire's gone. Wildfire has disappeared… it's just me."

Nightwing swallowed.

_What would Starfire do? _

He closed his eyes against the pain. "Supervised visits. I'll monitor everything, I'll be there _every_ time you see her. You say anything I don't like, _anything_ bad about her mother, and you'll never see her again."

"Done."

"Two-Face and V'aan?"

Blackfire smirked. "It's better if you don't know."

She was right about that.

**Goodbye**

A box…

She'd been reduced to a box, resting on a bonfire. The traditional way to farewell a Tamaranian warrior.

A box on a fire that would carry her away from him forever.

Batman stood on the podium, staring out at the close family and friends invited to this. Only the closest, as per Starfire's request. Hidden away from prying eyes and camera flashes.

Only the ones she loved the most.

Troia. Oracle. Beast Boy. Cyborg. Raven. Alfred. Robin. Flash. Jinx. Green Lantern. Catwoman. Miss Martian. Bumblebee. Aqualad. Newly named Arsenal. Mas Y Menos. Argent.

The majority of the Titans and Justice League would attend the statue unveiling later in the day. Others would have their own wakes, their own time to bid her farewell.

This was theirs.

This was _his_.

Nightwing pressed his lips to his sleeping daughter's forehead.

"_T'dar mycarn_," Batman murmured. "We are gathered here today to farewell…"

* * *

**_Author's Note:_**_ In the Teen Titan Go comics (the one with Wildfire), Blackfire's was in prison. She was in this sort of glass box, something would have been inhibiting her powers to prevent her escape. Not a lot of information was given on how she was contained, so we're expected to extend disbelief._

_Also, I've been ask if I'm doing Kingdom Come. As far as I know, there's no evidence Starfire died then (I could be wrong, never read it). She is gone, but I always took that to mean she'd gone back to Tamaran. I don't know though. So no. I'm not doing Kingdom Come. I'm doin Krydom Come... that doesn't have the same ring to it (and sounds mildly dirty. So just ignore that)._


	31. Limbo

**_Author's Note:_**

_Transient: In essence, I am Dick and he is me. Within character of course. A lot of the thoughts, feelings, moments are the ones I had less than a year ago when my brother suddenly passed on. So I can completely understand how you would feel reading this, with your own loss so fresh, because I have deliberately poured a lot of my own emotions into these latest chapters. I have not been able to write a sentence without tears in my eyes, so it's been tough going (and I did it anyway =U). I am curious as to what you noticed._

_Joshua: Is it "nowhere near as great" in terms of plot, writing style and skill, or is it personal preference? Because all those pervious stories you listed then were with couples you like, everything works out, happy endings, no loose ends and few unanswered questions. Whereas both 'Secrets of the Heart' and 'A choice made' were designed to make people question what's acceptable in a fanfiction and feel pain and angst and were listed as such. The fact I can get such a deep emotional response from you in regard to this story is exactly what I was aiming for. We all have favourite stories (my fave of my own works is Masks), but just because something happens in a story we don't like, it doesn't make it a bad story. So, when you say 'nowhere near as great', what exactly are you saying? That you prefer to read the other ones where everything is hunky dory, or that I have failed to tell a good, emotional story, or it's just that I have an ending you would prefer not to occur? Would you feel any different if this one was not my last story? If you just don't like it as much as the others, that's fine, but to say 'nowhere near as great' implies there's something wrong with my writing, not the content._

* * *

**Limbo**

**Statue**

Nightwing studied the hologram and readjusted his hold on his daughter.

Just like he imagined. Not standing straight and tall, staring out into the distance like the other holograms of fallen heroes and friends did. Starfire's image floated, her feet lifted away from the floor. Her face was awash with wonder, a brilliant smile on her face, as though she had discovered something precious. Her hair floated around her like a sea of red and her hands clasped against her chest.

"This is how I remember her," Batman murmured.

Nightwing nodded.

Raven placed her hand on the back of Nightwing's shoulder and rested her head on his arm. "Everything was wonderful to her."

"A fitting tribute," Cyborg murmured his voice thick.

Beast Boy choked and turned to bury his face in Raven's neck. "I'd rather have her back."

Troia rested her head on Nightwing's other shoulder. "We all would."

**Anger**

They wouldn't leave him alone. They kept talking about her. All the time. They thought they were helping. They thought opening wounds like this, talking about her, sharing memories and laughter was therapeutic.

It wasn't.

It just reminded him of what he'd lost.

It might be helpful for them, but he hated it. Hated the way they talked about her.

Happy memories. Good times. Great times. Parties he'd not been a part of. Jokes he'd missed. "Dick, do you remember when—" and no, he _didn't_ remember because he wasn't around and he hadn't been a part of her life then and he'd had no idea how much he'd missed.

He hated the 'it's okay' or the 'it'll get better' because it was not _okay_, and it was not going to get _better_, it would just get different. While different might be _okay_ eventually, eventually wasn't _now_. He wasn't ready for different.

And the hugs. The _hugs_.

Everyone touching, everyone hugging him. They wouldn't let him breathe. Wouldn't let him go. Continual unwanted contact. Every hug made him think of her. Every hug she had ever given him came rushing back every time someone wrapped their arms around him unbidden.

They were rubbing salt into a wound.

Nights were the worst. People around him all day, their presence crushing, but he didn't have to worry about Mar'i. They took turns. Cuddle and change and feed and rock to sleep. He didn't need to watch her, didn't need to be there, could just wallow and stare.

But night… night they vanished and left him alone. Night meant it was just him and her and an absence which filled his heart and stretched into tomorrow and every day after.

He hated the night.

Hated the dark.

Hated her.

Hated her because she left him alone.

Hated her because she gave him a daughter then left him alone.

Hated her because she made him love her again. Pushed and prodded until he fell head over heels and then left him alone.

Hated her because he could have been with Babs and then none of this would hurt because she left him alone.

Hated when his daughter cried or laughed because there was no one to share it with because she left him alone.

Hated her because she never gave him a chance to ask her to marry him.

He missed her so much.

It still hurt even when there were no tears left.

**Anger**

"Dick, I need to speak you."

Dick blinked and turned his gaze away from the horizon. "Yes?"

Bruce paused halfway into Dick's bedroom at the Manor, glancing at the empty cradle by Dick's bed.

"She's with Alfred."

Nodding, Bruce said, "Hal approached me with a concern."

"Oh?"

"Someone authorised Blackfire's transfer to Earth. Specifically Arkham Asylum."

"Uh-huh."

"Was it you?"

"Yes."

Bruce sighed. "Dick, we can't allow—"

"She's going to help me with Mar'i."

"I don't think—"

"She's Tamaranian. She's the only Tamaranian I know who is willing to talk to me about what might occur in Mar'i's life."

"That's not why you asked for a transfer."

"It was part of her deal," Dick said, blasé. "She'll help me, I move her into a less secure prison."

"Then move her to Belle Reve."

"Too far away. Another part of her deal was she wants to be able to see Mar'i."

Bruce sighed again. "You can justify it all you like, but you and I both know why you're doing this."

"She's moving to Arkham."

"I denied the application."

Dick's arms slithered from where they were crossed on his chest as he spun to face Bruce. "_What_?"

"It's unhealthy. Unleashing Blackfire on Two-Face and V'aan, as much as that might make you feel better, it won't bring Starfire back."

"I made a deal," Dick protested. "If I don't honour it, Blackfire won't give me information about Tamaranian children."

"We'll deal with everything that comes as a family. We have more than enough friendships with other aliens too—"

"It's not the same—"

Bruce interrupted, "Hal can help, his ring can—"

"She's _Tamaranian_," Dick spat. "Starfire would never forgive me if I didn't teach Mar'i about where she comes from. I know parts, but there's so much I don't know. Blackfire does."

"And you trust a single word that comes from that woman's mouth?"

Dick rolled his shoulders. "Of course not."

"Then why push for the transfer?"

"I need her close—"

Bruce shook his head. "That's bullshit—"

"She's Starfire's sister, she has a right to—"

"That's also bullshit, you don't want her within ten feet of—"

"_They need to pay_!" Dick's chest heaved, his hands clenched into fists. "Two-Face is going to get off. He's going to claim insanity and they'll extend his sentence. We can't _prove_ V'aan's involvement. They killed her and they're going to get off scott-free. They have to pay for what they did to her!"

"Revenge is—"

"Don't talk to me about revenge!" Dick snarled and jabbed a finger at Bruce. "Everything you do is about revenge."

"No—"

"You donned a fucking batsuit to get revenge—"

"I donned the suit so no one else would ever face the loss I did—"

"You _failed_."

Bruce pressed his lips together. "I know."

Dick bared his teeth. "Move Blackfire to Arkham."

Bruce considered Dick. "Two weeks. I'll give you two weeks to reconsider. I'll put her transfer on hold until then."

"What would two weeks do?" Dick snarled.

"Give you time to realise this is the wrong decision. I agree Blackfire's knowledge and involvement might be beneficial to Mar'i, but moving her to Arkham isn't the right idea."

"I don't need two weeks," Dick snarled. "I _know_—"

"This isn't you, son, and I'm going to give you time to realise it. This isn't what Starfire wanted."

"Starfire would have killed them herself if it had been me."

Bruce nodded. "Yes."

"So why can't I—"

"Because you live under a different set of morals than she did. She wouldn't want you to break them. Not even for her."

**Apologies**

A rare moment alone.

Raven, Beast Boy, Bumblebee and Cyborg had all gone back to the Tower in Jump for some time. Bruce and Tim were doing hero-y things and Dick had no interest in joining them.

Alfred had handed Mar'i to him and said in no uncertain terms he would not be taking her back until morning and Dick needed to spend some time re-bonding with his daughter. He felt bad. He'd barely seen her, barely cuddled her, preferring to let everyone else look after her while he wallowed.

Sitting on the armchair with his feet up in the TV room, he watched a movie with the volume down very low while he held her as she slept. He felt bad for ignoring her, not that he realised he'd been doing that, so it was nice just to hold her and watch her sleep. Pick up her little hand and watch her fingers as he ran his along her palm, watch as she curled her hand, smiled as she made little '_mookmook'_ noises.

He hadn't been a very good dad. Granted, it wasn't without reason, but Starfire would never forgive him if he didn't protect and cherish that last piece of her. "I'm sorry, Mar'i Gal, I'll do better," he whispered and pressed his lips to her forehead.

"Glad to hear it," Babs said from the doorway. "We were all worried."

His smile was half-hearted. "Yeah, I know. They left you to check on me?"

"No," she replied and navigated the room until she was by his side. Brushing her fingers over the top of Mar'i's head, she said, "We haven't had any time. Everyone's been around. When Alfred said you'd be alone today… I had to come."

Dick raised an eyebrow.

"I'm sorry."

"Thanks," he said, an automatic response.

"No. Dick… I'm sorry for pushing. I'm sorry you had so little time. I'm sorry I got in the way—"

"Babs, you were _never_ in the way."

Her voice tear thick, "If I hadn't been… if we… you would have had more time…"

"No one can predict the future," he said. "We had the time we had and I'm grateful for that."

Tears trickled down her cheek. "Dick—"

He reached over and placed his hand over hers. "We were happy, Babs. And… I'll have good memories to share with Mar'i…" he swallowed heavily and blinked back the tears. Returning his hand to his daughter he said, "That's the important thing."

Twisting the chair, Babs turned so she could wrap her arms around him. Dick lifted his hand and gripped her arm, gently touching his head to hers.

**Anger**

The centre furniture of Dick's bedroom at the Manor had been pushed back, a colourful mat lay on the floor in its place. Raven had quilted the mat as a present for Mar'i, including all sorts of colourful images and cutesy animals, ducks and geese and other such birds. When she'd given it to them when Mar'i was born, Dick had joked she'd had to cleanse herself after handling the mat, it was just too bright and cheerful.

Starfire had loved the mat. It had gone with her whenever she took Mar'i out so she could lay her on the floor when needed.

Now, it was spread across the floor in his bedroom, Mar'i wriggling in the middle. Dick lay on his side along the edge of the mat, his head pillowed by his bicep as he watched her try to raise her head, smiling brightly and encouraging every time she did. Silkie curled up at the opposite side, giving Mar'i incentive to turn her head.

A soft knock at the door interrupted their tranquillity. "Yes?"

"It's me," Donna called through.

"Hey," he said brightening. "Come in."

Opening the door, she smiled as she saw him and Mar'i on the floor together. "Wriggle time?"

Lifting his head from his arm, he looked over at her. "Yeah."

"Am I interrupting? I can come back."

He smiled. "No, it's fine." Resting his head back on his arm, he said, "Lie on her other side, Silkie stopped being interesting."

Donna crossed the room, lying opposite Dick on the other side of the mat. Gathering her hair, she draped it over her shoulder as she rested her head on her hand. "Hiya cutie. How's she doing?"

"Happy day today."

Donna nodded. "And you?"

He shrugged, not really wanting to talk as he rested his hand on Mar'i's back.

"Star's flat's all clean. Her plants could use some love, but they're doing okay."

Dick nodded. "Thanks, Don."

"Are you thinking about going back to it?"

"Yeah. Getting crowded here."

Donna stretched out her hand and placed it in Dick's. "They all just want to make sure you're okay."

"Yeah. I know," he sighed. "Plus… Bereavement leave is nearly finished. I either have to take leave, or go back to work."

Donna looked concerned. "Don't go back to work."

"Might take my mind off things."

"Dick, don't go back. It's not been long enough. What would you do with Mar'i?"

"Bruce and Alfred have already said they'll fund a nanny, if I want."

She looked sceptical. "One who can handle superpowers?"

Dick shrugged. "My other option is to have Alfred watch her while I'm at work."

"And that means a lot of travel."

"Yeah. Probably means a move back to Gotham…"

Donna chewed her lip. "I could do it."

Dick blinked. "Do what?"

"Nanny Mar'i."

"You have a job."

"One which is mostly freelance," Donna said. "Weddings, parties, Fashion…" she swallowed and blinked several times. "I can't… I can't take those shots right now… I look through the lens and I see… and…"

Dick nodded. "Yeah… I understand."

She echoed his nod, knowing he really did. "I… want to be around more. For Mar'i's sake. And yours. Think about it. You're not going to feel safe leaving Mar'I with just anyone. Not now. Not when she's a superpowered little munchkin. You're going to need someone who can get her off the ceiling when she's happy, who can help her temper her strength. Someone who knows what you do late at night and is fine with you leaving at all hours. "

He squeezed her fingers. "Donna—"

"Don't go back to work yet."

Dick nodded. "I'll take a few more weeks unpaid leave… we can… discuss this."

Mar'i gurgled and lifted her head, turning it. Her whole body shook with the effort, her legs lifted up from the ground and her feet waved, but she turned it toward Donna.

"Hello gorgeous," Donna cooed and booped her on the nose.

Mar'i made a happy noise and kicked her feet.

"Is that… is she smiling?" Donna breathed. "That's a smile!"

His lips twitched upward. It was hard not to be pleased. "Yeah."

Donna met his eyes and filled with water and he could tell what was on her mind without her voicing it. Starfire had missed it. She'd missed the first smiles. She'd never seen it. He squeezed her fingers, ignoring the tear that crept down her cheek, misplaced upon the smile on her face as she cooed at Mar'i.

"I miss her," Dick said softly, staring at the floor.

"Me too," Donna returned.

Another knock at the door. "Yes?" Dick called.

"Master Colon is here to see you. He brought a guest so I put him in the visitor's pallor."

"Okay," Dick called. "Who's the guest?"

"He would not leave a name," Alfred replied. "Do you wish me to send them on their way?"

"No, I'll talk to him."

Donna tilted her head. "Your roommate from College?"

"Yeah," Dick said, releasing Donna's fingers and sitting up. "Saw him… after… but we haven't had much of a chance to catch up."

"Didn't you too have a falling out?"

Dick shrugged. "He didn't… approve of how quickly Star and I appeared to get together."

"Ahh."

"A lot of people didn't understand. Alvin warned me about having a child."

"I'm sorry."

Dick gently picked up his daughter. "I'm not," he said, positioning her on his shoulder. "C'mon, Mar'i Gal, let's go see what he wants." Getting to his feet, he offered Donna his hand and pulled her up.

"Do you want me to come with?" she asked, surprised.

"Yeah," he said. "If you don't mind. He knows better to show up unannounced. You can take Mar'i, depending on what he wants."

Donna smiled and made playful grabby hands at him. "Cuddles."

Alvin sat on a sofa in the visitor's pallor beside a man who Dick instantly recognised. He stopped at the door and stared.

"Dick," Alvin said, oblivious to Dick's sudden hesitance. "This is—"

"Henry Fitzpatrick," Dick answered. "The photographer who sexually harassed Starfire and was fired."

"It wasn't harassment," Henry corrected. "Starfire was sleeping with me, but with her pregnancy—"

"You're a liar," Dick replied, angry. "And you're not welcome here."

"Dick, just hear him out—" Alvin protested holding up his hands.

"How dare you bring him here," Dick snarled. "What are you thinking?"

Alvin blanched. "I'm trying to help you, man—"

Henry wouldn't be quietened. "Starfire was a money-grabbing whore—"

"What did you say?" Donna snarled, stepping into the room.

He cut Donna a glance and dismissed her. "And she stole my child—"

"I _beg_ your pardon?" Dick blurted, tightening his grip on Mar'i.

"Did he just," Donna looked between Dick and Henry and her face twisted in anger.

"You need to take a paternity test," Alvin advised. "Henry has proof he was in a relationship—"

"Sexual harassment—" Dick told him. "Not a relationship."

Henry lifted the manila folder he had on his lap. "I have DNA evidence—"

"_So do I_," Dick snarled. "Do you think I'm stupid? I can see this for what it is. You claim she's your daughter, fabricate some 'proof' and then say this will all go away if I pay you. Since my father's Bruce Wayne, money should be no object, right?"

Alvin snapped his jaw shut and looked at Henry in surprise. Henry stared back at Dick, resolute.

"Didn't think of that, did you, Alvin?" Dick snarled, heartsick someone he considered a friend would do something like this so close to her passing. "We've had _so_ many similar cases over the years. Besides, I have proof of my own. Recorded evidence of him _harassing_ Starfire. DNA evidence of Mar'i's parentage, oh yes," Dick scoffed at Alvin. "I checked. Starfire was insistent. But go ahead and try for your grab at money. I'll see you in court."

"Dick, can I throw him out?" Donna asked, her hands clenched into fists. "Dragging Starfire's good name through the mud. How _dare_ you," she snarled, "even insinuate Starfire cheated on Dick. She's never—"

Dick touched Donna on the shoulder to stop her and turned his head. "Alfred?"

"Yes?" Alfred asked, appearing at the doorway.

"Call the police. Have Henry here charged with attempted extortion."

Alfred's expression darkened. "At once."

Henry got to his feet only to be shoved back in his chair by an angry Donna. "Hey, you can't—"

"Dick, I didn't—" Alvin began, flustered and making a desperate attempt to prove his innocence in this.

"And you," Dick snarled, "are no longer welcome here. You know me better than this. Or at least I thought you did. Are you really that desperate for me to be single and free you'd believe him?" He rolled his shoulders and glanced at Mar'i. "You'll be examples for others who try the same tactic."

"What's going on?" Bruce asked, striding into the room.

Dick smirked. "Extortion attempt."

Bruce cut Dick a glance, looked pointedly at Donna and said, "I'll take care of this."

Dick nodded, more than happy to let Bruce take over. "C'mon Donna."

"I want to break his nose first," she snarled and Henry paled even further.

"Donna," Bruce warned.

"Stupid, egotistical male," she snarled. "By Hera, you will pay for this slight—"

"Donna," Dick said and tilted his head toward the door. "C'mon."

She flicked her gaze to him. "He insulted Starfire—"

Dick rubbed Mar'i on the back. "Come help me put her down for a nap."

Donna narrowed her eyes, but followed him.

Dick cast one last glare at Alvin, feeling their friendship break under this betrayal. He shook his head and left, ignoring the call of his name.


	32. Life

**Life**

**Six months**

**_Photographer pleads guilty to extortion._**

_World renowned fashion photographer, Henry Fitzpatrick, plead guilty in open court yesterday for attempting to extort money from Bruce Wayne—_

"World renowned photographer my ass," Dick muttered. He elbowed the door to the stairs open, folding the newspaper and shoved it under his arm. The guilty plea had nothing to do with poor old Henry waking in the middle of the night to find Batman, Nightwing, Robin and Troia at the end of the bed, all incredibly insulted Henry had slandered Starfire. Nor Troia's offer to skin him alive if he ever so much as made a peep of noise against a girl again.

None whatsoever.

Fumbling for his keys, he adjusted his backpack and walked down the hallway to his apartment.

The lights were off, the apartment dark and empty when he arrived. Placing his keys on the hook beside the door, he sniffed the air. Something was in the slow cooker, curry by the smell. The timer said it had another three hours left to cook, which was fine because it was Tuesday. Donna wasn't far away, he just had to wait.

The apartment always felt so empty when he was there alone.

He headed into his bedroom to change, put his police uniform in the wash after carefully checking no toys/pencils/play doh/other stain producing object had inexplicably made its way into the drum again, then picked up half a dozen toys scattered around the living room. After checking his schedule for the next week had updated on the application he and Donna had set up so they could keep track of things, he sat down at the table to enjoy a cup of coffee. Halfway through the paper, he heard the jingle of a set of keys outside the front door and hurried to open it.

Donna beamed at him as he swung the door open. "Hello! You're home—"

"Dada!" Mar'i cried, launching herself across the gap between them.

"—early."

Catching his daughter, he gave her a sloppy kiss and a cuddle. "Hello Mar'i Gal, were you good today?" While she babbled an answer, Dick looked at Donna. "I finished up my paperwork faster than I thought."

"We were at the park," Donna said, slipping off her coat and hanging it up by the door. "And then the munchkin wanted strawberries."

He rubbed his nose against his giggling daughter's. "It's fine, I wasn't worried." Putting her on the floor, he said, "Go get Beary. We're going to see Blahfar."

Mar'i made her happy squeal and toddled off to find her prize toy.

Donna, as usual, giggled at the nickname and Dick grinned at her. It was somewhat of a hilarity between them, Mar'i choosing to make the same noise every time they visited, so the name stuck. While picking up a language was easy for a Tamaranian hybrid, Mar'i lacked the prehensile tongue, which meant she had to train so she could speak. So while she understood everything said to her, reproducing the sounds was just like any other child. Practice and determination. So in trying to reproduce names, often the words became garbled. Sometimes interpreting them was tricky.

Hence Blahfar for Blackfire. Blackfire gave the image of not being impressed, but secretly Dick thought she liked the name.

Lifting the small bag by the door, Donna said, "I'll repack this for you before I go. We've had a couple of stinkers today."

Wrinkling his nose, he closed the door. "Big plans for tonight?"

Donna headed for Mar'i's room to repack the day bag. "Bubble bath, glass of wine and good book. And not changing any more dirty diapers."

"Sounds amazing."

"Oh, you'll need to pick Mar'i up from Alfred tomorrow."

"Oh?" he asked, accepting the bear from Mar'i as she toddled out from her bedroom with it.

"Yeah," Donna said, following Mar'i out and handed him the bag. "They rescheduled my shoot and I have to go in an hour earlier."

Dick nodded and headed to the fridge to get two premade bottles. "Not a problem. When was the last time she ate?" he asked, packing them in the bag.

"Besides the packet of strawberries? About an hour ago." She got down on her knees and held out her arms. "Okay, Mar'i. Give me a big kiss and cuddle, Aunty Donna's going home."

Mar'i came rushing up, her lips puckered. She was in such a hurry she tripped over her own feet, somersaulting through the air in a drunken bumblebee's version of flight before ending up on her bottom. "Oop."

Donna laughed and scooped her up to plant kisses all over her face. "Be good for daddy."

"Bye!" Mar'i said, monkey jumping (floating) from Donna's arms into Dick.

Dick had finally conceded the point to Bruce, knowing that it wasn't the best thing to move Blackfire to Arkham, regardless of how much they all wanted her to have a go at V'aan and Two-Face. Moving her to Belle Reve was the only other viable option. While she still had to wear a restraining belt, she had a lot more freedom. And visitors Tuesday and every second Sunday. Sunlight.

Dick had used that as incentive. Arkham was overcast. Dreary. There was little access to sunlight. Belle Reve was tropical. Bright. And she could bask as much as she needed, within reason. Even with her powers restrained, sunlight still fed her energy. Although Dick worried that one day it wouldn't be enough to tether Blackfire into compliancy, at the moment she enjoyed her new found freedom.

Didn't stop Dick and Bruce (and the entire of the Justice League and Titans) to have several contingency plans in case of escape.

Mar'i knew she would never be allowed to see Blackfire without Daddy present, but not why. He didn't want to scare her. Not yet. He reasoned, however, that since Blackfire didn't know where he lived, and he'd be notified immediately of any escape, as well as Mar'i having a GPS tracker on her at all times, any snatching attempts would be dealt with quickly. Not that he believed Blackfire would snatch Mar'i… but it was better to be safe than sorry.

He always travelled the distance in the N-Wing, under the guise Nightwing offered him a lift, so long as no one on the ground actually saw the empty cockpit as the plane flew away to wait until summoned. Sometimes Batman would take him and do the rounds of the prison while Mar'i visited. Because Dick had Mar'i, the superpowered daughter of Starfire, it made sense to show a public appearance of an acquaintance. It would make things easier if Mar'i ever wanted to take up her mother's mantle.

Blackfire waited in a private room, seated on the large, brightly coloured play mat Dick had left at the prison, with the box of pre-approved toys.

"Blahfar!" Mar'i cried, giggling and waving her chubby arms around.

"Hello sweetie," Blackfire said, smiling in such a way Dick was reminded why she and Starfire were sisters. "Let's play."

**Nights**

When the aparatment was quiet, no little pitter-patter of tiny feet, no calls of daddy or silly aeroplane sounds, no dolls and toys which made noises. When it was dark and the world slept, that would be when he missed her.

The empty space beside him. The absence of the hand on his chest.

Never in his wildest dreams would he ever have imagined himself a single father.

On those nights, when the pain of absence was too much to bear, he would travel to the balcony and stare at the stars and imagine her lost, not gone. Imagine her drifting among them, watching them and smiling. Imagine how her hair would flow and her eyes would shine and her lips would feel against his as she danced through the air.

On those nights, when he missed her, he would chase her in his dreams, never succeeding. A whispering voice, a smile he couldn't capture. He would wake with damp cheeks, a churning in his belly and a heaviness which stretched into his soul.

**False hope**

When Jason returned to life, Dick's heart filled with hope. Perhaps there was a way she could return too. Whatever mystical powers which returned his brother could return his lover.

He searched. There had to be a Lazarus Pit which didn't adjust the mind. Someone who could recast Time's footprint. Some ancient ritual. Some destined path. A mystical intervention.

Raven set her steely eyes on him as he explained his problem. "Don't you think that was the first thing I did?"

"Yes, but if we work together—"

Raven shook her head. "The cost, Dick. The cost is always too high."

He was resolute. "I'll pay any price."

"What if it's not _your_ price to pay?"

Dick frowned. "It's for Starfire."

Her expression softened. "Dick, I know." She rested her hand over his. "These things always come with a price. What if Mar'i has to pay it?"

Dick swallowed.

"What if Mar'i's children had to pay it? What if descendants you'll never meet are the ones to pay? You can never tell with these types of things. What if Starfire comes back wrong? What if something comes back with her? What if Gar, or Vic or I or _Alfred_—"

"_Jason_ came back," he insisted, clutching at straws. "Who's paying the price for that?"

"I don't know," Raven said, her brow furrowing. "And I've been losing sleep over it."

"If he can come back, why can't Star?"

"Because the world _hurts_, Dick," she told him, angry. "Because it never makes any sense. Bad things happen to good people and there's nothing you can do."

"Raven—"

"Starfire wouldn't want it."

"I think she'd be willing to pay any price to see her daughter grow up."

"Not if the cost was her daughter." Tears filled her eyes and spilled over. "Dick, we _can't_. I want to. So much, but it's a deal with the devil and you know how those go."

He crumpled, burying his face in his hands. Raven rose to her feet, stepped around the table and wrapped her arms around him.

"I want her back."

She squeezed him and he felt a tear drop onto his arm. "So do I."

**Depression**

On Dick's good days he felt like he could cope. He got up. He ate. He talked to friends. He patrolled. He and Donna ate together and laugh. He played with Mar'i. Sometimes he would only be reminded of her once in a day. Sometimes it wasn't until the end, when he saw the picture by his bed and the sadness would come. He would pick it up, run his fingers along the frame and streak them down her face. Then snuggle down in bed and dream of happier times.

On his bad days everything was a struggle. He was angry for no reason. Barely ate. Snapped at friends. Extra vigilant. Keeping patient with Mar'i was about all he could manage, it wasn't her fault. Sometimes he was short with her and hated himself afterwards but mostly he was able to keep it under control.

On the worst of days it was almost impossible to convince himself to rise from his bed. He would lie there and stare at the roof because if he turned his head all he would see, all he would feel, was a crushing absence and despair. An all-encompassing knowledge she was gone and there was nothing he could do. She was everywhere and nowhere all at once. In the walls, in the plants, in the paint. She seeped through everything, every part of the apartment had a memory.

And he would have to get up. He would have to move. Force himself out of bed. Force himself to face the cold, harsh reality of life.

Because there was a little girl calling from the next room she wanted her daddy. She was his reason for pressing on. She was his only light in the darkness. So he did it for her. He lived for her.

In the beginning, there were more worst days than he could count. He never believed he would see the end of them. Slowly, they slipped to bad days, with the occasional good day thrown into the mix.

As Mar'i grew, so did the number of good days.

Every once in a while, as time stretched and carried away the mourning… every now and then when everything was in alignment, he would have a _fantastic_ day.

And that was okay.

**Discovery**

One of the best moments in his memory was when Dick walked the Manor in search of his four-year-old daughter and discovered Tim trying not to laugh outside a doorway. Peering through the crack, Dick was stoked to discover Alfred and Mar'i having a tea party.

Both of them were dressed as princesses, the ill-fitting pink apron perilously perched over Alfred's usual black suit, but Dick thought the tiara and the pink feather boa suited him perfectly.

"Al won't like you spying," Dick whispered.

"Wait for the voice," Tim returned. "Then you'll know why I'm still out here spying."

Dick couldn't contain his laughter when he heard it. Squeaky and falsetto, still containing Alfred's high level of decorum and that accent…

"Princess, would you like a scone to go with your tea?"

"Yes please!"

"What are you two doing?" Bruce asked from the hallway.

Tim and Dick leapt into the air, quickly straightening and moved away from the door. "Nothing."

With narrow eyes, Bruce walked to the door and peeked through. Then, with a stern glare at his two boys, he pushed open the door. "Do you have a pretty dress for me?"

Mar'i beamed.

**First day**

Dick tried to ignore the nervousness churning. "Now remember, no—"

Mar'i heaved in a sigh. "Flying at school. No starbolts. No punching the other kids in the face if they're mean. No lip contact if someone speaks another language. And I don't know who Batman is."

"You forgot the most important one," Donna said, kneeling down beside her to straighten her uniform tie.

Mar'i frowned. "Uhh…"

Donna held onto the lapels of her jacket. "Have fun. Make loads of friends and enjoy yourself."

"Oh!"

Dick grinned and squeezed his daughter's hand. "Very important rules, those ones."

Bouncing up and down on the spot, Mar'i said, "Can we go now?"

Donna took Mar'i other hand. "Yes, let's. Time for school!"

**First day blues**

Mar'i was sullen when Dick picked her up at the end of her first day at kindergarten. The teacher had said everything had gone fine, Mar'i was a wonderful child, so polite and courteous and vexingly articulate, which didn't explain her mood right now.

Dick peered at her through the rear vision mirror. "Honey, what's wrong?"

She sighed and her bottom lip quivered.

Dick hit the indicator, pulling off into the nearest available park. Turning around, he asked, "Didn't you enjoy school? Did someone say something mean?"

"All the kids had a mommy."

A ball knotted in his throat. "Oh."

"Lian has a mommy. Iris has a mommy. And I don't."

"You have a mommy, sweetie. She's just not with us anymore."

"'Cause she's dead," Mar'i said with the bluntness only a child could supply.

Dick nodded. "You know she'd be with us if she could."

"Can't I have a new mommy? You could marry Aunty Donna."

"It doesn't work like that," Dick said. "And even if I married Aunty Donna, you'd still have a mommy."

"But I could call _her_ mommy!" Mar'i protested. "And then I'd be the _same_!"

His chest ached at her calling anyone else that, even Donna. "Being the same is overrated. If you were the same you'd have to give up flying. Or trapeze. Or tea parties in the Batplane. Or playing chasey with Uncle Tim in the Batcave. Other kids don't have that."

"But they have a mommy!"

"Not all of them," Dick corrected. "I bet if you asked, some of them wouldn't have a mommy. Maybe some of them wouldn't have a daddy. Maybe some of them might have two daddies. Or two mommies. Or maybe two mommies and one daddy. Some might even have no mommies or daddies and live with their grandparent. Every family is different, honey."

"_Two_ daddies?" she giggled.

Dick smiled. "Sure."

"That would be fun. Can I have another daddy?"

Dick laughed and turned around. "We'll see."

"Daddy?"

"Yes, honey?" he asked, pulling out into traffic.

"Tell me a story about Mommy."

Dick smiled. "Mommy fell to Earth in a ball of green fire, all hissing and spitting like Silkie does when he's angry and I thought she was the most beautiful thing I'd ever seen…"

* * *

_**Author's Note:** Lian is Arsenal and Chesire's canon daughter. Iris is Flash's (and I'll leave you to have headcanons as to who the mom is). _


	33. Goes On

**Epilogue**

The night time air was fresh and cool with just a hint of salt, the breeze flowed across the ocean and through the city. Cars beeped, people moved along the streets, traffic lights changed colour. Everything normal and quiet.

She was watched, she could feel the gazes resting on her back, that itch between her shoulder blades she'd been told. So many eyes lurked in the city and tonight was no different.

No. That was a lie. Tonight _was_ different because _she_ was different.

She'd trained for this. She'd trained _hard_ for this. Her whole life, an assortment of techniques, no quarter given for her powers. Hand to hand combat, grapnels, throwing stars, pressure points, communications, computers, analysis of scenarios, body language, weaponry. They wouldn't let her attempt this until they were _sure_ she was ready.

There were vicious discussions, arguments and tears, but she said she was as old as he was when he started. It wasn't fair to keep this from her.

Even now, she knew on the night of her big debut, all her aunts and uncles, all her family, all of them would be watching from the shadows. To witness.

That was okay, because she was ready.

Even Damian would be watching. Damian who had already voiced his displeasure at her chosen outfit with his trademark click of his tongue and a cutting remark about how ill-suited and inappropriate it was. She wasn't going to let him get to her. He was _so_ rude, just because he was a year older. Tonight was _her_ night and he would eat his words.

Mom would be proud of her. She'd heard the story so many times, it was often used as an example of why she shouldn't want this, but it only made her want it more. She was sure she could _change_ it. One day, one day she'd find her. One day she'd find a way to go back and stop what changed her father's life so dramatically. One day, she'd meet her and have a chance to know the wonderful woman her family talked about for herself.

Because that's what heroes did. They _changed_ the world.

First, she had to get stronger. Older. Prove herself.

She crawled along the awning toward the edge, peering down into the city which was her home. Tonight was the night she would soar above it as someone new.

"Are you ready, Nightstar?"

She turned her head, smiling at her father. "I was born for this," she said and leapt over the side.

The night went green.

* * *

**INSERT SEQUEL HERE**

* * *

**_Author's Note:_**

_Yes. This is the last chapter of A choice made. But, it's okay. Look at that foreshadowing! Bask in it! –mad finger waving and oooh noises which would make Sokka proud-_

_From this point, it's not about Dick anymore, but Mar'i and her journey, which makes it prudent to end this story here. _

_I always intended this end, with Mar'i taking to the sky and stepping into Starfire's mantle. It did involve a rather snarky comment from Damian about her outfit and banter, and Nightwing being all parental and 'stop ogling my baby girl, you fiend, she's only ten!', but it didn't really hand the story over to Mar'i, so I removed it._

_I've spent the last few chapters setting things up. Blackfire is back. Jason is back. Damian exists (for those who don't know, Damian is Bruce's one biological son, from Talia Ah Ghul). There is a complete lack of Babs (look at that suspicious absence, look at it.) Donna helped raise Mar'i. Raven thought about a deal with the devil. There were mentions of other children starting to appear. _

_The sequel would have been called 'A daughter's choice', and I have it half written in my mind. Blackfire would have featured prominently. So would Donna. Damian (Romance). But it would have been Mar'i's story to tell, and since that's technically no longer Teen Titans cartoon… well… I said this was my last and I mean it. All that good foreshadowing to waste. =(  
_

_'A choice made' evolved into a lot bigger of an undertaking than I expected but I have thoroughly enjoyed writing it. But, all good things must come to an end and thus my fanfiction career is at its end._

_So, thank you for letting me share my imagination with you._

_Adieu_

_Kry_


End file.
